Never Let Your Ambitious Lover Cook

Bea led the Duchess Marnie to her castle’s library and cleared it out of all her servants. She needed to be sure there weren’t any witnesses if things went wrong (or very, very right). With a wide selection of painting supplies already arranged on one of the reading tables, she turned to Marnie.

“What kinds of things do you normally paint?” asked Bea.

“I enjoy architecture.” Marnie waved her hand. A painted canvas appeared by her shoulder of a majestic cathedral. Bea recognized it; she’d ordered it built a few rulers ago when she was still playing Fantasy Realms. “I am afraid I’m quite poor at trying to paint people.”

“I’m sure you can’t be that bad.”

Marnie waved her hand again. The canvas of the cathedral was replaced by a self-portrait that Bea thought was done by a kindergartener with their fingers.

“Oh.” That ‘oh’ had layers, unlike that painting. Because Bea saw an event pop up once she reacted to it.

----

“I’m afraid I’m quite poor at trying to paint people.”

Duchess Marnie admits her painting skill, while surpassing yours, is limited.

> [Advise her to try and paint your own castle.]
> [Offer one of your servants to pose for her to learn how to paint better.]
> [Offer yourself to help her ‘learn’ the finer points of the human body.] (This option will reduce your Stress because you have the Lustful trait.)

-----

Bea had seen this event a few times before so she knew this was coming.

“Perhaps what you need is a good model to learn off~”

Marnie tapped her chin. “Perhaps. These are some fine paints you have on offer, I – I beg your pardon, Bea! What are you doing!”

Bea had already stripped down to her corset and bottoms. The sheer stockings were a nice touch. She had been deeply disturbed when she found that most of her dresses could be ripped off of her with a single hand. Like she was some quick-change artist.

“You need to learn how to appreciate the female form,” said Bea. “Have you never had someone pose for you before?”

Marnie’s face was as red as the wine she’d had the previous night. “N-Not like this!”

“Then you can get a private lesson.” Bea put her hand on her hip to mimic what she remembered in fashion magazines. It looked like it was working. Marnie was breathing so hard that Bea swore she could see it. If Marnie wore glasses they’d have fogged up already.

Marnie tugged at the collar of her dress and kept going.

“Be sure to pay attention to the curves~” teased Bea.

Marnie tugged harder.

After an hour, Marnie shakily put down her paintbrush and wiped her forehead. Bea circled around to look at her work. “It’s a lot better. You put a lot of detail into my corset.” She draped her arms around Marnie’s shoulders. “I heard artists put their focus on their favorite parts to paint.”

“E-Enough!” Marnie held up a hand. Bea found herself thrown against one of the bookshelves and watched as the elvish duchess wobbled over. Her knees nearly knocked together as Marnie could not restrain herself. “My mother told me humans were little more than lecherous little lickspittles! She was right! You all want nothing more than to seduce anything with half a brain!”

This would be hot if Bea wasn’t worried she’d screwed up.

Marnie rose up on the tips of her toes and planted her lips on Bea’s. “I was hoping she was right.”

What the…?! Lustful wasn’t one of Marnie’s traits when she looked at her character screen! Bea double-checked to be sure. It took her a bit to figure out what had happened.

In the game, elvish society was prudish when it came to intimacy. Doubly so when it involved persons of the same gender. Marnie’s Stress was completely maxed out as a result. She was going through a negative event from maxing it.

Bea wasn’t about to say no to this. But she needed to walk on eggshells if she wanted to ensure Marnie didn’t pick up a trait that would hurt in the long run. She put her hand on Marnie’s back and ran up and down her back. “It’s ok. It’s ok.”

Marnie’s desperation was making her wheeze. “I… I need…”

“Shhhhh.” Bea kissed Marnie on the cheek. “Let me give you a proper lesson on appreciating the female form.”

-----

It was not until it was nearly dinner that Marnie was finally calmed down. Bea’s lessons had to be gentle. As she quickly learned, Marnie had been very touch-starved. The slightest brush of her fingers was enough to make the elf whimper.

Bea tucked the slumbering Marnie into her own bed and got dressed again in some more casual clothes. She stepped out into the halls and checked her own character screen. Marnie was now listed as one of her Lovers. That came with an added bonus.

One of the perks of actively trying to seduce Gallorna and Marnie was that her own Stress had almost bottomed out. Which was good.

“Hello there.”

