XXXVI - First Snow

The vast lake shimmered silver beneath a pale autumn sky as they approached Rubia’s harbor.

Their ship lay moored among larger cargo barges and shallow fishing boats, while travelers with luggage waited impatiently for their turn to board.

Pan eyed the vessel curiously.

“So this thing really goes all the way across the lake, mm?”

“It’s a mail ship.” Elda gave a nod. “Takes passengers, mail, and smaller cargo. Stops at several towns along the shore and a few islands.”

He gestured out across the water.

“Takes a little longer, but it’s also a lot cheaper than the direct routes.”

A moment later, he had a cigarette between his lips.

“We probably won’t reach the northern shore until after dark. But taking this route should save us enough that, once we make it to Aenzia, we’ll still have the money for passage east.”

Pan let her gaze wander across the lake.

The opposite shore was nowhere in sight, the lake looking almost like an ocean.

The passage east…

At last, the line ahead of them began to move, and soon they were making their way up the gangplank.

Benches stood beneath a narrow canopy, luggage was stacked wherever there was room, and sailors hurried back and forth between bow and stern.

Pan took it all in with interest.

But when the mooring lines were cast off and the ship slowly pulled away from the quay, her hand closed around the railing without her realizing it.

Rubia drifted farther and farther behind them, and before long, the entire city was little more than a pale strip along the southern shore.

Gentle waves lapped against the hull below.

For a moment, Pan heard something else.

Thunder.

Wind.

A dark, raging sea.

This is the first time I’ve been on a ship since then…

Her claws tightened around the railing until the wood creaked softly beneath them.

Distant memories flashed through her mind, memories she had thought long buried.

PAN, STAY BELOW DECK!

G-grandma…?!

Her breathing quickened.

“Pan?”

She spun around.

Haku stood beside her, concern written across her face.

“Are you all right?”

Pan immediately let go of the railing and clasped her hands behind her back.

“Uh… o-of course, mm! I just... wanted to check the steadiness of the railing, that's all! He he...”

Haku’s eyes drifted to the spot where several fine scratches now marked the wood.

“I see…”

***

After several stops along the shore, they reached a small island a few hours later, its green slopes almost entirely covered in apple trees.

While sailors unloaded sacks of mail and brought fresh cargo aboard, merchants crowded the quay, calling out to passengers and offering their wares.

“Meadow Isle is famous for its fertile soil,” Elda explained. “And since we won’t be leaving again for another hour… want to stretch our legs?”

“I would like that,” Haku said at once.

They had barely set foot on the island when Pan’s nose began to twitch.

“Mmhmm…”

Her attention had already locked onto a small stall right by the harbor.

Elda followed her gaze.

Fish had been pinned to wooden boards propped at an angle around an open fire, roasting slowly in the heat.

“Charred char,” he explained. “Supposed to be especially good here.”

Pan was already heading toward the stall as though her body had decided for her.

A few minutes later, they were each holding a warm roll stuffed with roasted char, onions, coleslaw, and honey-mustard sauce.

They all took a bite almost at the same time.

“This is… mmph… soo good!” Pan murmured happily.

“It’s been a long time since I’ve had fish this fresh.” Haku took another bite in obvious agreement.

Then Pan noticed Elda.

He seemed oddly content as well.

“Wait. Don’t tell me your sense of taste is back?!”

His head snapped from side to side so quickly that he almost choked.

“Of course not!”

He turned slightly away from them, his voice dropping almost to a whisper.

“But somehow… this still makes me happy.”

Pan blinked.

A knowing smile passed between her and Haku, but neither of them pressed him any further.

Before returning to the ferry, each of them picked up something else from the island.

Pan bought a small bag of dried apples.

Elda bought a new knife with an applewood handle.

And Haku bought a single apple fritter dusted with powdered sugar.

By the time the ferry left the island behind, the sky had already darkened. 

