Chapter 8:

Sweet Denial

Left Behind

A day had passed.

I wasn't able to sleep very well due to my mind being filled with new thoughts that i wasn't able to shut up.

As i was walking to school, i saw a familiar figure not so far away.

This is going to be awkward... but okay. I need to start doing things properly.

I sped up my walk to catch up with her, and i spoke as calmly as i could, as if to hide my anxiousness, which she will probably notice.

-Good morning, Minami.

She turned around with a weirdly calm look in her face which im really not used to.

-Weird.

I could feel her words stab into my chest with no mercy at all.

-At least say it back so i can feel a bit better about it?!

She giggled at my obvious struggle. She always does this. Why does she keep doing it even now?!

-Well, it's weird. Besides knowing you, this must be hard to do. I'll give you a bit of credit for that.

And here we go again... I feel like i always revert back a whole year when im with Minami. My anxiousness always comes out with her, and im too used to letting it show instead of fighting it.

We didn't speak to each other at all the rest of the way to school, which wasn't very long to begin with. We just waved at each other as we split up at the entrance, since i felt it'd be weird for me to follow her around...

-Kata-chan, good morning!

I could feel a playful slap on my shoulder as Koharu appeared next to me full of energy, as usual.

-Good morning, Koharu.

-Didn't sleep?

-The usual.

-It must be hard... Not like i'd know, though.

Koharu flashed her most brilliant smile as she failed to have the slightest bit of empaty for me.

-You're the worst.

And with Koharu's lack of tact, class started, and uneventfully followed through out the day. One thing was incredibly different though, and it was that today we had mock exams.

I didn't prepare at all for these. They are mock exams though, so i think i'll be fine. Except for math. Im terrible at it, and i will always be.

For a second, i really though about answering these randomly so i could get more sleep in, but i stopped myself.

To be fair, i do think it'd be pretty pathetic of me to not do well in mock exams out of all things, so i might aswell answer these with at least some degree of effort...

As my pen moved pretty steadily, i finished up in about 45 minutes and figured it was time for me to bring back the best thing about not having trouble with these; taking a nap.

-Time's up. Hand over your tests in order when i call your name, then you're all free to leave.

I woke up with Haruno-sensei closing out the mock exams.

A lot of people were looking at me with a bit of disgust as i looked around.

The mood in the classroom felt incredibly heavy and tense with everyone being so oddly focused, so i felt a bit suffocated... im sorry?

No, wait. Why do i feel like i have to apologize to begin with? I'd be bored if i didn't sleep. Well, whatever.

A bell rang, and i realized that it was time for our lunch break. I stood up and looked next to me, as the person i was searching for spoke.

-Kata-chan, come with me!

I didn't even answer to Koharu, who stood up next to me. I just followed her without hesitation. Otherwise, i'd probably end up going as quick as possible to a quiet place and spend my break doing absolutely nothing.

-Koharu-chan, mind if i join you to the cafeteria?

A familiar voice interrupted us from walking out of the classroom.

I stopped myself from letting out a "ugh" loudly as i realized who it was.

Yeah, i figured this would end up happening some day...

-Like i would! Please, come with us, or this young lady over here will fade away without talking to someone that isn't me...

-Try a bit harder if you're going to pretend to cry...

-Alright, alright, i get it. Let's get going, Kata-chan, Nie-chan.

Minami had joined us for lunch break.

We both looked at each other and nodded, before walking behind her.

I should have been well aware that Koharu was going to try to get me closer to Minami by doing stuff like this. Well, i can't say i don't appreciate the help, cause i really am terrible when it comes to approaching not only her, but people in general.

-How did the mock exams go for both of you?

Minami deliberately asked this in a polite and formal speech, to further mess with Koharu, who probably didn't have a good time.

-Ugh, please don't mention exams further more, Nie-chan...

She looks half dead... did she really just answer a few tests?!

-As usual, i think.

I gave out a oddly short remark. I feel weird, i don't know if i should talk to her like i do to Koharu, or if i should just keep acting like i did with her...

-Your usual is pretty warped though, Akane.

-Yeah, yeah. How about you, Minami?

-I'll be fine. At least, better than Koharu-chan.

I giggled at her answer. I feel kinda bad for teaming up on Koharu, but im sorry, i need to act normal somehow and this seems like a easy cop out.

-It takes a lot of talent to fail as bad as her in mock exams out of all things...

Koharu hasn't been smiling for a while now, since she's looking at both of us with disdain.

-For how much of a pain both of you are, you sure do get along, dont you?

Minami panicked for a second and quickly waved her hands from side to side, as if to deny it.

-I don't know about that, Koharu-chan...

I was going to give out a normal answer like "I guess" or "I think we do?", but Minami's hesitation to do so stopped me.

Of course, i do want to know why... but i feel like sharing a small sense of distance with each other is the first step we can take towards resolving our feelings...

