What Does Your Heart Desire?

LATELY, I’VE BEEN having nightmares of Seralind’s death recurring in my mind. And without her next to me in bed to comfort me, I’d always end up having Wilhelmina’s fur absorbing my tears as I cried myself to sleep.

The rest of the women don’t speak about Seralind in the cellar. They barely even give me much attention other than a pitiful smile. I was virtually invisible now, which wasn't as much of a bad thing as it was depressing.

It’s as though she’s a ghost now, a haunting memory to those who dare to dream.

I wondered if getting Seralind into the palace was worth this punishment. I have told myself again and again that the answer was yes, but whenever I saw Seralind’s despairing expression and blistering fingers, the torturous feeling of guilt never stopped clawing at my heart.

Oftentimes, I wondered if she was having similar thoughts.

What’s more devastating was that the Prince had yet to show any sign he was aware of Seralind’s whereabouts.

There were still stations set up around the city, as though nothing had changed. Soldiers still encouraged people to give them potential information. I hadn’t deliberately searched for whether Dame Ashton was at any of these stations, but I hadn’t seen her speckled horse or her signature frown anywhere since I had given her the comb.

Did Dame Ashton not hand over the hair comb after all? Had she thrown it away the second she got to the palace?

Or worse… the Prince didn’t care at all.

Is this what I get for trying? I think to myself as I scrub spilled wine on the wooden floors. I place the dirtied rag inside my bucket, wringing it out to get the last of the grime and juice out.

I felt slightly dizzy from exhaustion, and my braids had come undone by now. And without Seralind to do it for me, my now unruly curls fell over my back and shoulders. It made my work a little more difficult and my hair twice as dirty.

It also made me miss her even more, as it only reminded me of her absence.

Fragile.

I thought about what Seralind had said to me in the cellar. She had never used that word to describe the dancer house before. And it frightened me.

Was this what it was like to be her? Scared to want something better?

I had thought I’d grown out of daydreaming and ignorance. But it seems that I’d only fallen into old patterns and made a mess of our situation.

I’d destroyed everything Seralind worked so hard to build behind the scenes of her gentle hugs and playfulness. Now, we will remain here, working for the rest of our lives at the hands of Madame Whispet.

I wasn’t even sure what to do now. If Seralind wanted me to be docile and quiet, then I would be.

There really was nothing someone like me could do to change fate. I thought sadly, the hot tears blurring my vision.

Right when I sighed heavily, the entire dining lobby quieted down. The absence of sound was so prominent, I could hear my rag squishing against the floor before I noticed that I could.

I looked up, and all the adults—patrons and dancers alike—were wide-eyed and staring in the direction of the entrance. Someone must have entered, because a bell would usually ring. The commotion drowned out the noise, but now the echo of crisp footsteps filled the room.

I stood to my feet, curious as to what had captivated everyone’s attention. To my surprise, it was only a footman.

He had a head full of silvery hair, tied back with a black ribbon. His jaw and upper lip were ripe with white and grey hairs in a full beard, with a stripe of brilliant white down his bottom lip. His looks were complete with a moustache that had been curled elegantly at the ends.

Usually, nobles who entered didn’t come with their footmen, so whoever has must not be familiar with our establishment.

He’s nothing impressive… I pout to myself. Another figure emerges from behind him, and the footman steps out of the way.

Oh, he had been opening the do-

The rag falls out of my hands, landing on the floor with a wet splat.

It can’t be…!

“Crown Prince Cassian Saint-Portia!” The footman declared to the room, announcing the imperial prince’s arrival to the Plum Rosé.

I’d seen Prince Cassian in my past life perhaps only a handful of times, mostly through portraits scattered about the palace. But in person, paintings couldn’t capture the quiet radiance he displayed.

A tall figure with a chiseled jaw and dark eyelashes, Crown Prince Cassian Saint-Portia really did have the beauty of a rising dawn like Thalina had said.

He had a sun-kissed tan that complemented the pine green vest he wore, embroidered with fine strands of gold. His warm brown hair was like melted chocolate ended at the base of his neck.

Prince Cassian wasn’t dressed as flamboyantly as most noblemen. But even so, he eclipsed the faux luxury of Madame Whispet’s house with just a gold-framed emerald brooch pinned to his jabot.

Warm hazel eyes scanned the lobby, taking in the scene before him (and probably the mesmerized expressions of the people inside). Even though his lips were curled in a resting smile, I almost felt suffocated by the confidence and status he radiated simply by being in my presence.

She must have shown him the comb and brought him here!

My best idea was that he’d send his footman to come and fetch us, or even Dame Ashton herself would return to deliver the news.

I hadn't expected him to personally come here!

The ones who were able to come to their senses bowed or curtsied accordingly in his presence. Murmurs erupt like firecrackers, echoing in the lobby with stunned anxiety and interrupting the stilled air.

