Prologue - I am a God?

 In the middle of spring, under the luminous sky, my sorrowful friend reached his hand out to me. We grew up together in a lower class town where the land was vandalized and morals were just words. I wanted nothing more than to escape that town. The only value I had was my friend, Carl. Carl had curly hair and round glasses, he was very timid and never shared his thoughts. Which is why I was in disbelief when he asked me to meet up with him in the middle of the town’s park. I can’t remember much of what he told me, just that I was upset and my only thoughts were that I didn’t want to listen anymore. Which is why, even though he was pouring his heart out to me in tears, I can only say one thing.

“I’m sorry, I don’t forgive you.”

I wish I would’ve said anything else.

…

A month later, I found myself at Carl’s funeral. I wasn’t sure if I was welcomed or not, I could hear many people shout at me but an invisible wall stopped me from communicating with anyone else except the concrete stone in front of me. While in a daze, I could only hear one person’s words.

“Why couldn’t you have forgiven him just once?”

Guilt welled up inside of me. I wanted nothing more but to turn back time. I holed myself up in my room for the next several years. Or maybe even decades? I’ve spoken with no one, not even my sister who stayed with me just to make sure I was alive. And that’s why, I was entirely unaware that the outside world was in turmoil.

…

“So that’s all you remember?” A young woman in a black hood that looks no older than twenty-five, with snowy, white hair sticking out and gleaming, silver eyes asked me. I remember falling asleep normally and awakening in this dark space with nothing but a small podium and the woman in it. “What do you remember?” was the first thing she asked me before I had the chance to question her. As if under a spell, I recited everything I remembered. “Is that all? Do you remember anything before? Anything after? How about your name?”

After pondering, I shook my head.

“I see.” The woman nodded as if understanding something and put her hand to her chest. “Then let’s reacquaint ourselves. I am ‘believer’, as I am your loyal and only believer to remain. And you are ‘The Forgiver’ or ‘God of Forgiveness’. Several centuries ago, the world came to an end and rebuilt itself anew. However, the world has only come to an end once more.

“Hold on.” I interrupted. “Nothing is making sense right now. Where am I and why am I here? Have I finally gone insane enough to start lucid dreaming?”

“Sorry to disappoint Forgiver, but you are past the point of being able to dream. You have passed two world times ago and can no longer comprehend such activities. You don’t remember who you are or why you’re here, so if you listen well, I can explain thoroughly to help you finally grasp your current situation.”

Upon looking at her expression, she didn’t seem like she was lying. She looked more desperate than anything. “Fine, the chances are that I’m most likely in a dream or hallucinating but I have time.” I decided to cave. This was the first human interaction I’ve had in years and I was even surprised at myself for being able to hold a conversation with another for this long, whether they were real or fake.

The young woman, known as ‘believer’, removed her hood, revealing pointed ears and delicate facial features. She was almost as white as her hair and looked far from an average human. Was she even human?

“Let me reintroduce myself again,” she started, seriously. “I am ‘believer’, your loyal and only believer to remain. Like you, I don’t remember much outside of my afterlife. You have been the ‘God of Forgiveness’ since the most recent world time, and recently the world has once again come to an end. I have come far and wide to find you and ask one final question.” She took a deep breath and her eyebrows furrowed. “Please forgive the Gods and unite our nation as one!”

What is she saying?! Am I really so narcissistic to dream of such things?

“I’m afraid that I still don’t understand.”

“That’s okay!” She said energetically. “As long as you agree, then everything can return to normal! And once you complete your mission, your memories should come back to you.”

“Okay…” I looked around. There really was nothing but this podium and girl. In a hurry to leave this gloomy area and weird dream I nodded my head. “I agree.”

Tears welled up in the Believer’s eyes as she smiled beamingly. “Thank you.”

The dark room suddenly glowed blindingly. “Huh? What is happening!?” I panicked, looking straight as the snowy, white haired girl. She had her head bowed and her hands clenched together as she slowly looked up and smiled at me.

“My dear Forgiver, please forgive everyone.”

…

“Hel…”

What?

“Are you ther…”

I was just talking to the believer. Why does my body feel so stiff and what’s that sound?

“Hello!”

At the loud noise, I forcefully opened my tired eyes. Above me, a mythical, tan skinned, looking man with galaxy transparent eyes and hair looked down at me.

