Could be a Problem

Now that I’d become a productive member of society, I couldn’t help but feel pity for all those ignorant fools living out on the fringes of civilization.

Hmm? Just moving to a big city doesn’t make me a productive member of society?

No no, don’t try and focus on facts or things like that. It’s about feeling. You wouldn’t understand. Now that I lived in Ah’Ruh, I could practically feel the heartbeat of the city as if it was my own beating heart.

Hmm? I don’t have a beating heart in the first place?

Well, that might be accurate, but mechanically speaking it’s already been confirmed multiple times that I’m still very capable of spraying blood from an open wound, so I’ve got some kind of magic circulation system at least.

The point of all of this is, I’ve ascended to a higher echelon. No, not ascended like that. I’m still an undead who used to be a god currently using a human’s dead body as a vessel.

I’ve ascended to a higher strata of civilized life.

I’m a city girl.

Actually, if I’m being honest, I didn’t actually live within the city’s walls. I mean, do you know about rent? They expect people to pay money just to live there! I’d never heard of such a ridiculous concept. In the forest there were no rules, and even in the village everyone took care of each other.

And what do you get for this rent? Hardly anything. You can share a tiny room with a bunch of other people. Living outside seems way more practical. I couldn't understand why anyone would think living in a city was worth it. Sometimes humans have the strangest ideas.

Hmm? Then why was I trying to act like I lived in the city?

Because I didn’t want to be left out! Eris lived in a building with some other women, Sanson had a mansion all to himself, and it turns out that traitor Rakki actually brought his huge stash of gold and treasures. He was touring all of the best inns in the city. He even traded in his dirty robes for fancy clothes fit for royalty. Granted they were all a few centuries out of style, but still! It wasn’t fair.

What gives? He used to live in a tiny hut with a dirt floor. Where does he get off living the high life now?

And why didn’t he give me any of his money? Because of my usual noble attitude, I imagine most people would assume that I would refuse any offers of monetary assistance, but that cheapskate witch never offered me anything!

And this is purely hypothetical, but I can say with a high degree of certainty that if I asked, begged even, that guy wouldn’t give me a single coin. Not that such an event ever happened. I definitely didn’t get down on all fours and beg for money with tears running down my face, and if you ever hear anything about something like that happening it’s just a case of mistaken identity.

Anyway, I needed to get my hands on some more gold. After making it this far I couldn’t accept that I was the only homeless member of our newly formed adventuring party. Sure, I could have just accepted living outside of the city, but as someone who’s already abandoned her country girl aesthetic I couldn’t go back.

That’s right, no longer was I just a simple village girl wearing a plain blue dress. After finishing things up at the clubhouse, Sanson gave me some gold to secure my well-being. I immediately spent it all on new, fashionable clothes. I mean, it’s amazing, don’t you think? There were so many different styles and designs. Best of all, they even had a whole section of the shop that had clothes in my size! I wasn’t short at all. Rakki even agreed to give my new clothes the same enchantment that he gave my old ones. According to him, the ability to reform them was actually coming from me. He just needed to link me and the clothes together.

He taught me how to do it, but I didn’t really understand the process at all. He went on about using my life force again. Getting it right was important though, so I made sure to master it, even if I didn’t understand what I was doing.

But anyway, I settled on a three piece outfit. The first layer was a pastel blue dress kind of thing. Don’t get it wrong though, it was nothing like the dress I had before. The part above my waist fit tight against my body while the lower half fanned out into a skirt that extended down slightly past my knees. The petticoat that came with it kept the skirt in position at all times. Next was a white shirt with long sleeves. The final piece of the outfit was a light tan vest that held the whole design together. The whole set was detailed with beautiful embroidery of wild flowers in full boom. It perfectly matched my natural charm.

It goes without saying that I spent the rest of the money I had left on a pair of shoes and socks that matched my new clothes.

Now that I looked like a fashionable city girl I couldn’t accept living out in the wilderness. That meant I needed some more gold.

How do people get gold anyway? I knew begging didn’t work. Other than that, I wasn’t particularly sure, but when I asked him for more gold, Sanson told me adventurers make money by completing quests. Simple enough. So I decided to head back to the Gilden Lion Clubhouse.

I stood on my tippy toes so I was tall enough to rest my arm on the clubhouse’s front counter. The receptionist, Rachel, gave a concerned look. I gave her an even more concerned look. That poor woman. She was still wearing the same dress, even though one of her coworkers had the exact same one. Once my finances were in a better state I’d help straighten her out. As a big city girl at the forefront of fashion, that was my responsibility. Besides, with how long I’d been watching over them it was almost as if I was a parent to these humans. It’s only natural I’d help them out. Hmm. Actually, I don’t like the sound of being called a mother. I’m too young for that kind of responsibility. I’d rather be seen as everyone’s reliable big sister.

