Chapter 3

As quickly as Kaede had been gripped by the anxiety of a large crowd, she was back to her usual self, humming merrily along as she held a skewer with fried squid in one hand, taking nibbles of it as they walked down the main lane of the matsuri. The layout of the festival had four columns of stands, with various food, games and a myriad of artisans shilling their wares to the passerby. There were gaps in-between some stands to allow for the festival enjoyers to explore the other lanes of booths, trying to keep the crowd dispersed more evenly throughout the event.

Kaede and Gakuto had barely made it past the entranceway when she had found the takoyaki and spent some of Sumire’s money to buy a set for them to split. He had outright refused when there was only one toothpick, so Kaede had happily devoured the fried treats without much complaint.

This matsuri was sponsored by the palace and the Emperor himself, and so there were quite a few villages that had stands set-up making it a much more massive event than Kaede had expected. She had always watched the prep work from the palace walls, so it had always seemed much smaller to her eyes. However, now that she was experiencing it for herself…

“Gakkun, Gakkun, look over there!” Kaede was lost in the wonders of the ordinary.

Gakuto had been remaining vigilant, or rather, trying to, but the constant “Gakkun, Gakkun!” from his left made it really hard for him to focus on being a guard. They passed by a small stand with a trough of water filled with small fish and kids younger than them scooping them into bowls in front of a booth with an old woman selling tea to the other passerby. A woodworker, with a variety of hairpins in different shapes and colors along with kanzashi, had a small crowd of young women debating what to get. It was situated across from a sitting area where some of the adult men from the local villages sat around a table sharing and drinking their local brews.

Gakuto’s eyes darted back and forth from one side to the next as they stepped further into the layout of stalls, before he realized that Kaede had stopped at one of the entertainment booths. He stepped back and saw her unusually focused, on a kid a couple of years younger than herself aiming a toy rifle at a shelf full of assorted wooden toys and dolls. The kid pulled the trigger and hit a kendama that was standing on its hand and it shook before righting itself and both the kid and Kaede let out an exasperated sigh.

“So close!”

“Why won’t it fall!?”

Gakuto let out a sigh and crouched down next to the kid, a boy probably around eleven and held out his hand for the rifle. The boy stared at him for a second before handing it to the young guardsman and Gakuto angled it on his shoulder, closing one eye as he pointed the barrel of the rifle at the same kendama.

Kaede, now standing behind Gakuto but crouched down to see the target from a better angle, raised her fists in a show of pumping him up. “You got this, Gakkun!”

“Go for it, Gakkun!” The kid echoed and Gakuto pulled his focus from aiming to glare at the kid. The kid covered his mouth with both hands before Gakuto returned his focused gaze to the kendama and took a short breath before pulling the trigger, sending a small cork flying at the wooden toy on the shelf. It struck the kendama head on, causing it to teeter back and forth dramatically before flipping off of the shelf and onto the ground.

“Whoa!”

“Wow, Gakkun!”

The twin voices of the kid and Kaede reached his ear along with the sound of some short claps as the vendor retrieved the toy and brought it over to Gakuto, taking the rifle from his hand. Gakuto stared at the kid for a moment before handing the toy over and the young kid ran into the crowd, grasping his new treasure close to his chest before turning and waving at the two from the palace.

Kaede waved back, a soft smile on her face, as Gakuto watched the kid disappear into the forest of people, his mind wandering back to a simpler time when his father had brought him to such a festival. It was still painful to think about his father, even now, four years after…

“That was really cool, Gakkun!” Kaede said, patting the young guardsman on the shoulder before stepping in front of him, that radiant smile of hers bringing him back to the present. “Where did you learn to do that?”

The two of them started shuffling along the path again before turning around the corner of a booth that wasn’t open at the moment, and heading to one of the less busy paths of the event. “My father taught me to do that, when he brought me to a festival a few years back… he was always really good at those types of games and I tried to copy what he did…” His voice trailed off into melancholy once more as Kaede tilted her head to look up at him.

