Determination of Destruction

Back at the destroyed living room.

This is troublesome… To think that there would be this many beasts attacking.

Judging from that attack they launched at us earlier, it would be good to assume that this killer already knows that I am after him.

I knew he had multiple beasts with him but this is just too much. Did he expand their numbers?

I don’t know but that beastman from earlier Samael, he’s probably the strongest pawn he has. If he decided to attack us now, then…

“System Access: Materialize Item #98 from Spatial Storage #1” I voiced a command to the device within me.

A moment later a crystal spear had materialized in my right hand.

Sealing an entire area of this size will be difficult but it’s not possible. I also have to disable every single electronic device in the area to prevent this attack from getting on the internet.

Too troublesome. “Now then, if I’m going to be setting up a seal then that park just below should do just fine.” I quietly muttered as I jumped down from the building and ran towards the park.

A minute later I arrive at the park and see a single beast running towards me…

I thought Eden already killed the ones here in this street, but it probably ran away. I thought as I readied my spear.

As soon as the wolf-like beast got in my range, I struck it with my spear and plunged it into its skull. That reminds me… those nanomachines I transferred to her earlier, it must’ve already expired.

I didn’t mean to transfer them in the morning, but she said she just wanted to save up her energy for tonight so I forcefully transferred them to him to knock her out.

I’m an idiot, I should’ve probably transferred more before I had her go on his own. I’ll finish up here quickly then quickly head to where she is. I thought as I ran towards the middle of the park.

“Good, it’s empty.” I said as I quickly stabbed the spear into the ground.

“System Access: Transfer following command from self to object.”

I breathed in as much as I could before uttering the following words.

“Wide-area seal activate from points A, B, C, D”

Then the bottom of the spear started to shoot a beam of light into the sky as four other beams also shot, a few moments later these five beams of light met and started to mingle with each other, eventually disappearing from view.

“I did it!” I exclaimed. With this seal, nothing can get out or get inside, whether it be electric waves, people, or more beasts.

Just when I started to live here, I had already planted four spears hidden from view in four different areas just in case because I had a feeling this kind of attack might happen.

My own thoughts and mental state might have been degrading but when it comes to things like this I don’t slack off.

Now then… time to meet up with Eden. I thought as I ran and jumped on rooftop houses. I don’t know where she is now, so I’ll just have to keep jumping and find him!

***

I turned around and laid down on the concrete road as the view of the sky was in view…

Five different beams of light all shot up into the sky and intertwined with each other but a few moments later they disappeared from view.

Is that… Lumi? I’m glad she managed to seal this place. Meanwhile I’ve just dealt with two hordes and I’m already in this state. People must be dying while I’m here just laying down not moving.

I won’t say that I want to save everyone but I at least want to save people that I can and be seen as a good person.

So that’s why I need to get up! I thought as I sat up straight first and then I used all the strength that I have to stand up. “It hurts…!” I uttered as I stood up.

Using my functional left leg, I started walking.

***

Half-an hour later, I reached another street in the subdivision. There I saw three of them, munching on three people.

A mom, dad, and daughter… huh. They’re already dead.

Can I handle these? With my current state probably not. But I was planning to die anyway, so at this point it doesn’t matter whether or not I fulfill the promise.

She was a nice person too… but there’s also the matter of Kiara too, yeah. I thought as I gripped the crystal knife in my right hand even tighter.

So, sorry. And with my mental apology, I ran as fast as I could even with my injured leg.

It hurts… but if I just keep running the pain won’t bother me!

The three beasts notice me and all of them rush at me just as I dashed towards them. “Haaah!” As I screamed, I managed to stab the first one through its head then a couple seconds later I pull out the knife and start to go for the second one.

The second one jumped at me like the one’s from the earlier horde, but I crouched and quickly pierced its under from underneath.

One more! I thought as I quickly pulled out the knife and turned back but I was late. The third beast had already pinned me down but I kept going and held it mouth shut with my left hand.

