The intruder of my fortress

The school bell rang followed by loud chatter and the scratching of chairs. As always, Ayaka remained seated in her spot, waiting for everyone to leave.

What a harsh day… It’s always the same. Day in day out the same faces, the same things to do… Well, not exactly right. Katou-sensei’s lessons are different. Can’t say if good or bad. He looks always so… sad.

She tore her gaze from the window and glimpsed inside her bag, the stains of ink still visible, to make sure she didn’t forget a certain book. As a routine, while everyone else is attending a club, she went to the library. A few weeks ago, she received her long-awaited book about black holes and dark matter.

She almost squealed of excitement.

I can’t wait to continue! I am almost halfway through it yet. Still have much left to read.

Her toes kept tapping. She didn’t even notice the small rhythm of joy. She looked outside the window, hoping to dodge her classmates’ eyes.

What she couldn’t escape was the deafening chatter and banter around her. Laughter, snickering and some of the boys made really bad jokes. Some even forced their reactions.

It took about ten minutes until the silence settled and the last person left the class. Ayaka was now alone.

Nothing new but still curse and blessing at the same time.

The sun stretched the shadows, its orange hue bathing the room in a dusty glow. Particles drifted through the air, swirling around her face that was half lit, half shadowed. She narrowed her eyes, trying to make sense of what the light allowed her to see.

Time to go. I can’t wait.

She threw everything left on her desk inside her bag, swung it over her shoulder and left with quick steps. Some students were still in the hallway, chatting or meeting up with their club mates. Ayaka kept her eyes down. She didn’t have to look where she was going. Even blindfolded, she would still find the way to the library because she went there nearly every day.

A light and smooth rattling and the door opened, just do be greeted by a familiar face. The librarian sat behind the counter and greeted with a warm smile.

“Ah! Ayaka-chan, it’s good to see you again.”

“Good day, Takimoto-san,” replied Ayaka with a thin smile, bowing slightly.

Ayaka went straight to the open book laying on the counter to write down her name in the visitor section.

“It’s fine! I already put your name on it,” commented Takimoto Fumi, winking with her left eye, “Would be rare for you no to come here.”

She is just such a nice lady. I… wish I could have a grandma like her.

“Oh, thank you very much!”

“You know, as my husband always said: There’re no heroes needed in this world. Just be nice to the people around you.”

On Takimoto’s face spread a big smile, but her eyes didn’t. They were filled with sadness and nostalgia.

“He sounds like a very wise man,” Ayaka said with a calm voice.

“He was, yes…” a faint whisper, hardly noticeable. A fleeting echo of sadness and memories.

Ayaka widened her eyes, unsure of what to say. Her fingers grabbed her bag a little harder than before.

“I’m… very sorry.”

Oh no! I didn’t know. Urgh. Ayaka, why do you have to say stuff like that?

“Don’t worry! I never told you in the first place. No hard feelings,” she said reassuringly and her gentle smile reappeared, “Want some tee? I’ll make one.”

She turned around and turned on the kettle, that was in a little corner of the counter. It seemed well hidden.

Ayaka raised an eyebrow but said nothing.

“Don’t look at me like that. I know it’s prohibited. But there is nothing more calming than tea and books. Just be careful not to spill and you’re good to go.”

With careful steps, she kneeled, grabbing for a cup.

How cute! There are little bears on it. She sure has a good taste!

Ayaka eyes started to gleam as she looked at the dancing plushie-bears. With a fast rip, the teabag was opened and soon the air was filled with the smell of berries. It wafted around her nose, creating that sense of comfort she missed so much.

“Here, take it and get started. I can see you are eager to continue your book.”

A little smug spread across her face, as she looked at Ayaka with nothing but goodwill.

“Yes! Thank you very much for the tea. I make sure to repay you sometime,” said Ayaka and bowed lightly.

“Don’t mention it. It is our duty to take care of the youth. And, the other students ignore mostly, so it’s nice to have a chat from time to time.”

It is our duty to take care of the youth… Sometimes it feels as if you are too good for this world. I wish more adults would think like you.