Gakuto stood about a head taller than her now, both of them in their fourteenth year, but she wasn’t quite used to looking up at him yet. They had been more or less the same height since she met him eight years ago, with any growth spurt happening between them never lasting very long until the other caught up. She had a feeling that was over now as they were soon approaching adulthood and she’d be lying if it didn’t bother her a little, giving the feeling that she was being left behind.

Shaking herself out of that thought, Kaede took a few quick steps forward and turned to face him, a wide, mischievous grin on her face as she held up Sumire’s purse and shook it pointedly, allowing the coins inside to make a satisfying clink. “You haven’t eaten anything yet, Gakkun, so let’s grab something tasty at the next food stand!” It came off as a command he couldn’t refuse so he resigned himself to her spending more of her ill-gotten gains.

They quickly found a booth selling shaved ice with a selection of flavors and Kaede ordered and paid for two before they walked a little ways, struggling to eat from the bowls while walking. Gakuto found another area with chairs and benches set up, facing the river and led Kaede over to it, finding them a place to sit and enjoy their frozen treats. Eating in silence, Gakuto stared off at the walls of the palace while Kaede cheerfully downed her yuzu flavored ice, watching people come and go from the rest area as well as a few boats transporting items to various booths along the river.

Gakuto picked at his plum flavored ice before he noticed Kaede was staring at him again, having set her now empty bowl beside her on the bench. She was resting on her hands, her eyes full of questions.

“W-what are you staring at?”

“Are you having fun, Gakkun? You seem to be far away right now.”

“Of course, I’m having fun!” He tried to sound convincing. He was having fun but his mind was also wandering through a lot of things.

Kaede was silent for a few moments, almost as if she was choosing whether or not to believe him, before smiling. “I’m glad. I’m having fun too!” She turned to gaze out at the river, humming slightly before continuing. “There are soooo many more people here than I realized. It’s making me realize how small my world actually is!” She brought her hands together in front of her chest, almost as if she was catching the small web of people she knew. “It’s kind of amazing that so many people can put on a festival like this. Especially with how other people want to fight them…” Her voice trailed off as she gazed out at the walls of the palace.

“Everyone is more complicated than we know.” Gakuto said and Kaede glanced over at him, her eyes wide with surprise at his statement. “You can only really know yourself, at the end of it all. You can never fully understand someone who isn’t yo-...”

“That’s not true!” Kaede said, a bit more excitedly, but with the bustle of the crowd and everyone lost in their own conversations, her louder than usual voice went unnoticed. “I understand Gakkun quite well! And Sumire! And even old Jiro!”

“If master heard you say that, he’d be very upset right now…” Gakuto interjected before Kaede continued.

“Just because everyone is complicated, doesn’t mean that you can’t know or understand them! Even mother…” Her voice trailed off as the image of her strict and stern mother came into her mind’s eye. “...can be understood…”

“The world is as big or small as you allow it to be.” Gakuto said, his gaze looking out over the field beyond the river, as Kaede turned to face him. “You can either keep it so small that you can wrap your arms around it, or let it grow so much that you lose yourself in it. You just can’t let it suffocate you.”

“I wouldn’t lose myself, in a bigger world.” Kaede said, her gaze matching his and he looked at her with surprise. “If anything, I would find myself.” She extended her left hand out, as if reaching towards the horizon. “My world being tiny is suffocating…” Gakuto followed her gaze, seeing it looking beyond the palace.

“I can see how you would feel that way…” He muttered, causing Kaede to gasp.

“I’m not complaining about my life!” She waved her arms in front of her adamantly, turning towards him. “I know how well off I am and how nice it is to know I’m taken care of for the rest of it! I was just thinking how I don’t know that many people, really only everyone in the back palace…”
“It probably wouldn’t be so bad if you could leave the palace more often.” Gakuto replied, mindlessly.

Kaede nodded her head vehemently before returning her gaze out onto the horizon. “It would just be more interesting to see something more than the same stone walls, the same gardens, the same trees every single day…” Her words didn’t seem meant as a reply to him, but as an earnest wish she had held back all this time.

She let out a small giggle, before running her hands along her lap, pushing herself off the bench. “But, it’s fine. I don’t need excitement or adventures.”

Gakuto didn’t fail to notice that her voice and expression didn’t match up.