This is bad…

A few moments later, my left hand lost its strength and the beast took that opportunity to put it in its mouth and bite down on it. “Aaaaahh!”

I can’t stab it; it has one of its paws on my right arm so I can’t even move it. This hurts so much…! So, this is the limit of an ordinary human like me…

Before all of this, I was just nothing special, just ordinary… I recalled my conversation with Lumi last night…

***

“Control?”

“To be more specific, it’s like you can move your blood as an extension of your body, you can try moving it and form it into any shape within the limits of your own mental image.”

“I see, so that’s what it is…”

***

That’s right! I have that. But can I really do it? When I tried to control Lumi’s blood last night, I only managed to move it just for a moment.

Right now, that’s all I can do, I still can’t shape it. I wonder… How did I do it that night?

That red wall of blood. Back then… I didn’t even know I had it, so did I just subconsciously use it?

Every single life form has an instinct to avoid death. When concerned that life form will do anything it can do to simply avoid its own death.

Is that it? I don’t know.

All I have to do now is just try or else I’ll end up dying without even doing any good. “M—Move!” I shouted as I tried to imagine the blood come out from the wound in my leg and push back this beast that tackled me.

Right now, just move, with all my strength and will, surely, I can move it!

For a long time, I have always had doubts within myself. I barely had any self-confidence.

But just this moment please… let me trust myself. Even though I have no intention of forgiving myself of my past sins…

Just this once, I want to believe in myself.

I need to believe in myself so I can at least repay the kindness that Lumi gave to me, the kindness that Kiara gave to me when she interacted with me, the kindness that Rose gave to me when she heard out my troubles!

“Haaaaaaaaaah!” I screamed as loud as I can whilst putting all my energy into imagining it.

I once again recalled our conversation last night

***

“It’s because our soul archetype, the physical manifestation of our souls, exists there in the 2nd dimension. Think of a puppet connected to strings, we are both the puppet and puppet master at the same time.”

“So, you mean there’s strings or threads connecting the soul and the body?”

“Yes, now that I think about it, it’s really simple now that I break it down.”

***

So, that’s it. I just simply needed to connect that string.

That one single thread that’s blended in with others. I just need to grab onto it and pull! Then in that moment, for an instant it felt everything had been connected as I felt every single nerve within my body.

Then, blood started to leak out from the wound in my leg and formed a fist. “Go!!!” I shouted as the fist made out of my blood quickly moved and punched the beastman that had me cornered to the ground.

“owoooo!” It howled as it flew and crashed on a nearby house.

“Did it I do it?” I muttered as the first made out of blood dropped and deformed back into a regular puddle of blood. “I-I’m tired…” I uttered as I heavily breathed in and out.

Both my right leg and left arm hurt like hell! I still can’t believe that I did it though… Even if it’s just for a few seconds, I actually did it…

“Blergh…” I feel nauseated… this must be the price for using my power. Well, it makes sense. I used my own blood after all.

I don’t know if I’ll be able to do it again though. Maybe when this is over, I’ll ask Lumi if she can train me. She’s strong after all.

But what now? I can’t move. Lumi probably already sealed this area if she is the one behind those beams of light earlier. So, can I just stay here and rest? I don’t know.

There might still be more there that’s feeding on people. I don’t want to just leave this to Lumi. Even if I’ve already dispatched three hordes of them.

I still need to keep going…

Wait, now that I think about it, I used up a lot of blood earlier when I dealt with the last one didn’t I? Am I still good? I don’t know.

I’m going to end up dying because of blood loss. She did mention this yesterday… What can I even do now? “Eden!!!” Someone shouted as I was deeply absorbed in my own thoughts…

From the corner of my eye, I saw Lumi running towards me, a few moments later she reached me and stood just beside me with her head down as if she was staring right into my eyes. “Took you long enough.” I said as my mouth slightly curved into a smile.

“Sorry, I didn’t know where you were so I ended up jumping all over the place.”

“You don’t need to apologize; it was my fault that I ended up like this.”

