Chi-Cha time Part 1

Okay, okay, okay, okay…

I’ll go home with you bitch…

Or that’s what I at least said in the circumstance considering there’s no changing her mind.

Pimples, Dr. Boobs, and I are on a boat an hour and 45 minutes in on the trips and…

IT’S FUCKING BORING!!!!

Nījima Cha-Cha?!

FUCK YOU!!!

No wonder you’re sleeping in the Blowhard’s office. You live in nowhere.

I just want to either throw my clothes off and go skinny dipping or punch and kick everyone who is on board, something to stave my boredom.

Well, Dr. Boobs at least let me get my junk together from my lair in a duffle bag. Not that she really liked being in Kabukichō of all places, Pimples was really clinging onto her arm for safety.

At least I was able to guide them away from any drunks or streetwalkers who’d try to pick a fight or rape them, I grew up in this neighborhood after all. Taught myself how to fight, how to steal, where the good places are, all of that good shit. It eventually became my stomping grounds where everyone practically was afraid of me but time to time tried to challenge me. That’s only more suckies for me.

It can be fun fighting streetwalkers, they sometimes have nice tits to grope and navels to lick out of. I even sometimes find good food or money on them for me.

Although I was curious to see what’s outside of Kabukichō, and that’s how I met Beachball.

“So, you excited for a change in scenery?”

“Like I fucking know or care. I mean you’re really tempting me to just jump off the boat and swim back to my lair…”

“Don’t…!”

……

“Don’t be so apprehensive bitch.”

“We may need to rework that vocabulary of yours, not everyone exactly appreciates swearing.”

“OH CUM ON!!! It’s my language and I can say whatever I fucking want!!!!!”

“Mon…”

“I’ll even say all of the swears I know out loud for while this barge to hear!!”

I take a deep breath and-PLAP!!

DR. BOOBS?!

I just turn to see she was shaking her head.

She then removed her hand from my mouth.

“Let’s change the subject, I heard you’re asking my son a lot of questions. Just what did you ask?”

I smiled at that notion, “Oh, just what I could normally ask the fuck out of him, does he like Dragon Ball, does he like cheeseburgers, does he like ramen, does he like any hip-hop…”

“We live on an Island with limited access to the outside world.”

Huh?

She giggles…

“I hope you like having practically no Internet! Because that’s what living there would be like!”

WHAT!!?! REALLY?!

But how am I going to watch my lesbian threesomes?!...

“Although to answer some of your questions, my sweetie pie really mostly eats what I cook him…”

“Oh ya! And what do you cook him!?”

She smiled and giggles again, “Perhaps when we get to my house I can made you one of his favorites?”

Okay, just what the fuck does she make?! I bet that it’s some weird shit worse than Princess’ cooking.

I think I’ll try to text Beachball, hopefully there’s some connection

I use my tail to get my iPhone, and open up the text message app.

“Hey girl, on World’s Most Boring Fuckcruise line right here! Sup?”

I see the loading screen, her text appears, “Kinda am going home, was rather fun today. I’m almost jealous that you and Hibari-chan are with Chi-Chi-sensei and not me. Although still LMAO at Cha-Cha wearing bloomers!!”

I laughed too.

I mean, what the fuck were you thinking Dr. Boobs?! Did you not have any other options?!

“Well now that we know that he’s one of us, would you say that you want to get that cherryboy to explore you?”

I then a vomit emoji, a scared face emoji, a face with look of triumph emoji, and a thumbs down.

Really girl? You’re fucking not interested?!

I see another text, “Katsu-nē, I just like only met him yesterday!! And Ikaruga-san want him to avoid socializing. How’s Hibari-chan?”

You know, what’s happening with Pimples? I look up from my phone to see her ecstatically running, hopping, bōncing, and cartwheeling along the railing…

WHAT THE FUCK?!

Has she even been on a boat let along seen on before?

I could laugh right now!

I tug on Dr. Boobs’ arm and point to Pimples.

Looks like she’s gonna climb on the raili-PAP!!

