Survival of the Monstrous

I've been walking for a little more than a week now. I managed to reach the forest by the end of the second day, but have yet to find anything to eat.

The only thing keeping me sustained was the river water, but I noticed it made my stomach lurch in agony whenever I drank it. I wasn't sure why, though, since it looked okay to drink. But I still drank it anyway, knowing I felt much worse whenever I hadn't.

Then there was the forest. Once I had entered its confines, I could feel it, the gaze of animals crawling through my skin, watching my every move behind almost every tree. For a few days, I couldn't even get more than an hour or two worth of sleep before I felt like something was approaching me, which I found strange, since animals were normally afraid of me.

I figured it could only mean one thing; there were creatures lurking in the forest that had no reason to fear me. Just the thought of that gave me goosebumps, keeping me constantly on egde. I had no choice but to keep a look out until the feeling of being watched went way. 

And now, here I am, a little more than a week into my journey, trudging along best I can, my body feeling dirty despite using the river to bathe. Not to mention my stomach's constant growling keeping me from having a moment of silence.

I felt like this was it, that my story was already close to ending. The tragic tale of Abel ends here as he dies in the woods--hungry, alone, and smelly.

That's when I heard the sound of shrieking coming from the forest. Usually I'd hide, just in case, but my curiosity got the better of me. As I got closer, the shrieking only grew louder, now accompanied with sounds of growling. 

The more I listened, the more both became recognizable. The shrieking must have been from one of the smaller critters my dad used to catch. A rabbit, I think he called it? And the growls... yeah, there's no mistaking it. They came from that of a wolf, probably feasting on it.

Knowing there might be a wolf nearby, I decided it was best if I just head back. But before I could, my eyes finally spotted where they were. They weren't too far, just a bit deeper into the woods. 

As I got a better look, I turned out to be right, seeing the wolf eating a rabbit, which had now gone silent. Thinking it was a good time as any to get away, I heard something small approaching, its small, quick steps rustling through the grass as it ran.

My head immediately turned, only to see another frightened rabbit fleeing in my direction. Right as it was about to pass me, time felt like it slowed down, my mouth watering like I was looking at one of the most delicious meals in my life.

The rabbit immediately stopped in its tracks, its head turning quickly to see what caused its instincts to kick in. But it was already too late, as a beast it's never seen in its short life plunged at it, its large, human-like hands holding it down as its maw took a massive bite out of it.

Just like the other, it, too, shrieked in pain, but its wails were silenced even faster than its brethren, as the beast did in seconds what took the wolf several minutes to do. A few bites later and the rabbit was no more, leaving behind mostly bone and fur.

The beast, now sated, slowly started turning back. Back into the person it was before. Back into me. I looked down at the bloody remains of the rabbit I saw just moments ago, with the taste of blood and the feel of fur lingering in my mouth. An almost familiar taste, even. I almost wanted to vomit knowing what I just did, but I knew I shouldn't, as this was the first time in days where my stomach wasn't screaming at me to eat.

I wasn't happy about it, but I had found a way to survive, whether I liked it or not. Knowing what I was capable of was a bit too much for me to take in, though, and the taste of blood wasn't helping. I headed back to the river to rinse the blood out of my mouth. Maybe that would clear up my head a bit.

After cleaning out my mouth, and other parts that had blood on them, I decided it was about time to keep going. Conflict plagued my mind as I thought about whether I even should head back home, considering what I am. But another part of me was desperate see my family again, and the only way that was happening was making it back in one piece.

I'll make it back, I promise...

***

Since the day of my first 'hunt', I managed to stave off my hunger. But it wasn't like I was at full control of it, either. Turning it off and on wasn't exactly like a switch, and it really only came out when I was starving, meaning I only ate about every third or fourth day. That being said, I had an inkling of an idea on how to force it out, but it wasn't always a guarantee.

I had lost track of time entirely by this point, the days and weeks blurring together. But time still has a way of letting you know it was passing, as the warm days were now turning cool along with the river's water. This only meant winter would be coming soon, which would probably mark the end my journey, since I doubt even I could survive such cold conditions.

I did manage to make some progress, finding the spot where we had set up camp, the logs Dad set up for us to sit still in their spots. Unfortunately, though, there was no sign of anyone near. Not only that, this also meant I couldn't follow the river's path anymore, as the way back home was definitely away from it. Finding the clearing raised my morale, at the very least.

The first thing I did after finding our old campsite was look for the dirt trail we had traveled on, only to find nothing of the sort. The memories of that day were not as clear as they once were, but I do remember my father traveling for quite some time in the dark. Perhaps he got off the beaten path at some point to make it to the clearing? If I was sitting in the front seat with them, maybe I would have had a better idea of how we got here.

But because of such circumstances, I am now here in my current predicament, wandering aimlessly through the woods, day after day, looking for the right way out of here. If I found the entrance we came from, I could make it home for sure. That's when a cold breeze hit my body. Just how much time has passed for it to get this cold?

That's when I heard something familiar nearby. By sheer luck, I had found my next meal; a rabbit enjoying its own dinner as it grazed on some grass, having yet to notice my presence. I learned by trial and error that if I wanted to capture my prey, I'd have to either get lucky, or turn before they caught sight of me. If I failed to do that, then they would just run before I had a chance to go after them.

Okay, Abel, you can do this! Just think bad thoughts, c'mon. This was the only way I knew how to bring out the monster within. Starvation definitely helped, but thoughts and feelings of frustration and anger helped me get over the edge, at least of my own accord. If I couldn't harbor enough, though, the transformation just didn't happen, or sometimes only an arm or leg would change before returning to normal shortly after.

I mustered up the frustration and anger I've accumulated from not being able to find the trail out of here, as well as from not eating in a while. It wasn't long until the world went dark, a sign I was in my beastly form. That's when I saw it, the grey glowing strings that made up a shape of a rabbit who, by the looks of its movement, was still blissfully unaware of its fate.

Gathering all my strength, I pushed off my feet and plunged a great length. The rabbit's shape move like it turned its head towards me, but just like many times before, it was too late. I devoured it as I usually did, avoiding harder parts like bones and teeth. Considering the after taste, I was glad I ate so quickly, not having to deal with that flavor for too long.

Finished with my meal, I felt myself turning back, as always. But as I was wiping the blood off my mouth, I heard a small rustle come from my left. Another rabbit? I thought, finding it weird it hadn't fled yet. But it was no rabbit.

Before me was a blonde-haired woman, crouched behind the undergrowth near a tree. Her face was looking straight at me, her eyes wide with shock and terror. Even in the dim forest, I could tell she had the same look of horror my mother had when I had my episodes at home. Despite this, I needed help, and she was the first person I've met in who knows how long.

"Um--" I tried asking as I approached her, but was immediately cut off by her screams.

"Get away!" she shrieked, clumsily putting her underwear back on as she ran off. Desperate, I chased after her, hoping she would hear me out, and hopefully help me get back home.

"Wait, please! I need help!" I yelled at her, running as fast as I could. It wasn't long 'til we reached a clearing. The sudden brightness from the lack of trees blinded me for a second, causing me to stop until my eyes readjusted. As my vision returned, before me was not just one, but four people, all of which were looking right back at me.

Was I... finally saved?