Awakening

“Please wake up”, are the last words that I faintly hear right before waking up in a cold sweat. It’s dark. I try to make sense of what is happening near me, but I fail. I try to get out of my bed as a cold breeze blows gently through the barely open window. The dogs are barking loudly, almost making up for the constant ringing sounds in my head.

“I’m thirsty”. After turning on all the lights , I hurry over to the kitchen to grab a cup of water. While passing a mirror, I get a weird familiar feeling, followed by a noticeable chill down my spine. I finally arrived at the kitchen. I let out a slight sigh as I space out looking at the faucet. “Something is not right. This is not who I am.” are the words that came out of my mouth. “What happened last night? Where am I? Who am I?”.

“Hm, the clock seems to not be working. I should go back to bed. I’m tired”. After turning off the lights, I wonder… is this my life now? Faint memories come back to me, as I gently close my eyes, finally falling asleep. I feel a slight burn in my stomach… but I try to ignore it as much as I can…

Suddenly, I am in a completely white room. I look down… but it feels like I’m floating, even though my feet are touching the ground. I try to reach the ceiling, but it seems so close, yet so far away… A booming voice resonates in the vast room. “This is not the real you... come back to your senses… do not leave them alone…”. “But I…” my voice dies down, I feel warm… “Is this it?” my fingers seem to be vanishing away... my vision gets blurry. “No, please! I don’t want to die!”. An overwhelming warmth encompasses me.

Ah yes… I start to remember now…

My name is… Hirayama Eiji, I am an average japanese male working a simple job. I currently reside in Fujisawa and I don’t own a driver’s license. I don’t drink alcohol, I don’t smoke, I try to be as healthy as I can be. I also aspire to have a quiet life, not being a burden to anyone.

???: “That’s all?”

Eiji: “Yes, officer, that should be all”

Officer: “Now, could you please tell me what happened here?”

A murder has happened here last night. A young male has been shot once in the stomach with a .45 caliber round. Heh, it seems the deed has been done by a professional. I was called over by the police officers because I live nearby and they thought I could provide information regarding the identification of the victim. I never met this man, even though… somehow he seems familiar in a way…

Officer: “Alright Hirayama-san, we are done here. You are free to go.”

Eiji: “Have a great day.”

I leave, without looking back. My palms are very sweaty. I always get nervous around the police officers, that’s just who I am. While opening my umbrella, a car drives over a big puddle, ruining my favourite beige checkered jacket and blue jeans. Hm? What’s this…? I don’t remember buying this… A strange small mirror was placed in my pocket somehow. Is this a joke? Or maybe a warning? With a slight glance at the mirror, I can see a silhouette behind me. Scared, I take a few looks behind me, but there wasn’t anyone. I take another glance at the mirror, but the silhouette is gone now. If I can remember correctly… the silhouette looked somewhat like a woman with long silky hair and her expressions seemed calm…

My house is a decent and plain one, nothing too extravagant. It’s just a calm place for me to eat, sleep and finish my overdue office work. There is enough room for two people, but I have been single for all of my 26 years. My mother died while I was at a young age, and my father abandoned me, leaving me to live with my uncle who was an alcoholic. Even so, I got by everything on my own. I can’t say that I live the best life now, but it sure is not the worst life. After leaving my clothes to dry, I take a seat on the couch and decide to turn on the television. As I expected, nothing new or interesting for me to watch, but I still watch the television because I have nothing better to do. It’s the same routine everyday: wake up, make breakfast, travel to work by train, walk home while listening to the occasional birds chirping and stealing glances at the nearby stands, greeting the people that I have been accustomed with, then at home make dinner and finally, sleep. At any rate, this is a mediocre life, but I have no complaints because this life is way better than my childhood.

“Oh, it’s 10:58, I should go to bed…” As I said that, a voice resonated in my head, “Come back to your senses…” What senses though? I must be tired… I tucked myself well under my blanket and fell asleep.

…

…

…time passes. It’s now a week after my interview with the police officer. Everyday since then has been ordinary. What’s with this mirror? I refused to look at it for a while now, but I think it’s time to take a more serious look. I get a weird feeling down my spine. Maybe I shouldn’t afterall…

I pulled it out of my jacket pocket and decided to look into it. At first, nothing happened, I made silly faces, I walked around with it… but nothing happened. To be honest, I was expecting to see that woman again. I let out a disappointed sigh, and put the small mirror back in my jacket’s pocket. Maybe it’s because my glasses are dirty? That would be ridiculous. I took my gray handkerchief from my glasses case and sat on my bed to wipe them. Sigh… let’s try again. Still, nothing happened. Annoyed I decided to go for a walk, maybe I could get more ideas.

