Nightmares

My father, a few of his - friends? Followers? I don’t remember what they were.

We travel deep within the mountains, rumours of an old tree sitting at its peak, protected by the harsh cold elements in a cave. I remember how odd it was for a tree to be growing in such a chilled atmosphere. How is it even growing in the dark?

Reaching the cave, hidden so delicately in the snow. It was dark, cold and wet, snow pouring into the hole. The wind howls through the hollow passage. My father lit a torch, slowly guiding us through the cave. Walking deeper and deeper, there it was. An enormous tree stands tall in the centre of the cavern. It leaves shimmering with beautiful, vibrant green, touched with a gold tinge.

The tree lit up the once dark cavern like the sun’s light, casting aside the need for torches. It exudes a vibrant energy, infusing the surrounding space with life and vitality. And just like all nightmares, the details haze out, skimming over the unnecessary plots and skip to the most crucial point of the story.

Standing before the tree, father had killed the adversaries on this trip, enchanting as he draws with their blood on the ground—another ritual and soon to be another failure. Father uses the rest of the blood to draw on the tree and draw marks on my face, still enchanting. The tree reacts to the spell. Marking's glow, everything was so bright, it was blinding; I shield my eyes...

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

I wake up gasping once more, my body shakes, feeling my limbs wiggling my toes. If my heart could beat, it would sound like galloping horses, and I would work up a sweat as if I had competed in an Olympic sport. I scrunch myself up to a ball, ignoring the light of the moon beaming down into my room. Scrunching my eyes close and trying to force myself back to sleep... but I can’t. Flashes of my memory play before me, forcing me to open my eyes yet again.

Sighing, I get out of bed, meandering down the steps. Syrus is in the same place as I initially left him, sitting in front of the chair, a book in hand, and the warm glow from the fire illuminating the room.

“How are you feeling?” I jump. He didn't know I was here. I didn’t reply straight away, walking up to the older vampire and sitting on the wooden floorboards next to his small pile of books. I found the heat from the fire too much and scooted back a little. It felt like my skin was sizzling.

“I’m...” I stop to think. The hunger is only a dull ache. Another human would snuff it out completely, but I am not as desperate as I was when I first woke up. The weariness in my body is still present. I wish to sleep, but that will not be happening soon. “I’m a little hungry, but okay and sleepy,” I murmur the last part, letting my eyes wander to the pile of books. It has been a while since I had read something for pleasure. It mostly studies when I was younger.

“Then why don’t you go back to bed? It’s natural for newly turned to sleep for a long time,” Syrus explains, and I shake my head.

“No,” I whisper. “Not yet,” I grab one from the pile and open it to a random page.

“So you can read?” Syrus muses, still reading the page he is on. I glare at him, telling myself to ignore him, but the comment really got to me.

“I learnt at a young age,” I retaliated, reading the book I had picked up. Syrus hums, a small smile gracing his lips.

“Would you like me to go get you someone?” he asks me. I stop and thought about it for a second, but shake my head.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

“I can wait longer,” I murmur, feeling my eyes getting heavier as I read. My body shifts to the left, little by little, I lean closer to Syrus. Subconsciously getting closer and closer, till my eyes closed, and I fell asleep leaning on him and his chair.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

“Now since you can read, I want you to start reading all these books,” my father declares carrying four heavy thick, leather-bound books, a heavy layer of dust covering them, my father drops the books, and a thick plume of dust wafts into the air. I sneeze over the books, and my father slaps me. “They’re over a hundred years old, do you realise how precious they are!” he growls. I curl up in the seat and bow down.

“I’m sorry father,” I murmur, tears threatening to spill from my eyes. Still feeling the sting on my cheek.

“Stop crying, you’re a man and need to act like one,” he huffs, opening the book to the first page. I struggle to read the passage. ‘a guide to spells.’

“What if I can’t understand certain words,” I whimper, curling into the chair, shutting my eyes, waiting for him to explode at me.

“Come and get me and I will help, but until then, I don’t want you leaving this room till you have read all of those books,” he demands and slams the two oak doors shut, the clash echos loudly within the personal library.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

I jump awake once more, shakily swallowing the non-existent spit from my mouth and my hands judder. I look around to find myself back in my room. The sun blaring down. I could feel incisors push against my gums, slicing into my tongue. Everything burns within my body. Blood, need blood. I hear the familiar thumping outside my room and across the hall. Rushing out of the bed and stumbling to the door. Nearly tripping over my feet to reach the doorknob and ripping the door open. Lunging at my captured prey, I waste no time biting into their soft flesh and focus all my attention on the warmth pooling into my stomach. Feeling the fire doused throughout my body. I moan deeply as I continue to drink and enjoy the feeling of pleasure crash down. I let go of the body, feeling a little more refreshed but still hungry. One is never enough.

“I had a feeling you would be hungry,” Syrus’s voice grabs my attention. Another human in his grasp, fighting with all their might to get out from it. Syrus rolls his eyes, at their attempts and throws them to me, capturing them in mere seconds and feed.

I finished them off quickly just as I did with the first one, feeling better, more in control of myself. “Sleep well?” Syrus inquires leaning against the door frame. I go to open my mouth but think back on the dreams, my insides churned and quaked, fear lingers in the back of my mind, taunting me. Syrus takes note of my silence. “You passed out on the floor, I took you back to your bed if you were wondering.” I wasn’t, but I believe he was trying to change the subject.

“Thank you,” I whisper, getting up from the floor. Syrus sighs a little and leaves the room, only to come back with a rag in his hand.

“When you feed, do you go to the artery or anywhere on the neck?” he asks and gives me the rag. I take it in silence and wipe my face and shrug in response. “I don’t see the difference. I get blood in the end.”

Syrus walks over to the body, inspecting my bite, frowning as he does, and shows me the gouge I tore into the shoulder.

“You need to aim for the throat,” he points. “There’s an artery you can tap into. You can drink without making a mess and getting the most from the body.” Syrus’s fingernail sharpens, slicing into the skin, showing me where I need to bite. “It takes practise, but when you’re able to be more in control, you can feel for it,” he murmurs, dropping the body.

“How long will it take?” I ask.

“Give it three months, and you will have some semblance of self when hunting. For now, it’s not possible,” Syrus explains. “But focus on the throat if you can. Don’t fret too much if you forget. I know how maddening the hunger is.” I nod at his words, staring at my feet, feeling a little defeated but can’t help the fear lingering in the back of my head, feeling heavy-hearted in my chest. “Are . . . are you all right?” Syrus asks a little softly. I look up at the vampire, staring into his light grey eyes and nod, swallowing the lump in my throat.

“Yeah, just . . . tired,” I lied and walked out of the room, leaving my sire behind.

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“No, no, no,” my father huffs, stomping over to me, nostrils flaring, eyes burning as he stands over me. “You are doing it wrong, you stupid boy,” he hisses.

“I... I . . . I” I stutter, trying to explain myself. “I did the best I c-could,” I stammer, shrinking under him.

“No, you’re not,” he hisses, grabbing my arm, dragging me down the halls, and throws me back into the library. “Do not come out till you have finished reading all those books again!”