A Woman Ate My Leg

They say the God of our world lives in it’s heart. That’s where I started. I’m not the smartest person in the world but determination and imagination can carry one through. I took a gamble and bought plane tickets to the Guara Islands which are located off eastern edge of the western continent and also happened to be located at the geographical center of our world, aka: It’s “heart.”

It was fairly crowded at the airport where I landed, it being the middle of summer and the peak season for vacationing in a famous tropical tourist destination. I grabbed a taxi and told them to take inland. The driver asked if I had a specific destination in mind, in a thick accent that I had trouble understanding. I knew a bit of Istaric, the common language here but not enough to make communicating any easier. I decided to roll out my map and point, it would be the easiest way to proceed. I was on a bit of a time crunch since I had to be back at school by Monday.

The driver raised his eyebrow and brough his finger to his chin at the place where I was pointing. He seemed like he had something to say but then just shrugged and put the car in drive.

I laid back in my seat and watched the palm trees and other seaside scenery whizz by. I didn’t know what would be awaiting me at the end of this trip; worst cast, I wouldn’t find anything; best case, I would finally get the answers I’d been seeking.

Eventually, the palm fronds disappeared from sight. The sun was near it’s zenith beating down with full force on at the white sand all around. The road came to an end up ahead.

“This is far as I take you.” He threw the car in park.

“Understood.” I nodded and handed him some money.

“Why do you come here? Nothing here, yeah.”

“That’s what I’m trying to find out.”

“Nothing here. Sand. Rocks. You find sunburn. You find Firemites.”

“That may be-”

“The water here not safe. You find Gapers out here. No small fish.”

“Gapers are troublesome, I understand, but I don’t plan on fishing or getting near the water.”

“Lace Fairies were spotted in the area-”

“Sir!” I shouted to cut him off. I appreciated him warning me as I hadn’t been aware there were so many dangerous animals in this area, but, again, I was on a tight schedule, “Sir, I know you’re concerned about my safety, I’m a high school kid from another country coming on my own to a dangerous, isolated area, but I swear to you I’ll be fine, I promise.”

He once again gave me the raised eyebrow pose from earlier as I stepped out the vehicle and hoisted my large bag onto my back. He shrugged then pulled out a piece of paper.

“You take. Call when need picking up. You have phone, yeah?”

I nodded.

“Good. Mèsen maial porsu morè esma aritral. Call.

“What was that you said.”

“Hmm? Yes, uh… I will worry.” He adjusts his mirror and shift into reverse, “Bad for heart.”

“muserè masar setanda larrè menisiento” He mumbles before driving away.

I was now left on the beach. Before me stretched miles of sand and tilted jagged pillars. I began my walk. It was barely ten minutes before I was drenched in sweat. I had done almost no research before coming here, I’d had a spur of the moment thought and grabbed tickets here on an impulse. Zero preparation was done. I packed two changes of clothes and some instant ramen from the convenience store and ran to the airport. It was only now that I realized I’d forgotten a key ingredient to both the ramen and my survival: water.

Twenty minutes later. I was beginning to wonder how much sweat the body could produce before you ran dry. The landscape hadn’t changed. As I waded across the sand, absorbed in my own stupidity, my foot started to slip. I was jolted into movement, throwing myself backward. An eyeball rose out of the hole that had suddenly appeared. It locked it’s gaze on me then retreated back into the sand. I had a really bad feeling.

In a split second I jumped to my feet and sprinted. I could feel the sand rising up behind me. The ground trembled slightly. It wasn’t easy to run in sand and my pack slowed me down forward. I could feel a humid wind lick at the back of my neck. I threw off my pack and picked up the pace, arms flailing wildly at my sides. I didn’t dare look behind me. I noticed some greenery up ahead, just beyond two upright columns. That was as good a direction as any.

I kicked off my right shoe as something tugged on it. I ran harder than I had in my entire life. I closed my eyes and breathed in as much Oxygen as my lungs could carry. I don’t know how long I’d been running for, it’d probably only been a minute or two, but eventually I crossed beyond the pillar. I kept on running even after the terrain changed and the feeling of pursuit vanished. I ran blind until…BAM!

I ran into a stone column.

I fell to the ground and opened my eyes, then closed, then opened, then closed, then opened. I wasn’t imaging things. I stood up and took stock of my surroundings. I was in a great hall of some kind. The ceiling stretched high enough that it should have been visible all the way from the airport. I hadn’t seen anything like this place anywhere along the route I’d traveled.

I turned around in a circle. I could see the pillars and the beach where I came from in the distance. Was this…magic? I continued turning and walking. I was on some kind of red velvet carpet. There were banners hanging from the impossibly high ceiling with some kind crest on them. They flapped majestically even though there wasn’t any wind. Actually, speaking of the air, it was cool in here. Did this place have AC? It felt so good! I continued up the path. The ground began to take on an incline. I could hear splashing water just beyond the peak. Water! I broke out into a run. I was deathly dehydrated by this point.

I reached the top and barreled ahead at the sight of an indoor pool. I had the sudden uncontrollable urge to dive in and drink the entire thing. I didn’t even notice the naked boy in front of me casually exiting said pool.

Before either of us noticed the other I slammed into him and sent us both careening into the water. There’s a boy! And he’s naked! There was a flash of white light.

“And now mortal what hast brought you to my temple!”

I was down on one knee in front of the boy who was fully dressed in some sort of ceremonial garb. I could have sworn I was just diving headfirst into the pool just now and there was this boy!