Her expression turned grim; a shadow hung over her face and no sound left her lips. Her grip tightened and the tea trembled, tiny ripples breaking the reflection of light.

Ayaka gaze fell onto the surface of it, mirroring herself. But there was only a silhouette with unclear features.

“Now go, Ayaka-chan! Don’t waste time with me and start doing what you like. I know you can’t wait,” said Takimoto and pulled Ayaka out of her thoughts.

“Huh? Ah… yes, thanks for the tea again.”

Ayaka bowed lightly and moved to her usual spot. As Takimoto looked at her from behind with gentle eyes, she immediately noticed she forgot to tell her something.

“Oh no… I forgot to tell her that her place is already taken today…”

A whisper Ayaka would never hear.

She made her way straight to her usual spot, carefully balancing the cup to make she sure she wouldn’t spill anything. No one else was currently in the library, her steps echoed from the shelves, giving the hall a spooky atmosphere.

She turned around the last, big shelf at the end of the room and made her way. Each step cautious, no movement too much.

But she didn’t notice that someone already sat in her seat.

“Ikehara-san.”

A deep voice cut through the silence like a blade.

“Eh-?!”

Her shoulders twitched, her fingers slipped and the cup tilted forward. But the expected noise of crushing porcelain was nowhere to be found.

A steady grip with no wasted motion caught it midair.

Takehsi sat where she usually did, his posture calm, his expression unreadable.

“Careful,” he said quietly.

Ayaka froze, staring at the cup in his gloved hand. Not a single drop had spilled.

What is he doing here? I haven’t noticed him at all. I even dropped to cup, how embarrassing. And he knows that tea is forbidden in the library… so… I am sorry, Takimoto-san!!

“I-I’m sorry! I didn’t see-“

“I get it. You were too focused on not spilling it,” he replied, placing the cup back on the table in front of her.

“Y-yes…”

She bowed awkwardly, with slight hint of embarrassment written on her face.

What now? Do i… do I sit opposite to him? No, that would be weird. Where do I go now? Ah… I can sit on the windowsill.

There were small cushions laid on the windowsill, so students could sit there too. Ayaka tried to sit down but was immediately interrupted.

“No,” Takeshi said with a stern voice.

“What?” she asked, obviously irritated.

“You can’t sit there.”

Ayaka’s irritation grew even further and it took a second for her to process what he said.

“Uhm… w-why?”

She couldn’t hide her confusion.

“You are blocking my emergency exit.”

“… emergency… exit?”

“Yes. From this seat, I can see the entrance, every line of sight, have two walls in my back, less angles to check, the window is two meters away, ideal distance to escape quickly in case of an attack. This is the safest place.”

What the… What is he talking about? Who thinks about such stuff in a school library?

“That’s… uhm… an interesting way to look for a seat.”

Ayaka’s tone was unsure and still a little puzzled. But she tried her best not to confront him.

“Doesn’t matter if it’s interesting. Its effective.”

“Uhm… okay?”

What do I do now? Shall I sit here or look for another place? But what if others see me then? I just want my piece. Don’t want to see anyone else nor be mocked again.

Takeshi sat, legs crossed, focused on the words in his book.

He hasn’t even looked at me once! I think I should go find another. Yes, that’s the right decision. I will be a disturbance to him if I stay any longer…

“Are you going to stand there any longer? Sit down already, I am sure you are here to read.”

Ehm… is it really okay for me to do that? I mean… isn’t it weird to sit next to a teacher? Would it be rude of me to decline? I don’t want to be rude… maybe I should…

But it’s troublesome to look for another seat where I can be alone. I guess… I’ll just get started.

“If… you don’t mind then…” murmured Ayaka and bowed slightly.

She hesitated, but picked up the chair shortly after, afraid to make noises. A quick grab inside her schoolbag and a big, heavy book appeared before her.

Phew, finally I can start! Did take too long anyway.

Dust danced in the rays of light falling through the emergency exit. They warmed Ayaka’s back, while enlightening the pages of her book.

Only the turning of pages filled the room, while the smell of tea circled around her nose.

It must have been quite some time since they sat opposite to each other.

