Alone in the Crowd

Yuki simply smiled back at Haruo. There was something he felt upon the words. It was subtle, but it seemed like there was a connection made. Yuki could be pleased with that for the time being.

A wind blew through them echoing the silence. The windows of the house that they rested near rattled a little with its attention not reaching anyone. There was a large tree that had clearly sprouted up from Yuki’s imagination with it feeding around two of the houses and cement property wall. Its sudden growth hadn’t cracked or destroyed the wall rather it was vivisected at the base of the trunk. The large extended canopy provided the two boys with ample shade from the unguarded sun.

Chapter 77 – Alone in the Crowd

Nearby around the stretch of houses Yuki could hear the distant murmurings of voices from the students on their lunch break. It made him remember that he had left in the middle of his food. It had only been by chance that he had seen a group of boys.

Ever since he cleared out the fog around his repressed memories he changed his decision. Fighting or taking the beating wasn’t the issue for him any longer. He had the strength and ability to do something, but wasted it on fears and uncertainty. Helping those in trouble was paramount for him even if he had painted it over repeatedly with excuses and empty reasoning.

He no longer needed to hide.

The brief scuffle with the street punks made him feel good. Yuki discovered something new. It was different, but felt natural as well. He felt grateful to Haruo for the moment. ‘I’m going to keep trying with him. I think I might have a chance this time!’ Yuki took a firm nod in affirmation before standing in front of Haruo. “I’ve decided!” Yuki's excitement only managed to get a long and questioning look of annoyance from Haruo. “We’re going to be friends!”

Haruo managed a bit of a twisted look of confusion as he became very still. ‘He’s decided?’ He understood Yuki less the longer that he listened to him. The only thing that seemed to be consistent was the unexpected. ‘Why? …Friend?’

The word hung in his mind like a haunting tune. Even Mr. Asanuma, he saw as a teacher or at best an acquaintance. Yuki’s bold declaration confused him. There was something he couldn't explain that seemed almost curious. The sensation was beyond his words to describe.

“So you hungry? I know I am! I was starting lunch when I came out to help you. Haruo?” When he figured out that Haruo didn’t catch anything he said, Yuki reached out touching his shoulder. “You in there, Haruo?” It took a moment for him to come around. “You want some lunch? We’ve got plenty back at school. I bet Saki will be surprised to see you!”

The only response that Haruo gave was silence. It became a little colder after Yuki spoke about the school leaving Yuki a little puzzled. ‘Haruo is certainly a man of few words. I don’t think I’ve seen anyone this quiet before.’ Yuki was going to get an answer out of him, that he was certain. “You’re pretty strong looking. You could probably help out with the school if you want as well. I was surprised by how many of the students actually turned out to help. What you say, Haruo?” Yuki stared over at Haruo with the expectation that he was going to get a reply.

He had seen the school earlier and planned to avoid it. ‘Why’s he being so persistent about this?’ Haruo tried to move out of the way, but Yuki countered him with each step.

Eventually, it came down to the two almost glaring at each other hardening themselves to the standoff. Both were refusing to give up their positions. Haruo was used to having patience to outlast others, but this was the first time it was seriously being put to the test.

“…No…”

It was such a brief answer that Yuki had nearly missed Haruo even speaking, being caught up in being a roadblock. “Why?”

Haruo refrained from speaking again, figuring that it would be enough. A part of him however started to feel like changing that after the way that Yuki was acting. Something reacted on its own, not even going through his layers of filters. “Because I don’t like being in crowds.”

“Huh? But you’re at school anyway during the week. It’s the same people!”

“I tolerate it while at school.”

“I see…” The answer made Yuki come up with even more questions. “How come you don’t like crowds?”

“It’s a long story…” Haruo replied, becoming a little distant like he was being distracted by something.

Yuki looked around the grass street that they stood in. There was nothing he could find though. A thin light ring spread out from his feet that produced two wooden crates each placed behind them. Yuki sat down and looked up at Haruo’s questioning stare. “Thought you might want to sit. If you don’t like the crate I can come up with something else.”