“Ignorance!” he shouted, “I am no mere “boy” I am…” he stopped as though he’d forgotten who he was, “I am a God!” How could you forget that you’re a god.

“I am a God!” Repeating it doesn’t inspire fealty, “You have entreated upon my temple for a purpose, have you not? Speak your request or be gone. I shall not ask again.”

I decided if he was who I thought he was then I’d found exactly who I was looking for.

“A-are you the god of this world?”

“I believe that’s how I’m referred to as.”

“Well, then I have a request.”

“Speak, boy.” Says the 12-year-old looking god.

“I want!” I didn’t think I’d actually find a real life God. I had confidence that this would be a fool’s errand, this was just another distraction to put off what I needed to do, and yet here he was.

“I want!” The moment I finish this sentence, it could become real. And the all the emotions I’d been holding in will spill out. What would I even do then? I hadn’t thought that far ahead. You chase something for so long…

“I want you to help me ask Margarine Bowery out on a date!”

“Right. Childs play for someone like myself…wait, what was that?”

“I’ve had a crush on her since forever but I just can’t ever seem to get the words out.”

“Uh, I’m not sure-”

“Please!” I rammed my head into the ground

“I’m not a god! I’m sorry!” The god mirrored my gesture in supplication.

I lifted myself up, “WHAT!?!”

Some moments later I was seated on his throne with my legs crossed, glaring down at the little brat as he cowered on the floor.

“Want to run that by me again.” I hissed.

“I’m a god. But I’m also not. My powers are limited. I guess I imposed limitation on myself, but as I am now, I can’t rightly claim to be a god.”

“Explain. Can you help me or not?”

“Okay, so, did your history books talk about the great war against the god of chaos?”

“Hmm. No, there are stories that have been passed down, but nothing officially written as history.”

“Well, so, the gods went to war using the humans as pawns, and not just humans of this world. I was summoned from another world. Back then we had things called Skills and cheat abilities and stats. These were all run by the Chaos God who was also the enemy we were fighting against for the most part. The Gods finally talked him into a cease fire of sorts as humanity and human civilization was nearing it’s end. Everyone had a vested interest in us and couldn’t afford to have us all die. They made the decision to all up and leave toward the end but the Chaos God wanted to stay, meddle, and observe. They couldn’t abide that so they hired the strongest of the human heroes to subdue the God.

It was a suicide mission to be sure but upon their meeting the God of Chaos had a proposition. He would leave this world with the rest of the Gods if the hero took on his mantle. The hero would gain the God of Chaos’s power and in exchange this hero would never be allowed to leave to go back to his world. The hero reluctantly agreed.

After the god left, the hero began to clean up the mess they’d left behind. He hunted down errant monsters, magical artifacts, and sent home any straggling summoned heroes. He repaired all the damage and cast a planet wide amnesia spell to rid any traces of the original gods and the war from people’s memories. In addition he also got rid of skills and magic. It led to too much division and infighting; humans could do that well enough without it. And with that he retired to a temple far from civilization where he could live out the rest of eternity IN PEACE.”

“I understand. If I take your story at face value, I guess that means you want to stay here, and would rather not grant my wish.”

“I honestly have no interest in relationship foibles among tribes or villages. I’m sure she is a beautiful girl but It has nothing to do with me.”

“You’re right, she’s beautiful.”

“Mm-hmm.” The boy had begun walking away. He waved his hand and indoor swimming pool disappeared and was replaced with a giant library.

“I can’t get enough of her caramel skin, or that vanilla scent that wafts from her curly pink hair.”

“Pink hair?” The boy mumbles.

“Or her long slender legs” I could suddenly feel an intense pressure coming behind the throne, “The way her school uniform hangs off her shoulders drives me insane.” The pressure was coming closer, “I can’t help watching her skirt swinging with her hips as she walks. She’s just-”

A warm breath tickled his neck, a shiver ran down his spine as he thought the monster from earlier had returned, “Skirt. School uniform.” It repeated menacingly. I turned around to find the boy standing with drool dripping from his mouth, “Is she… a…g-gy-gyaru?” He was practically hyperventilating. “I don’t know what that is.”

“Doesn’t matter. You know, I think I’ve stayed in here long enough. I think the worlds advanced further than I thought and it might about time I went and checked things out. It’s important to get outside every couple hundred years or so, don’t you think?”

“So, you’ve reconsidered.”

“I’m still considering, I need more information before I can make firm decision.” A suitcase appeared in his hand. “Shall we go.”

I was stupefied by the whirlwind of event that had unfolded in the past few minutes. The god was real and he seemed to be on board with my request. I didn’t think he’d actually be going with me. I thought he give me a love potion or make her fall in love with me with magic or alter my appearance to make me better looking, but he was actually coming back home with me. This was going to be tough to explain.

We approached the beach once again, I stopped in front of the two pillars. I could see the thing that was chasing me swimming below the sand.

“There’s a monster there.”

He tilted his head and snapped his fingers. The sand had stopped moving. After a moment a mess of bright red hair popped out. It was woman’s head. The woman growled and gnashed her teeth, her slitted yellow eyes pointed directly at me. The god stepped passed the boundary and continued walking up stepping on the monster turned woman as he went.

“C’mon. This will be the first obstacle, step over the monster that hounded you here.”

I took a breath. It popped back up. I stepped forward with all the confidence I could muster.

“Ow, God! Why! That hurts so much! I’m dying!”

“She really hates you.” The god regrew my suddenly missing leg as we waited for the taxi driver to pick us up.