A Thief

“Long time no see.” I lean on the cart, trying to be relaxed and charismatic.

“It’s only been a night, you miss me that bad?” Sofía wrings out all of my cool, and I am left looking dumb.

“W-well, y’know I…” It hasn’t been a minute and I'm already being torn to bits. “What’s up with the costume? I don't see Samuel anywhere.”

"Just a habit, especially when I get into an anime watching mood. Samuel, I dropped him off at my mother's place earlier. He's staying the night there."

"So you're in this 'anime watching mood' quite often?"

"When it's such an inspiring and beautiful character as Lily, who mind you is the second strongest hero in the Reaction universe only beaten by the MC, who isn't even recognized as the strongest. I Just have to dress like her every once in a while."

"Is my jacket part of this Lily character's inspiring and beautiful look?"

Sofía looked down at what she was wearing as if she had forgotten.

“Oh, it’s um, I was hoping to run into you so I could give it back.”

I was a little suspicious, maybe in a more imaginative and hopeful way. Like, say she was really wearing it because it was my jacket. Maybe she missed me more and really was projecting. At this point I didn’t want that jacket back at all. She can wear it all the time if it were up to me.

“Sure you didn’t just want to keep it for yourself?” I joke around, pretending to ignore the possibility.

“And if I did?”

“Oh…” I scratched my head. “Then you’d be a thief.”

“No.” She came up to me, opening up the jacket to flaunt it. “I’m asking what you’d do.”

“What I’d do?” Some wicked urges were bubbling up to my tongue and itching to leave my mouth, but I swallowed it down and regained my composure. “Nothing, I guess?”

“Nothing?” Sofía rested her hand on my chest. “What a shame.”

My heart was pounding, and I’m sure she could feel it, which only made it intensify. “A shame?”

Sofía pulled her hand away and turned her back to me. “That thieves like me can get away so easily.”

“It’s just a jacket. I’m not gonna go out of my way to get it back. Besides, I willingly gave it to you for the night.”

“But I’ve taken more than just your jacket.” She glanced at me with a devious grin.

“Huh?” I check around for my wallet and phone and they’re still on me, so that wasn’t it. “What did you take?”

“That wouldn’t be any fun if I told you. I’m sure you’ll pick up on it eventually.”

From behind me, the sound of a crashing bag could be heard every so often. This whole time it had been there, but I was too distracted to notice. Then it dawned on me that I had not been watching Imani during the entire conversation.

“Imani?” I turn to the sound of another crash.

I stood frozen at the sight of her. She was trying to be sneaky, tossing an assortment of snacks up and into the cart while Sofía was grabbing my attention. This conversation was all just a ruse for Imani to load up on junk food. Now I know why the aisle was so colorful.

“Imani you can’t eat all of this!” I dig through the cart, picking up all kinds of sweets.

“Yes I can!”

I hold up a small bag of sour gummies. “Even a single bag of this stuff would make you sick. No human even at my size could eat half of what’s in this cart.”

I proceed to collect the snacks one by one from the heap in the cart.

“But Sofía has even more!” Imani points.

For a moment I looked back at Sofía’s cart which was packed with all kinds of snacks, but before I could truly analyze the sheer amount she had built up, she moved the cart out of sight to cover it up.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Sofía acted dumb.

“I’m sure she has a very good reason.” I defend Sofía. “Like, a party or something.”

“I want to go!” Imani ran up to Sofía and tugged at her costume.

“Ah, well it’s more like a uh… watch party.”

“A wash pwardy!” Imani spoke in awe of its name.

“Oh but we shouldn’t intrude on something like that, it might be very adult, Imani.” I start to place snacks back into the shelves where they belong.

“Well, it’s not very adult so-to-speak. It’s anime, and just me. So, not a party?”

“What’s anime?” Imani looked to me for an answer.

“Um, well… it’s like—“

“It’s like cartoons.” Sofía answered for me.

“—cartoons! Yup, cartoons. Like that yellow sponge thing on TV.”

“I wan to wash anime!” Imani hopped around with excitement.

Sofía was delighted to see Imani’s eagerness to watch anime. “Oh, then why not come over? I know a show we can all watch."

I was in disbelief with how open she was. “Us? At your place? Are you sure?”

“Yea it’s fine, you lost twice at thumb war, and you can’t even catch a jacket thief.”