DR. BOOBS!! HOW THE SHIT DID YOU GET OVER THERE?!

She has a panicked expression on her face while she holds onto Pimples while she struggles, “Hibari want shiny! Hibari want shiny! Hibari want…!”

She then grabbed Pimple’s other arm

“I’M NOT LETTING ANOTHER BABY FALL OFF THE RAILING!!!”

WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!??!! BABY!?! That’s what you’re calling her? And by another…

Do you mean…?

OMFG!!!!!

“CHA-CHA FELL OFF THE BOAT!!!! HOHOHOESHISHSIHSIHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! WHOOOOHOHO!!!! HAHAHAHA!!!!”

“How is it funny to you?!”

“Is he cursed or something?! Hahahaha!! I mean he wears bloomers and he’s klutz like pimples! And I’m sure it was quite a show of you diving off the railing!!!”

“That was when he was around half of Hibari-tan’s age.”

“STILL FUCKING HAPPENED!!!!! AND I’M LAUGHING MY ASS OFF!!!!! ESHISHISHISHISHISHISHAHSHAHASHASHA!!!! Whoever knocked ya up must have been a real motherfucking loser to have a kid like that!!!”

“Katsuragi, your attitude could be worked on as well.”

“You know, may be instead of grabbing keeping ‘baby’ from the railing, why not throw her off the railing, throw your clothes off the railing, and then…”-SLAP-

I again felt the anvil, but this time…

IT WENT ACROSS MY FUCKING FACE!!!!

I felt pain, I tasted blood!!

My bod went hard on the floor, it even cracked it a little.

I attempt to get back up.

“WHAT THE FUCK BITCH…!!!!?”

“Don’t ‘what the fuck’ me; if you keep this up then it’s more spankings and no dinner. Now if you let me patch that up…”

There’s no bitching there, I’m a bitch who needs to eat after all.

And I’m lucky that I can go to Akira’s sushi-ya to eat when I want.

Before that it was really as said before garbage and stealing to eat, hell one of the reasons why I went from defending against streetwalkers and drunks to attacking was to get their money or food if they had it. I WAS FUCKING HUNGRY!!!!!!!

At least Asuka’s very old man cooks good, I can only hope for Dr. Boobs to do the same.

After making port

Well…

Sonsaku Cherryboy does not live in a shithole.

I mean I look around and it’s a pretty small but ordinary dock

There’re cranes, there’s a parking lot, a barrier for some reason, a pick-up hood, a road that leads to the island, and some building that I think is where they’ll tell you shit.

To my left there seems to be an area where I think they keep the boats, and ahead of me is the main island which appears rather rugged and covered in trees, I can’t see shit beyond that. And also…

IT’S TOO FUCKING QUIET!!!

Did you really need to be living in this sleepy island in the middle of nowhere bitch?!

Anyway, Pimples seems curious, I see her just trying to pull out of Dr. Boobs’ grip.

“Let Hibari go! Hibari jump in water!”

“No!”

“Hibari jump in water! Hibari jump in water! Hibari jump in water!”

“Can you swim?”

“Bitch no,” I remarked, “I’d say sekirei swim better than that bi…”

“Eh-hem!”

“What?! I’m just giving an answer.”

“Just know that in my house you follow my rules!! There will be some things I will allow but the main point of me taking you in is the refine you into a better kunoichi, please remember to empty the contents of that duffle bag when we get inside.”

“FINE!!” I roll my eyes, “Just make sure you can cook good, otherwise I’m bitching out.”

Dr. Boobs smile, “That it? Well come along then…”

We then started walking, she offered me to hold her hand like she is doing with Pimples but…

No way bitch…

I let Dr. Boobs have my phone though since maybe there’s some shit to distract me. We first though went through a main town and you know…

There were couple of people selling fruits and shit along with a couple of restaurants.

“Hey Dr. Boobs…”

“Hmm?”

“What sort of restaurant does your kid like?”

“We actually go to the next island over for that, and on special occasions. He really loves Kankoku Ryouri, I try to make my own but he likes it better from Yakiniku Takeuma.”

