SHUT UP!!!!!

The four student who didn’t pass the previous exams were told to stay a bit after school hours to receive their redone exam results.

Each of the names of the students were called one by one and they were told out loud in front of the others if they passed or not.

“Sakaguchi, Mia. Pass.” She went to the teacher to receive her grades and was allowed to directly leave the class. Same thing happened for the other students as well.

“Takaguchi, Nana. Pass. Barely.”

“Okimura, Minami. Pass.”

“Ruu, Hino.”

Her name was finally called. Although after the results she would be finally free, there was no excitement.

Her heart beat as loud as the teacher calling out the students' names. Hino was nervous.

She couldn’t fail. She shouldn’t fail. After all, she has studied intensively for more than a month. Maybe even harder than other students. That's what it felt like for her at least.

She don’t want to fail. She don’t want to study even more and repeat the same thing again. She has lost her own free time. And she don’t want to lose even more.

After those sacrifices, she thought to herself, there’s no way she could fail.

“Ruu-san."

"You didn’t pass.”

...

“Ruu-san, I’m sorry to say but you didn’t pass the exam.”

H-Hino didn’t pass?

...

no.

No.

No!

NO!

HOW!

How...

Hino already studied and everything.

No way…

D-Does that mean Hino w-will-

“Ruu-san, please bring your parents to school tomorrow.”

No... PLEASE! NO!

Sensei please no...

Hino don’t want…

“The teachers need to have a conversation with your mom regarding your school performance. We can either meet early in the morning before class begins or after school. Please pass this information on to your parents. Here are your results. That will be all.”

The number largely written on her paper was a 37. Indeed she didn’t pass.

No way…

Please…

No...

She arrived at the front door of their house, hesitating to open the door. She doesn’t know if her mom is already there or not but she didn’t really want to find out.

Eventually she opened the door and still afraid of her mom, she trembled with her words,
"I-I'm... h-home..."

"AH! HINO YOU'RE BACK!" She shuddered from her mom's voice which come from the kitchen.

As she was taking off her shoes, she could hear her mom's foot prints coming over to her. The steps were gradually getting louder. And in the same way, her heartbeat was beating stronger with each step.

By the time Hino finished taking off her shoes, she looked up and her mom was looming over her. And with her was her expectations.

"So, how did it go? Did you pass this time?"

Her mom's words felt heavy in her ear. She didn't know what to say to her. To be exact, she knew the answer but she didn't want to say it. The only thing she voiced was a stutter of words.

"Hino, what's wrong? How did it go?! Did you pass or not?!

"H-H-Hi...," She continued to stutter. "H-Hino didn't pass..."

And everything was still.

Her mom didn't immediately answer her. She was trying to process what her daughter had told her. She wasn't sure what to say herself.

Hino waited for her mom's answer. For a few second, which felt like whole minutes, there was a loud silence.

"Hino, you... you didn't pass?"

Another pause after her mom asked her the question.

"You didn't..."

And abruptly her mom forcibly pulled the cables of her earphones, powerfully plugging them out of her ears and slightly tugging her head in the process. Her phone also dragged by the cable dropped out of her hand and fell on the floor.

Hino shouted from the pain of the tug on her ears, "OW! MA!"

"Ma! My earphones ple-"

"HINO!" Her mom instantly immobilized her.

"F****** LISTEN HERE."

Ow, It's so loud.

Hino doesn't have anything more to hush the voices around her. Her mom's voice enters her ear deeper than before. It became louder than her own thoughts, obstructing her thoughts, making her unable to think clearly. And without a clear thought it became hard for her to calm herself down and maintain her senses.

"YOUR DAD AND I WORK HARD EVERY DAY TO PAY FOR YOUR SCHOOL AND YOUR LESSONS. YOUR DAD EVEN ARRIVE HOME LATE EVERY DAY. AND WHAT DID YOU DO IN RETURN? YOU FAILED. I BET YOU DIDN'T CONCENTRATE, BECAUSE YOU WERE FOCUSING ON LISTENING TO YOUR MUSIC, RIGHT?!"

Hino didn't concentrate because Hino listened to music?! That doesn't even make sense...!

"HINOKAWA-SENSEI ALSO ALLOWED YOU TO LISTEN TO MUSIC DURING YOUR LESSONS BECAUSE SHE THOUGHT IT WOULD HELP YOU FOCUS. BUT I BET YOU WERE'NT EVEN PAYING ATTENTION!"

"IT DID HELP HINO FOCUS!!!" She screamed in her heart, unable to let them out. With it her heart raced even faster.

"Are you listening to yourself, ma? YOU'RE not making any sense. You don't understand ANYTHING!!!"

"OH AND LET'S NOT FORGET YOUR BOOKS. OH WAIT, THERE WAS ALSO THAT BOY WASN'T THERE?! WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO GROW UP AND REALIZE THAT THOSE STUFF ARE NOT IMPORTANT!"

Hino couldn't take it anymore. She dashed through her mom, shoving her aside and going straight to her room.

"HINO! HEY HINO! WHERE ARE YOU GOING?"

Shut up.

"GREAT! WHAT A GRATEFUL CHILD YOU ARE! NOW YOU'RE RUNNING FROM YOUR MOM!"

Shut up!

SHUT UP MA! YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND ANYTHING! YOU NEVER DID! YOU'RE LOUD. YOU'RE NOISY. YOU'RE ANNOYING. SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP!!!

Hino made it to her room and shut the door. She sat there on the floor hugging herself.

"Shut up, ma... y-you d-don't know a-anything." Her voice started to waver as she began tearing up.

"It's so loud..." She whispered to her self. "It's so loud.."

Even after closing the door and sitting there in the silence, she could hear her mom's voice in hear head. Her mom kept on berating her with her words.

"Shut up..."

Hino tried to cover her ears with her hands, but the words won't stop coming. Even after a while her mom's word lingered with her.

Usually she could overwhelm the noises with music, but couldn't anymore.

"Please stop..."

"Shut up..."

Shut up...