Chapter VII: Scents

Nonstop, I walked for about two hours with Luna fading in and out of consciousness, until we broke from the forest at last and the scents of smoke, crops and animal waste filled my lungs. Looking upon Emi’s family farmhouse, the end; only a few more steps would be enough, but my body was spent. Collapsing to the ground, I tried to fall under Luna to save her from further pain. Landing on my back, Luna landed on my body before sliding beside me.

Looking up at the sky, thoughts left me; I stared towards the farmhouse with all my hope that someone, anyone, would emerge and see us.

“EMI!” I fought to shout, but all that emerged was a hoarse scratch. Crying, I turned over and clawed at the ground, desperate to make it even an inch further, but as I blinked, my vision narrowed, my mind clouded. No! Please! Just stay awake for a moment longer. Please!

“AWOOOOO-OO-OO-O…!!!!” A deafening but pained howl, with increasing fragility, filled the air around me before dying out. Looking back, I expected to find more wolves coming to finish us off. Instead, Luna’s lifeless body was now in wolf form, sprawled out in the road behind me, her head falling limply back to the floor, with her last action, as her body gave out, to transform once again into human form.

“Wolves!” An angered, panicked voice called from the farmhouse. “Emi, Hilda, stay inside!” Geoff ordered.

Watching him run toward the sound through blurred vision, I reached out and called to him. “Geoff! Emi!”

The last thing I saw was Geoff slowing to a stop before us and dropping his wood axe to the ground.

“…staying here?” My ears opened to muffled voices.

“Yeah,” A reply before a door closed.

Consciousness returning, a hand touched my brow, opening my eyes. For a moment, Luna was there, smiling down at me, but as my eyes adjusted, she morphed into Emi, her auburn hair let down, a worried expression on her face.

“Raven!? Can you hear me?” She asked tearfully.

Nodding, I tried to sit up, only for the pain in my arm and leg to return.

“No, you don’t. You stay exactly where you are,” She ordered, pushing me back down with a light gentleness.

“Where is she?” I croaked. “Is Luna okay?”

“She’s in much worse shape than you, and she hasn’t woken up yet, but she’s recovering,” Emi assured me, holding my hand in both of hers. “She’s in my Mum and Dad’s room.” She added before laughing painfully. “My Mum fought to keep you both from coming into the house; she said you needed to be treated in the barn with the other animals. But as soon as she saw Luna’s wounds and your sorry shape, she couldn’t help but fetch her medical supplies and herbs to help,” Emi said, smiling through a sniffle. “What happened?”

“Let me see her,” A bawled, ignoring Emi’s question.

“You can’t. Not yet. Soon. For now, just stay with me, and keep talking.” Stepping to the door for a moment, Emi opened it. “Mum! Raven’s awake; can you get her some food and water?” Hurrying back to my side, Emi held my hand again. “Now, tell me what happened.” She requested, despite sounding reluctant.

Pausing to find my voice, I first turned over my hand to grip Emi’s “Luna took me to a nearby spring for us both to bathe, but we were interrupted by a pack of wolves. L-Luna defended me, kept me safe, but s-she…” Tears filled my face; my voice failed as I lacked the breath to continue. “It’s all my f-fault! If I just wasn’t around…” Emi held my head to her chest, rendering me unable to speak.

“It’s not your fault. If you hadn’t been there, Luna would have died.”

“But, t-they were after m-me!” I screamed. “I was what they wanted! One of them tried to…” I tried, but as the memory crystallised in my mind, my whole body started to shake, and my breath quickened into an irregular rhythm.

“Raven, calm down. It’s okay; you’re safe now. Look at me.” Emi requested, holding my cheeks with my rabbit ears falling over her hands. “Focus on me,” She said as I stared at her. “Breathe with me. In… 1… 2… 3… Out… In… 1… 2… 3… Out…” Following her lead, I regained control, but my body still shook.