“You’re awake!” He said enthusiastically while lifting me up with brute force. “I thought I was going to have to wait forever for you to finally wake up.”

I moved my free hand to my head, hoping to subside the growing headache. I looked around to nothing but a wheat-filled area and a huge building far in the distance. After tiredly assessing my situation, I faced the unique looking being in front of me. “What are you?”

“That’s a bit of a rude question.” He frowned. “Wouldn’t the right words be ‘who are you’?”

“Am I still dreaming?” I looked around tiredly until I was suddenly hit in the back of my head with brute force.

“You’re not dreaming!” The galaxy themed man looked down on me again while shaking his hand, except this time, he looked at me with disgust. “Gosh. You kept saying the same thing to the believer as well.”

With the aching pain in the back of my head, I could only think that this was a very vivid dream. But I decided to listen carefully to not get another hit to my head. “So you’re with the believer then? Then do you care to explain my situation now?”

“Still as rude as ever! I guess losing your memory doesn’t change much.” He shrugged. “I am Astral, the first and only God you’ve ever forgiven; hence my awkward appearance.”

“Only God I’ve forgiven?” I sneered. “We're still going with this plot are we?”

“Well, of course! You are the ‘God of Forgiveness’ after all!”

“And you’re the God of?”

“The ‘God of the Universe’!” Astral stood proudly. “However, unlike you and the other Gods, I have no believers. Which is why I was the easiest to forgive.” Even though they were his own words, Astral ended up looking dejected. “But enough of me! You don’t remember a single thing about yourself which we might find to be an issue much later on!”

Astral raised his hand and swiped the air in front of him. Suddenly, a mirror appeared in front of me, revealing dark brown hair and tan skin. I had masculine features and semi-thin eyes. Huh? I looked over at Astral and compared both of our appearances. “Aren’t I a God too?” I asked him. “Why do I look so plain?”

“Correction. Only you think you look plain.” Astral insisted. “To everyone else, your appearance is especially unique. But to your eyes, everyone else’s appearances change to fit yours. For example, I actually take the appearance of a star, but since you are the only God remaining, my form can no longer take that appearance. Now my actual look is that of a spec of bright light.”

With a disappointed look, I gazed back at the mirror. I look like just any other human.

“Before you died, you lived in the U.S., a part of the lower class.” He said as if understanding my confusion. “You never cared much about dramatic looks and unfortunately, we can only give you your appearance from the time of your memories.” Astral then sighed. “Trust me, this is awkward for both of us. I remember you as a grumpy old man.”

I scowled at him. “Aren’t we both old?”

“Yes, but no one looked as old as you did.” He smirked.

“Oh, really?” I tilted my head, while beaming an unhappy eye smile. “I wonder if I can unforgive you right here and now.”

Astral shuddered. “Although I doubt you remember how to do that, let’s not try it. Remember that your mission is to forgive every God!”

So if I figure out how to unforgive others then the power is in the palm of my hand? “Alright, then how do I forgive other Gods?”

“Oh, right!” Astral swiped the air once more and a screen-like window appeared in front of me. “Other than both you and me, there are five other Gods to forgive and unite before the world comes to an end once more. Currently, we have turned back time to before any of the Gods have committed any sins. When the time comes, the ability to forgive should come naturally.”

“How far back in time are we talking?”

Astral shook his head. “Time is confusing in the afterlife. We just have to trust that your abilities brought us to the right time in history to stop any regretful events.”

I scoffed. “Well that’s helpful. How am I supposed to know what to prevent or forgive if I don’t have any context on what happened?”

“That’s why I mentioned that losing your memory doesn’t do any good for us.” Astral looked around. “For now, we just have to get you more believers for your abilities to return.”

Abilities? Now that I think about it… “I’m a God, aren’t I? Doesn’t that mean I can control the world or at least be somewhat overpowered?”

“In a way, yes.” Astral sighed. “But after some time… Or in a worldtime of time, you’ve lost almost all of your believers. This strained your position as a God and as a result, lost your abilities along with practically all of your memories.”

“So I’m basically a normal person right now?”

“Yes, but only you have the ability to forgive a God and your position as a God still stands.”

I couldn’t believe it. How did they expect me to go around as ‘God of Forgiveness’ if I was just an average human?! Wait.

