The Eternal Phoenix & The Dreams

"Marin! Come back Marin! Marin! Mari! .. Mari, wake up."

I felt a warm and gentle hand on my shoulder before my eyes fluttered open. I was looking up at The Eternal Phoenix, her glowing orange eyes gazing down at me, with a small smile spreading across her face.

"There you are. Welcome back to the waking world. How do you feel?" She asked gently.

I took a moment to look around, taking in my surroundings helped me to centre myself.. "N-Nauseous.. tired. Really tired."

"As expected, you used nearly all of your mana keeping up with me. I'm sorry, I tried my best to hold back, but it wasn't quite enough.." For some reason hearing her apologize hurt.

I looked down at myself, taking stock of how I was doing. I wasn't bleeding, didn't seem to be physically hurt at all, my wrist was glowing.. everything seemed normal.

"Wait, why is my wrist glowing, Miss Phoenix?"

"Ah, that would be the spells. You should find that mana flows through your body with greater ease than before. You won't need to eat quite as often, and it should prevent you from depleting all of your mana. Oh, and please, call me Anare. I have more than enough people calling me The Eternal Phoenix or any number of permutations.." She stated with a small sigh. 

"Ah, y-yes Miss Anare!" I managed to stammer out, suddenly finding my strength again as my hands flew up to cover my quickly flushing cheeks. Then I saw it properly. My wrist wasn't just glowing; there were symbols flowing just under my skin, constantly churning and rotating as they adapted to my mana. My focus itself looked wholly different. What had previously been a somewhat simple silver band was now intricately carved with microscopic sigils throughout it, and the sapphire set into it.. the way the light played through the facets of the gem made me think of snow falling gently. "This.. this is beautiful, Miss Anare.."

"Well thank you. It's not often my work is called beautiful." She said with a slight laugh, returning with a small glass of water and handing it to me. "Now then. There's a lot of work ahead of us, including making sure you never burn yourself out like that again. I'll write out a proper schedule before morning, which I will keep on the pinboard outside your room. You'll also find your tasks for the day there; most will just be regular errands, so rest assured that they won't be beyond what you're capable of."

As she spoke I couldn't help but stare at her eyes. By this point I was used to the fact that they were so bright they glowed, but I hadn't noticed before that as her gaze moved, her eyes sparkled like they were filled with the embers from a campfire, or how the bright orange colouring faded to a soft pink at the edges of her irises. With every new thing I noticed about her, it only solidified this feeling that she was a goddess walking the earth.

"..three times a week. On top of that you'll be focusing on your physical fitness as well; mana capacity benefits from physical aptitude, and reaction speeds are very important." She stopped for a moment, noticing what must have been my bewildered look. "Ah, but.. perhaps this is too much to say all at once. Take a bit more time to recover, make sure you finish that whole glass, and join me in the dining hall when you're hungry."

With that, she stood and walked out of the room, leaving me in a strangely comfortable silence. Finishing what was left of the water I set the glass to the side, then rested my head on the arm of the sofa. I hadn't known a silence like this since before the academy. While I was there, something was always happening. Students talking amongst themselves, the sound of spells going off in the training grounds, constant footsteps as people rushed from class to class. I'd grown so used to the noise it faded into the background. Now, it seemed like I was being gently embraced by silence.

I managed two minutes in that silence, before it became too much to handle. I hopped off the couch as quickly as I could, ignoring the rush of dizziness from standing up too fast as I quickly marched to the dining hall.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

Dinner had been quiet. Miss Anare seemed quite busy with her spells, as even while she ate she was writing sigils in the air, then into a tome thicker than my torso, over and over. I didn't mind though, it was enough to simply hear the tapping of metal against ceramic, and the occasional sound of a folding page. After we had finished eating, she showed me to my room.

"Here's where you'll be staying. I apologize for the somewhat sparse nature of it, but I felt it'd be better filled with things that bring you happiness." She said as she opened the door for me.

I was immediately taken aback. The room was huge, maybe even the size of the common room at the academy. At the opposite end was a gigantic rounded window, and to the right of the room sat what seemed to be a hand-carved four-poster bed, with the thickest mattress I'd ever seen before. At the foot of it was a beautiful wooden chest with a lock and key sitting on top of it, and along the opposite wall a large wardrobe stood.

"S-Sparse?! This is the room of a princess!" I shouted, unable to contain my amazement of it all.

I heard her laughing softly from behind, "The room of a princess would be far more luxurious than this, but I'm glad to hear you like the arrangement. I'll leave you to get settled in, but we start at dawn, so don't neglect your rest."

"Yes, Miss Anare. Thank you again, truly. See you in the morning!"

Again she gave me that soft smile, making the room feel just a little brighter than it already was, before she stepped out and closed the door behind her. I took in a deep breath and steadied myself, then set about to unpacking. I didn't own much, so it didn't take terribly long. A few different types of academy uniforms for the different seasons, clothes my mother had sewn for me before I left, and all of my study materials. Most important of all though was my certificate of completion from the academy. My mother even had it framed. It was the one thing that proved I deserved to be here.

Sleep came easily, probably because I was still exhausted from that mana burnout, but despite all my excitement and nerves for tomorrow, I fell asleep quickly.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

"Kagayama-san, this is the fifth test you've failed this semester, I can't keep letting it slide!"

I winced. It wasn't that I wasn't trying, I just couldn't wrap my head around such a complex subject. Even with a personal tutor teaching me five days a week I hadn't managed to pass a single test, and this class was a huge part of my overall grade.

"I'm sorry, Kagayama-san. I recommend that you drop my class, and perhaps even re-evaluate your degree." Yashiki-Sensei was blunt, but she really seemed to care about how much I had been struggling. "You're a very smart woman, Kagayama-san, you just need to find something that fits your strengths."

I couldn't find words. I simply took the latest symbol of my failures, and left. It was another in a seemingly endless line, and I thought I'd be used to it by now, but every new addition to the pile seemed to just weigh me down more and more. I rushed to my dorm. I knew I'd be able to keep it in long enough to at least make it to my bed, and there I could let it all out.

It was all becoming too much to bear.