Humping

"I already told you. I'm Ria."

In that moment, Nao could only stare.

"Oh, but I forgot to introduce Tyrant last time." Ria hurried over to where the bird lay sprawled in the grass, scooping up his limp body. Tyrant's head rolled to one side, wings hanging loose. "This is Tyrant. He's usually less floppy, but-"

"Where's your stone?"

"My what?"

"Your Hui-t'ien Stone. Where's it embedded?"

"Otou-san said my head was full of rocks once, is that what you mean?" 

Jin had indeed said that, about a year ago, when she'd asked if male birds poop out eggs too. 

Without another word, Nao quickly closed the distance between them, grabbed Ria by the shoulders, and spun her around. Her hands patted down Ria's arms, sides, and back.

Jin had warned Ria about perverts, but Ria never would've expected to meet one this quickly. And a woman too! Or was it a man? Did it make it better or worse?

"What are you doing?"

"Just-" Nao grabbed her face, tilting it left and right, before checking the sides of her neck. "Where is it? There's got to be one somewhere!"

After a few more probing, Nao finally stopping her inspection.

"There's nothing..." Nao said, more to herself than Ria. Then she looked up, eyes wide. "Is it true then? Are you one of the T'ien-ts'ai's?"

"Tian Cai? Like the food?"

"What?"

"You know, sugar beets. Otou-san used to prepare them sometimes when he wasn't too hung over."

"Not Tian Cai! "T'ien-ts'ai! Gifted people born with magic!"

"I mean, Otou-san said I was special once. But he also said women were gifts from the heavens and men were mistakes, so I'm not sure his opinion counts."

Nao released her and stepped back, running both hands through her hair, causing leftover spores to drift loose. "The black robes, the water magic... there's no doubt about it."

"Doubt about what?"

"Nothing. Just- Did your father ever tell you about the legend of Fūsen?"

"Oh! Yeah!" Ria brightened. Finally, something she knew. "Fūsen's this really big bird who flies above the clouds, right? And she hated her brother Dōsen so much that she just kept shitting on him from the sky. The shit piled up into mountains over time."

Nao could only stare at her again.

"Otou-san said it was important I understood that other people don't like to deal with your shit, so I shouldn't just answer nature's call where ever I please." Ria nodded proud to have learned that.

"…I'm starting to think you're father's not ok in the head."

Before Ria could defend Jin's perfectly sound mind (except when he was three sake bottles in, of course), Nao went quiet, her outline shifting as she turned away. Her posture suggested deep thought, or possibly a headache.

The lack of response made Ria think she said something wrong again. Was not having a stone thing bad? Jin always told her she was fine the way she was, but maybe he'd just wanted her to feel better at the time. Maybe normal people were supposed to have stones, and Ria was some kind of defective that way.

Did not having one mean Nao didn't want to be around her anymore?

Ria's chest tightened. She'd only just met Nao, but after traveling with her, the thought of going back to being alone left a hollow feeling in her stomach. One could argue there's Tyrant, but he barely counted as company on a good day.

When Nao then spun back around, Ria could sense that her face had transformed. Her eyes were brighter in a way she couldn't describe, and her mouth stretched into a grin.

"Ria, let's make another deal."

"Another one?"

"You're searching for your father right?" Nao gestured at the limp bird. "That flower on its back - I know exactly where it grows."

"You do?"

"Ryūsen, a city near the Shūnan Mountains. And here's the thing, that's exactly where I need to go too. So it's a win-win situation."

"Wait, you know what the flower is?"

"Hmm? Of course I do."

"But when we first met, you looked at it like you'd never seen it before."

"Did I? I was probably just... surprised to see it growing on a bird, you know?"

The explanation sounded reasonable enough, but something about the way Nao's voice pitched higher made Ria pause. Jin always said women were trustworthy and men were mistakes, but he'd also taught her that people who talked too high-pitched and fast were usually hiding something. Or was that about people who talked too slow? She couldn't remember.

Before Ria could untangle her thoughts, Nao stepped closer and slung an arm around her shoulders.

"Look, I know we just met, but I feel like we're already friends, you know? And friends help each other out! You need to find your father, I need to get to Ryūsen. Don't you think it's perfect?"

The word "friends" cut through all of Ria's suspicion. Did she really have a friend now...?

Jin had once said friends were people you willingly let within stabbing distance. Nao had definitely let her be within stabbing distance now, and earlier too. Plus, friends wouldn't betray each other.

"Alright, let's go!"

"Not so fast." Nao held up a hand. "We need to head back to the Hall first to collect our reward money."

"Our what?"

"Money. You know, for killing the ogre?"

Silence.

"...You do know what money is, right?"

"Is it a type of plant?"

"What? No! Money is- well, they're little metal coins you trade with, I guess."

"Why would anyone want metal? You can't eat metal."

"You don't eat it! You trade it for food!"

"But why not just trade the food directly?"

Nao muttered something under her breath. Ria managed to catch the words "mistake" and "why me" before Nao turned toward the ogre's den.

"Where are you going?"