As I step outside, my vision gets blurry for a while, but I don’t pay attention to this and move on. I am too focused on solving this mirror mystery. By chance, I walked by the place where that victim has been shot a week ago, since it’s close by. I had a feeling that I should check the mirror… After I took up some courage, I pulled the mirror out and looked hard at it…

“Huh… nothing? How could thi-” right as I said that, the woman has appeared behind me. It seemed as if she was trying to say something to me, but I couldn’t hear her. She placed her arms on my shoulders and laughed, then cried. All this time, I felt my back heavy. It was like someone was sitting on my back. Then, she stopped. My hand was shaking as I was looking directly at her blank face. She was emotionless now. I could see myself crying in the mirror, but I had no tears at all. My breathing gets heavy, I can hear my heart beating loudly in my chest. Her eyes darken, blood comes dripping out of her eyes and mouth. Her face is still blank. I start shaking more, but I have to keep on going. My reflection self cried until it’s eyes were red, but I wasn’t really crying.

???: “Y-you... how c-could you…” Were her words, but her mouth didn’t move. At long last, she disappeared again. I feel like I have slept for a while. What happened?

???: “Are you okay mister? You seem kind of pale. Here, have some water.”

Eiji: “Ah thank you very much.” I take a long sip of water. My throat felt dry, as if I was crying for a week.

Kiyomi: “I’m Seta Kiyomi, nice to meet you.”

Eiji: “Oh, my name is Hirayama Eiji.”

Kiyomi: “Woah.. you must be very thirsty what happened?”

I wanted to explain to her everything. She was beautiful, I felt like I could share all my secrets with her. That long black and beautiful hair, those lush lips, those cute green eyes, her long, slender legs and nice figure made me forget about all of my troubles. But I couldn’t speak a word about what I have seen. I am mortified.

Eiji: “You have been standing here for quite a while, is something wrong?”

True, my legs feel like I could fall at any given time. But I couldn’t fall yet. I have to keep looking at her…

Kiyomi: “Hey, can you hear me? Sheesh…”

Eiji: “Oh I’m very sorry, I have been thinking-”

Kiyomi: “Thinking about what? Now you’ve piqued my interest… Come on, tell me everything! Tell me why your eyes are so red as if you have been crying after you’ve lost your loved one, why your voice is so coarse as if you have been walking through the desert for a while without water, and why have you been standing here for almost three days.”

Eiji: “…three days…?”

Kiyomi: “Yes. Three days. What, you really don’t remember anything?”

Eiji: “It’s not like I don’t remember anything. It’s more like I don’t want to remember anything.”

Kiyomi: “Oh…”

Crap, I was thinking out loud. What should I do now? She's onto me. What do I tell her?

Kiyomi: “Sorry if I seem persistent, it’s just a habit of mine to squeeze information out of people. I’m a reporter at the local newspaper, you see.”

Eiji: “Don’t worry…”

Kiyomi: “But still, you seem to be a very interesting person. I want to talk with you more, if you mind. Let’s meet somewhere!”

Eiji: “Huh…”

Kiyomi: “How about the café? It’s very close by. I also live nearby, that’s how I saw you standing there. I kept looking through my bedroom window and I thought that you were some kind of stalker, but as days passed, you seemed to look like a sad, devastated person, who has seen someone die right before their eyes.”

Eiji: “Well… that’s something I guess…”

Kiyomi: “Oh the sun is setting, I have to go. Here is my contact information. Talk to you later!”

Eiji: “Goodbye.”

What an interesting woman she is. A bit too talkative for my liking, but that’s okay. I really can’t wait to see her again.

But man… have I been really standing for three whole days? When did time pass? What is this mirror? Should I throw it away? Who is that woman? Why did she cry blood? My legs sure hurt… I hope my boss doesn’t scold me for not coming to work for a few days. I guess I have to stay overtime now.

Seta Kiyomi huh… what an interesting woman. I’m looking forward to seeing her again. What did I want to do? Oh yeah, going home. My thoughts are all over the place.

Back home, the atmosphere is the same welcoming one. I hurry on over to sit on my lovely comfy couch as I look at the clock, indicating that it’s 9:14. What more do I want? I guess at my age I should have a wife that welcomes me everytime I come home and makes food for me, loving every last bit of me… Oh well, I guess I have to keep on waiting for the right woman to come into my life. I’m too afraid to make the first step. I don’t want to ruin friendships and be alone again. As of now, I have a few male friends, who I’ve met at a park. I was sitting on a bench, hiding from the scorching hot summer sun eating an ice-cream, while a gang of guys walked by…

???: “Hey watch it!”

???: “Calm down, Masashi, he didn’t do anything wrong.”

Masashi: “He did! He got in my way!” but I was sitting on a bench

???: “Jeez, relax. Your energy is not a pleasant one, you know?”

Masashi: “Quiet Tadao! Keep nerding over your books in your little corner and leave me be.”

Tadao: “Right.”

Masashi: “Hey! Move it, or you’re gonna regret it.” Araki Masashi’s ego is so over the top, that every last inconvenience annoys him.

Eiji: “O-okay, s-sorry.” I said, with a sweaty brow, and got up.

Masashi: “Ah… what a great day… I could sit here all day long. You there! What’s your name? Tell me quickly.”

Eiji: “Y-ye-yes, um…”

Masashi: “I said… hurry it up!”

Eiji: “My name is Hirayama Eiji!”, I said, with a cracked over the top voice.

Masashi: “Bft.. hahahah what is with this guy? Am I really that menacing?”