Do you really need to wear out your old lady of all people for that?

There were also couple of people, staring at us…

Okay, what the fuck?

This is so weird! Have they never seen people from the mainland before?

We continued walking to this intersection that had takenoko growing on each side of the road, and this road really seemed to not end and went back and forth and all over the place with Pimples continuously asking, “There yet?”

I was getting fucking bored too, although it seemed like we’re on the top of the mountains and we passed by what Dr. Boobs called Fujimitōge tenbō-dai where she claimed that we’re halfway there.

More walking…

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!

Okay so we continued walking and I think about ten minutes later we come across another intersection where we went westward from the road we’re on.

We pass by some electrical plant buildings and shit and I start to see…

Tanada?

Or I think are tanada…

I don’t know, I’ve only seen things from Beachball’s picture books.

“There yet?!”

“Almost, those are the tanada that Cha-Cha and I farm on and soon you’ll too.”

“Farming? Is this the training that Dr. Boobs wants me to do?”

We soon come up upon a lone bōsha with the roof hanging over. There was a clothes line on the side where I think some towels and sheets were blowing in the breeze along the side of it. On the other side of the road of the house there looked like a Hahaoki There were a couple of small windows along the sides of the house. Some were open, and by where I think was the entrance there was a row of some hooks with wooden blocks hanging over them.

There was some writing over them, wonder what they say?

I quickly run over, grab one of the…

FUCK!!!

KANJI I CAN’T READ!!!!!!

“Monkey!!! You’re not going to mix up my appointment slots, are you?!”

Appointment slots, you mean?!

I better put this back before I get a thōsand years of ass-pain.

The two then come to the entrance. “Well have you gotten some interest in how I arrange appointments?”

“Kinda, I mean it’s kinda weird. Don’t doctors normally keep their appointments on paper or something?”

“Well this doctor owns a rice farm and can be outside a lot after all. I also find it useful for patients who come up here to check when their appointments are. I could tell you couldn’t exactly read the kanji on there but are you able to read to read the kanji above the blocks?”

Above the block? What the…

I do as she says and I see…

Kanji that can read? I’ve seen them on Asuka’s calendar…

“Are those the days of the week, nichi, getsu, ka, sui, moku, kin, and do?”

“Hai! And the kanji on the block are the names based on the time slots. Speaking of why don’t we look at kayoubi’s.”

She takes one of the wooden blocks in her hand and points to it, “See right here, I was at Hanzō today so I have 8 to 3 marked down as ‘at Gakkō’,…”

That’s true, the ‘gaku’ kanji was there a couple of time at least. And beneath that was…

“Um… Doctor Boobs, Pimples and I already got our check-ups, right?”

“Hai,”

Then why are we still marked down here?”

And more importantly how the fuck did even mark us down?! It’s a fucking long boat trip after all, don’t tell me that you wrote down to see us at Hanzō and it appeared on here?

“Well on the premise that you two didn’t exactly see a doctor a multiple number of times I may need to perform more tests…”

“WHAT…?!”

Dr. Boobs made a shocked expression.

I mean…

I can’t believe it!!!

FUCK!!!

“You’re going to fucking prick me again?!”

“Well…” she slides the entrance opening and grabs my hand, “not exactly.”

Okay, what the fuck is this bitch going to do?!

I try to resist and get out of her grasp only for it to be useless.

Again, SHE SO FUCKING STRONG!!!!!

I kinda wonder where she’d be on the top 10 shinobi.

I was dragged to a separate room on the right side of the house, it looked very much like a doctor’s room. I think the exam table was same one from before. She takes off me and Pimple’s shoes.

“Dr. Boobs, what the fuck do you mean it’s not exactly a prick?!”

“Perhaps I should show you…” she takes out of one of the drawers a small container with paper on the back of it, in it was A NEEDLE!?

I mean it looked like a needle with the metal point and all but it also had a tube and some plastic connector with rubber flaps on each side.