A raised eyebrow was all that Haruo gave him. He knew what it was that Yuki was implying without having to ask him. He might have been a little too forthcoming with answers. Despite the feeling of being cornered for the story, he wasn't really as reluctant about it as he thought. “This stays between us.”

“Yeah!”

Haruo adjusted himself a little, catching the bordering excitement from Yuki. “The reason comes from my time at the orphanage…” He had already been working on collecting his thoughts.

‘…I’d been in an orphanage for as long as I could remember back then. It had been that way since I was abandoned by my parents, left alone. I was so young then I can’t even remember their faces. I don’t know if they’re alive or dead and I honestly didn’t care. They’d left me alone.’

The orphanage that Haruo was put into was in one of the poorer areas of the city. It had very little funding to support the number of children that stayed. Often they had to steal and beg just to get enough food for the day. It caused the children to band together to look after themselves.

Katsu was a teenage boy about the age of fourteen. Haruo was only seven at the time. He had been running the orphans since Haruo had been in the orphanage. The only other boys that were closest in age were four years apart and that ended up meaning a large gap in strength. Katsu ruled by force and anyone that did not obey his orders learned not to make the same mistake a second time.

Child Haruo came back one afternoon with several others of the boys his age. They all wore ragged pants and shirts covered in dirt, rips and stains. ‘Having good clothes wasn’t really something that we worried about. It was more important to be able to survive.’

As with all days before it, that afternoon was no different for them. They came back with the day’s earnings. It was like it was being called work even though they were just handouts or stolen. ‘I stuck with just begging rather than trying to steal. I had seen what had happened to a few of the children that failed. It wasn’t something I wanted to tempt.’ The group that Haruo was in walked over to Katsu to hand in the money.

Katsu leaned against the largest tree in what was considered the front yard of the two story brick orphanage. A fading brick wall surrounded the entire building with barbed wire on top. The front yard was littered with dead plants and trash. It proved to be an entertaining arena for the younger more imaginative children in spite of the danger.

One of the ten year boys, who was the right hand man for Katsu, stepped out of the small group of orphans. He extended out a roughly patched together box meant to appear to be a chest. “The money from today, Katsu…”

The teenage boy looked over at the box and grabbed it quickly. He flipped up the lid and shook the contents a couple times to count up the money. The lid closed sharply with a whimpering dull slam. “This is even less than yesterday!” Katsu glared down at the kid using his height and build to easily intimidate him.

“B-b-but there w-weren’t many people out today!”

Katsu raised his fist without stopping to punch the boy for speaking back to him. “No excuses! Yer not getting any food today!” He hefted the box under his arm and walked away from the boy, who was knocked over into two of the smaller eight year olds. “Maybe hunger’ll give ya motivation to find a better location!”

Haruo kept to the back when it happened, having learned to stay out of sight. Once Katsu was far enough away he helped the fallen up. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Katsu walking up towards the main door of the orphanage. There was an adult coming out as though he was on a schedule. Katsu met the head of the orphanage. The two briefly exchanged words before Katsu handed over some of the money earned.

‘Katsu continued to help line the pockets of the adults working at the orphanage while we saw no change in the condition. It took me a while to realize that the money was just being pocketed rather than getting us food or new clothes. It was just the way things were; everyone was selfish. It was the only way to survive.’

Night finally fell on the orphanage meaning that it was meal time for everyone. The meager servings were their second meal of the day. The only other meal they would receive was in the morning. If they ate anything else it was because they got it out in the city. Everyone crowded together in a single large room on the second floor; the first floor was exclusively used for the adults and Katsu. It was Katsu that gave out the food and especially tonight to ensure punishment was dealt.

The crowded room fit everyone on the floor with barely enough space for their arms to move around. Only Katsu made sure that he had plenty of breathing room for himself. He watched everyone before starting to work on his large portioned meal that was still mostly just bread.

Thinking that it was safe being crowded out, Haruo tried to give a little of his food over to the older boy. Haruo thought he had been secretive enough, but Katsu caught what he did in an instant. He was standing over a seated Haruo looking two or three times his size. “Punishment means no food kid!”