“Here, I brought some carrots, some berries and some water,” Hilda said as she walked through the door. “Emi, could you put this tray in Raven’s lap?” Taking the tray, Emi placed it in my lap as asked. “Are you okay, dear?” Hilda said as she knelt beside me. “You must have had quite the fright. But you did well to bring not only yourself but Luna here as well. Now eat up, and get your strength back.” She added, stroking my hair and ears, barely even acknowledging the existence of my rabbit features.

“Is Luna okay?” I asked again, this time to Hilda.

“She’s okay, but she’ll recover faster as soon as you get enough strength to be by her side.” With that, Hilda left the room, leaving Emi and me alone once again.

“Do you want me to feed you?” Emi teased, with a hopeful, impish grin, searching to comfort me.

“No, I can do it,” I claimed, picking at the assortment of raspberries, blackberries and blueberries, slowly eating one after the other, in a deliberate calming rhythm.

Watching me eat, Emi’s eyes began to wander. “I’ve never seen you do this,” She said questioningly as she reached out to touch my ears. “Can I stroke them?” She asked. Looking from her to her hand, I nodded. “I saw your tail as well. Well, I saw all of you, to be honest.” She smiled, watching as my cheeks grew a little red.

“Luna taught me how to do it,” I responded, keeping my tone close but light. “It feels comfy,” I added after much thought.

“We saw Luna’s tail and ears as well. Seems as though you two were having lots of fun without me,” Emi pouted.

“We kissed,” I said without ceremony, overtaking Emi’s teasing. “We held each other. She said I was hers…” I paused and stared Emi directly in the face, a single tear rolling down my cheek. “Can I still be? Or will this happen again? Will it keep happening until I’m caught, killed, or vanish? Will it be by their jaws or Luna’s?” As my fears fell from my mind, they finally made their way to my tongue, each one colder and more piercing than the last.

Emi removed her hand from my ears for but a moment before holding both her hands to my cheeks again, this time pressing on my ears. “Yes. No. No. And neither!” Emi said, emphatically answering all of my stabbing remarks one by one. “I don’t know where you get these thoughts; all I can do is tell you that they are wrong. The only person who can stop them is you, and the only person who can help you with that is Luna.” Pausing, she went back to stroking my hair and ears. “I’ve never seen a brighter smile on your face than when you were talking about Luna, and how she just let you be you. So, please… Trust her. But more importantly… Trust yourself.” As Emi finished, she gave me a quiet hug before rising and moving to the door.

“Where are you going?” I said, desperately.

“Don’t worry, I’ll be back. I just need to check on Luna, and maybe change her bandages.” Emi said with a reassuring smile before leaving the room.

As the day wound on, my strength returned to the point that by lunchtime, with some help, I could stand and walk around.

“Can I see her now?” I asked, draped in a white nightdress as Emi held my right side.

“Come on then,” Emi said with much effort.

“Stop it, I’m not that heavy!” I protested while stifling an undesired giggle.

“I finally got you,” Emi gloated, laughing to herself as she pushed open the door to her parents' bedroom. As the door creaked open, my eyes were fixed on the bed, where Luna was still unconscious, her laboured breathing the only sound.

Breaking free of Emi, I stumbled across the room, falling but catching myself on the end of the bed.

“Raven!” Emi cried, but I did not hear.

Scrambling around the bed, I grabbed Luna’s hand, which lay atop the covers. As soon as I grabbed her, Luna started to groan and shake her head from side to side. “Raven,” she croaked.

“I’m here, Luna,” I replied.

“She’s been saying your name all night and day. We think she’s having nightmares of last night.” Emi said before her expression turned downcast. “But she’s also been saying other things.”

“What other things?” I asked, looking back with eyes of peril, before Luna’s voice distracted us both.

“Mum! Dad! Please! Stop! Don’t leave me here. Please. Don’t leave me.” Holding her hand tighter, I closed my eyes, wishing that my feelings might reach her, and she would wake from her nightmares.

“Raven?” Luna suddenly said very clearly. Looking up, I found her still unconscious. “Please don’t be scared of me. Please. Don’t leave me.”

Breathless, I cupped my mouth as I took in Luna’s frail, broken body. Looking down, I wept on the floor. “I’m never going to leave you. I don’t care how dangerous things get. I’ll never leave you.” As I halted, Emi started to rub my back.

