But don't finish prematurely what you haven't started yet!

The train left the station as I left my past life behind with it.

Now, I only needed several hours to reach my destination and something to pass the time along the way. I believe my best choice would be to sleep until then, or I can just enjoy the view from outside the window.

It didn't take long for me to doze off somewhere along my journey. However, when I opened my eyes again, I realized that I was only halfway there, still some distance away from reaching the end of the line and the last station the train would arrive at.

Yes, as you've probably gathered, the village I was heading to was at the end of the line. Talk about a remote destination. It wasn't long before I learned that the train commute was happening only once a month, going back and forth, and that no other trains were traveling there, as there was no alternative line.

Then, a realization hit me in the face. If I went there, I couldn't leave the place for a whole month.
I started havivg second thoughts. Maybe I could get off at another station. I still had a chance to do so.

In the end, I decided against it. My aunt and cousin were already waiting for me at the train station, I presumed, ready to give me a lift and guide me to their house. After so many years had passed since my last visit, I probably wouldn't remember how to reach their place on my own.

Hold that thought.
We are going through a tunnel.
Why is that worth mentioning, you ask?

Well, since you've chosen to disregard my warnings and the suggested ways to dispose of the book, or even decided to give it a chance by reading a couple of chapters in case it might get interesting later on before you abandon it altogether, then you're in for the whole experience. It's like signing a waiver. You're going to feel and hear every bit of my nagging and despair, down to every tormenting little detail, until the very end.

Probably your end, because mine isn’t close at all. Author-sensei-san has great hopes for this one, enough to turn it into not just a single book but an entire series.

Good luck with that. And good luck to you as you read it right now.

You can still throw it out the window, though that could be a little hard since this book started as a digital version and that would require throwing the whole computer out.
You can close the tab or page or look for another book. I'm pretty sure there are many more interesting ones here where you're reading this one. There are even some that have received awards, but the only award this one will receive is for causing stress and anxiety levels to rise, reaching new heights for the first time ever.

Probably a new record?

I'll give you a minute to rethink it.
…
…

No?
Still here?

They were right about you Reader-san... You really are a masochist...

I tried my best... Don’t hold me accountable for it later on...
It’s on you now...

Past beyond the tunnel and after a couple of hours and several stops at stations on the way to 'Nowhere Ville', the compartment I was in became suffocatingly empty. I was the only passenger remaining, and I still had five to six hours until the end of the line.

This is sad... No one was going to where I was going, even if you took into consideration the fact that there was only one train going there once a month.

Where am I heading to? And why?
Did my parents not actually want me, as Author-sensei-san mentioned earlier? Is that true?
Can I get a spoiler or even a hint?

Author-sensei-san?!
Did you fall asleep?!
Is this book so boring even for you to keep up with it?!
…
Are you giving me the silent treatment?!
Or are you just...

Nah, it can’t be. Given the fact that I'm still talking means that they are probably not dead. Physically, at least...

Out of nowhere, the train started shaking violently, and since there weren’t any safety belts to be found anywhere close by, my body started bouncing like a pinball on the seats, left and right. Becoming dizzy from all these exchanges, I started vomiting everywhere, and the fear of the train derailing made me pee myself just a little bit.

…

I don’t know which is worse. The fact that Author-sensei-san is making all these things happen in the story or that I am still narrating them as they do...

Nice try breaking the 4th wall there, but try again.

Because I didn’t actually puke, that was just my bento spilling all over the place after it flew out of my hands while you were trying to be witty. And the pee that you mentioned was the oolong tea I was trying to drink before you started shaking the train, the same way you shake your piggy bank every so often when you are looking for change to go and buy candy from the closest convenience store.

Also, do you think it’s a wise choice to mention things like pee and vomit in a novel targeted for all audiences? While I am aware that there will be ‘no audiences’ for this novel at all to begin with, but still. At least try to come up with something a little bit more unique or smart for a change of pace.
Of course, you can always let me take the lead so I can bring you at least one reader, who probably got lost searching for something good to read and ended up here by mistake.

You are lucky there’s no dislike button here because that would have been a new world record for you, yet again.

That was scary and also kind of confusing. Did I manage to change the situation according to my whims, or maybe Author-sensei-san decided to spare my feelings a bit and gave me a different outcome?

No answer...

So, let’s move on...

With everything that went by earlier, my traveling destination was getting closer and closer by the minute, and soon I would have been able to get off the train and touch stable ground again. This whole trip had become tiresome and taxing for my fragile, non-athletic body, and meddlesome Author-sensei-san is keeping me busy, not letting me keep up with the story.