I looked up at the screen-like, transparent floating object in front of me. “Am I allowed to do at least this much?”

“Huh? Of course not!” Astral scoffed mockingly.

“But I thought you had no believers?” I glared at him. He had to be lying. Maybe he just didn’t want to tell me how to use my abilities or he’d be useless. Or maybe as soon as I find out, I can easily unforgive him? “If you’re lying, just fess up! I promise I won’t unforgive you.”

“Well, it is true that unlike you I have no believers.” Astral put two arms on the back of his head. “I have my abilities thanks to the other Gods believing in me.”

The window in front of me changed. The number six appeared in a glowing, blinding color. “What is this?”

“This is my believer count.” He smirked. “I am believed in by all the Gods, so even I can do this much.”

“So that’s how it works? How many believers do I have?” Suddenly, the number two appeared in a greenish color. “Is this mine?”

“Yep.”

“Why does it say I have two? I thought the believer was my only remaining believer.”

Astral face turned smug. “That’s because I’m also your believer! It just doesn’t count since I’m a God and I’m not loyal.”

I stared dumbfoundedly. Is this guy really my believer? He acts more like an anti-fan. “How come you’re believed in by the other Gods but I just have you?”

“Think about this.” Glasses appeared on Astral’s face. Is he trying to look smart? “I watch over the universe. One of the biggest issues in history is Asteroids. Other Gods would want me to watch over the universe to make sure no Asteroids would cause them any harm. Their people would think their own Gods are what are protecting them from any of the universe's harm so the other Gods pray to me.”

Makes sense.

“Well now that you understand!” He continued. “Shall we get started?” His long arm pointed to the only building in sight.

After walking for a while, the text on the building could be clearly read ‘Empty Town Train Station’. “A train station?” I looked over at Astral. “Did I have to spawn in the incorrect area?”

“No, this was on purpose.” Astral shrugged. “Before you even meet the other Gods, you have to communicate with others to gain believers. We went over this.”

“But why at a train station?”

“No one but you with your memories knows.”

What on earth was the old me thinking?

Upon entering the train station, only a few benches stood. On one of the benches, an older girl with two younger kids, one boy and girl, sat. I felt a shove from behind. Turning back to scold Astral, only a glowing, bright orb remained.

“Astral?”

“I’m here!” The familiar voice was heard from the orb. “For most of our mission, I’ll appear as this mini, glowing star. Since this is how others see me, I thought it’d be easier for you to see me as this appearance in front of others.”

Seriously.

“Um, excuse me sir.” I turned around at the high-pitched sound behind me. The smaller girl with long, straight black hair looked up at me. “Are you also here to board the train?”

I paused. I forgot how long it’s been since I actually communicated with another person. I was talking to the believer and Astral just as easily as drinking water so why did I only realize that it’d be hard to communicate with others now.

The transparent window appeared in front of me again. This time, with a picture of the girl with wolf ears. I swiped the screen and then her appearance turned into a unique wolf-like creature. The text next to it said as follows: “Remember that appearances change according to species. To them, you look just like them! The first slide is their actual appearance, and the second slide is the appearance you'd like them in! - Astral”

So it’s not another human.

If I look at the small girl in front of me as a small pup then it shouldn’t be an issue. Unconsciously, I moved the window in front of the girl’s face and smiled. “Yes, that is correct. Do you know when the train will arrive?”

“It should arrive soon!” The girl smiled back. “Would you like to sit with us sir?”

“Say yes!” Astral said excitedly. “You could get believers this way! Don’t forget to mention that you are ‘The Forgiver’!”

I’m supposed to tell them?

The girl grabbed my hand and brought me over to the other two. I immediately put the window filter in front of them and sat next to the small girl.

“This is my older sister Dernica and my younger brother Jenica.” She then pointed to herself. “I am Anica! We’ve been waiting for the train for several years!”

“Several… Years?” I tilted my head with confusion. What did she mean?

“We’re the only people in Empty Town.” Dernica interrupted. “The rule for the train is that there must be at least four people to board the train. So everyday, we’ve been visiting the train station in hopes that one more person would finally show up so we can escape this place.”

A weird feeling of deja vu welled up inside me. From my memories, the only thing I’ve seemed to ever want was to leave my town. “I think I understand that feeling. But how did you three pups end up in this situation?”