Night fell, but Luna stayed unconscious. Sitting at the dinner table, I was surrounded by Emi and her parents; next to me, a space sat empty.

“She’ll wake up soon, don’t worry,” Geoff said, noting my longing gaze to my side. “My wife’s medicine never failed man or animal. Luna is in good hands, rest assured.”

“And why can’t you praise me like that all the time?” Hilda questioned, feigning hurt.

“I do, dear. This food, for example, it's to die for.” Geoff defended.

“I see,” Hilda finished with a side eye.

Watching them bicker made me smile; it made me wonder if Luna or I would ever end up like that. But the thought of us continuing to be together brought with it another less savoury thought.

“I want to go back to my village,” I said without warning.

“What!?”

“Huh!?”

“Raven!?”

They each remarked differently.

“Not permanently. I want to go back and show that I’m alive and happy. And I want to introduce Luna to my parents. It’s as you said, Hilda, right now there are parts of me that never want to see my parents again, but deep down, I know that is not what I really want, or rather what I need.” I explained, looking at each person before me for their approval.

“If that’s what you want, I’m not going to stop you. So long as Luna is there to protect you.” Emi spoke up first.

“I still think you should at least consider, if not a permanent return, then maybe living closer by, maybe even with a colony of rabbits; at least then you’ll be with your own kind. You could still see Luna, but you’ll be much safer.” Hilda argued. I understood she was not trying to hurt me or cage me as others had done, but despite the good intentions and calm goodness of her tone, I averted my gaze, a short sickness filling my stomach.

“No. I can’t. It doesn’t matter where I go, human or rabbit; there will always be those who don’t accept me. Maybe I’ll feel more comfortable with rabbits than I do people, but that doesn’t mean to say all of the rabbits will be comfortable with me. I wish they were, and I know most are; at least all of the ones I have interacted with so far have. And I don’t mean that I consider people impossible to be around. But you said it yourself: the reports from the capital, the vilification, the talk that we’re diseased and cursed.” Pausing, I went to catch my breath, as Emi reached out to grab my hand. “But we’re none of those things,” I forced through tears desperate to escape my eyes. “We didn’t choose these bodies; we were just born this way. And at the end of the day, just like you, we are trying to survive, and above all trying to be happy.” Taking another breath, I couldn’t remember another time I had spoken for myself so clearly; it felt liberating, terrifying, but freeing. “I won’t forget where I came from, nor will I run from new connections. But my home. Where I belong. That is with Luna.” I finished at last, breathing out deeply, before looking around the room; they were all silent. As Emi smiled and gripped my hand ever tighter, I looked to her Mother, who seemed stunned for a moment before returning with a sincere, resigned, accepting smile of her own.

Looking to Geoff, he had no expression, not at first; he only stared back at me as if calculating. “What do you need our Daughter to do?” He asked at last with a wry smile, jumping past my declaration with great pragmatism.

“Huh? Me?” Emi said, pointing at herself and looking from her Father to me.

Turning to her with a sigh. “Emi, would you go to the village ahead of us and guide us through, basically act as a barrier between them and us. I don’t know if this is right; I certainly don’t think it is fair to ask this of you. But I feel that if they see you as another human allied with us, then that could dissuade anyone from getting in the way or stopping us.” I explained, looking at Emi with begging eyes.

Looking me up and down, Emi sighed warmly. “You really are too cute to refuse, aren’t you? Yes, I’ll go.” Emi said, rolling her eyes. “Now I understand how you ensnared Luna. To think, a bunny besting a wolf at her own game.” She laughed before returning to her meal. Thanking her with a smile, I returned to my own.

“When are you wanting to go?” Hilda asked, interested.

“When are you next visiting my village?” I asked in return, looking to Geoff for an answer.

“With winter fully setting in, I don’t think I would likely be going back until early spring, maybe.” He explained. “That said, I would be willing to make the journey specifically for this, if that’s what you wanted.” He added, with an understanding feeling.

“Ahh, no, it’s fine,” I said, gesturing with my hands before me in a show of denial. “That should give me more than enough time to figure myself out. And somehow explain all this to Luna.” I added, lowering my voice in defeat, for now.