“I’d like a job please. Preferably one that could pay for at least three more outfits.”

I wasn’t entirely sure how mercenaries actually got jobs assigned to them, so I decided to just have the receptionist figure it out for me.

“Um, jobs with large rewards are posted on the board over there.” Rachel pointed at a board hung on the wall with multiple pieces of paper attached to it. Oh wow. From what I understood, paper was relatively expensive, so seeing so much of it on display was rather exciting. “For simpler jobs, you can check one of the boxes.” Next, she pointed to a row of boxes underneath the board. Each was filled with various pieces of wood in varying sizes.

Ah, simple enough. High paying jobs were on paper, and lower paying jobs were written on wood scraps.

“Alright, leave it to me.”

I made it half of the way to the requests before remembering something of the utmost importance. I didn’t know how to read, and without Eris here to make a joke about it there wasn’t even any payoff for my misfortune.

I looked over the jumbled mess of characters on the papers for a moment before moving on to the wooden ones. I wanted a lot of money, but taking a high paying job when I didn’t know what it was could be too dangerous. The safer bet was picking one of the simple jobs. Simpler jobs would have simpler requests, so it would be easier to figure out what was written down.

A pretty good idea if I do say so myself.

It didn’t take much searching to find the perfect job for me. Hidden among the requests was a straightforward one that even I could understand.

A spider.

A simple spider drawn in black ink.

That was the only thing on the piece of wood.

Perfect.

I grabbed the request and brought it back over to the counter.

“I’ve decided to take the mission with the biggest reward. Give me the 6-1-1 on it.”

“What?”

“Give me the details please. The request didn’t mention everything.”

Despite what I may have said earlier, in the spur of the moment I decided this new plan was worth a try. If I tricked Rachel into explaining it for me, I wouldn’t need to read it myself.

“The Antian desertification investigation?”

“You know it. I liked the way it rhymed. I’ll take that one.”

“No, sorry. We don’t have any kind of formal ranking system, but I couldn’t let a beginner take a job like that, especially one your age. Getting involved with that request is a death sentence. Every mercenary group that operates around Ah’Ruh got that request, but no one is actually expecting a Gilden Lion to complete it.”

I’d already reached the end of that sentence many times before, but I decided to keep that to myself. Sanson told me that most people would view me as a monster, so I’d been pretending to be human.

“Fair enough. Then this one please.”

I slammed the wooden board with the picture of the spider on it down on the counter. Trying to force the issue would just seem odd, so I decided to go with my original plan.

Rachel looked over it quizzically for a moment.

“No one is quite sure what to make of this request, so it hasn’t received much attention.”

“This penmanship, it calls to me. I’ll take it.”

Needless to say, I had no idea what kind of character I was trying to act like.

“Then, that’s fine. I’ll register this job to your party.”

“No! Not my party! This one is just for me! Register it to Rem!”

I couldn’t let her bring the others into this, that would completely ruin the point. I wanted all of the reward money for myself. I also didn’t want Sanson catching wind of the fact that I was accepting my own job while I had yet to even start the quests he had previously tricked me into agreeing to complete.

“A solo job? Usually I’d recommend against that, especially for someone so young, but considering the party you're with it might not be a bad idea for you to try branching out.”

“Then just call me a tree, I’m all branches.”

Seriously, what kind of character was I trying to be?

“Ah, alright. I’ll mark this one down for you. And as for details, I don’t have much to give you. This request came in a few months ago from the village of Renzo. Once you arrive at the village, someone there should be able to explain the request to you.”

“Renzo?”

“A small farming village about two day’s ride from here. It’s a short distance from the base of the Southern Albas mountains.”

“Interesting. That could be a problem.” I don’t like to bring it up, but it might be time to accept my sense of direction outside of the forest wasn’t exactly great. To make matters worse, I didn't recognize any of the things she just said. The smart thing to do would have been to ask for more clarification, but I couldn’t do that. Asking for such basic information might make it obvious that I wasn’t human.

“Head to the main gate. If you ask around, you should be able to find a merchant heading in that direction. Show him your Gilden Lions badge and offer to work as security if he takes you along. As a no namer, especially given your looks, I doubt anyone would pay you, but they’ll at least let you travel for free. That’s how most rookie mercenaries get around.”

“Perfect! Eris and Sanson never mentioned that!”

“Well, that’s not really a method those two can use.”

I hadn’t thought about it, but she was right. I can’t imagine either of them making a good impression on any traveling merchants.

I can’t imagine something like that would be a problem for me. I’m not the type to brag, but it wasn’t that long ago that an entire village of people were practically worshiping me. Smooth talking a couple of merchants wouldn’t be a challenge.

My mission was clear. The first thing this city girl needed to do in order to put the rural life behind her was hitch a ride to some farming village out in the boonies.