The "Angel"

She was an Arbiter. She knew the answer to his question.

But for the first time, she doubted her own judgment.

The gears in her mind spun and cranked. All she could think about was how to answer him. Even though he never brought it up again, it weighed heavily on her steps. Even when they arrived at the upper levels of hell, the question was still left to stew in her head.

Throughout their wandering, she lost track of time. How long has it been since they set out from her chamber? Having stayed there for so long, the concept of duration—the seconds and days that came with it—was muddied.

Forcing herself to focus on their journey, Angel declared, “We’re here. These are the upper levels.”

It was nothing like what they passed by below. The winds that terrorised them were gone. They were indoors now.

The upper levels appeared like an industrial-age factory. But to call it “modern” would be an insult to the demons who worked here. Cauldrons, furnaces, vats—the forms of torture here were crude and dehumanizing.

These forms of punishment most resembled what already existed in real life. So while the pain was unimaginable like the lower levels, the only comfort the damned souls here had was the idea of familiarity.

Not that most humans would be familiar with being boiled alive, but it was the thought that counted.

Wrapped around hers, Stanley’s hand trembled like an earthquake. “I-I’ve been here before…”

“What?”

Impossible. The boy was unfamiliar with the magma chamber and the gorge—he could not have made it through alone. How could he be here at the top and end up at the very bottom, at the Chamber of Arbitration? Hell might not obey all the laws of physical boundaries like the land of the living, but there were still rules that bound this plane together.

“This was the place where I first woke up.”

“How did you end up in my room from here?” Angel asked.

“I d-don’t know. I was walking around looking for Mom, and there was this big door. I walked in, and I saw you.”

This factory was essentially a singular, massive room. There was only one door. And it was the gate they pushed past to enter here from the middle levels.

“This ‘big door‘ is not the one behind us, correct?”

“No, it was in the middle of all the machines and stuff.”

“Could you take me to this door?”

“Eh?! Err, okay. I’ll try and remember where it was.”

Remember? And why was he so startled?

“Is it not on the Atlas?”

“It’s… empty. Nothing’s showing up on the paper.”

Everything about this felt off. How could the Atlas cease its function? Did it have something to do with the door? Was it some kind of anomaly as well?

Like the thoughts in her head, Stanley’s steps were full of doubt and hesitation. He was lost. It truly was the blind leading the blind.

The factory itself wasn’t too difficult to move around in. There were no environmental hazards. Here, the dangers were all man-made. And they’ve been non-functional for quite some time.

Layers of dust lined the surface of the human-sized pots, the corrosive liquids inside them absent. The endless conveyor belts lay silent and motionless. Rust infested the tubes and pipes, clogging and scarring what were once the arteries and veins of this operation.

And yet, despite the lack of immediate danger, the confidence in Stanley’s feet was even more drained than when he trod on slippery, unstable ground.

Angel asked, “What’s wrong?” 

“Umm… don’t be scared, but the door had a big snake-looking monster near it.”

It was a statement she did not expect. Of all creatures, a “snake-looking” monster? If he just said, “snake,” then she’d be more inclined to believe it was the devil himself. But there was no need for the Lord of Hell to assume any form other than his actual one in his own domain.

“And yet, you still went in the door even with that monster close by?”

“It told me I can find my Mom if I go in.” His voice started to quiver. “But we’ve already looked everywhere, right? What if… what if we can’t find her?”

“But you’re certain she’s still here, right? Even though hell is so empty.”

“The last thing Dad said to her before he left was ‘go to hell.’ Then the monster said she’s here, too.” He sobbed. “I don’t know what I’ll do if she’s not here. I don’t want to be alone.”

Angel knelt, her blindfolded gaze meeting his, smiling. “You’re not alone. I’m here with you.”

“But you wanted me to leave…”

“Not anymore. With hell in this state, I’m not sure what to do with myself, to be honest. And I’d much rather have you by my side, Stanley. I’ll try to figure things out while we look for your Mom. How’s that sound?”

His sobbing intensified. “Why are you being so nice to me? I abandoned you at the scary mountain place. You should hate me.”

“I think you’ve experienced enough hate in your life, don’t you agree?”

Unable to hold his tears back, the boy had no words to share. He answered the only way he could.

He hugged her, crying. The same tears that froze from the cold were warmer than anything Angel had felt before. Her broken wings wrapped over his head as her hand patted his back.

Despite the immense warmth she received, there was a stinging sensation inside of her. It was bittersweet. She knew the boy did not belong here, and yet, she no longer wanted to let him go.

Deep down, she didn’t want him to look for his Mom anymore.

But that kind of selfishness only belonged to mortals. It had no place inside her as an Arbiter. Knowing this, she treasured this moment. This fleeting feeling of warmth in a hell that has frozen over.