Two hours later, after a lot of back and forth inside the empty compartment, I saw a village in the distance from the side window. It seemed bigger than I imagined, and that was when the anxiety finally started catching up to me.

I will be there for a whole year. I cannot even begin to comprehend the notion. I know that I wished for a new start, but that was supposed to be limited to one thing, like changing schools. Changing my whole life or the way of it was just too much to calculate and accept.

I needed some time to take it all in. I hope my aunt and cousin will help me ease this transition. But then again, who am I kidding? It has been years since the last time I visited them, so I'm probably as good as any stranger that crosses your path on a Sunday morning stroll.

I guess I'm on my own on this one as well. Not that I was expecting any kind of help or even acceptance from anyone until now in my life. I accepted the fact that I'm going to die alone, same as author-sensei-san, abandoned by everyone and everything, ever after, till the end of times, and forever and ever until...

Author-sensei-san...
You are scaring me right now...
Are you still there, or did you go to continue writing another novel...?
Have you given up already...? Right at the very beginning...?
...

I guess I can continue the story on my own, for now. Let me take the lead for a bit, as the real protagonist of the story this time.
Nameless protagonist...
Without any special powers or even special talents protagonist...

Maybe... Just maybe...
Now that author-sensei-san is away, I can probably change the course of the story and lead it based on my wishes and my own dreams...
Can it be? Is it even possible?
I won’t know unless I try... So here we go...
I’ll be author-sensei-san for a bit.

As the train was slowly approaching its destination towards that godforsaken village, the train driver decided to change course and abandon that route altogether. No one was going there, and no one was leaving either, so what was the point for a line even to exist for that place anyway?

Alright, alright...
I know what you are thinking right about now.
‘It’s a train. How can it suddenly change course out of nowhere unless there’s a cross-section somewhere across the line?’
I know already, but please, bear with me for a little bit, okay?
Have you read the tags of this novel? One of them states that it has supernatural content, so I'm keeping the promise to reader-san.

As the train's speed started to increase, the train began hovering. Just for a little bit at the beginning, and then it soared like a bird high into the sky.

You see now, reader-san? It started to make sense, right?

Of course it did.

The ground and even the whole world below looked like a tiny grain of sand, and all the planets and the nebulae became as minuscule as the imagination of author-sensei-san, who should have let me write the book instead so I can make it more interesting and more appealing to all the reader-san out there.

Reader-san, I know... like I said, it has a supernatural twist about it...
I think I have explained as much... you don’t have to interrupt me every minute... This is really annoying, you know?

I think I understand how author-sensei-san feels now and why reacting like this every time I'm interfering with the narrative.

The train continued ascending into the heavens, passing new planets and galaxies unknown. It went on and on until the glow of the stars started fading into the distance, and the darkness of the universe started devouring any source of light that had been left behind. And it finally reached...
Reached nothing...
Nothing but darkness...
A place many human lifetimes away...
Far from sadness...
Far from pain and suffering...
Far from author-sensei-san...
And there, the nameless protagonist lived happily ever after...

The End...
Yet again...

You know, maybe if I try that a couple of times, it might actually work.

Stop writing this novel! It's a waste of paper and pencils!
And you are a waste of space, oxygen and resources, but anyway...

Oh, right... I forgot...
Digital version!

Stop writing this novel! It's a waste of electricity and...!
Ehm... Yeah, just that apparently...

But anyway...

Author-sensei-san, don't you think it's time to take the lead again and finish this chapter with me finally reaching my destination? Otherwise, it might keep dragging on and on, and you might even lose the two readers who accidentally clicked on the novel because the site didn't load properly last time.

I promise I will stop talking down on you, at least for this chapter, and I will be a nice nameless NPC...
I mean the protagonist for your grocery list...
I mean your novel.

I really am a sad and pathetic being...
I am talking to my imaginary... enemy...

Alright...

I'll continue the story in your place until you finally decide to stop crying about how unpopular your novel is...
I mean... I already knew that, so why did it come as a shock to you, I wonder...

I can also employ more sophisticated vocabulary compared to you, courtesy of the thesaur... I mean, my boundless imagination...
Ahem...

Anyway, let's move on before the couple of reader-san who are reading right now get boreded.... bordered... boderer...
More bored!

Yeesh... I took my eyes away from thesaurus for one second and suddenly I forgot how to talk...

As I gazed out of the window, coming to terms with the fact that I was nearing my ultimate destination, both literally and metaphorically, the conductor announced the train's final stop. They made it clear that the train would only be staying for five minutes, so everyone—practically just me—had to exit the train immediately. Even the driver seemed eager to depart from this godforsaken place as fast as possible, making me feel more hesitant to get off.

