Chapter 2 - Fleeting Everyday Life

The class is unusually noisy.

“What’s going on?”, she asks as if nothing happened.

“I don’t know.

As we near the door, the noise slowly dies down as if they were aware of our presence.

“Michael!”, a voice screams from within the classroom, causing me to stop in my tracks right before the door.

“W-what are you doing here, Alexis?”, I stammer, surprised to see her.

“I’m attending school, duh!”, she nudges my arm, completely ignoring the transfer student next to me.

“That’s what you’re worried about, Mikey? Can’t you see that something is different about her?!”, Kathrynn storms out of the room soon after her with her hands on her hips.

“Ugh… You two are always hard to deal with together. Can I just sit down? Today’s already draining as it is. Leave me alone for a while to regather myself.”, I mutter as I drag my feet past them and to my seat.

I could feel the countless eyes looking at me and weighing me down more than before, but I’m way too starved of energy to even do anything about it. Though even if I had the strength, I wouldn’t do anything anyway.

Slumping down on the table, I do my usual routine whenever I’m socially exhausted. Of course it isn’t complete without a strawberry muffin.

Just the smell of it is refreshing. But it’s not the same.

I couldn’t eat anything during lunch because we were on the rooftop. I’m not even sure if I can stomach anything at the moment. My mind is still muddled, and I can’t think straight.

I mean, who would be able to think normally after being dropped with such a bombshell?

She can’t hear my name.

She can’t…

What am I supposed to do?

Should I tell the others…?

I’m not even sure if they would believe me. They’ve got no reason to, and it would only further break my already crumbling life apart.

I’m… lost.

I lift my head from my hands and look around the room, filled with people, classmates I’ve been with for nearly a year, minding their own business. Chattering about the most random and pointless of things in their own little groups…

…completely oblivious.

It’s impossible for me to go back to my “life” before meeting her. The mysterious transfer student from one of the prestigious schools… a girl whose name I’m unable to know.

Why me? Why her? Why us?

It’s not like she said anything other than her inability to hear my name too. But the way she talked and the way she moved; it was clear to me that she’s aware of my similar inability to hear hers. But she was able to pick out even the most minute of details about me.

How was she able to notice such a detail in the first place? She was even able to notice my glances towards my favorite spot on the roof that even I didn’t notice myself.

Her eye for detail is far superior to mine. I will never be able to compete with it.

I wonder what I look like to her. I wonder if I’m nothing more than an open book with my life in full display. Meanwhile, I’m still unable to pick out a single detail of her that isn’t external.

All I have so far is that she’s from a highly ranked school, which only means that she’s on a different level from us country folk. But that’s already a known fact. She’s shrouded in complete mystery.

“You have to remember to blink, Michael.”, Alexis concerns, snapping me out of my spite-filled trance. “I’ve never seen you glare like that before. It’s new. It’s a different Michael.”

“Wha—“, I stammer, taken aback by her sudden cheeky comment. “If you’re going to talk about firsts, I’d say your cheekiness is one of them.”

Without her, I wouldn’t have realized my face all tensed and scrunched up.

“What’s up, Michael? Something on your mind? I’ve never seen you glaring like that before, if anyone else noticed you before me, they’d be scared for their life. Who’s got you staring daggers into them?”, she asks as she follows my eyes.

Lucky for me, I wasn’t looking at anyone in particular.

“That new girl?”

How’d she—

“You’re completely wrong. I wasn’t staring at her. I was just—”

“Oh I know you weren’t staring at her.”

She — played me like a fiddle.

“She was definitely on your mind! I was surprised to see you two together earlier. It’s strange to see you with someone different. A person of her caliber no less. When Kathrynn saw me looking around for you when I arrived, she told me that you gave the new girl a tour around.”

The usual air-headed Alexis reads me with such accuracy that I have to ask myself if she’s the real Alexis or not.

“Aha! I’m right, aren’t I?”, she beams with excitement, clapping her hands softly. “What’s up with her? What’s she doing clouding our mind like that? I’ve never seen you look so lost before too.”

I think… it’s better to tell her.

She’s probably the only one to understand and have any hope of believing me. After all, she’s my… childhood friend.

…right?

That’s what she is to me, so it makes sense for me to tell her what’s been bothering me.

Then… why am I resisting?

“She’s just… a strange person who transferred here with even stranger circumstances.”

