Embarrassment, Laughter... Maybe Both At Once

Saturday, July 13. 9:15 am.

‘’Sup,’ Crystal waves, once again occupying Yan’s usual corner. ‘Good thing you actually came.’ In her hand is a manga volume, but Yan can’t really see the cover art from his distance. Unlike the first and second encounter, she appears to be more dignified, completely different from her usual vibe. Her round glasses, when paired with a beige hoodie and plaid skirt no longer give a sense of immaturity, instead giving the feeling of reservedness while maintaining a casual appearance.

In comparison, Yan is just the usual him: t-shirt, jeans, running shoes, perfect to be an extra in a movie.

‘Hi,’ he says, feeling a mild sense of nervousness. ‘So, uh, what did you want to show me?’

As he walks closer, he half-expects Crystal to just shove the manga in her hand to him. Instead, she puts it back on the shelf and looks at him in the eye, her hands empty and open.

Please don’t tell me it’s—

‘Nothing,’ she smiles. ‘I just wanted you to come to the bookstore.’

‘Ah. I see,’ he says monotonously. What kind of reaction is he even supposed to give? Shock? Disappointment? Confusion? At this moment, his mind is just blank, filled with nothing.

Just as Crystal said. She showed him nothing, and he received nothing. As a result, he can only respond with nothing.

What an anticlimactic moment.

‘So,’ she continues. ‘You wanna read together?’ She takes another manga volume and flops down on the floor, her hair fluttering for a bit before it rests on her shoulders.

‘Sure, I guess.’ He slowly sits down next to her and hugs his knees, making himself as small as possible to not bump into her. But as he bends his knee, a quick pop sound makes its way out, disrupting the quietness of the corner for a second.

‘What was that?’ Crystal laughs. ‘Those weak ass knees… What are you, a grandpa?’

‘I— Whatevs.’

‘Sit closer, grandpa,’ Crystal beckons, and before Yan can even react, she grabs him by the wrist, pulling him until there is no longer a gap between the two of them. Yan instinctively tenses up, the unfamiliar physical contact making him quite uncomfortable. For someone who flinches even when a relative accidentally bumps into him, this is undoubtedly something far beyond his comfort zone.

‘You can see the book properly, right?’ she asks.

‘U-Uh, yeah.’ He can see it properly… just that he cannot comprehend the words when his mind is completely devoted to attempting to shut down the sense of touch.

Satisfied, Crystal begins flipping through the pages, entering the unknown fictional world without him. He can see it in her eyes, the eyes of someone trying to focus, immersing, drowning herself in the sounds of fantasy. Meanwhile, he struggles to even enter the gate, his mind preoccupied and distracted, the words a blur to him.

‘You good?’ Crystal’s question throws him off guard, his head subconsciously backing away for a bit.

‘Y-Yeah, I’m good. Sorry if that was distracting.’

‘Nah, I’m fine. Just as long you’re ok as well.’

‘I’m ok…’ Even as that blatant lie leaves his mouth, he tries to convince himself that it’s the truth, that this is simply another Saturday morning of reading, just that now it’s with a new friend.

Calm down, calm down…

Repeating the two words in his mind seems to have helped. He breathes softly so as not to disrupt her, his body relaxing so he can enjoy the atmosphere of the bookstore once again, even if he can’t enter the world before his eyes.

Just calm down and let time do its thing…

Gradually, his mind returns to his usual state, his body now used to the formerly uncomfortable contact. As his senses relax, he finally begins to properly read the manga—

To see a pale, ghastly, deformed face— no, several faces staring right back at him, their empty eye sockets digging into his soul.

He flinches, accidentally bumping into Crystal’s shoulder.

‘You good?’ Crystal asks again.

‘I-I’m fine,’ Yan hurriedly replies. He is, in fact, not fine at all. A hard-earned sense of peace, only to be immediately shattered by some otherworldly horror manga panel. It feels almost like a sick joke.

‘You got jumpscared?’

‘Not… really.’

Crystal suddenly bursts into laughter, lightly slapping his back in a teasing manner. ‘Dude, the way you freaked out is just HILARIOUS!’

‘I didn’t freak out or anything,’ Yan tries to maintain composure.

Crystal grabs his wrist again, her thumb pressed down to check for his pulse. ‘You sure about that?’

He can practically hear his rapidly accelerating heart beat. The sudden contact is messing with him again, the heart going into overdrive, his brain panicking and sending erratic orders to the rest of his body.

‘I… just got a bit shocked,’ he stubbornly tries to fight back, ignoring the fact his ears are already turning red from the blood flow.

‘... Nah, that’s cap. That’s so cap.’

‘I… I…’ Sure he might’ve been a little jumpscared, but at this point, he’s sure it’s Crystal who’s messing with him more. Thankfully, before his blood pressure gets too high, Crystal releases her grip, looking at him in amusement.

‘Fine, whatever you say,’ she says, her smile seemingly holding back another round of laughter. ‘That reaction was still so fucking hilarious, though…’

Yan sighs. ‘Bruh,’ is all he can manage to say at this point.

‘Now, back to reading,’ she announces seemingly to herself while giving Yan a look he can only describe as confusing.

—

The couple hours pass by quickly. Despite being made fun of at almost every single jumpscare, he oddly finds himself relaxing more and more, even liking it sometimes when Crystal points out his subtle, instinctive reactions. At this point, he no longer feels any discomfort sitting in such close proximity, instead enjoying the moments and emotions in the bookstore as he used to alone, whether it be fear, embarrassment, or happiness. Eventually, he even starts laughing at Crystal’s own reactions, causing mini cycles of teasing between the two at each other’s expense.

Unlike the usual quietness of reading, the two find themselves poking fun at each other, filling the corner with bits of chuckle and laughter until the last page of the horror manga is read. As Crystal closes the book, Yan realises they may or may not have defeated the purpose of reading horror by laughing at each other almost every other page, filling that terrible world with fun laughter instead of frightened silence. A bit insulting, even.

Oops.

‘Dude, what were we even doing?’ Crystal at this point is just a laughing machine, giggling even as she stands to put the book back on the shelf. ‘I swear this is supposed to be peak horror, but what the fuck were we laughing at?’

‘Each other,’ Yan chuckles.

‘EACH OTHER!’ Crystal laughs even harder, ignoring the fact that she’s in a public space.

‘Wait,’ he halts her before she can insert the book back at its original place. ‘I’m gonna buy it. Just for shits and giggles, I’m gonna buy it.’

‘You’re finally buying something from here now?’ she remarks.

‘Yeah! What a historical moment, am I right?’ he sarcastically replies. ‘Ok, seriously though, I feel I needa buy at least something from here after visiting it so often.’

‘Now you realise.’

‘Don’t make me look like I’ve just been loitering here the entire time!’

‘Yeah, like the rat you are.’

‘Bruh, that’s mean…’

‘Ok ok, I’m sorry.’

‘I promise I’ll buy something every time here from next time onwards.’ Yan stands and receives the book from Crystal before heading off to the cashier.

‘You better remember that.’

‘Uh, hopefully I will.’ With a boop from the octopus card machine, Yan puts the book in his bag and heads for the exit.

‘I’ll remind you, don’t worry! You’ll come next week, right?’ Crystal calls out.

‘Yeah!’ Yan replies in a similar volume. ‘See ya!’

‘See ya!’ The door closes, and Yan is once again back in the intense sunshine and heat of the stuffy outdoors.

He chuckles. For the first time since he’s been to the bookstore, he feels he had fun in that place. Not just enjoyment, but fun as hell.