Chapter 9:

Yowie Hunt ep 3: That's not a knife

The Shiruka Collection


As Dumbee dragged me past the tree, I noticed the frog's shot gun lying on the ground. I instantly grabbed it.

"That's not a knife mate. Won't do ya any good out here," Dumbee stated.

As I examined the gun, I sadly had to concede Dumbee had a point. It looked like it was out of ammo, meaning it was just a giant club. A knife probably would be better for self defense.

"Alright, I'll give you some help. Since you don't have a pouch, here's an item box," Richelieu's voice rang out.

A screen labeled, "item box" appeared before me.

"I'll also enchant the gun. Now you have unlimited ammo. And that's all I have for you. Bye Bitch!"

I quickly tested out my new weapon. It wasn't bad, but I had trouble aiming since I was a kangaroo.

Dumbee and I ventured until nightfall hit.

"So do we camp?" I asked.

"Kangaroos don't camp mate. That's what humans like me do," Dumbee stated.

*Roux lost 2 brain cells*

"I used to be a human you know," I stated.

"Nah, you're a kangaroo mate."

"Ever hear of reincarnation?"

"That a flower mate?"

"NO! I mean you die and get reborn as something else."

"But no one dies out here mate."

"Um, the frog got eaten, and there were skeletons."

"That counts as dying? Never knew mate. So why didn't they get reincarnated?"

"I DON'T KNOW!"

We ended up going back and forth on the topic until morning.

When we finally moved on, I was sleep deprived. I also lost a total of 24 brain cells over the course of our conversation.

As we traveled, we suddenly were surrounded by men wielding scimitars.

"Nomads mate! They got some of the nastiest knives around," Dumbee warned as the nomads surrounded us.

"Shit, they're too close to shoot. Got a knife Dumbee?" I asked.

"Yeah, I got a knife," he smiled as he pulled out a very large hunting knife that was so big, it looked more like a sword.

He then spun around and sliced all the nomads, as well as me.

*Roux lost 69 brain cells in order to revive*

"THE HELL! I JUST DIED YOU IDIOT!" I shouted.

"But you reincarnated mate."

"This is more like respawn- Oh forget it!"

*Roux lost 1 brain cell*

We traveled some more and encountered more nomads. This time, I ducked to the ground as Dumbee spun round and round. However, he tripped over me before he killed all the nomads and we both got stabbed to death. It hurt like hell.

Luckily, we respawned a little distance away from the nomads.

*Roux lost 70 brain cells to revive himself and Dumbee*

Dumbee then charged at them, while I stayed and watched from afar. He somehow managed to beat them with his stupidity. We then proceeded onward until we found a small town surrounded by sand.

"The hell is this? A mirage?" I asked.

"My rage? I ain't angry mate," Dumbee smiled.

"NO an illusion, like it doesn't really exist, but it looks like it does."

"What's that mate?"

I facepalmed and lost 2 brain cells.

Sure enough, as we got closer, the image faded.

"Yep, it was a mirage," I stated.

"Nah mate, this is just normal ground," Dumbee stated.

*Roux lost 1 brain cell*

Suddenly, Dumbee went on guard.

"Oh Shit, mate! He's here! The nomad king!" Dumbee shouted.

I turned to see some nomads carrying a large fat nomad sitting on a throne. The large man leapt into the air and gracefully flipped around before landing perfectly with his sword drawn.

If I wasn't in such a bad mood, I'd have been impressed at his world class acrobatics.

"I am the king of nomads! You and your pet will die Mr. Zoologist," the nomad king declared as he twirled his scimitar around.

Dumbee pulled out his knife and prepared for battle.

*BANG*

I had whipped out my shot gun and killed the nomad king instantly.

The nomads ran off in fear as Dumbee put his knife away.

"Why'd ya do that mate?" Dumbee asked.

"Cause I'm tired of this shit," I growled as I hopped over to the nomad king's corpse.

After confirming he was dead, I looted him of his scimitar and valuables. Perhaps they might come in handy later.

After that, we continued on our journey.

"He have any Vegemite on him? I'm getting hungry mate," Dumbee stated.

"NO!" I grumbled.

                                                                       ...

The editor groaned as he viewed the set.

"What are you thinking? Why are you listening to that man?" the editor asked the director.

"Sorry Mr. Producer, but it's just best to let Shiruka sensei do most of the directing. He's into it, and when this shit flops, I'll be able to say he did most of the directing and save my reputation," the director retorted.

"The hell did I even hire you for!?"

"Even if I polish shit, it's still shit!"

"Damn you Shiragiku!" the editor grumbled.

Mario Nakano 64
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