But needle or not…

I’M BITCHING OUT OF-PAP!!

“I’m only trying to help you, and the way you’re acting won’t benefit you in the long run.”

“OH COME ON!!! I HATE GETTING PRICKED!!!! Pricking me in my sleep I can accept but not this!!”

“I’ll be gentle with you, maybe it will help if you sit on my lap while I do this?”

“Hibari get that too?”

Pimples is nervous and confused

“Actually, just wait on the sofa outside.”

“But Hibari hungry…”

She grabs Pimples by the upper arm…

“COME ON!! I’ll see if there’s something in the fridge.”

I follow them up to the doorway, I see Dr. Boobs seating Pimples on the aforementioned sofa and opening the fridge and taking out, mochi?!

She then sees me, “What are you doing there!? Get back and wait on the table if you want to eat later!”

ALRIGHT BITCH!!!

Fuckdammit, you wanted me here after all.

I get back onto the exam table and Dr. Boobs come in a minute later.

“So first things first, I need to get the test tubes out…”

She then washes her hands and takes out of own of the cabinets a whole ass-tons of weird containers out, the sort of looked like tubes but they had different colored caps and came in different sizes.

This can’t simply be a big prick to the finger, will it?!

“Um…what the fuck are you going to dooo?” I said nervously.

“I said this was similar to getting pricked, although I’ll be to your arm instead…”

Arm?

She puts gloves on,”…more specifically your elbow joint, it won’t be as painful but I need you to stay still if this is to work.”

She brings the tube-thingies to the table and sits on the table.

She gestures to her lap, I guess she really meant it by sit on her while doing this.

I do as she says sit sideways on her lap, she’s surprisingly soft to sit on, a can’t help but want to snuggle with her, although should a 16-year-old be really sitting on a middle-aged woman’s lap?

“Are you rightie or leftie?”

“Rightie… (But fucking barely)”

“Then give me your left.”

I do so and she pulls a rubber strap out and around my upper arm…

“WHAO! WHAO! WHAO! WHAO! WHAT THE FUCK!!! Why so tight…”

“To do this correctly, now make a fist and squeeze.”

I do so although I don’t know the fuck why she’s asking.

With one hand holding my elbow and the other with the needle she starts gently prodding my inner elbow. What’s she feeling?

She stops, this vein’s good enough…

Vein?

WHAT THE FUCK’S A V…

NNRG!

She stuck it in me before I could ask!

Also, about the pain…

“Is it that bad?”

“Actually, I’ve walked off getting brutalized by Princess, cops, and other hoodlums. This isn’t exactly as bad but…”

“You still wish to not be stuck, it’s only I was afraid of it to and also sticking other patients. But let’s continue…”

She attached one of the tubes to the needle thingie and…

Is that my blood?

It feels kinda weird seeing it go up the tube and fill the container. Why does my head light?

“Try averting your focus if it makes you feel that sick…”

O-OKAY!

What to focus…

What to foc…

Your tatas!!

You know I can’t help but admire them.

YOU GOT GREAT TATAS DR. BOOBS!!!

They’re huge!!! You know when I say that the person that you got knocked up with was a loser, perhaps having you to fuck should make him somewhat of a winner!! Just how many times did you tit fuck him? And how much cum did he get on them?

I’m actually really wanting to squeeze them now, see just what…

“Don’t think about it!!”

SHIT!!!

“I’ll let you grope me…”

“REALLY?!”

“if you ask first!”

Party pooper!

“UUhg…Alright bitch!”

“We’re almost done, just this one more tube…”

She connected that tube, it filled up with blood.

“And we’re done!!”

She took the needle out and tied the band. See then wiped off the cut and then pushed a cotton ball and wrapped some bandage around my elbow.

“You’ve been a good girl”-CHU!!

SHE KISSED ME!!? This dampness on my cheek is weird.

“What? You never have been kissed before?”

“Not really in a while, I don’t think I remember.”

You can go wait outside, I’ll start making dinner when I’m done with Hibari-tan.

