Loneliness

Tuesday, April 7, 2026 — 6:00 a.m.

My alarm tore me out of my dreams.
Six o’clock.
Again...
For a few seconds, I stayed perfectly still.
Then my hand automatically reached for the eyepatch resting on my bedside table.
My only protection in this unfair world.

After getting dressed, I went downstairs for breakfast.
Mom was already waiting for me, wearing an expression I couldn’t quite read.
Worried, maybe.
Or sad. I didn’t really know
“Hitomi...”
She hesitated.
“Are you really going to keep wearing that eyepatch every day?”
I stared down at my bowl.
I already knew how this conversation went.
And I didn’t have the energy for a war at six in the morning.
“Talk to me if something’s wrong...”
I didn’t even bother answering.
I wolfed down my breakfast and left for school as quickly as I could.

The morning air was pretty chilly, and I hadn’t brought a scarf.
If I got sick... so what?
At least then...
I could disappear for a few days.
No one would really notice I was gone.
The school soon rose into view, as huge as ever.
I’d arrived a little early today.
I’d been in such a hurry to get out of the house.
So I wandered through the empty hallways of the main building, with no one else around.
Paradise.

When I reached the classroom, I noticed someone standing outside.
A fairly cute blonde girl.
What was her name again?
Mikomi...?
No, Mikage. That was it.
She was already here this early.
Why couldn’t I ever just be left alone?
She slowly lifted her eyes.
Our gazes met.
One second.
Two.
For some reason, it felt like time had stopped.
Whatever. I’ll wait somewhere else.
I turned to leave.
“Akane-san?”
I jumped.
...San?
She had really called me that?
Not “the new girl.”
Not “the weird girl.”
Not “the demon”...
“W-What?”
“Don’t forget to sign up for a club if you’re interested in one. Since you’re new, you probably shouldn’t wait too long.”
Why was she telling me that?
It almost sounded like she was talking to me as if I were... normal.
“Why are you telling me that?!”
“I’m the class representative. It’s my job.”
“Oh. Right... Okay.”
I escaped that obvious trap and waited farther down the hall.
A club? For me? Good joke.

Eventually, I made it to my seat at the back of the classroom.
Back here, I felt... safe.
Little by little, the room filled up.
Conversations.
Laughter.
People who seemed to know instinctively where to go, who to sit beside, and what to say.
I simply existed.
And honestly, that described me pretty well.
Even so, I could still feel people looking at me.
I was used to it by now.
A group of girls was talking a few rows ahead.
“Whoa, Hayase-chan! You’re seriously so good at explaining math!”
How ridiculous.
That problem was ridiculously easy.
There was nothing special about Hayase Mikage.
And yet...
I looked up.
Several students had gathered around her.
They were laughing.
It all seemed so... easy.
So natural.
As though talking to other people didn’t take any effort at all.
Akane-san.
The words suddenly came back to me.
My heart gave a strange little thump.
No.
I was thinking way too much.
The lessons were, once again, almost insultingly easy.
Little by little, my eyelids began to droop.

“Miss!”
Something struck the corner of my desk, making me jolt awake.
I had actually fallen asleep.
How humiliating.
I could already imagine the new nickname they’d give me.
“What is your name, young lady?”
“Aka—” I yawned. “Akane Hitomi.”
The class laughed.
Again.
“Akane, since my lesson apparently does not interest you, could you solve the equation on the board?”
He pointed at it with his chalk.
I looked at the equation and blinked.
Wait, that was easy.
The answer was plus or minus the square root of two.
Not much of a punishment.
“I-I...”
I opened my mouth.
Nothing came out.
The numbers on the board were simple.
The eyes fixed on me weren’t.
Damn it.
All those people staring at me.
Stop looking.
Just leave me alone!
I glanced across the classroom.
All I could see was judgment.
And then there was that girl.
Mikage.
Her expression didn’t seem cruel.
Strangely enough...
She wasn’t laughing.
At least...
I didn’t think she was.
“The answer is plus or minus the square root of two, sir.”
He blinked.
“...Correct.”
The class had stopped laughing.
Now the room was filled with an uncomfortable silence.
“Akane, do not let me catch you sleeping in my class again.”
“Yes, sir.”
Whispers spread around the room.
I had probably managed to look like a freak all over again.

Nothing particularly interesting happened after that, and eventually lunchtime arrived.
“Hey! Do you want to come to the cafeteria with us?”
I was never going back there.
Definitely not so I could be humiliated again.
I ignored them and left the classroom as quickly as possible.
The rooftop was off-limits to students, which meant it would have been the perfect place for me.
I pressed down on the handle of the heavy door.
Locked.
Obviously.
Fine.
I’d just find some isolated corner instead.
I sat down somewhere out of the way.
Why wasn’t she laughing...?
Wait…What am I even thinking?
She was probably judging me instead.

The afternoon classes were just as easy—and just as boring—as the morning ones.
I understood the teacher’s explanation within the first few minutes, which left me enough time to finish the exercises before he had even finished explaining them.
So now I had nothing left to do.
I let out a sigh.
My gaze drifted between the window and the classroom.
Most of the students were quietly scribbling through the math problems in their notebooks.
Some asked for help.
Others talked instead of doing their work.
That blonde girl...
She was the same as me.
She had already finished her exercises too.
But unlike me, she was talking to the other students and helping them.
Finishing your work just to do it all over again for someone else...
How ridiculous.

When classes finally ended, I rushed out of that cage as usual.
I passed by the sports field.
It was still crowded.
Shouts.
Cheers.
People who seemed to have a place somewhere.
...
Ridiculous.
And she was there too.
Mikage.
She was probably training with her club.
Seriously, who just stands around watching people run?
...
And yet, I couldn’t look away.
...

“Hitomi? You’re home pretty late.”
“Yeah, I know. Sorry.”
She really could run fast.
And she looked kind of cool doing it.
Her blonde hair swayed with every stride.
She seemed to run without the slightest effort.
How did she have that much energy?
No one was perfect!
“Hitomi, sweetie... Are you okay?”
“Yeah. Don’t worry, Mom. I’m fine.”

After taking a shower and packing my bag for the next day, I collapsed onto my bed.
I stared at the eyepatch lying beside me.
Silence.
My room was finally quiet.
And yet...
“Hahahaha!”
“You filthy demon!”
I closed my eyes.
Still...
One thought refused to leave me alone.
Why wasn’t she laughing?