He quickly rammed his foot into Haruo’s stomach knocking the wind out of him as well as some of the bread he had been chewing on. Katsu did the same to the boy Haruo tried to help until he dropped the bread. “If ya givin’ it anyway ya must not be hungry, kid!” The little food that Haruo had left was taken away from him and Katsu marched away leaving both of them hungry.

Haruo nursed his stomach still feeling the stinging as he crumpled on the cold floor unable to move. The other boys turned away not wanting to make eye contact with Haruo. They understood punishment clearly enough.

‘When we slept we had to share the few rooms available. We always crowded together and others just held on close. It was crowded wherever I went. Those were the lessons that I learned. I was young and naïve not understanding what the true nature of people were, but I learned.’

A twelve year old Haruo stood at the entrance of the orphanage that had been his personal hell for his entire life. It was spring and nearly time for the new school year. He looked back at the building in determination that hardened his features.

‘I was certain that I had to get out of that place. Up until that point the orphanage had been my guardian and paid what little it tried for my elementary school. I was determined to go the rest on my own so I didn’t have to return to that place. But there was one obstacle still in my path…Katsu…’

Katsu blocked Haruo’s way out into the city. It had only been on the last day Haruo had been at the orphanage that he told everyone that he was leaving. When Katsu found out he showed up. After Katsu was old enough he left the orphanage, but used all of the orphans through the force of his small street gang. In Katsu’s mind Haruo still belonged to him. “Where’d ya think yer goin’?”

“I’m leaving…” Haruo responded almost empty of any feeling. The years had stripped him of most of his emotions and his determination was the only thing left. It removed any fear he had for Katsu. He stood up to Katsu ignoring the height difference.

“Looks like ya found a sense of humor, kid!” laughed Katsu, as two other teenage boys showed up behind him, both at least seventeen. The rough and cold look in their eyes made it clear that they were not above breaking a little kid. “Yer stayin’!” Katsu threw the first punch that Haruo took head on. It wasn't enough to knock him down to Katsu’s surprised, but he didn't stop. The other two boys quickly joined in the fun until Haruo laid on the floor a bruised and bloodied mess.

Eventually, Katsu believed he got his point across and left with his message given to Haruo. Haruo’s defiant eyes stared out at the cloudy sky as he lay on his back.

‘Nothing was going to stop me. I left that day and never returned. I was going to walk on my own. I needed no help any longer…’

Haruo looked back up at Yuki with his tale coming to a close. It was like the floodgates opened, the words couldn’t be stopped. “I don’t like crowds because it reminds me of the crowded orphanage and how selfish people truly are.”

It took a few moments for Yuki to take it all in. ‘I thought I just asked why he didn’t like crowds. I didn’t think I’d get a life story out of him. Was all of that necessary to tell me? But it certainly explains a few things.’

Yuki stood up from his crate feeling his legs getting a little antsy. He stretched his arms and arched his back until he felt everything was worked out. “But you know not everyone is selfish, Haruo. It’s a little closed minded to make a generalization based on a terrible environment from your childhood.”

Haruo remained quiet after Yuki’s words. Yuki was never going to understand. ‘It’s time to leave…I’ve said far more than I should have…’

“I found ya!” yelled a familiar voice laced with barely controlled rage. Takaoka stood half a block down the grass street with his boys from his gang along with several more shadowed figures behind them.

Yuki could tell immediately that the guy had eyes for him, probably revenge. ‘Seems they’re back and with even more this time. Not that’ll matter…’

A new figure much older than Takaoka stepped out from the group, standing a few footsteps away. It was a young man in his early twenties with a slicked back hair style that ended at the back of his neck. He was dressed in a heavy leather jacket and dark blue jeans with a white and red shirt underneath. The way that the others in the gang acted he was important despite looking a little higher class than the rest of the mess. “Long time no see…kid…”

Haruo tilted his head over his shoulder feeling that the voice was distantly familiar. It only took a single second for him to immediately recognize the man. “…Katsu…”