Alright then…

I slide off her lap and walk out to the living room.

“Yo Pimples…” she turns to me, I throw my thumb back, “the bitch wants ya.”

She squeaks and goes over to the exam room.

Well the couch is mine and since Pimples was pigging out, I’ll catch some Zs instead.

Hopefully Dr. Boobs doesn’t cook crap.

I don’t know how long I dosed off, I only woke when I heard some, whimpering?

I sat myself up to see Pimples trembling on the side chair with Dr. Boobs cuddling her and…

“HOT DAMN!!!! What the fuck did you do to her?!”

“It’s an allergy intradermal test, it is common for those with Autism to have gastrointestinal based allergies. Cha-Cha has allergies to gluten and casein and also certain worms and insects. Looks like Bloomers has a similar case.”

I guess that it’s similar to what I got but, did she stick her several times? Her whole upper arm is bandaged and covered in ice.

“It hurts, Hibari hot…”

“You’ll get better by tomorrow, don’t worry.”

Better that just close my eyes, hopefully I can eat.

I soon though awake to the sound of percolating.

Something cums up nose, something real fucking good!! It’s like somewhere between miso, fish, and the salty spray of the ocean. I open my eyes, I think I know what it is. Dr. Boobs is in the kitchen area with a large donabe on the stove.

I slowly walk-over to see…

RAMEN?!!

“Figured as much you’d perk up at this, heard from my friend that you love it. It’s my own special recipe, I’ve cooked it several time for Gohan while keeping in mind of his allergies…”

IT LOOKED SO YUMMY!! Are there any hashi here? I gotta have a taste!!

I open one of the cabinets…

“Eager to eat, are you?”

She stops stirring and looks at me incredulously, “What?”

“Unload your bag in the hallway…”

FUCK!! I forgot all about that…

Oh well, might as well get it over with.

I walk over to the now closed entrance and unzip my bag open. I then flip it and let the contents fall out…

-SWOOSH-

“Okay, you brought porn here.”

“SO?! It’s my junk after all! There’s not just porn in here.”

I grab a volume of Dragon Ball from the pile.

“Okay, so you do have some taste.”

“Hibari read…”

“NO!!” we both said.

Fuck, I’m I becoming Dr. Boobs now?!

Anyway the bandaged Pimples just shyly sat back onto the side chair.

“Look Monkey, I implied that I’ll try to be more lenient with you but there will be somethings that I won’t tolerate. I will be somewhat tolerant of you to be having porn, but this may be too much. And did you steal all of it?”

SSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!!!!!!

“I-I-I-I um-um-…” She was giving a glare, it seemed to pierce me make me quiver, “NOT ALL OF IT IS STOLEN!!!” I blurted out.

Dr. Boobs sighed, “Go eat, we’ll try to sort out your stuff in the morning.”

I then see on the counter two rather large bowls on the counter, must be for Pimples and me.

Not wanting to make her raise an eyebrow I slowing walk myself to the counter to my meal still quivering.

I look into my bowl to see…

Black ramen?

There was also ebi, ika, nori, maguro, tako, hotate, moyashi all in a rich black colored hot and steamy broth that creeped up my nose of a nice fish smell. I never seen this type of ramen served to me before.

Should I even eat this? It looks and smells too good to eat, although I’m unsure about the black ramen.

“Well, are you going to eat it, otherwise I might as well…”

“NO!!” I take the hashi by my bowl, “I’ll eat it!”

-BA-DUMP- -BA-DUMP-

I grab the black ramen with my hashi and bring it up to my level.

-DOKUN!!

-DOKUN!!

-DOKUN!!

I feel the spikes of adrenaline in my chest, my arm in trembling, my heart is beating

Why am I like this?! It’s just ramen!

I think I’ll close my eyes before I eat it.

I do so, I open my mouth.

1…

2…

I stuff it in my mouth, I sensation envelops my tongue. I tasted of salt but also of a mild savory flavor that made me want more. The ramen itself had a nice chew to it but was easy enough to manage.

-TSURUTSURUTSURU!!!