“Yes I can, I just don’t feel like it, and I was just going easy on you that day."

“So you’re sparing me huh? Think you’re really tough don’t you?” Sofía started to size me up, although not to any intimidating effect because of her short stature.

Hearing Sofía’s provocations, Imani had to challenge her. “Papa is tough, and can catch you!”

“Want to bet?”

“Yea!”

“What are you betting on?” I was helpless to their plans, and my voice didn’t reach them.

“If you win, I’ll give back the jacket and pay for your cart. If I win, I keep the jacket and you have to pay for my cart.”

“Hello? I’m here too.”

“You’re on!” Imani and Sofía shake over the bet.

Another game, and this time it was a chase in Walmart. There was no way I’m going to run around like a kid in Walmart chasing down this woman dressed as some character from an anime. Are you kidding me? The very moment this game starts, I’m going to stand perfectly still.

“Ready? Imani pointed to the ceiling. 

"Ready!" Sofía prepared to run.

"Bang!” She sounded off an imaginary starter pistol, and Sofía skipped away.

As still as a statue, I refused to follow her. Not even the taunting voice and motions could make me budge. The only thing that was getting to me was the amount of embarrassment I was soaking up as people walked past us.

“What are you doing Papa? She’s right there!” Imani pulled at the leg of my pants to get me to move.

“Yea Carmine. What are you? A cow-ard?” Sofía shook her rear at me with each syllable.

“Stop it, there’s people here trying to shop.” I hid my face behind my hand and hunched to reduce my existence.

Things could have just ended with my loss once again, and I’d accept the bet's losing penalty, but Imani gave me puppy eyes, and this embarrassment as Sofía would run circles around me, was eroding my soul.

“Can you please catch her Papa?”

“Oh no the jacket thief is getting away!” Sofía spoke with a dramatic voice, resting the back of her hand on her forehead. “If only someone who isn’t a coward would catch her.”

The emphasis she put on ‘coward’ and my daughter begging for me to play along was powerful, and I quickly hit my breaking point. I started to walk towards Sofía, and when she saw me moving, she hopped out of sight around the corner of an aisle. The pursuit for a so-called jacket thief had truly begun.

At each corner I’d get a glimpse of her smug face, and following behind as a spectator, Imani would command me to go get her with every sight. We would go through every part of the store; clothing, tools, cleaning supplies, and more, and at each aisle progression I’d pick up my pace.

People were looking at us like we were crazy, but if I were to be honest, this was kind of fun, and the embarrassment was alleviated by the thrill of the hunt.

“Oh!” Sofía stopped.

She was cornered in the cold section. Her only ways out; the row of frozen food or the row of milk, were easily interceptable by me. I closed in as she considered her choices of escape, and it was clear on her face that she had little to no way of making it out of this. Every second only reduced her chances.

With a dash she made her way along the wall of milk, but I was ready for it the moment her eyes looked that direction. I jumped into action and closed the gap between us until I was within reach. With a loud wham, I pinned her in place, having one arm block her direction, she pressed her back against the cold glass of the display refrigerator.

“You got me…” Sofía submitted.

We were both fatigued. Sofía’s twig crown was about to fall off, her hair was a mess, and a tiny amount of sweat dripped from her chin. Neither of us were exactly unfit, but I work at a desk almost every day, and she’s dressed up in probably the least athletic wear possible. Don’t even get me started on those distracting extra weights she’s carrying around.

“Was there even a timer, or an end goal? It’s like I had to catch you no matter what.” I took deep breaths. “We just ran around the entire store for some one-sided bet.”

“It was fun though.” Sofía smiled, then groaned as her knees started to give.

She slid her back down the refrigerator till she hit the ground to rest, and I sat next to her. Imani, who followed at her own pace behind me, had finally caught up.

“Did you catch her papa?” she ran up and hopped into my lap.

“Yep, I won.”

“Yay!” Imani hugged me.

Cooled by the cold floor and even cooler refrigerators behind us, we exhaled a relieved sigh.

“Nice kabedon earlier.” Sofía patted me on the shoulder.

“What is that?”

“Don’t worry about it. Just know it was my first time, and I never thought it would feel so cool IRL.”

“IRL? See when you say stuff like this, I have to know.”

Sofía giggled. “It’s funnier when you don’t.”

“So you like making fun of my naivety?”

“No.” She rested her head on my arm. “It just makes you cuter.”