XV — Violent, Flowery Thoughts by Riku Reita

How disgusting.

That definitely was my first reaction when I saw him kneeling in front of me just like that.

Especially in front of a new friend I just convinced to go to school with me together.

Kaze Fujimoto was begging for the cash again. But this time, Anna was by my side.

Thanks to his overly strict parents, who didn't know when to stop. And also his spoiled behaviours, to do any reckless spending whenever he regained back that privilege.

Again. Again and again, and again. Which is exhausting.

But... why did I even arrive to this odd, unlikely circumstance even?

Let's circle back the timeline to yesterday, or what happened way before this event.

And yes, it was exactly the skipped part that had been left unexplained.

A short, gentle flashback before all of these were shoved into my face.

...

After the class, I soon rushed my way to the teacher's room.

But I had to escape from this group of mine first, way before that.

There were Kaze, Souta, Ichimiya, and Gorou.

And Iwas running away past them. 

Barely, as they delayed me once they saw my figure.

Forced me to stop.

"Riku-san. Where did you go?"

Souta was asking out of confusion.

"Hold on, toilet." I lied.

"Eh, should we wait? Did it take too long?"

Ichimiya, like usual, was asking an unnecessary question.

"No, don't wait for me! It's okay!"

"Let's meet at karaoke soon!"

I gave them a thumbs-up in the air while holding my crotch.

Kaze waved his hand. I didn't look away, even for seconds.

By the time I arrived to the teacher's room, it was too crowded.

Most of them had just returned from their class.

As for me, I just wanted to talk about the details on maths lesson.

There was this specific part that Kanzaki-sensei had never explained to others.

Myself included. Therefore, I wanted to know why.

However, his seat was empty.

"Excuse me, Ma'am."

"May I know where Kanzaki-sensei is?"

"I didn't see him in his desk."

I asked to one of teachers I just met in front of the door.

"Oh, him? He's likely at the rest room right now."

"You know. Smoking like usual."

Ah, what a habit he got here.

I thanked her politely then walked to the rest room immediately.

And as I entered for the first time, there he was. 

Resting, chilling like nothing happened.

"What is it, Reita-kun?"

He was asking that question while looking at the wall in front him, ignoring me.

His tone was dry, detached. Like usual, except his eyes looked so tired.

I didn't waste any time then asking him about the missing piece in my head.

By offering him my notebook instead.

Deep down, I know I suck at maths.

I just happened to be a model student because I worked hard for it.

His empty brown eyes gazed at it slowly, before getting hit by a sudden realization.

"Oh, this one! My bad, I didn't know that I was missing it..."

"Thank you, Reita-kun. You really are as helpful as always."

Uh, what? You haven't even replied!

He said while patting my shoulder, as if he already solved my issue.

"Anyway... as for your issue."

"I think I'm too busy."

Busy as in smoking and doing nothing?

I couldn't grasp this man's irrationality at all.

I was expecting him to at least teach me, or doing something at least.

Also, was it even polite to keep smoking in front of your student?

Where's your dignity as a teacher? Really.

"However..."

My ramble stopped out of curiosity.

I couldn't careless anymore. I just wanted to do better than this.

"I think she can help you explaining all of these."

She? Who exactly?

I didn't know whether he was being cryptic or just wanted to sound mysterious.

I couldn't even tell the difference between both so... why bother?

"I can give you her address, if you want to. She is really good at maths."

Wait, could that be...

No, let's not just assume it right away. I mean, it could just be another maths teacher.

A female one.

The one I didn't recognize yet, like the one I have just had talked to earlier.

However, I was dead wrong.

Effortlessly, he handed me a short note on the paper.

The address. The name. Along with the resident's phone numbers.

Anna... Kanzaki.

Maybe I should have known, that they both were probably related.

"Yes, Reita-kun. Ask her."

"She knows more than me."

"Her uncle."

...

"Mhm, sure!"

The atmosphere around me shifted after she said that.

It was hardly magical, yet it existed. Maybe as a promise, or a wish.

I didn't know nor understand what I was seeing in front of me.

She was smiling, with a grin on her face. So unlike her, yet so intriguing.

No, she's not that different... Riku. You might have fallen into her trap.

I couldn't resist accepting it directly. Instead, I wanted to know if it was right to show her that book I have had been holding for too long, saying I just visited the museum only a week ago.

And also this yellow book. The one I have had since ten years ago.

Yet soon after asking her to be my friend, I couldn't help but wonder if it would go any further.

Kazuko, may I?

A silent plea. A subtle wish from his deepest heart, yet couldn't be spoken as it was silent.

"Kanzaki-san..."

Hesitations were running in my head. Any deception would be unaccaptable for me.

Or else, it would be a betrayal to my own feelings. And hers, too.

"Uh, yes?" She answered. It was cold and shuddering.

"What is it, Reita-kun?"

Her expression was already shifted to that kind of gloom once again.

The one I always noticed from her. Every single time.

What I did was quite straightforward. 

I took out my smartphone from my left pocket, then opened RINE.

At least, that's what I hoped for if she got a RINE ID.

"Do you use RINE?"

She was shaking her head immediately, and slowly.

Figured.

"My mother said any social media app is a virus."

"She doesn't want me to get distracted."

How strict and so out of touch. What an asshole.

Wait, I didn't realize I was insulting the same person who raised this girl right from her womb.

Never mind. Forget it.

I'm really sorry, Anna...

I sighed in disbelief before continuing the conversation.

"I see. What about just e-mail then?"

I asked, not trying to sound judging.

"Ah, e-mail? Sure!"

Shortly after that reply, she then enthusiastically took out her phone. 

Also out of her briefcase, again.

How extremely convenient...

Apparently, I couldn't be bothered enough by the sight of that brown thing she used to bring everyday. As if it was never that heavy to carry for a school girl like her. 

Most of them got a trendy, fashionable bag already.

We then did exchange each other's e-mail.

Along with phone number too. She said it could also be an option.

I usually got annoyed by this, but I didn't at all.

And obviously, it was strange. I would rather not go any further usually.

"Use phone number instead for texting if you want me to reply faster."

She really explained it like it's some kind of basic rule.

I was aware she had a boundary, but doesn't it seem a little bit too much, no?

"And maybe..."

She stuttered. That delay clearly showed her anxiety.

Poor Anna.

"Maybe we will do a call too, if you want."

Ah, right. Of course...

I wondered if she already had been preparing for this from the very beginning.

Everything about it was a bit too controlled. 

Way too well-measured.

Methodical and well-practiced. 

As if she was already talking to herself in front of the mirror, then imagining any likely conversation or any scenario, from the most likely to worst possible one, that might come up as a topic. 

Just like any anxious, awkward person would do before facing their first ever interaction.

However, I could be wrong. Maybe she just wrote all of these in her own notebook, while silently doubting her competency at speaking, because she was forced by her mother to interact.

Without RINE. What a challenge.

The same like any person in the past would do. Writing a letter or diary about themselves.

She probably shouldn't have been here at all.

An Aomori girl who had lost her own way in the Reiwa era.

Because she belonged and was supposed to be living in Shōwa.

That's exactly the way I saw her.

 Always.