That’s all there is to her. If I ignore the fact that we’re unable to hear each other’s names, then I won’t need to be so conscious of her. I can treat her like some ordinary classmate.

So then, why do I find myself looking into her eyes from across the room. She knew I was looking at her. Almost like she could sense it like on the roof.

“Oh? Is that so? Well if you say so. No point in forcing you.”

I feel bad for lying to her. But as it stands, I’ve got no faith in her believing my situation just yet.

I can’t even believe my own ears. I mean… if someone were to wake up one day and is suddenly unable to hear a name, only to be told that the other party is on the same boat, I’m willing to bet my whole life that they’ll be lost for words as well.

So my reaction to everything is natural. While her reaction, or overall lack thereof, isn’t. Her lack of concern and overwhelming curiosity can only be explained as abnormal.

And she’s dragging me down that path.

“I wonder where she’s going to sit now that I’m here.”

“Speaking of which, Alexis. What made you come here today?”, I ask out of my own curiosity, as well as a desperate attempt at keeping other things out of my mind.

“Am I not allowed to be here, Michael?”, she asks with sarcasm. “Did you want me to say that I wanted to come see you or something?”

“Ugh, why must you always complicate things? First, you failed to wake me up this morning, causing me to run here. Now, you’re overcomplicating things. Why must you be such a handful, all the time?”, I shake my head.

“I’m going to ignore that last statement, and is it my fault that you nearly overslept?”

“Need I remind you that you were the one to throw my alarm clock against the wall, screaming, “Only I should wake up Michael!”.”

“I—Uh—I don’t remember that happening. Are you gaslighting me?”

I tilt my head to the side and furrow my eyebrows.

“Aha, right. Okay, maybe I did do that… Well, anyway, I was busy doing some stuff last night. That’s why I wasn’t able to wake you up.”

Her eyebags are visible for all to see. Which is normal for her. But it seems off. There’s… makeup?

“Is there something on my face, Michael?”, she asks as her cheeks flush red, “Or are you looking out the window behind me again?”

I failed to realize earlier that my usual view of the window is back to normal. No longer being blacked out by the blackhole of that nameless girl’s presence now. The bright blue sky is displayed behind the empty background of Alexis.

I… never noticed it on the roof.

She — was all I could see.

And now—

“Michael…? Why are you crying?”

Huh?

I instinctively feel my cheeks wet and sure enough, there are tears rolling down them. Try as I might to wipe them away, the futility of which only reveals more of myself.

I can’t stop. They won’t stop trickling down. Why?

“Hey, hey, what’s going on with you, Michael?”, Alexis leaves her seat, reaching into her pocket and taking out a handkerchief she always has with her. “Here. Use this.”, she kneels down next to me as the noise of the classroom slowly muffles into nothingness. “It’s okay, Michael. Just remember to breathe. It’s okay. You don’t need to talk. You just need to worry about yourself.”

Alexis’ warm words coupled with the warmth of her hand resting atop my quivering hand quickly calms me. The shaking of my hand stops, but the mystery as to why there are tears streaming down my face is still on my mind.

I’m convinced that there’s no reason for it.

There’s just… hope that no one has seen me yet.

The thought of lifting my head and looking round to see everyone looking at me is terrifying.

I don’t want to look up.

I don’t want to—

“Hey, Michael. How about we ditch and go somewhere? Just the two of us?”, I lift my chin just enough to see Alexis looking right back at me with the gentlest smile I’ve ever seen.

Just like her lips, her eyes are smiling as well. Overwhelmed by emotions, I struggle to decide what sort of face I should make. That is, if I’m not already making one.

I wonder what expression I have.

Whatever it is, Alexis is still casting a smile, unaffected by it.

I wonder…

I wonder if it’s alright to talk to her about everything. She’s everything to me. She’s my childhood friend. The last person I could call my family.

“Alexis—”, I blurt out as her eyes begin to gleam. “I…I—”

She places her finger on my lips.

“Do you really think now’s the best time to say whatever it is you want to say, Michael? Can it wait until we’re out of the classroom?”

“Y-yeah…”

I don’t know what I was about to say. Though something tells me that it would have gone against my goal of keeping my life as is. I’m sure she got a vague idea of it too. Which was probably why she stopped me before I made a bigger fool out of myself.

She pokes my cheek and smiles again, sparking something inside of me.

When… did I start feeling this way towards her?

“Come on, let’s go!”