“No, it’s also mine, I recklessly transferred nanomachines into you this morning because you said you didn’t want to waste energy during the day and because of that you ended up in this mess because the timer on the nanomachines expired.”

“I see…” I closed my eyes to rest.

I’m really tired. I slowly opened my eyes again to see her face really close to me with just a bit more push. Our faces would make contact. “Close…”

“Ah, sorry.” She pulled away and stood up straight.

Now that I look at her from this angle, she looks really cute…

“Is the attack already over?” I asked.

“Nope, there’s still a few hordes left.”

“Then, let’s get moving, we can’t afford to waste anymore time here, we need to end them as fast as possible.”

“Right… but your wounds!”

“Oh yeah, I can’t exactly move right now… you can just leave me here for the time being and go on ahead.”

“Nope, tell me where did you get wounded?”

“On my right leg and left arm, why do you ask?”

“Because…” She uttered as she took the knife from my hand and leaned in closer to the wound on my right leg. In the next moment she used the knife to cut her wrist and let the blood flow from her wrist into my own wound.

Half a minute later the cut in her wrist closes up.

“What are you-“ I said but didn’t finish my sentence as I was surprised as the wound healed itself.

“How did you do that?” I exclaimed as I sat up straight and looked at the area where the wound once was.

It’s completely healed, it’s like it was never even wounded.

“It’s just a one-time thing, you see whenever my blood enters someone else’s blood streams, the healing factor that’s inside my blood will mingle with yours and spread to your entire body, but it won’t work a second time.”

“Why is that?”

“I don’t know myself. It’s just something I figured out on my own.”

“I see…” I commented as I moved my left arm.

Even this is healed…

“Then shall we go? There’s still a few more hordes out there.” She said as she reached her arm out to me.

“Yeah, let’s go.” I also reached out for her arm and she helped me stand up.

“Oh, and also here.” She added as she handed back the knife.

“Thanks.” I mentioned.

“You’re welcome.” She replied as we both started to walk.

***

“By the way… how many hordes did you kill before you found me there?” I asked Lumi as we were heading to the next street to check for another horde.

“Only one beast, after I set up the seal, I focused on finding you after all. I didn’t encounter any other hordes.” She responded.

“I see, then how many are left?”

“I don’t know but it seems to have gotten quieter. I don’t hear anyone screaming.”

“That’s either a bad or good sign.”

“Why is that?”

“Bad because it might mean that everyone’s dead already, good because it means it’s over.”

“So, that’s why.” It’d be good if it’s already over, but I still have this bad feeling creeping up on me.

I didn’t get a good look earlier when I saw them attacking but there should be at least six or seven more hordes excluding the three that I’ve already killed.

I hope that some people are still alive, if all of them ended up dying then this battle would’ve been useless.

There’s no reason to fight these things if I didn’t even care about civilians. Doing good deeds is one of the reasons why I wanted to help Lumi in the first place.

I could’ve just denied Lumi and moved on with my life doing what regular people would call good deeds. But, that’s not enough.

If those regular good deeds would’ve been enough for me to atone for what I’ve done, then I wouldn’t be in this situation in the first place. I would be moving on with my life if I didn’t do those stupid things.

By now I would’ve had a healthy social life, like having friends to hang out with or focusing on my studies aiming for a future career if only I didn’t do it. The possibilities are endless for the life I could’ve had.

Whenever I did my grocery runs in the supermarket in that mall, I always saw people my age hanging out, families getting along with each other, I felt a bit jealous.

I used to have friends but when I realized what I’ve done, I cut ties and slowly drifted away from them. I didn’t want to hurt them so; they’d be better off without me.

I’m done hurting people. I don’t know what my past self was thinking when he did those things…

I hate him… he was self-centered, selfish, and arrogant to boot.

I also hate my current self. Even though I’ve changed and stopped acting like that, I still thoughtlessly say things that can hurt people from time to time.

I wanted to change one more time, but I can’t.

I don’t know how… so that’s why I’m better off dead.