To Graduate from Highschool

I wonder how I can be truly happy.

That is the thought that passed through my head almost a year ago. It is a simple thought; however, there is no clear answer to it. I can’t figure out whether it is based on facts or reason. I can’t figure out what conditions I need to meet to obtain it. I can’t even begin to define what true happiness means. In the end, though, it doesn’t matter. Why? Well that’s simple.

That’s because, right now, I am…

“Lucas Small.” Whoops, now isn’t the time to be daydreaming. My name had finally been called to receive my high school graduation certificate. Mona and I both passed the finals with flying colors. Lego and Aito passed too, albeit just barely. Now, we were all on the roof, dressed in blue caps and gowns, sitting by our respective classes on the bleachers, waiting to be called up onto the makeshift stage. Mona and Aito’s last name began with A, and Lego’s began with E, so they all already received their certificate. Now, it was my turn.

The actual certificate handoff itself wasn’t anything special: you walked onto the stage, grabbed the certificate, shook the principal’s hand, and finally walked off. My handoff went no differently. The principal seemed exhausted when he handed me my certificate, so I gave a silent prayer hoping he wouldn’t pass out before the ceremony concluded.

After the handoff, you could either leave the building or hang around on the rooftop. The roof wasn’t particularly spacious to begin with: half of it was covered with giant fans while a remaining quarter held the bleachers and stage for the ceremony. That meant the students currently standing in the remaining quarter were basically shoulder to shoulder. This, coupled with the fact that all the students were all dressed the same, made it impossible to move around or find someone in particular.

After I walked off the stage, I spent a few minutes waddling through the gaps in the crowd, trying to find where Aito, Mona, and Lego were. Every time my shoulders and legs chafed against another student, I had to excuse, apologize, or ask to pass through. After another ten students received their certificates, I still couldn’t find where they were. I gave up in the end and tried to find a more open space to relax.

After pushing through for another few minutes, I found a nice spot where there were a lot fewer students: the roof’s edge. I put my hands on the railing and looked out. I could see the street I walked to get to school and the mall across it. I had only been to a mall a few times to go shopping with the others; however, I heard they opened a new game corner recently. Maybe I’ll ask the others if they want to go there after the ceremony. A soft smile crossed my lips as I thought back on my high school memories.

My school life initially wasn’t all that exciting. My freshman, sophomore, and junior years were a wash. I could sum up my school life back then into a series of actions: arrive, go to homeroom, morning lectures, lunch, afternoon lectures, club, leave. The class lectures were so boring that I ended up not paying attention after some point, getting me bumped down to class 4 in my junior year. I still remembered how much I studied and struggled to make it to class 2. A quiet chuckle escaped my lips.

My personal life wasn’t any better. Sometimes, I went to the kitchen to eat mustard sandwiches. Sometimes, I sat down at my desk and did whatever homework was assigned to me. Most of the time, however, I lounged around on my bed and stared up at the ceiling. I didn’t watch TV nor read a book. I just simply stared. It was so bad that I could remember how my ceiling looked in perfect detail. Even when I had to go to school, I put in the bare minimum effort. I wore whatever clothes were lying around and splashed my head with water to get rid of my bed head. Thinking about it now, it made me cringe. I felt extremely embarrassed.

Then, my senior year of high school came around. After Lego pulled us all into the Lunch Bringer’s Society, I started to have a lot more fun. I competed against Mona in clubs and competitions, losing spectacularly most times and winning only once or twice. I played with Aito in a talent show for the whole school to see. Lego…well I didn’t do anything particular with him, but it was still fun! As a group, we went on adventures to malls, parks, and other places. They made me laugh. They made me smile. Occasionally they teased me, but it never felt like they were trying to hurt me. Before long, I started to genuinely enjoy hanging out with them. We had all become good friends.

And now, it’s time for that to come to an end too. After this, high school was over. Mona was heading off to a prestigious university in a different country. Aito had gotten into a fine arts college. Lego was going to attend the local community college. This might be the last time we see each other for a long while. My expression became downcast. However, that didn’t last long.

“There you are!” Lego wrapped his arms around me from behind, lifting and spinning me around. “We were looking everywhere for you!” Mona and Aito were one step behind him.

“Did you really need to swing him around?”

“Of course! How else was I going to surprise him?”

“Ergh.” Mona brought her hand to her face, letting on an exasperated sigh. Aito gave a little shrug, looking between Lego and Mona.

“Hey, it’s fine,” I said, giving a strained smile, waving my hands. “At least he didn’t throw me off the edge.”

“Oh, come on! You could get a panorama of the view!” Lego then turned and looked off the roof's edge, seemingly staring at nothing. After a few moments, Mona and Aito also walked up to the railing and stared off. We stood there for a few moments without speaking a word, watching the cars roll by on the street beneath us.

“The school year’s over, huh.” Lego was the first to break the silence. A soft smile played across his lips. “Never thought it would be so exciting.”

“The time flew by.” Mona spoke up next, wearing the same expression as Lego. “I wish it would’ve lasted longer.”

“Mhmm.” Aito nodded along in agreement. She held her head high, wearing an expression mixed with happiness and sadness. We stood in silence for another few moments.

“Well, we always have phones! Plus, we can try to meet up when we’re all back in town for holidays and such,” Lego said, wearing his familiar playful expression.

“Oh? That sounds good. We can even take the time to properly improve your baking skills,” Mona fired back with a teasing grin.

“Hey! My cooking skills aren’t that bad!”

“Compared to Aito, you are below average.”

“Argh!!!” Mona and Lego continued their banter back and forth. Aito watched on in silence; a nostalgic smile danced across her face. I watched on, no longer feeling downcast. Instead, a satisfyingly pleasant feeling spread across my body.

“It was fun, right?” A genuine smile crossed my face as my emotions were laid bare. Mona and Lego stopped their bantering and looked towards me. Aito followed suit. Then, they each gave me a genuine smile back.

“Without a doubt.”

“Yeah.”

“Mhm.”

“Okay, now how about we get a photo?” I grabbed Lego’s and Aito’s arms and pulled them close, wearing a playful smile. Lego noticed what I was doing and grabbed Mona’s arm to drag her in. I let go of Aito’s hand to grab my phone out of my pocket. I opened up the camera and held it out in front so that everyone was in frame.

“Ready?”

“Yeah!” “Yes.” “Mhm.”

“Okay, 3.”

“2.”

“1.”

Snap!