I swallowed the strand; I then tried the other things. A wonder sensation of tastes danced on my tongue, I ate more and more to continue feeling it.

And then…

I stopped…

I desire to eat was replaced by a welling within my body, like it felt like something was missing in me but yet I felt warm and tingly inside.

I had a smile on my face from how I really enjoyed my food, but yet…

I couldn’t help but suddenly try to recall my life before I was thrown away.

I lived in a family of three, my Haha, me, and our inu Cocoa.

Cocoa was like a Deutsch Sha Pei who was my first friend. We wrestled together and played in the mud together and even took baths together.

As for me, I always was a troublemaker, running naked through the house, climbing into cabinets, clobbering my Haha, swinging with my tail on the banister, and falling down the stairs.

My Haha loved to be rough with me, she tickled me like crazy, she swung me upside-down, she threw me into the air, she wrestled with me too, and gave me really tight hugs.

We were happy but then it all ended.

I can’t exactly remember when it happened but it was a very hot summer day and we were having a picnic.

I was exhausted from wrestling Cocoa and running through the park so I took a nap cuddling Cocoa.

However when I opened my eyes, I was napping under the shade of a tree with a bag next to me. Neither Haha or Cocoa were around.

I ran around the park trying to look for them but with no luck. I soon then see a passerby, I came up to him to ask where Haha and Cocoa are. That was a mistake…

For when I asked the passerby about them and he returned with a lecherous smile, shit started to get really bad.

In comparing my situation back then to now, it was too much to hold back.

I felt my eyes welling up, my nose staring drip, and tears running down my face, and…

“BWAAAAHAAAAAAAAAHAAHAAAA!!…IIIIIBWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAAAAAHAAAAAAAAAAAA…!!!!”

“Oh, come here…”

She then picks me up in an infantile position and snuggled me on the couch. He hugged real tight and caressed my back, she was nice and warm, I couldn’t help but sob into her boobs.

When I had calmed down somewhat, “Talk to me cutie…”

Huh?

“What’s wrong?”

I look down at myself and I her…

All of this time, I’ve been living a life of motherfucking shit of brawling, stealing, brawling again, wondering about my next meal, and what would I eat?

The only hot meals I ate were burgers and ramen, and they were occasional if I had just the money.

But now that someone has actually ramen for me out of the goodness of their heart and not simply out of obligation, I can’t stop smiling. Should I mention that this is the best ramen I ever had?!

I only could blurt out one thing to Dr. Boobs, “WHY CAN’T I HAVE A HAHA LIKE YOU?!HOHOHOHOOOOOOOOO!!!”

Tears started to well up in my eyes again, I then bearhugged her with all my might. I don’t think I’ll be able to find someone like her! All of this time I had been looking out for myself and mostly not caring about anyone, and now…

SHOULD I GIVE THAT UP!!!?!!!!

After I calmed down again, I looked at Dr. Boobs again in her now half soaked chīpao, “You better?”

“I don’t know…”

“Go finish your meal without welling up again, perhaps we can cuddle up to sleep?”

REALLY?!!

A grin appeared on my face, I kissed her the cheek and rushed to my meal.

It was about half-eaten and still pretty warm, I got on to finishing it, but not before looking at Pimple’s bowl.

It was still full and she was staring into it, “What’s wrong Bloomers? You haven’t touched your meal.”

“Looks weird. Hibari tried drinking but burned tongue.”

“Then use your hashi.”

She gave a confused look, “Ha-shi?”

Really Pimples, you don’t know how to use hashi?

“You know what, how about I feed you instead.”

Dr. Boobs then walks over to Pimples and while taking the hashi gets some of the ramen,

“Say ĀĀHHHH!!”

“ĀĀĀĀĀĀĀĀHHHHHMMNN…”

Whoa! Dr. Boobs baby feeding a 14-year-old!! I gotta tape this and sent it to Beachball. Hopefully I can finish my meal too.

The original chapter was too long for the chapter creator to handle, hope I don't have to split chapters up to often