Well, my feelings at least.

-But you do get along well with Kata-chan. What's with those sly looks, the oddly familiar jabs at each other and the first name basis?

-Koharu-chan, it's nothing new, we just...

-We just?

-Minami?

This hesitation again... is she trying to keep hidden that we knew each other beforehand?

You are doing a terrible job, though...

She has no idea Koharu already knows, and Koharu's doing a incredible job at playing dumb.

-Nothing. You sure do have a talent for prying on other people's problems, Koharu.

-What am i supposed to do? Both of you teamed up on me first!

She brought back the banter from before, as she used the small window to swapped to her usual friendly mask as if to hide the hesitation she showed earlier.

I know Koharu might forget about it, but im well used to noticing these changes on you, you idiot.

-That being said, we're actually getting results for our mock exams when we head back. Koharu-chan, i doubt you did that bad..

-Even if i did, i'll work hard for the actual exams!

Eh?

Was it my imagination, or did Minami's expression change to something more strained, and hurt for a second?

No, it can't be just my imagination.

-Koharu, you don't even believe that yourself.

I jumped back to the conversation from before while keeping a close eye on Minami.

-I know already... Well, if anything happens one of you will have to teach me.

Ugh... i don't like that idea.

-Akane is a good teacher, you should look into it!

Minami cheerfully dropped some misinformation about my abilities to Koharu.

-Why do you act like you know when you get full marks on everything to begin with?!

-Do i smell some jealousy from Kata-chan?

-Of course not. I'd die from overwork if i tried studying half as hard as Minami does.

Minami stayed silent and looked pretty dark for a second again... was it "work", or "overwork"?

Maybe it's a bit of a stretch, but my gut is telling me otherwise. I know this girl well enough to read her changes in expression like this.

Something's wrong... i have to know.

As our lunch break ended, we went back to class and proceeded with our day normally, until it was time to head back home.

Okay, i should have enough time...

I stood up quickly, and spoke to Koharu as i was walking out of the classroom.

-Koharu, don't wait for me, i have something to do today.

-Eh? Alright, take care?

She seemed pretty confused, im sorry for today at least, Koharu.

I rushed down the hallways and towards the entrance gate, checking my phone.

I should be fine...

After jogging for about 10 minutes, i got to my destination and i sat on a bench nearby, while i had a clear view of everyone that passed by.

I left early to wait for Minami a bit further down the street, on the way to the convenience store i went to yesterday.

If she really does work here, then im quite sure i can run into her on the way here after school, specially given what i heard yesterday.

About 10 minutes passed where i was waiting here. And as i thought, Minami walked near by.

I waved at her from a distance, and our eyes met.

She noticed me, and after looking around for some reason, she walked up to me.

-What are you doing here?

She seemed oddly nervous, so i figured from her reaction, this is probably where she's working. Im not sure if it's only that, though.. Im going to have to ask Koharu about it.

-Yesterday one of the employees here asked me to tell you something.

I could visually see how she panicked about me mentioning "employee".

-Next time you miss a shift for whatever reason, call in. They were worried about you.

Minami looked down at the ground and didn't answer.

-If that's all, im leaving. Im sorry to ambush you like that, i thought bringing it up at school wasn't a good idea.

-Ah, so that's it.

Her voice seemed a bit... aggressive.

-You aren't going to ask anything else, right?

-I don't want to bother you any more, your shift is starting now, isn't it?

I lied. I do want to bother her about it, but...

-Then why do you do this if you don't want to bother me?! It was your fault that i didn't come here yesterday to begin with, and now you show up to remind me? I don't need it, and i don't need you to be here at all.

Minami gasped shortly before covering her mouth with both her hands in surprise.

She lashed out at me.

So my hunch was right... something is wrong with her and it's either related to her working part time here, or maybe something else?

-Im sorry, i shouldn't be taking it out on you like this...

I stood up and picked up my things.

My body felt a bit heavy, and it took me a good effort to muster up the courage to talk to her as if nothing happened.

-I'll come check on you later. When does your shift end?

Her face was filled with shock for a second before she quickly reacted and composed herself.

-By 9:00PM. If you want to talk, don't come late. I can't really afford to waste much time, so i hope you're fine with the time it takes to walk to the station.

I nodded, and waved goodbye to her.

This is fine, right?...

No, wait.

This isn't completely what i want to do. What am i doing?

-Minami, take care of yourself, alright?

I ran back and stopped her by holding her hand.

Im not sure how fast i ran, but my heartbeat was growing faster and faster, and my breathing was completely unstable.

Minami looked back at me, and winked at me.

-I'll be fine, so don't worry about me.

That isn't the face i wanted you to tell me that with...

Well, i guess she'd feel bad about giving me a negative answer when we have to split up like this.

I walked slowly back home, growing more and more tired with each step i took.