Chapter 15: A Terrible Song

Richard actually locked me in a cell.

The audacity! The gall! The sheer gumption!

I can’t believe it.

A box inside a bigger box.

That's what it feels like.

That's what it always feels like being on this cursed ship. But this tiny box doesn’t even have a window!

Which is torturous.

The ocean has already felt so far away. But now I can’t even see it. Can't smell it or taste its salt on my lips.

How could Ludwig let this happen?

It has to be a joke, right? A cruel prank. Any moment he is going to come through the door and apologize. Explain what happened.

No. I'm done lying to myself.

He won't explain anything.

He won't come.

No one’s coming.

Pia won’t be able to find me. I’m not even sure she wants to.

A pang shoots through my chest.

I abandoned her.

Abandoned the only person I could ever truly trust.

A small lamp sways front and back. Left and right.

Perhaps I deserve this.

I press my head against the planks and hear the sea whisper to me. This way, I can at least smell the sweet mixture of salt and algae.

But for the first time in my life, it doesn’t calm me. In fact, it makes me even angrier.

How could Ludwig make such a deal with Richard? After everything he’s done?

I hear the waves outside crash against the ship. Raging with me.

Did I try to break into his cabin? Yes. Obviously. But I basically told him I would!

So why would he act so high and mighty? Pretend that it was about my virtue. Pretend that he has faith in me. Pretend that he believes that I would never do such a thing.

I kick the planks in frustration.

If that were true, why did he hide the grimoire away? Why had he literally ripped a page out of the tomb and eaten it? Just to keep me from seeing it!

I sink further down and wince. I hurt one of my foot finger things.

Ludwig is hiding something from me. I’m sure of it. Something that might be important. Something that might help me, help us.

Even thinking the word ties my stomach into knots.

Us. There is no us.

There never was.

It was all in my head.

I start caressing the feathers on my back.

If he hadn’t pulled me from the ocean, ripped me from my home in hopes that I would fix his, none of this would have ever happened.

He isn’t my… my friend. Or even an ally. Never will be.

I grit my teeth.

How did it take me so long to see that? Was I really blinded by a pair of ocean eyes?

Naive. How stupid and naive.

I sigh and play with my feathers.

How did he get ahold of that grimoire anyway?

It reacted to me. And only me.

I let go of the feathers. The feathers Aeros forced onto me. The feathers of a siren.

I felt connected to the symbol. I am connected to it.

A voice, or perhaps the voices of a hundred, thousand people wanted to speak through me.

What did it, what did they, want to tell me?

I groan in frustration. None of it makes any sense.

And then a thought crosses my mind.

What if he actually stole it from my people? Could it be… that he has already been to Atlantis?

The thought alone makes me sick.

No. It couldn’t be. He would have told me. He would have… no.

I don’t know what he would have done.

I don’t know him.

I don’t know him at all.

I shudder and feel the feathers on my back stand up.

Such strange things. But I feel like I’m beginning to grow strangely fond of them.

Which is exactly why I need to be working on getting rid of them.

Instead I’m trapped. Again.

I lean against the wall but it offers little comfort.

I can feel the sweet allure of despair and sink into it.

This is how I’m going to spend the month I’ve been given.

Staring at wood.

I can hear the sailors scurry about. They suddenly seem especially lively.

I roll my eyes. They really need to rub in that they have all that space up there, don’t they?

Then I hear one of them yell. "All hands on deck! We’re nearing Bergthal’s port"

I stiffen. Are we about to reach the city? Ludwig's city? The one he said I needed to see?

It makes no sense. He seemed so adamant about wanting to show me his home. I thought that, beyond just needing me, he was actually excited about that.

I really believed him.

And what’s even worse is, I wanted to see it myself. I’ve dreamt about seeing the market stalls. Smelling spices, fruits and flowers that I have never even seen before.

I wanted to visit the palace, see where he lived. Where he grew up.

Walk on cobbled streets and look at blooming trees.

I even wanted to meet the people. Wanted to see the way they walk and dance and wear those funny little hats.

I wanted… it doesn’t matter what I wanted.

Because it was a lie. All of it.

Anger blooms inside of me.

It burns my despair away and in its ashen remains I find a new resolve.

This was the last time.

I will never, ever allow a human to trap me again. Ever.

Survival of the most adaptable, that’s a rule of nature.

And that’s what I should’ve done all along.

Play by nature’s rules.

So I peer through a gap between the planks. Smile at the bit of the ocean I can glimpse.

And begin to sing.

I know it sounds awful. I can hear some sailors cuss in pain.

People begin dropping things, presumably to shield their ears. And the seagulls outside squawk a little louder, before flying away.

Still, I sing. I sing my pain. I sing my frustration. I sing, like I’ve seen Pia sing.

Open. Unfiltered. Raw.

Begging the ocean for its help.

And it answers.

I can see something stir in the water.

A black fin makes its way towards me.

And then a killer whale’s head rises from the deep blue.

I can read its eyes. See them beg. ‘Please stop singing. Please. I’ll do anything.’

I smile.

And ask it to break my cell open.