Dense gray clouds rolled in from the north, gradually swallowing the light.

On the upper deck, Pan slowly chewed on a slice of dried apple while Elda sat across from her, sharpening his new knife.

“They always sell these things way too dull…”

Beside him, Haku was working her way through the apple fritter.

The wind had picked up.

Pan watched as Haku pulled the dark-blue scarf tighter around her neck.

Or at least what was left of it.

The burned end was so short that it barely reached past Haku’s shoulder.

Several of the silver threads had turned black, and the fabric was frayed in more than one place.

“You know…”

“Hm?”

“Now that we have the money, we could probably buy you a new scarf, mm.”

Haku’s fingertips brushed over the fabric.

“A new one?”

Pan gently tugged at the burned end.

“I mean, look at it. It can barely keep you warm anymore…”

For several seconds, Haku simply studied the damaged scarf.

Then she pulled it a little tighter around herself.

“N-no. It’s fine.”

“But…”

“It still does what it’s supposed to. Buying another one would just be a waste of money.”

A small, almost embarrassed smile appeared on her face.

“Besides… I like this one.”

Pan stared at her, and suddenly her heart began to beat a little faster.

“Oh…”

That was all she managed.

She quickly turned her attention back to her apples.

She still wants to keep it…

***

As the afternoon wore on, the shores faded farther and farther into the distance.

The lake grew so vast that, for a while, Pan could almost believe she was back on the open sea.

The ferry made only two more stops: once at a small town, and later at a narrow island where a small monastery stood among dark fir trees.

The farther north they traveled, the colder the wind became.

Pan had just begun to doze off when something cold and white drifted onto her nose, melting at once.

“Hm?”

Another landed on her sleeve.

A tiny white crystal.

She raised her head.

Scattered snowflakes were drifting down all around them.

“Snow…”

Beside her, Haku looked up as well.

One flake caught in her silver hair, then another.

“It’s snowing already?”

Pan gazed out across the lake.

More and more flakes drifted silently through the air while the gray water stretched all the way to the horizon.

“A little early, isn’t it?”

“Not necessarily this far north,” Elda explained. “Winter often comes early up here.”

By evening, the snowfall had stopped.

The clouds had begun to break apart, revealing patches of deep blue sky.

Most of the passengers had already gone below deck, and Elda had disappeared as well.

Only Pan and Haku remained at the bow, where the cold wind swept across the water.

Ahead of them, the lights of a distant settlement glittered along the shore.

Haku rested both hands on the railing.

“Vadonia really is a beautiful country.”

Pan stepped up beside her.

“Mhm.”

For a while, they listened only to the soft slap of the waves against the hull and the wind tugging at the sails.

“I wonder if the East will be just as interesting.”

Pan said nothing.

Carefully, she glanced around.

We’re alone.

Maybe… I should just tell her now...

“Haku… I…”

Haku turned toward her.

“Hmm?”

Pan looked into her silver eyes.

Just say it.

Get it over with.

Now.

Her palms began to sweat.

“I wanted to tell you…”

Suddenly, an image flashed through her mind.

Haku kneeling before her in the tavern all those months ago.

If necessary, I will gladly give my life to ensure your victory over the Demon Emperor!

Haku in the burning temple.

Because I want to stay with you, until the end!

Pan swallowed, the words dying in her throat.

“I just wanted to say…”

Haku waited patiently.

A crooked smile stretched over Pan’s face.

“…that the scarf really suits you, mm!”

For a moment, Haku only blinked.

Then a faint blush rose to her cheeks.

“Oh.”

Her fingers went to the scarf.

“Th-thank you.”

Pan quickly looked back out across the water.

Damn coward…

Her claws tightened around the railing.

Elda was right.

The longer I wait… the worse it gets.

Haku’s shoulder brushed lightly against Pan’s.

On the horizon, the first lights of the northern shore glittered in the darkness.

And somewhere beyond them lay Aenzia.