I haven’t come far. It’s like… I can’t concentrate. Why is this situation so weird? I mean, he is just silently sitting there, hasn’t said anything, nor moved in anyway. He is like a statue…

Her gaze snapped towards Takeshi, who sat silently with his eyes fixed on his book. Ayaka tried to be as secretly as possible, but her eyes stuck to the title he was holding.

“Modern Warfare – Special tactics and reconnaissance”. Why does he read something like this? That’s definitely not the standard for a teacher. But somehow… it kinda fits him. At least he is… special…

Pictures of him flashed before her eyes. His grip as he pulled her on her feet, the way he stood in front of the changing room, his grim face when he teaches in class, his posture was too stiff. Everything seemed too out of place for her.

I helped me two times already. He never said anything about what happened. It feels like, every time something happens, he is there. But… maybe it’s just coincidence. It’s the job of teachers to look after their students… right?

“What’s wrong?”

His flat, deep voice cut through the room and pulled her back to reality. He didn’t move an inch, nor did he look at her. It felt more like a comment on her behavior than an actual question. She flinched, her eyes wide, startled like a scared rabbit.

Wait! Did he notice I was looking at him? Oh no! I should have just kept on reading. Now he thinks I am a stalker or something. How embarrassing!

“Uhm! I... wasn’t… looking at anything specific. I-It’s not like I-I would… stalk you or anything. I am sorry! Please, don’t be mad at me.”

Her voice stumbled over every word, and heat crept into her cheeks. Her last words sounded more like a prayer than a plead.

“I won’t. You were staring at my book for 34 seconds. Too short for stalking, too long for a coincident.”

See! I said he is weird! But it is my fault in the first place. I shouldn’t have looked.

Before Ayaka could answer in any way, Takeshi spoke first.

“I assumed you were wondering about it. So?” he said, raising it a little.

Oh god! I didn’t notice I was staring for so long. Urgh… I am an idiot. What should I say now? I can’t be honest…
“it seems like an interesting book.” …No, I can’t lie.
“Why are you reading such weird books?” … Impossible.
“Do you want to become a warlord?” … not better…

Ayaka’s thoughts raced, biting her fingernails and staring into nothing. A feeling of pressure emitted from within her. She wanted to say something but was too scared to do so.

“Calm down. I can already guess what you were asking yourself. Why should someone like to read something like this. Right?”

“Huh!?”

Wait. How does he know? Don’t tell me he can read my thoughts. If so… No, no. Can’t be. That’s a matter of fiction. Hopefully…

A second went by, then another until Ayaka could only silently nod.

“Refreshing some memories. An unused knife’s going to rust.”

Refreshing memories? An unused knife? What is he talking about?

“Do you… like that stuff? Military things, I mean.” asked Ayaka hesitantly.

For a moment, he didn’t answer. His hand, still resting on the book, loosened just slightly. Some wouldn’t notice, but Ayaka was sensible to such things. She immediately caught the change in his presence.

His eyes, usually so sharp and steady, seemed to drift somewhere distant. A place Ayaka didn’t know and couldn’t even imagine. There was something in them she hadn’t seen before. Like a little shadow, making his already emotionless eyes lifeless.

“No, not anymore,” he said at last, his voice low, the words almost swallowed by the silence.

Ayaka blinked.

The always calm, perfect composure of his. Gone.

Just for a second and easily missed. But not to her.

Then, without a word, Takeshi closed the book. The sharp and loud clack breaking the silence made her flinch. Her fists tightened, and her heartrate went up.

For a moment, none of them moved.

Takeshi eyes, sharp again, narrowed slightly.

She wanted to say something, but every word stuck to her throat.

Why did I react like that? It was just a sound, nothing special.

Takeshi stood up, slipping the book under his arm in a single motion.

Ayaka still staring at the now empty chair, heard his voice.

“Don’t forget your tea. I guess its lukewarm already.”

Huh? Oh no, he is right.

“Oh man, I completely forgot…” she mumbled.

The silence settled again, but this time she was even more restless than before. She looked after his big frame. It felt more like a piece of flesh, alive, yet lifeless.