Perhaps I should just remain on the train and return to where I came from. That's another possible course of action, and since Author-sensei-san isn't here anymore, I can literally do anything I want. However, the knowledge that my aunt and cousin are likely waiting for me, albeit with some doubt regarding their actual presence at the station, compels me to proceed with this rendezvous.

Thank you, thesaurus, but I won’t need you anymore, probably...

The train came to a halt, and the side doors of the compartment slid open. With the sack on my shoulder, I approached the sliding door, glanced outside for a moment, and attempted to convince myself to take one more step onto the platform.
My hesitation didn't last long, as the sliding door began to close again, as if the conductor were saying, "Alright, get out, we want to depart from this place as quickly as possible."

Please, take me with you...

The moment my feet touched the ground, the train's bell began ringing, signaling that it was ready to depart once more. They weren't joking about their urgency.
I waved at the departing train, hoping that I would return sooner rather than later, then turned around to face the station and search for my welcoming party.

To my disappointment, and as I had anticipated, there was nobody there waiting for me...

Maybe they are running late and got the schedule wrong, although I doubted it. I suspected they might not have wanted to bother coming all the way here, given that the station was on the outskirts of the town. Unfortunately, I didn't know the exact location or the address of the house to hire a cab or take a bus to get there. All I had was the name, which I wasn't sure if anyone would recognize or could provide specific directions.

But why was I stressing about it? It was a village, after all. How many houses could it possibly have? Maybe 10-15 houses at most? I could start knocking on random doors, and eventually, I should find it. Hopefully.

So, I made up my mind to begin the search instead of lingering here, lamenting my situation and the fate that Author-sensei-san had happily bestowed upon me. I wanted to get this over with as soon as possible.

I won't bore you with the details of how I eventually found the place or even how long it took me to get there. Although I did mention earlier that you'll get the whole package of the story, I'll make an exception this time, Reader-san. Consider yourself lucky, as this is likely the first and last time it happens. Enjoy it while you can.

As I stood before my aunt's front door, it occurred to me that I should expand my vocabulary a bit. I had used the phrase 'upon reaching' so many times by now that everyone might assume it's as poor as Author-sensei-san who believes the legend that people can become rich by merely writing books...

Reader-san, I'm aware that this is indeed a fact and it's actually true, but let's keep that between us. If they find out, they might continue writing this novel or even more of them, hoping to become one of them...

You know what? It's a ‘he’. He is a ‘he’. Author-sensei-san is a ‘he’. If it were a 'she,' I'm fairly certain I'd have better luck than being the nameless protagonist of a book that's essentially, well, nothing. There's nothing good about it, nothing worth mentioning, and certainly nothing worth reading. And if you're reading it right now, please stop and go do something more interesting. You know what's more interesting than reading this book? Everything. Even watching paint dry on a wall would be more engaging. Even being bored and having nothing to do would be more entertaining than this. So do yourself a favor and stop punishing yourself for the sins of your ancestors and do something that genuinely has meaning and value.

If that doesn't wake him up, I don't know what will, anymore. What a codependent relationship we have... If he stops writing, I'll simply vanish from existence. But if he continues writing, my misery and torment will go on and on and on... And I'm not actually sure which of the two is worse...

I knocked on the door a couple of times, but all I received in return was absolute silence. You know what would be amusing? If my aunt was actually at the station, waiting for me there, while I stood outside her house, hoping that someone would answer the door and give me a warm welcome. But who am I kidding? No one was going to give me a warm welcome anyway. Just the typical routine: "Hello, how are you? Long time no see," followed by instructions like, "Your room is on the second floor, second door to the right. You're responsible for cleaning it, and meals are at specific hours of the day."

Before I decided to give up and simply sit on the doorstep and wait, I made one last attempt by knocking and shouting her name in case she didn't hear the door.

“Aunt Keiko, it’s me, I’m here. Aunt Keiko, I'm right outside the door. Can you hear me, Aunt...”

Before I could even finish my sentence, the door swung open wide, and the last thing I saw was an object hurtling toward my face at supersonic speed. Then, everything went dark, as I found myself falling backward onto the floor.

Ah... it appears Author-sensei-san is finally back, and he's discovering new ways to punish me for his ineptitude...

But right now, I'm feeling quite sleepy... so I'll take a rest... or perhaps it will be eternal, as I'm not sure if I'm dead or simply unconscious...

If it's the former, then it means my suffering and the reader's-san's too have come to a close, and the birth of another nameless protagonist awaits in the pages of another story... Whether that's a good or bad thing, I'll leave it to your judgment and the judgment of all those who... will never read it anyway...

I'll just go to sleep now... Please don't wake me up...

Goodbye and...

The End (for the third time now)…