25: The Order of Fate

As the three re-entered the cave to get whatever was left of the night for rest, Zen quietly asked Vo a question. The man's tones were slightly reticent; it made him pause and turn around to face him.

"Why do you care?" Zen stared at the roshi with an intense gaze, like he was waiting for something.

"Care?"

"These people. You don't know them." Zen cast an eye over the pitiful and scraggly looking sad lot for humans. "They would run you out of town without a backward thought for being syn."

Vo glanced over the sleeping folk, who had endured a torture no person should have experience. His mind wandered over his own pitiful weak self locked to chains with nefarious whip cracks to his back, all for being an exiled prince.

Back then, he was also weak with only his wits, luck and good people to save him. They sacrificed themselves so he could be freed. These people had been commoners, but they carried hearts filled with good and honorable intentions. Strong sentiments all royalty and rulers should carry more of when they hold other people's fate in their hands.

He laughed as mind wandered to recent times and his grand entrance into Rogue. "Well I was greeted to town by ten raised arrows aimed for my head."

"That's my point. None of those people trust a syn or anyone with magic. Everyone sees strangers with suspicion and distrust: passing judgment before any wrong doing has been done."

Vo nodded. Zen asked a question he hadn't asked himself once before, but he had long reached an answer.

"Why do you ask?"

Zen scoffed. "Ask? I mean, look at them. No one will miss them if those dark mages succeed."

"What do you think would happen if we weren't around to stop the nox mortre?"

Zen pondered over the alternative fate and shivered with no option looking good.

"I think I was asking you the questions." He frowned, returning his thoughts back to his question.

Vo heaved a deep sigh and stared at Lyndal sleeping soundly next to others.

"One life is a ripple of fate for another. The lodshen said this to me when I first sought sanctuary with them."

He faced Zen. "People are pathetic and shitty. Most can't see beyond their own wants and needs. The lodshen said that one of the hardest human values to understand and master is compassion."

Zen's heart raced. "Why?"

"After a lot of wandering, I came to see something of what they meant. Compassion demands a change in your own values. Only then do you have the perspective capable of understanding another. No human can do this unless they've stepped out of themselves."

"Is that why you care?"

"When I look at them, I don't see a commoner, non magic, magic... I just see one life who can impact the fate of another. And that life is important, no matter how the world around them designs their insignificance." Vo smiled when he added, "That earns my respect and care."

"And all those evil noxxy mages and your old imperial pal." Zen gulped at the switch in Vo's expression, which was a strong glare.

"They're the exception. When they chose to disrupt the Order of Fate, they lost their significance and place among the flow of life. Those pricks you can kill the shit out of them all you like: taming the order to relieve everyone else's misery."

"But didn't you tell the Lodshen that you make your own fate?"

"Making your own fate doesn't mean disrupting the flow of it. You dictate your own purpose and flow seaminglessly within the order; creating a new pathway."

Vo's expression eased when he lightly patted the man's back. "Get some sleep, Zen. We head back to Rogue. It's going to be a rough time to the end."

Vo assumed a spot near the entrance, eased down into his meditation cross-legged pose and closed his eyes.

Zen joined his side, but he couldn't sleep. His mind was mulling over the man's words. To be able to care for a stranger because you valued their contribution to fate and life, is that what compassion was? Is that why he couldn't carry the powers of the Lakshima because he didn't understand?

What is compassion?

Zen's mind picked and pulled at memories: his guardian's selfless care to an orphan nobody, Akari's selfless devotion to his well being...

Selfless. What does this even mean? I don't get it when people want to gain for themselves all the time. Zen's mind answered the contrary.

Akari standing before him to cover a blow: Vo carrying a woman in his arms while escaping a fiery explosion. Neither of them asked for anything selfish in return.

"But I can't do that," he whispered his doubt then snapped at himself for being stupid.

Realizing he was just sending his mind in circles, he closed his eyes and focused on a blank slate to sleep.