Chapter 30:

Defining Your Path Forward

Reshape in Another World

‘Can you really endure months, or years, or centuries without him?’

“…”

‘I don’t want you to be sad when the day comes when he’ll pass away!’

“Ahh!” I violently scratch my head.

What am I supposed to do?

I know I can get through it. If Yuuma is there with me, I’m sure I can do everything I can to overcome this.

But… What would happen after that?

What’s the best possible outcome for both of us?

Is it better if we continue this relationship, or is it better for the both of us if we decide to—

“No, no!”

Anything but that!

“What is wrong with me…?” I cover my face.

I can’t believe I even considered it… But being realistic, can I really handle living for decades, or even centuries without Yuuma?

“…” I lay further on my pillow, my eyes stuck onto the ceiling.

Hey Yuuma, what do you think I should do?

The thought of breaking up is enough to upset me, but I also know that I wouldn’t be able to handle living without you.

If we stop this relationship, we can spare each other from long-term pain, but I also don’t want us to end it. However, if we continue, I can’t say that I can handle a future without you.

“…Can I even ask Yuuma for this?”

“—you say to him?”

“…?”

Who’s voice is that?

I slowly leave my room and head towards the source of the noise, which is designated in the living room.

I peek into the room to notice my mom talking to someone who has a tan-skin with her hair down.

“Aunt Vena?”

“…?”

“…!”

Did she notice me?

“Hm? What’s wrong Vena?” Mom asks.

“Oh, nothing. Thought I saw something for a second,” Aunt Vena laughed.

Thank god…

“Anyway, back to topic~” Aunt Vena clapped her hands, “You shouldn’t say that to him, you know…”

“I know, but—”

“Clairene,” Aunt Vena pressed her voice, “I thought you already learned your lesson…”

“I know that!” Mom yelled out, “But… After seeing you, I just—”

“Clairene.” Aunt Vena cuts Mom off, “You know, I loved my husband.”

“…!”

“I’m really happy that you’re concerned about me, but I’m okay now…” Aunt Vena softens her tone.

“B-But… When you visited us a few days ago, you were…” Mom’s voice trails off.

“…Ohh… That…” Aunt Vena replied.

“If you are happy, then why were you—”

“Is it wrong to feel sad every once in a while?”

“…”

“…Hey, Clairene…” Aunt Vena’s voice softens, “You do know that life has its ups and downs, right?”

“…”

“Even though it’s been ninety years since he left me, even though it can be painful at times, it still doesn’t change the fact that I treasure him…”

Ninety years…

“There’s nothing I can do about it, you know…” Aunt Vena adds. She continues, “We elves are slow to begin with, so there’s nothing we can do about our life span…”

“I know right?”

“And there’s also nothing I could do to prevent myself from getting close to the person that I love…” Aunt Vena said.

“…”

“But… For me, having a limited amount of time to be with someone that I love is somehow more fulfilling…”

“…”

“…What do you mean?” Mom asked.

“How should I say it…” Aunt Vena mulls, “Despite being able to live a long life, it always felt like a chore to me…”

“…”

“It’s as if I’m only living because I can…” Aunt Vena trails off. She then continues, “But… after I met him, it felt more… memorable…”

“…”

“Even though we were only together for forty years, those forty years felt… bright to me…” Aunt Vena’s voice softens.

“…”

“Well, I’m not good with words, so it’s hard to explain. Tehe~” Ms. Vena teasingly replied.

“Vena…”

“…”

More memorable…

“Don’t you agree, Celice?”

“Hm?”

“…!”

Did she know this entire time?!

Considering how much of an airhead she is, I thought she didn’t even realize she saw me for a second!

Sounds of footsteps quickly approach my direction, until Aunt Vena stands tall before me, as if she’s a giant.

“Come Celice!” Aunt Vena aggressively grabbed my left arm.

“NOOO!”

…

…..

…….

“I’m really sorry Celice!” Aunt Vena bows her head down.

“I thought my heart was going to jump out of me!” I replied as I slowly caught my breath.

Right now, we’re sitting on the couch with the only thing lighting the place is a single lantern that’s placed on the table.

“You shouldn’t be eavesdropping in the first place…” Mom adds.

“Geh…”

“It’s fine, it’s fine~” Aunt Vena waves her hand towards Mom, “Well, it’s a good thing anyway, since there’s something I wanted to ask.”

“Ask?” I tilt my head.

“Also Claire, not butting in!” Aunt Vena flicked on Mom’s forehead.

“Ow! I didn’t say anything!” Mom holds her forehead while sulking.

“Just needed to make sure.” Aunt Vena pokes her tongue out.

“…”

“Anyway…” Aunt Vena’s face became serious as she looked into me, “Celice, the only person that can define your feelings is only you…”

“…”

“What your mother may be imposing, but her concerns are justified. That’s why you need to find a balance.” Aunt Vena brings up her index finger.

“Balance?”

“That’s right,” Aunt Vena has two of her index fingers raised. She brings up her right hand slightly and continues, “On one hand, you have to consider a bit about the future that you’re going to tackle, but on the other, you also have to consider what you want as well.” Aunt Vena brought her left hand.

“…”

“And after all of that,” Aunt Vena brought her hands together and combined them, “You have to choose one path and be prepared to deal with the consequences going forward.”

“…”

“Or, you can just go with your gut feeling.” Aunt Vena spread her hands, “Like me!”

“…!” Mom smacked Aunt Vena’s head from the back.

“Ow!”

“And here I thought you were giving decent advice to my daughter…” Mom crosses her arms.

“B-But I really mean it…” Aunt Vena rubbed her head with teary eyes. She continues, “Thinking that much into the future is important, but not that necessary.” Aunt Vena grins.

“…”

Then what was the point of you saying all of that in the first place?

“Well, to put things simply; just do the things that feel right for you and not worry about the future that much!” Aunt Vena brought her thumbs up. She continues, “It’s better to focus on the present and what comes tomorrow rather than stressing over what will happen far into the future…”

“…”

“It’s okay to be worried, but don’t let that stop you from moving forward…” Aunt Vena gave a softened smile.

“…”

What feels right for me…

I already know what it is that I want.

Genuinely speaking, I don’t want to think of the future, but it’s really hard to turn a blind eye to it.

But,

“…Mom.”

If it’s okay to put the future aside…

“I know what I want…”

As long as I don’t stop thinking about it.

“Despite everything both of you have said…”