“Pups?”

“I mean kids.”

“You don’t look that much older than me.” Dernica said. “How’d you end up here as well?”

Right. I forgot that my appearance is when I had my memories. So I should look between eighteen or twenty. “I travelled too far.” In time. “And I seemed to have gotten lost.”

The three pups gave confused glances at each other before looking back at me. Did my answer seem too vague?

Dernica raised her hand to her chest. “Us three were brought here by our parents. They escaped their old homeland with us, but unfortunately, they passed five years ago. Since I am still young and unknowledgeable, I hope to take my younger siblings somewhere they can grow and live well. Which is why I hoped for someone like you to be at the train station.”

“I’m confused. If you have enough food and water to live well, why haven’t you tried walking out of this town on your own?”

Amidst my confusion, the train appeared in front of us. Where’d the train even come from? I didn’t see it nor hear it.

The three kids got up from the bench and walked inside the train as soon as the doors opened. I followed behind. The train doors dramatically shut as soon as I walked inside. The small boy, Jenica, grabbed my hand and led me to sit beside him, across from his sisters.

There was no one else on the train.

I looked outside as the train started moving. But instead of going forward, the train seemed to be going upwards? Outside the window, the wheat filled land came to a stop. Was the Empty Town a floating island?

“Now you understand why we couldn’t just escape?” Dernica said with her palm on her chin. “Which is why we’re confused about who you are.”

I nodded as if realizing something. “I’m unsure if you’ve heard of me, but I am known as ‘The God of Forgiveness’ or ‘The Forgiver’ for short.”

“The Forgiver?” Dernica said in a shocked tone. Her head raised and eyes widened. “I thought that was just a myth. Also wasn’t ‘The Forgiver’…”

So I’m famous? “Yes, I am ‘The Forgiver’. I woke up at the Empty Town to find believers while also figuring out my current situation.”

“Figuring out your current situation?” Janica, the boy, finally spoke while tilting his head.

I nodded. “Although I’ve woken up with the title ‘The Forgiver’, I don’t seem to remember much of anything.”

The two younger kids looked at me as if I was saying something impressive while the older one looked at me as if I was crazy. She sat up and grabbed the two younger ones. “It seems you still have a lot to figure out on your own. I’ll sit with my siblings somewhere else so you have time to figure yourself out.” She bowed her head. “Once you give us an actual answer of who you are, please let us know.”

Huh?

Dernica pulled both of the younger ones to the other end of the train cart. Janica and Anica looked back at me with sullen expressions. What happened?

Astral’s light appeared before me once more. “She thinks you’ve lost it.”

“You’re the one who told me to tell them that I was ‘The Forgiver’!”

“Yes, but I didn’t tell you to tell them that you lost your memories!” Astral sighed. “That girl is smart though. She thinks you’re using imaginary tactics to lure them into doing something.”

“But don’t I look as young as her? Why would I do something like that?”

Astral turned back to his normal appearance across from me and shrugged. “I don’t know. I guess years without other interactions causes one to be cautious.”

Eventually, the train landed on another floating island. Dozens of other people entered the train. I quickly put a filter over them but they weren’t all the same species anymore. Uncomfortable, I removed the filter and hid my face with my hands while Astral turned back into his light appearance.

Amongst the people, one person sat across from me with a bike uniform and helmet. That’s a fashion style from my time. Although curious, their familiar wardrobe only made me more uncomfortable.

After bowing my head for a while, I found myself dozing off.

…

“Warning! Warning!”

I quickly opened my eyes to a loud obnoxious sound.

“Warning! Warning!”

A robotic voice was heard from the train intercoms.

I looked around, the biker dressed person across from me disappeared. Behind me, the other people and three siblings still remained. Suddenly the train's cart door opened, revealing the biker dressed person once more.

“Warning! Warning!”

“Boom!”

The train cart shook and an explosive sound could be heard from another cart. I fell to the floor and looked up. The biker dressed person held a button up above his head.

“Listen here.” The biker dressed person spoke in an androgynous voice. “Everyone stay seated or else I will press this button. One of the other train carts has already exploded. I’m guessing you don’t want the same thing to happen to you?”

Just what kind of situation have I found myself in?