After dinner, we all got ready for bed. Emi’s parents had set up a makeshift bed in the kitchen after leaving their room for Luna, while Emi escorted me to her room.

Letting me sleep in her bed, Emi got into her own makeshift bed on the floor.

“Night night.” She called.

“Night.” I tentatively replied, and then silence fell.

But a few minutes after saying good night, Emi’s voice filled the room again. “Hey!” Emi whispered from the murky darkness.

“What is it?” I whispered back.

“I know this might not be a good time, so stop me if you don’t want to hear it. But I was thinking about how you two might be able to avoid wolves or other predators in the future.” She said before waiting for my approval to continue.

“How?” I asked, fear reemerging but with a hopeful curiosity.

“Well, I was wondering if those wolves were hunting you by your scent?”

“I believe so, yes?”

“So, surely the more time you and Luna spend together, the more other animals will associate your scent with Luna. Wouldn’t they?” She finished, questioning herself. “I don’t know. Maybe I’m just making shit up here. You’ll know more about this than I would anyway.” She added, sounding somewhat defeated, but I could tell she was still satisfied for having said it.

Thinking for a moment, my mind began to work. Theoretically, it could work, but how long would it take? Could you speed up the process? Lots of questions swirled around my head, but one thought was clear. It’s worth a try.

As the night wore on, I did not close my eyes; instead, I stared at the ceiling, listening intently down the hall where Luna was sleeping, hoping to hear her cry as she woke. But all I heard were the muffled, repeated words of her nightmares.

“Emi?” I whispered.

No response. To check, I peered over the edge of the bed to find her sound asleep on the floor.

Looking around and listening again, the house was silent save for Luna’s muffled sleep talking. Stepping out of the bed, I held the wall to balance myself; my arm and leg still needed some time to heal, but I was not about to let that stop me. Sneaking to the door, I carefully opened it before slipping out into the hallway and closing it behind me. Catching a glimpse of Hilda and Geoff in the kitchen, I stopped to listen to their breathing; it was slow and steady, the breaths of sleep. Holding myself up with the wall, I limped as quietly as I was able towards Emi’s parents’ bedroom door, again slowly opening it and slipping inside before closing the door behind me.

Once inside, I stood at the foot of the bed, watching Luna for a moment. I cried again seeing her in such a pained state, but before any of my tears fell, I transformed, leaving my borrowed night dress in a heap on the floor. After finding my way out from under the clothing, I scrambled onto a chest by the bed, careful not to scratch or damage anything, before hopping onto the coarse, warm sheets of the bed.

“Hmmm,” Luna groaned, stopping me dead for a moment, not from fear of discovery, but from hope of her waking. But she did not.

Hopping forward, I moved around to beside her before climbing up onto her chest. Staring at her for a moment, I quickly flopped gently onto her chest, resting my head on her bosom, before finally closing my eyes to sleep.

Stirring from my slumber as birds sang their morning songs, a sudden warmth brushed against me in a gentle motion; I strained to open my eyes as the calming sound of Luna’s voice filled my ears. “You really are such a naughty bunny, aren’t you?” Her stern, breathy voice called, waking me with a start. “Ah, ah, ah. No, you don’t. You're not going anywhere.” Luna said, holding me tighter to her stomach as she sat up in bed.

As soon as I realised it was her, I calmed again and let her have her way with me, petting, holding, cuddling; I would have put up with anything if it meant staying by her side.

“We’ve all already had breakfast, but don’t worry, I’ve got yours here; just don’t make a mess.” She said, ensuring I acknowledged the warning before holding a piece of carrot to me. Grabbing it, I started munching as she continued to stroke my back. “I heard you carried me all the way from the spring to the farmhouse,” Luna said, with much pride in her voice. “Who would have guessed you would be so strong?”

I said nothing; instead, upon finishing the piece of carrot, I broke free of Luna’s arms and started rushing around the bed before hopping back into Luna’s lap and pawing at her, making sure she was indeed still with me. Wrapping her arms back around me, I started rubbing my chin on her before flopping over on my back as a show of trust.