Dame Ashton appeared behind him with her signature frown, cracking the heavenly scene. The footman held the door for her as well.

The prince glanced behind him once she had entered. A smirk appeared, with dimples popping into his cheeks. Seralind said that dimples were created by fairies, who would poke an infant’s cheeks because they were so adorable.

“Have you grown weary from just a carriage ride?” He teased Dame Ashton, which I never thought I’d see that day. His voice was deep and light-hearted, like a harmony of cellos.

“I’ve grown tired of this, Your Highness.” She mumbled, straightening her back. “As far as I’m aware, romantic endeavors are not the concern of the Imperial Guard.”

“Hopefully our search will come to a close.” Prince Cassian assured her.

“Y-Your Highness!” Madame Whispet cried, rushing over to him and curtsying politely.

“How honored I am that you have come to my lowly establishment. Please, would you like refreshments, or perhaps wine? My girls can fetch you anything that-“

“We have reason to believe that the woman His Highness is searching for is here.” Dame Ashton informs Madame Whispet, interrupting her.

Madame Whispet didn’t even seem to mind being cut off. She clicks her fan open, looking amused.

“Is that so? Well, what great news!” She says. “But I was not aware of such things. I hadn’t received word that any of my girls had tended to the Prince. I apologize if her services were inadequate and have angered Your Imperial Highness.”

“It’s nothing of that sort,” Prince Cassian replied quickly. “I’d simply like to meet her.”

“Oh~? Unfortunately, all of the ladies that work here contractually belong to me. To meet one of them under my supervision—for any reason—requires payment.”

Is she really trying to get the Prince to give her money just for a simple meeting?!

Even Dame Ashton looked annoyed, but Prince Cassian’s face didn’t even expose a crack of what he could be thinking.

“Madame, I am willing to give any sort of amount that it requires to see her.” He insists.

This made Madame Whispet grin from behind her fan.

“But I’ve heard along the vine that once she’s discovered, you’ll be taking her to the palace. Is that true?”

Dame Ashton glanced at Prince Cassian.

“Yes, it is true.” He said without hesitation.

“Then I hope you understand I can’t have my workers taken away for free. I say this with respect, Your Highness, but I must be compensated if you wish to acquire my ladies for yourself. Their debts are quite high, but because of my loyalty to the crown, I’m willing to negotiate the price for the exchange.”

Hearing the Madame so shamelessly present a business deal to the prince made my blood boil. Now that she’s aware Seralind is the woman Prince Cassian wants, she could just keep Seralind locked up in the cellar and line her pockets for years if she plays her cards right.

In the previous timeline, Prince Cassian represented a new life. Something happened that destroyed it, but from what I’ve learned, the future can be changed.

Besides, I’d already faced the most frightening thing of all; my beloved sister dying in front of my eyes. And after what I’ve seen, after what I know, how could I give up?

I wiped the tears from my eyes and took a deep breath.

Be brave, Esmeline!

“Excuse me!” I cry out, raising my hand and interrupting their conversation. “I know who you’re talking about!”

I squeeze my way to where they were talking, trying not to think about the eyes watching me or Madame Whispet telepathically trying to make me turn into dust. I curtsy politely before addressing the prince.

“I’m the one who brought Dame Ashton the hair comb. The woman from the ball is my older sister!”

“Oh, but I made it clear to the Dame that she is but a fantastical liar.” Madame Whispet interrupted me. “She has trouble discerning what is real and what is-“

Prince Cassian raises his hand calmly, but with furrowed brows.

“I’d like to hear what she has to say.” Prince Cassian says to her sternly.

The Madame curtsied politely, but I saw a glimpse of her lips pursed in rage.

Prince Cassian kneels in front of me so we are somewhat eye-level. Seeing him so close made me flustered. But I couldn’t lose face now, especially when I’ve publicly defied Madame Whispet.

“What is your name?”

“Esmeline!”

Prince Cassian’s eyes widened ever so slightly, as though that was not what he was expecting.

“Esmeline?”

Prince Cassian looked up at Dame Ashton, who only stared back at him in confusion. I lifted my head high, banishing the feeling of timidness. If I was going to preserve my sister’s future, I had to do so with confidence.

“I can bring you to her right now. B-But you have to promise me something.”

Prince Cassian looked shocked at my boldness, but then the corner of his mouth tilted in an amused smirk.

“Please, tell me. Your wish is my command.” He responded playfully. The shine in his hazel eyes twinkled ever so slightly.

I’m counting on it!!

“You have to promise that we’ll be safe, okay?”

At my request, Prince Cassian’s eyes softened.

He put a large gloved hand on my wrist tenderly. The leathery fabric was cold to the touch.

“If your sister is who I’m looking for, then I can promise you not just safety, but every little thing that your heart desires. Do you understand?”

I was quiet from the weight of his words. I swallowed the lump in my throat and nodded, as my mouth was now dry.

“That is what my heart desires, Your Highness.” I replied earnestly.