Chapter 3

I am The Thomas Frewdenburg. I think this often to keep the simplicity of who I am. There's not much to me besides my size and my music. Before we left, I told Cryo and David that we should stick to back roads as we make our way between locations. Most of the objects on Gnomeo’s list seem to be common supplies and I spotted a general store on the way in. I’m leading the group and hear a distinct, “Ooooo, what’s that?”

Cryo and I turn around and spot David walking through the crowded street. “You idiot!" I discreetly yell, “You’re going to get us caught!”

David ignores my correct advice and makes his way to a towering building so imposing, that if it weren't for the rust in my eyes, I’d stare in awe. Gargoyles line the building, putting even Notre Dame to shame. Before I can even say anything else, Cryo bounds past me, and I grab him before he does something stupid.

I stress, “Don’t follow that idiot! He’s going to compromise the mission.”

“That idiot is our friend, I’m going after him no matter what!” Cryo shouts as he breaks free of my grip and chases after David. I’m not doing that, because I’m not stupid. We had one task: get the items, come back, and do not approach the Cathedral. And Cryo himself swore that he wouldn’t go too!

The good thing about being a Firbolg is that I’ve mastered the magic of invisibility. As I cloak myself, I watch an imbecilic scene unfold:

David stands before the Cathedral and says “I think this is the Cathedral… Wow! There's so many people here!”

Cryo attempts to grab David in futility. “Idiot, we had one job, let's go before we’re spotted!”

“Idiot? Who you callin’ idiot?! It seems you’re one too considerin’ you’re here as well!”

“That’s not the point, I’m trying to stop you!”

As the two idiots squabble, two guards begin to approach them, and of course, they don’t notice until it’s too late.

“Is there an issue here, gentlemen?” the lady guard asks, waving her sword.

Cryo tries to cover up their stupidity by revealing things no one asked, “No, No. We are Summoned, heroes from another world, we are here on top secret duties and must be making our way.”

The guards look at each other in confusion. The male guard asks for identification, and Cryo innocently hands him the Core Drill. The guards are astounded by the info the Core Drill contains: the names, ranks and locations of each member within Kai-Gurren. All given away. To strangers.

“So we have some bonafide ‘Summoned’ on our hands,” the male guard says as he suspiciously hands the drill back. “We’re gonna take you in for questioning, this still doesn’t prove your intentions here.”
The lady guard pulls out her cuffs, and they seem to be gearing for a confrontation. Cryo and David just stand there, look at each other, and hold out their wrists. WHAAAT!!

“I have no reason not to comply, I guess,” Cryo says matter of factly.

“Yeah me either,” David says as he complies.

The two are shackled and begin walking past the Cathedral doors as the guards begin laughing hysterically.

“Can you believe this?” the lady guard shouts. “TWO Summoned slaves! And they didn’t even fight back!”

“I know right!” the male guard heartily says. “There hasn’t been a Summoned sighting in 1000 years. Maybe they taste good?”

“EW NO! Summoned or not, they at least look human. They probably taste like rubber.”

Now might be the time to mention that the guards are both Dragonborn, and Cryo and David, happen to be the only Human adjacent Summoned in the guild. Dragonborn don’t usually eat other humanoids, but from what I’ve heard, they aren’t even above eating stale hot dogs off a busy market floor.

Behind the guards, David and Cryo are both shaking in their boots. They look at each other and give this knowing nod. You see, that seems to be a signifier of yet another stupid action to be taken. Suddenly, David swiftly dislocates both of his thumbs dropping the cuffs with a large clank. Cryo stares in confusion, as if that wasn’t the plan, and tries to do the same thing. He fails, screams in pain, and the guards dogpile on top of him. David sees this as an opportunity to escape and runs away, leaving Cryo behind. What a teammate, why am I here again?

The guard towers begin to search for David, and I can only keep my invisibility up for so long. I think it's best I don't jeopardize the mission any further.

I am The Thomas Frewdenburg, and after stealthing around waves upon waves of guards, I arrive at the shop I spotted earlier. As I sneak towards the shop, I hear dozens of footsteps enclosing on my location. I turn around and David is running directly towards me. “How did he find me?” I ask myself before David slams directly into me, knocking us both over, and ending my spell.

“Thomas, where were you?” David asks.

“TRYING TO COMPLETE THE MISSION YOU SOMEHOW MANAGE TO KEEP SCREWING UP!!!”

“Okay buddy.”

I shove David off of me and survey my surroundings. Spotlights are atop of us, footsteps clamor all around us, and there is nowhere to hide. So we're screwed.

“I guess we have no choice but to fight,” David shouts as he readies his dinky quarterstaff.

“Yeah, A Bard and a Monk, taking on an army. Very feasible,” I retort.

A loud clank is heard out of sight. “Yeah, or you can jump down here!” a disembodied voice shouts.

Behind us is a suspiciously open sewer grate, not too far away. With no time to explain or think on the matter I take hold of David and jump down the grate. A figure behind us shuts it closed, and tells us to shush. A stampede of guards crosses over our heads and eventually dissipates. I strum my bandolin, and channel my music to cast a simple Light spell. A dopey looking boy is standing there, bright eyed. David jumps on my back and shouts “Thank you for saving me!” with tears in his eyes. Me and the boy shush him, and I shake the idiot off.

The boy sticks out his hand and says, “Hello, I am Belphor. I saw what happened in front of the Cathedral. I must say, a splendid way of managing to turn the entire city against you.”

“Yeah, yeah,” I start. I shake his hand, and his grip is firmer than I expected. His hair is short and curly, and his voice betrays how mannish he actually is. “You saved us, what do you want from us? You must've had a reason to stick your neck out for us.”

“Actually I do. It seems you were heading towards my father’s shop. I think we can make a mutual agreement here.”

“If it’s your father’s shop, I’ll just talk to your father.”

“You see about that, my father has been imprisoned.”

“Please don’t make me free him.”

“But if you free him, you can save your friend too.”

“So what. Do you know where Cryo is? Do you have an idea to reach him? Why should I even trust you?”

“Cryo is in the Cathedral’s dungeon, and these sewers lead to a faulty wall that directly connects to them, and you can trust me because you have to!”

“I don’t ‘have’ to do anything! I have enough to deal with without going on sidequests to save NPCs”

“‘Npcs’? Whatever, you won’t get ANY supplies if you don’t agree to help me!”

This kid has some spunk to him, but he’s still pretty dopey. I look at David and he’s playing with the ball of light I summoned like a house cat.

“Alright Dopey, I’ll help you. But only because I need the supplies from this list.”

Dopey takes the list, he asks, “Dopey? You don’t seem like the greatest guy.”

“I leave all the heroism and duty crap to Cryo, and we saw where that landed him. Before we save those two, I need to bring these supplies back and inform Gnomeo of the plan, cool?”

“Alright!”