Eiji: “Well…” my face starts trembling… I’m on the verge of crying.

Masashi: “Are you going to finish your ice-cream? It’s going to melt, you know? Yasushi! Hand him a handkerchief.”

Yasushi: “You got it.” Ishida Yasushi is a calm and composed man. He hands me a simple handkerchief. Apparently, he has a whole collection of them, so he doesn’t mind giving one away.

Eiji: ”Th-thank you.” I’m still trembling. My sensible part is really showing off now.

Masashi: “You are so welcome! Here, sit by me. Tell me about yourself.”

I talk with the guys about my and their past, laughing about different stuff. Meanwhile, Minamoto Tadao buys ice-cream for everyone. Araki-san got the basic vanilla flavoured one, Ishida-san got the exuberant strawberry and banana flavoured one, Minamoto-san was quite full, so he didn’t buy any for him, but I, on the other hand, was still somewhat scared of Araki-san and was struggling to finish my ice-cream.

Masashi: “Wow… you’re actually really ordinary huh…”

Eiji: “So it would seem” I didn’t tell them about my childhood. Instead, I said that I had an usual growth without any problems whatsoever.

Tadao: “Your approach to life is quite honest and calm. I like it. Say, do you read any books?”

Eiji: “I used to, but with my actual job I feel like I don’t have time for anything…”

Yasushi: “Eh? What do you work for?”

Eiji: “I’m an office worker.”

Masashi: “…”

Yasushi: “…”

Tadao: “Splendid!”

At least it seems like Minamoto-san isn’t that annoyed by my presence. Time passes as we finish our ice-creams. The hot summer sun is up high. We are on the verge of melting. God I hate summer sun… I just wish it could rain forever…

Araki-san violently slaps his face. Everyone in the vicinity, except Minamoto-san and Ishida-san, looks at him weirdly. He makes a very unusual expression, then looks off in the distance as if nothing happened. I wonder what's going on in his head.

Masashi: “Mosquito.”

Eiji: “Phew…” why did I seem so relieved? I barely met this man, yet I am somehow glad that nothing happened to him.

Masashi: “What. Are you, by chance, afraid of losing me, Hiarayama?”

Eiji: “Um no.. I mean yes! Wait…” they all laughed at me. Have I been played? Does he love me? Wait a minute, why am I thinking about this? Obviously he looks like a guy that would have a girlfriend. His spiky blonde hair along with blue-ish ocean eyes really give off a delinquent vibe that would have a lover. Not to mention the ridiculously long chain that he keeps adjusting every so often at his waist. His lumberjack-style outfit is quite fitting for his type.

Tadao: “Be at peace, brother, he was only joking…” brother? Is he serious? I don’t have any siblings as far as I know… this must be his way of speaking, which is really calming. I feel like I could sit with him at a table and talk about philosophers, even though I know nothing about them, I feel like I could learn so many things from Minamoto-san. His glasses are red combined with black, quite stylish, I like them. His black fluffy hair and brown eyes are a very nice combo. I would wear his outfit every day of the week. If I met him randomly on the street I would think that he is an office colleague of mine.

Masashi: “Are you alright Yasushi? You seem very quiet for some reason, I don’t like it.”

Yasushi: “Yeah…” It’s true, I barely heard him talk. He seems to be very calm and conserved for himself. I don’t mean to be rude, but he looks like the most average person you could ever meet. White t-shirt, blue jeans, no accessories, messy hair, you name it. I’m a bit curious about his handkerchief collection though… I have to ask him later about it.

Masushi: “Good lord look at the time, I have to meet someone in about 5 minutes!”

Tadao: “We’ll be taking farewell for now. Let us exchange contact information with Hirayama-san, so that we can talk later and plan other meetings. If… that’s okay with you.”

Eiji: “Y-yeah sure why not. I would like to talk with you all more.”

Masashi: “Why the hell not. Here you go. See ya later!”

As I wave goodbye to everyone, my memory fades, I am back on my couch. My eyes are heavy. Tomorrow is Friday, another day at the office. I sure hope that the boss will cut me some slack. I still haven’t thought about any excuse to tell him. To be honest, I am quite afraid of what tomorrow brings. It’s 9:47… have I really been thinking about the past for this long…? Ah, my throat is so dry right now. I own roughly around 40 cups, in varying sizes, which is a bit concerning because I live on my own. I like having more cups where I can drink water, even though I wash and put them back in their place right after I drink from them. That was a good cup of water...

While leaving my kitchen, the hallway light flickers… I have the impression that someone is standing right at the door of my bedroom, waiting for me. I freeze, my legs start shaking, a chill goes down my spine. That black figure seems to be way too tall for my house… He is bending forward because of his height. His vision snaps right at me, I can’t move. Suddenly, his long arm is reaching for me. My vision gets foggy… and I fall down. A sudden boom can be heard from outside, dogs are barking, and the weird figure disappears. Well three days without sleep… I try to shrug this encounter off, but it still is quite eerie.

My bed feels so soft… When my head made contact with my pillow, I instantly fell asleep.