Aftershock

"You are welcome for the help" Lucy talked with Rafael through the communicator.
Rafael awoke from his state of shock, only passed a few seconds since he killed the fugitive, but for him, felt like hours.
"Don't move yourself too much, I can see that the ARC's back was pierced by something, Vladmir is coming to help"
Rafael almost forgot about the drill bit in his back, the other person's blood in his hand was more worrisome for him. Vladmir arrived, quickly analysed the situation, the family was safe, and the fugitive, dead. He got the dead body and Rafael's gun with one arm, the ARC had strengh for that, and with the other, went help Rafael.
"At ease soldier, I'm not sure how deep that drill penetrated you, so it's better for a medic to take that off, for now, just lean on me" Vladmir helped Rafael to get out of the building and carried him until the transport, back to base, where he could have a medical attendance.

Back at base, in the medical bay, Rafael was treated, despited the look, his life was never at stake, neither his movements, yet, Rafael still hadn't got discharged.
"Heey, families's hero" George came visit Rafael "Damn, that is not suppose to be the expression of someone who got shot in the back and got out almost unharmed"
Rafael had an emptiness expression in his eyes, like something was wrong with him, or the city, or both. He looked at George, without the ARC suit, he could see his blond, short and messed up hair, blue eyes and a gentle face, still, Rafael didn't find anything to talk.
"It's okay, you must be tired, I'm sorry. Ugh... when you be able to leave, if you want to find me, I'll probably be in the recreational room" George smiled and left.

"He shot those bombers without hesitation, perhaps he already had killed in the past" Rafael was thinking as he carefully leaned back into the bed.
"how can he... anyone do that so easily? Someone like you, alive, breathing and you just..." Rafael now was staring at his hands "Like a monster"
Rafael looked at the grey roof, one of the lights was burned out "Did Marcos, or my dad, ever killed somebody?" He sighed "Well probably, my dad is a militar since-"
A doctor arrived, interrupting Rafael's thoughts "here, I will change your bandages and discharge you" The old lady was really kind "I would recommend to you to not move yourself too much in the next few days, but they want you back as soon as possible. I could only manage to get you free today and tomorrow, I'm so sorry"
"Don't worry, it's okay, I appreciate all your efforts for me"

After he got discharged, Rafael was felling lonely, since he got there, he hasn't been able to find his brother or his father, and he was not allowed to go out to see his family, in fact, he could only go to the dining hall, recreational room and the dormitories.
He wasn't tired or hungry, so went to the recreational room, it had a some sofas, a table tennis and a pool table. Almost every private who wasn't on a mission, was there, Anna was sitting on a quite distant sofa, eating a piece of cake, Rafael headed there,  but out of nowhere, George arrived first.

"Are you more calm now?" George gently asked while sitting next to her, yet, she didn't answered.
"It is quite a shock, to see it all for the first time, specially when someone is screaming for you to do the same" she kept not answering him, but she stopped eating, and could be seen tears in her eyes. Rafael leaned in a column nearby and kept on listening.
"Sorry, sorry, wasn't my intention to make you cry, it's just that... anh... why did you joined the army? Like, you are not even close to be prepared for any of this"
"I-I just want to make this city a better place" Now Anna started to cry "My parents always wanted me to become a militar, for the privileges we would receive, and I thought that here, here I could make a difference. But we were ordered to-" Anna was trying to hold her cry to keep talking "You guys were killing at cold blood people in name of safety and order, that was just carnage, how that is for a better city??"
George offered her a tissue for her to wipe her tears, and calmly replied "Anna, don't mix things up, there is a war waging on. On one side, the population, who had enough of this government pretending to act for the best of Promise, and on the other side, the govern, who believes that it still is the best for the city and wants to contain the insurgencies. And the problem with wars... is that people always die, no matter what."

Everyone was chatting and playing games, no one heard their conversation, in exception of Rafael, hidden behind a column, after a while, Anna stopped crying and raised her head.
"What should I do?"
"If you don't want to be part of any of it, stay hidden in your house, wait until it's all over praying for it to not find you" Then, George who was casually sitting on the sofa, looked into her eyes "But if you want to fight for the best of this city, you must pick a side and-"
"But how??" Anna was almost holding her heart "how do you guys fight this war? How you manage to kill so easily?"
It was a question that Rafael was also desperate to know the answer, how to take away all emotions, memories, bonds, dreams of someone, because that what killing is. How to fight a war when the thing you hate the most is war.

"Every time you have to do something, but your emotions tells you otherwise, have clear in your mind why you are doing it"
George remebered when he and his mother was on the streets, snowing and almost completely dark, as the sun was getting low and the lights were out, him shivering in cold, and his mother taking her last jacket and covering him, with a gentle smile.
"And just do it"