And it just shot up a few points. “F-Felicia!” In her quest to seduce the other rulers, she had left her Court Magician to her own devices. That was a dangerous thing to do for an Ambitious character…

“I see you’ve been busy,” said Felicia. Her white ears were peeled back and her tail still. “I have no issue with it, though I am concerned how it will impact relations with our neighbors once Gallorna finds out what you’ve done.”

Right. The part where Gallorna and Marnie were rivals. This wasn’t going to work if they remained that way. Bea could try to lie; she had the Intrigue score to pull it off. But that wasn’t a good way to keep a relationship going.

“You’re right. I need your help,” Bea admitted. “I need to straighten this out before we hold the coronation and they go home. The last thing we need is for my libido to help cause a war with both our neighbors.”

Felicia nodded. “I… may be able to help smooth this out. But I’ll warn you, your majesty. If I pull this off, I will be calling in every favor that you’ve ever owed me.”

What kind of favors was she talking about? It was times like these that Bea wished she’d paid more attention to her current character before rage-quitting her fail-save. But there was no going back now. “I accept.”

That made Felicia’s tail start to wag.

“Proceed with the rest of your preparations.” The tail started to lightly rap against Bea’s rear with each wag. “I’ll let you know what happens.”

<You have discovered your lover is plotting against Warchief Gallorna and Duchess Marnie.>

Oh dear. What had Bea gotten herself into this time?

----

It was the night before the coronation when Bea saw a slip of parchment slid her the door to her bedroom. It was in Felicia’s handwriting with clear instructions: come to her quarters at once.

Sneaking her way through the castle was child’s play. Bea’s character knew the halls by heart. Her Skullduggery score likely helped ensure she was not caught by her guards. It was a brisk journey down the stairs and to Felicia’s door, where she could hear some voices speak.

“…the wounds will heal shortly,” Felicia told whoever else was in the room. “Now, it is important all of us pour our spilt blood into the flask at the same time. And… now!”

Bea waited until she could hear the sounds of pouring liquids pass. Then after another minute, she heard Felicia add, “We will all feel some…strangeness over the next half hour. Nothing unpleasant but it will be intense. We’re all agreed on this?”

“Let’s get this done.” “Y-Yes.” Bea heard Gallorna and Marnie’s voices. She finally entered Felicia’s chambers, where she saw Felicia, Gallorna, and Marnie all drinking a blue liquid from their cups in a single gulp.

“Ah. The woman of the night.” Felicia smiled. “You’ll be happy to know I’ve ensured that both of these lovely ladies have been made aware of our situation, and have agreed to set things aside with one another. With some conditions.”

Oh good. Bea had been worried Felicia’s plot was going to involve more exploding manure bombs. The conditions she mentioned were concerning, however. “Go on.”

“As my lady is aware, you are the last living member of your bloodline. You must secure an heir for the future of the realm. We –” Felicia gestured between herself and the others. “ – have come to an arrangement. One that will ensure not just the future of our Kingdom, but of their own holdings.” She began to pant.

Marnie coughed to interrupt. “We needed a way to ensure that none of us could claim sole parentage over the offspring.”

“Yeah,” Gallorna said through grit teeth. “And then the dog decided to complicate things at the last moment.”

Felicia growled playfully. “Here are my terms, Bea. I have created a potion to ensure that you produce an heir that can trace their parentage through all three of you. That will give you all political cover to remain in close proximity and placate your vassals. In exchange…” Her tail was now wagging non-stop. “That child will also be of my blood.” She slid a vial of red liquid across the table to Bea. “Drink up. You’ll need it.”

The concoction Felicia had given Bea smelt of concentrated energy drinks mixed with chocolate.

Bea saw an event pop-up, but didn’t need to bother reading it. Rejecting this almost certainly would give her enough Stress to suffer an immediate negative event. Even with all of the seduction she’d been doing to minimize it.

She shut her nose, closed her eyes, and downed the crimson elixir in a single gulp.

----

Bea was thankful that she had to spend the coronation either sitting on the throne or on her knees. Because trying to walk anywhere after all of that the previous night was not happening. She was unsure how Felicia had come up with the idea but she could tell the women didn’t regret any bit of it.

There was one question that Bea had asked Felicia as everyone helped her get dressed for this: what if it didn’t take?

Felicia grinned and told her that they would do it as many times as it took.

The corner of Bea’s mouth quivered with anticipation. They’d have five years to make this work. But if it did?

She could consider this fail-save run saved.