“Are you not afraid of me?” Luna asked, her voice wavering ever so slightly, before she held a strawberry to my mouth, letting me take bites as she stroked me for herself, not for me.

We stayed at Emi’s for another couple of days as we both recovered enough of our strength to return to our den. And as we both waved goodbye, we both felt a strong urge to get home fast.

Walking hand in hand, wearing the borrowed night clothes, each stuck in our own thoughts in silence. Until at the foot of our hill, I spoke up. “What scent would you say is stronger to a wolf, that of prey or other wolves and predators?” I asked, hoping for a certain answer.

“What do you mean?” Luna responded.

Pausing to rephrase, I spoke again. “I’m wondering if those wolves the other night caught my scent and were blinded by me so they didn’t notice you.” As I explained myself, we entered the den; Luna quickly gave everything a once-over, ensuring nothing had been taken, or no other animals had stolen our space.

“Yeah. I mean, I’ve done that before. You get so focused on the prey that you fail to notice others after the same prey. But what are you getting at?” Luna asked, her voice softening as she became more curious.

“It’s actually something Emi suggested. But those wolves were hunting me and became blind to you. So to stop this from happening in future, we need to ensure that the scents predators associate with me, they also associate with you.” I explained, while sitting down in our bed. Crouching down before me, Luna waited for me to elaborate; instead, I got closer to her, watching her, my gaze strong and unfaltering. I had now gained the safety and comfort I had been longing for; I was not about to lose it.

“What are you suggesting?” Luna asked, her tone confused but with an underlying desperation. Perhaps she already sensed what I was getting at.

“In more crass terms, we need to mark each other as one another’s. We need to make a scent of our own. Together.” As I finished, I stared at Luna, waiting for her response, watching as the words clicked in her brain; her expression shifted from confusion to thoughtful curiosity, then to shared understanding and a snide smirk.

“Oh,” Luna said at last. Seeing her tail wag behind her, I smiled, thankful. The panic and worry of our uncertain future left our bodies but still lingered in the air around us. Luna moved to lie with me in the bed, holding my cheeks. She kissed me, forcing me to the ground and her above me. However, as I hesitated to kiss back, she paused. “I scare you, don’t I?” She asked, becoming panicked. “I remind you of those wolves.” She continued, almost running from me, in fear of herself. But I held her above me with all my strength, keeping her in position.

“I wasn’t reminded of anything.” Sensing Luna calming, but still with her ears drooped, I pulled her face closer to mine. “I was scared in the moment and after I woke up. But not anymore. Not with you here.” I whispered to her, watching her ears perk for a moment. I thought I had calmed her worries, but as quickly as they perked, they drooped again.

“But what if I hurt you?” She asked, genuinely afraid and hurt.

“What do you want, Luna?” I asked, probing.

“I want to show you how much I love you. How much I care about you. But I’m scared of losing myself, of becoming what you fear.” She answered honestly; for the first time, I witnessed a Luna stripped of all confidence, a broken soul, worn down by isolation. A girl who once cried out to her parents in fear as they left her behind; the circumstances I did not know, but the pain—I felt. “I just don’t want to hurt you.” She resigned, pushing away from me.

I needed to reinstate her confidence; I wanted nothing more than to see her self-assured smirk, her commanding confidence; it was what grounded me, kept me feeling safe. But for that to return, for once I needed to take charge.

Fighting against her, Luna yielded, allowing me to pull her closer again. Holding her cheeks, I held us a hair’s breadth away from each other.

“You won’t hurt me. I don’t think you ever could. I trust you. And besides, I don’t recall ever asking you to be gentle with me,” I affirmed to her before kissing her and then hugging her, ensuring she had nowhere else to go.

To my relief, it did not take long for her to start kissing back; she even bit my lip before finally pushing me down onto the blankets. Her arms outstretched around me, breathing heavily; there was a light in her eyes, a lustful hunger as she stared at me. Deep inside, my heart began punching out of my chest as I waited.

Giving in to herself and to me, Luna did not relent until darkness fell once again.