"The ogre probably hoarded some valuable stuff. I'm going to take some back for more money." She waved a hand without looking back. "In the meantime, bring the ogre head with you. We need it to prove we've slain the thing."

"Bring it up how?"

"However you want."

Nao's voice drifted from deeper in the den just then, seemingly already distracted by whatever she'd spotted.

However you want, huh?

Ria turned to look at the severed ogre head, then at the puddle of water still pooling around the scattered body parts.

Well, if Nao said however she wanted...

***

The inside of the Hall felt wrong the moment Ria stepped through the door.

Instead of the scattered presences she'd sensed on her first visit, everyone had compressed into the far corner. Bodies were pressing way too close together, their outlines overlapping until Ria couldn't tell where one person ended and another began.

She turned toward the reception table, where Natsume's outline remained clear behind the large block resting on the ground.

"Why's everyone humping on top of each other over there?"

"Humping?"

"Yeah, you know. Like when the deer do it, or the rabbits. They all pile up like that."

"I don't know, maybe it's because the ogre head you brought in is dancing?"

"Dancing?"

Ria turned her attention to the water slime she'd summoned back in the clearing. Nao had told her to carry the ogre's head however she wanted, so Ria had decided that a blob with four stubby limbs would do the job nicely. Now he stood before the human-shaped lump, shuffling from side to side with the ogre's head perched where its own should've been. The head's slack jaw swayed with each step, dead eyes staring blankly ahead in an uncanny way.

"Oh, is that bad?"

As if on cue, someone from the lump in the corner made a dying sound.

"No, no, it's perfectly normal to walk into the Hall with a reanimated ogre corpse." Natsume pulled out a bamboo tablet and slapped it onto the table. "Just read and sign here so I can get this nightmare over with."

"I can't read."

"Of course you can't." Natsume grabbed Ria's hand and pressed her thumb against an ink pad, then stamped it onto the tablet. "There. Done. Congratulations on your first successful quest."

Behind Ria, the water slime tilted too far to one side. The ogre head rolled off and hit the floor with a wet sound. Natsume closed her eyes and took a long, slow breathe through her nose.

"Sorry! He likes to show off from time to time. I don't summon him much since Tyrant gets jealous of the attention, but Tyrant's been a vegetable since his dandelion got plucked, so I figured it was fine."

Natsume stared at the head rolling carefree on the ground for another long moment before finally turning to Nao.

"Why is it the strangest one you've picked up that actually survives?"

Nao just grinned, slapping a hand against Ria's back hard enough to make her stumble forward.

"You're just jealous I was able to find a gem like Ria here."

A gem!

The word caused warmth to spread in Ria's chest. Jin used to call her special, but the way Nao said gem felt different. More genuine, perhaps?

"Stop doing that." 

"Doing what?"

"That." Natsume gestured vaguely at Nao's hand, still resting on Ria's shoulder. "Acting all chummy. It's gross."

Natsume must be jealous that she and Nao had become such good friends so quickly, Ria thought. Jin had once told her that women would get competitive over the most random of things, like friendships, and sometimes they would even go as far as claw at each other's throats over them.

"Don't worry, Natsume-san! You can be my friend too if you want!"

Natsume's face did something complicated. Her mouth opened, closed, then opened again before she seemed to give up entirely. She looked down at the bamboo tablet, then back up at them before speaking with no trace of enthusiasm in her voice.

"Anyway, since you completed an A-rank quest, you'll be rewarded forty silver."

Before Natsume could move toward the back room, Nao hefted her bag onto the large block with a thunk. Various objects rattled inside: metal, glass, and something that might've been bone.

"More than forty silver no?" Nao's grin widened as she patted the bag. "Got some quality goods from the ogre's stash."

"If it's not on the quest board, I can't pay you for it." Natsume pushed the bag back across the large block. "Go take your crap elsewhere. We have standards here. Unlike you."

Nao's outline stiffened. Her hand clenched around the bag's strap before she forced herself to relax, a half grin sliding back into place.

"Forty silver will do then."

Natsume disappeared into the back room without another word. The bag of goods sat abandoned on the large block between them. Ria poked at it, causing something inside to clink.

"What exactly is in here?"

"Priceless stuff! Not that Natsume would appreciate them."

Footsteps announced Natsume's return. She emerged carrying a leather pouch that jingled with each step, then placed it directly in front of Ria.

Nao's face soured. "Hey, what gives?"

"She's the one who slayed the ogre, isn't she? Or did you suddenly develop water magic when I wasn't looking?"

"I was the one who took the quest!"

"And she was the one who completed it." Natsume tapped impatiently on her nice large block. "Take it up with the hall master if you have complaints."

Nao opened her mouth, but for once, nothing came out. Meanwhile, Ria had cautiously picked up the pouch, feeling the weight of the coins shift inside. She'd never held money before. The little metal discs clinked against each other, making nice little pleasant sounds.

Otou-san, I made money!

Ria clutched her money tighter, already imagining all the food this 'money' could buy for her otou-san. Lots of fermented mare's milk, probably, or maybe even the good kind that didn't taste like feet.

She just needed to find him first.