If I were you, I’d leave

I went on my way, but for a moment, our eyes met.

They didn't recognize me, but I knew them.

They were people from my hometown.

We climbed back to the ship’s deck in silence.

I was surprised to see those people...

It really touched my emotions...

The six of us left the prisoners' quarters and headed to a men's bedroom where we had rested the night before: Brigid, Wini, Megan, Annie, Klaus, and me.

"Wini, what do you have in your head? What were you doing?" Megan asked angrily. "If they distrusted you, it would be bad for you... It would be bad for all of us. You could even get caught. You know they have an interest in you and your abilities. If they find out, you will have no choice! You will be obliged to join them."

"Megan, you saw those people downstairs. Don’t you see how inhumane and unfair this is?" she retorted irritably.

"Typical of you, always wanting to save everyone. One piece of information for you, Wini: you can't. No, not alone and without planning..." Megan replied.

Wini, with a mischievous smile, took a ring from her pocket that held several keys, which could free the prisoners. She'd probably stolen them from some of the guards at some point.

Megan was perplexed and went after her to take her keys.

Brigid separated the two.

"Daughter, Wini, let's calm down," Brigid started talking. "Discussing it this way won't solve anything."

"Do you even know everyone there to know if they are all good people? How do you think this will be worth it?" Megan questioned. "Do you really want to sacrifice everyone's lives here in this madness of yours?"

"Shut up. You think that when it comes to the Empire, those people are really bad. Most of them are just numbers for their entertainment. You know that," Wini said. "Besides, I'm going to take all the responsibility for this myself. After all, it's the truth!"

"Her idea may be bad, but it's not the wrong thing to do. On the contrary, it's an admirable act."

Everyone was looking at me.

"You are an amazing person, Wini…” I said, looking at her sadly. "You seem like the kind of person who could make this world a better place."

"I should be happy and thank you for your compliments, but why did you make that sad expression?" she said, questioning me.

I just sat quietly in a chair in the corner.

So I said, "Your idealism is useless against the Mora Empire. It will only waste time, no matter what you do. I’m not trying to make you give up. I’m just telling it like it is.”

Everyone was surprised.

You could see the surprise in all their eyes.

“You’re talented, but I don’t think you should sacrifice your life like this, fighting against the Empire. And I’m not telling you to give up or to join the Empire and try to change something, because it wouldn’t. No matter which side, the Empire is a machine to grind people’s lives. I don’t have to advise, but I feel like I have to tell you this. Flee from this place, and try to find a place to live in peace, a place as your homeland was. You are a good person and deserve it. All of you here deserve... This place, the world that Mora controls, is not the place someone like you should be dealing with.”

"Why did you talk like that? Does it even sound like you care?" Megan said, quite confused and angry. "No, if it mattered, you should say something like, 'You must not do this under any circumstances.' You, you want to get rid of her, don't you? You bastard! With her dead, you’re free from the contract! And you can do whatever you want. You’re a very selfish person, aren’t you? Don’t try to play nice. It’s weird!"

...

"No… I don't want Wini to die," I started talking, "but maybe you're not wrong about me being selfish, Megan."

"Why are you being so honest out of the blue?" questioned Megan.

"Earlier, I met someone on the ship, a former General who recognized me and promised to help me with my situation after I told him what happened to me... In that moment, after that, I only thought of myself. In my reintegration into the Empire, and for that, I should stop you, Wini, from doing anything that could harm me... But... Downstairs, I recognized two prisoners. They were from the place where I was born. I grew up and even led them," I started talking, looking down. "And probably there must be more of them, dozens, maybe hundreds, good people, bad people who liked me, or hated me... Seeing them made me feel something different... But, unlike Wini, I have no desire to save them or do anything. And it’s not because of the contract with the Empire. That’s because I’m tired of fighting, of sacrificing myself for others' sake and their tastes and desires. I wanted to live in a place like the farm we lived on, in peace."

"Their leader? You so young?" Brigid said. "Should someone so young lead a people?"

"Probably not, but that’s not the point I want to address. The fact is, even if I run away, nothing guarantees chaos won't come to me again like what is happening in Uire. However, I don’t know what to do about it. However, if I were you, Wini, even though I have been through difficult moments, given the current situation, I would run away."

"No, I won’t run away!" she replied.

I stared at her. Then said, "Even if you stay and want to save them, or if you give everything of yourself, what do you intend after saving them? Do you intend to fight against the Empire to combat injustice for your people and others? Or you didn’t think about anything, and are acting because of your grief? To justify what happened yesterday? And re-signify that you are here alive now... I would like to know your answer..."

“I want to do what I believe is right,” said Wini.

“I don't understand. You go above and beyond as a good person. When your father asked me to help you, I could understand. You were his family, and the others were his subordinates. Still, this case is different: these people here are nothing to you, and even if they deserve to be saved, the cost is too high. Everyone here decided the cost wasn't worth it, but you alone kept going. Now you certainly know you have talent, but if you try, it will change your life for the rest of your life…”

She smiled, "I don't have any complex answer to this. I want to do this, because that's me."

I was surprised, but I didn't react.

"Why is that you?" I got thoughtful.

I started smiling, then I said, "I get it, I think I finally do.... " So, with an angry expression, I said, "Are you extremely optimistic? The kind that always tries to stay positive, no matter what happens. For a moment, I thought you were confident in your strength or your plans. Something usual in this world dominated by Numen. But your conviction and optimism are of the kind that are being slowly destroyed in the chaos of this world."

They were scared. Only Wini remained serious.

"You’re not the first to tell me things like that. I don't care," Wini started talking. "But I’m confused about one thing... Why don't you want to save any of these people from where you came from? You said you’re tired, but why? What happened to you?"

"And why do you want to know?"

"I'd like to understand why you feel this way about your people, and why you don't want to save them."

"I can tell you, but I don't think you're the kind of person who would fully understand the reality I lived in."

She stood in silence, staring at me, waiting for me to tell her.

...

"Well, well, I'll begin..."