“Come now,” she whispered, pulling back. “Let’s pay this snake monster a visit and get some answers about your Mom.”

Wiping his tears away, she felt him nod as his hair touched hers.

They resumed their search in this labyrinthine factory. Even without the Atlas to guide them, they were no longer lost.

They had each other.

How much time had passed as they wandered together, Angel finally had a grasp of it. It was much too short.

“Hey, the Atlas is changing!” Stanley alerted her. “I think we’re getting warmer!”

She didn’t know why it was working again, but it mattered little. The joy in his voice was more than enough.

She asked, smiling. “What do you see?”

“Oh, there are no drawings. It’s just letters this time. They’re showing up slowly?”

An explicable sense of unease crept across Angel’s skin. That worry turned to dread as the boy read out:

“F-O-U-N-D Y-O-U”

Out of pure instinct, Angel shoved Stanley away. She did not know what hit her. Only that it did.

Unable to see, all she felt was the force of a massive hand grabbing her. It coiled around her body, creeping up her neck in an attempt to suffocate her.

She could not sense it. It was like an invisible force. This creature snapped her wings in a single blow. It happened so quickly, she didn’t feel any pain. All she felt was its rough, fabric-like exterior squeezing the unlife out of her body. The only thing snake-like about it was its constriction.

“St… an… ley!” She called out to him, hoping he was fine.

He was. But to her horror, he didn’t run away.

“Let her go! Let her go!”

Was he trying to fight the creature? Having been lifted off the ground, it was hard for her to tell.

“Thank you,” the creature uttered. Its voice was uncanny. Almost feminine, even. But definitely not human. “You brought her here for me.”

Angel forced several words out of her throat. “Who… What… are… you?”

“Blind as ever, I see? When will you wake up?”

The force in its vice was unnatural. And yet, it spoke as if it exerted no effort at all, even as she fought back with everything she had.

“Enjoyed this hell?” The creature asked, arrogance rife in its mockery. “You’ve always wanted peace and quiet. That’s what you get for pushing everyone away.”

Angel mustered all her power, her hands trying to pry the creature away from her neck. The almost plant-like vine that strangled her refused to budge.

“... W… hy?”

“STOP!” Stanley yelled. He groaned and fought, but he barely made a dent in the creature’s grip. Instead, he fueled its rage.

It growled, “WHY?! I am the walls that muffle your screaming. The empty chair at the table. The tearstained sheets that stay awake as you cry yourself to sleep.” Out of nowhere, its voice softened. “Are you so blind that you no longer realize what it is you desire?”

She could no longer form an answer.

“YOU made this hell. This bed. And you refuse to lie in it.”

Angel started to lose the sensation in her extremities. But even then, she could still feel Stanley thrashing and pulling, fighting tooth and nail, trying to loosen the unknown creature’s hold.

“It’s time you woke the hell up, Kate.”

At that moment, she stopped fighting. Her fingers no longer tried to break from its clutches. She pulled open her blindfold.

When her eyes opened, banishing the darkness that encroached her vision, all she saw was Stanley trying to lift her up. The little boy used all his power to fight against gravity, lifting her up so that the noose stopped suffocating her.

In that moment of lucidity, she realized how selfish it was for her to take her own life. She was all that her son had left.

With what little strength that remained, she grabbed onto the noose, freeing her neck from its hold as she fell onto her bedroom floor with a thud. Her lungs gasped for air. The salt from her sweat stung her eyes. An intense migraine pummeled the inside of her head.

But despite all that, she lived.

“Mom! Mom!” Stanley cried out, hugging her.

“I’m so… so… sorry.” She wept. For the first time in a long while, her tears were no longer dry. She cried her heart out, the guilt of almost abandoning her son tearing away at her insides.

“Don’t die!” He begged. “Don’t leave me!”

“I won’t. I promise.”

“I won’t complain or get angry or do anything bad again, okay? I’ll be a big boy now. Promise me you won’t ever do that again!”

“You did nothing wrong.” She reassured him. “And I promise. I’ll never do anything like that again, you hear?”

“Mhm.” He nodded.

Seeing the brave face he forced himself to put on, even with his puffy cheeks, made her realize how much he had gone through. The hell that she imagined moments earlier might not be real, but the pain he suffered was.

She asked, “Is there anything I can do to make up for scaring you?”

He shook his head. “D-Do you need to go to a hospital?”

“I’m okay now.”

Stanley hugged her once more. His warmth meant everything to her. Though her struggles in life didn’t disappear, they didn’t feel as cold anymore.

Smiling, she admitted. “I’m feeling hungry. How does steak sound?”

Stanley’s eyes lit up. “I’ll help out!”

Their family might be broken, but their spirits have not. In fact, they were stronger than ever.

They had each other.

And that was more than enough.