Chapter 3

The following Monday, as I made my way out of the lecture room, I met Mr. Kang. He handed me some papers and asked me to give them to Mr. Lee who was a teacher who worked in the IT building.

Miles was also an IT student along with Will and Sam. I wish he wasn't there because I did not wanted to come across him when I went to the building. 

When I stepped out of Mr. Lee's office, I saw Miles walking out of a lecture room. I looked at him for a while as if to admire him. 

He was six feet tall and had fair skin. He had jet black hair cut into a mullet. He wore a blue T-shirt with black jeans and had a backpack slung over his shoulder. His beautiful brown small eyes and sharp nose had all of my attention. It felt like his eyes were going to trap me in. 

He was talking to a guy and he laughed as he talked. He had a beautiful laugh. His teeth looked like a bunny's teeth. 

When I was done looking at him as if to drink in his tantalizing features, I turned around as I did not want him to see me but unfortunately, he had already recognized me and started to follow me. 

"Lisa, what are you doing here?," he asked, with a smile on his face.

I didn't answer him and continued walking. 

"Lisa, wait!," he said and grabbed my hand. 

He let go as soon as I turned around to see him. I didn't know what to say. I was embarrassed and I did not know why I was blushing. 

"What are you doing here? Are you here to see Will and Sam?," he asked. 

I nodded. 

"Oh well, they're in the cafeteria. I was making my way to the cafeteria too. Wanna come along?," he asked.  

"No, I'm not hungry. I don't wanna go to the cafeteria," I said. 

"Oh, I see," he said.

I quickly turned around again and started to walk away. My heart was racing very fast right now. 

"Umm, Lisa," he said.

I turned around again. 

"Are you prepared for the exams?," he asked. 

"Yeah. But not that much," I answered and left. 

I didn't wanted to talk to him anymore. It wasn't that I didn't wanted to. It was that I couldn't. I felt very uneasy when I talked to him. More like shy. It seemed like something was wrong with me. I couldn't even bring myself to look him in the eye. My heart was about to explode out of my chest. 

Maybe it was because I felt guilty. But what was I feeling guilty for? Was I feeling guilty of not returning his feelings when he was in love with me? Was I feeling guilty of not asking him for permission before doing it with him? But why did I needed to ask for permission? None of us were drunk and both of us wanted to do it. 

Maybe I should have asked him about his feelings in the club first? I wouldn't have done anything with him if I knew what he felt for me. But didn't he already convey all of his feelings to me when we kissed? If things were already so clear to me, why was I feeling so guilty now? 

But if I was guilty, I wouldn't have been admiring his features from afar. If I would've felt guilty, I would've never even thought of him when I entered this building. If I would've felt guilty, I wouldn't have wanted him to continue talking to me with a smile on his face. If I would've actually felt guilty, I wouldn't have been thinking about him now. 

I couldn't understand why was I feeling all of these emotions..I was not like this earlier. 

When I was about to leave the building, I met Will. Sam was with him too. 

Will was at least five foot eight inches in height. Sam was just an inch taller than him. Will had a large hawk-like nose and beautiful brown eyes. His skin was a little tanned and he had long black hair. He wore a black shirt with blue jeans. 

Sam had small eyes like Miles. He had beautiful pale skin and was muscular. He had long hair too but his hair weren't as long was Will's. Both him and Will had very sharp jawlines. He wore a white shirt with blue jeans. 

They asked me why I was there and I told them about Mr. Kang's request. 

"Lisa, what's up with you and Miles?," Sam asked. "Will told me that you hooked up with him and he confessed to you. That wasn't true, right?." 

I looked at Will. I didn't wanted Sam to know but now that he knew it I couldn't hide it. 

"It's true. What Will told you is true," I answered. 

"So, are you dating him?," he asked. 

"I'm not. You know I've never dated anybody," I said. 

"You could try," he said. 

"And end up like you?," I asked. 

Sam gulped. He knew I was taunting at him and Hannah breaking up. 

"That was very mean, Lisa," Will said. 

"I don't care," I said. "And after all, it's your fault that I even had sex with Miles. You guys didn't come with me on Friday. Now don't blame me for what happened." 

Will rolled his eyes.

"I should go now. I have a class," I said. 

"Look, everyone knew that Miles had always liked you. You were just the one that didn't know about his feelings," Sam said. 

"I've already told you that I don't care about his feelings. To me, it was just the same as the rest of the Fridays I've hooked up on," I said. "If Miles has always liked me then I'm sure that he also knows that I'm not someone for dating and love. He should stop liking me." 

"It's not that easy to stop liking someone if you've liked them for a long time," Will said. 

"Like you're one to talk. Who have you liked for a long time? No one, right?," I said. "And you know what, Will? You should mind your own business and not interfere in other people's lives." 

He was shocked at what I said. And why would he not be? We have always been on good terms and I've never talked to either Sam or Will in this way. 

I couldn't talk to them any longer as I felt like I had destroyed everything. 

"Good day," I said and walked away. 

When I came home, I was thinking about what I had said to Will. I felt really bad about my words. I knew I had to apologize to him so I called him. 

"Hi," he said.

"Hi, Will. I called you because I wanted to apologize for what I said to you today," I said, anxious. "I can apologize, right? Everything is not destroyed, right?."

"Of course not. I accept your apology," he said. "You just spoke the truth. I didn't feel bad about anything you said. You don't need to worry." 

"Then that means we're still good?," I asked. 

"What do you mean by still? We were good and we will always be," he said. 

I laughed. 

"Then I was worried for anything," I said, sighing. "Oh, could I talk to Sam? I wanna apologize to him, too." 

"What do you wanna apologize to him for?," he asked. 

"Did you forget? I taunted him about his breakup with Hannah," I said. 

"Oh, that? Well, they got back. They made up with each other," he said. 

"What? Really?," I said, laughing. "Well, that's a good thing. I was actually quite shocked when I got the news that they broke up. They were together for three years, after all. But now, I'm totally convinced that they're made for each other. They really can't live without each other." 

"I'm happy for them, too," he said. "Oh, umm, Lisa, what did you think about Miles?." 

"What about him?," I asked. 

I knew what he meant but I wanted him to say it clearly.

"Are you gonna be with him now or not?," he asked. 

"What do you think?," I asked, taking a bite out of my chocolate cake. 

"Does it matter what I think? You're gonna do what you want," he said. 

"Yeah and you know what I'm gonna do. I'm not gonna date him. I won't approach him and if he does, I won't give him a chance to come close to me," I said. 

"My God, Lisa! You're hopeless," he said. 

"I'm not hopeless, Will. You are!," I said. "You're hopelessly wanting to change me and you're hopelessly wanting me to date Miles and fall in love with him. And you know very well that won't happen." 

"Ah, why am I even trying to have this conversation with you when I know nothing gets into that stupid head of yours?," he said. "I should really stop doing this. But I'm telling you, Lisa, he will approach you very soon and you might actually fall in love with him." 

"In your dreams, Will. In your dreams," I said. "I'm hanging up now. I gotta study." 

"Fine, I gotta study too. Sam's waiting for me," he said. 

"You're very lucky that you share your apartment with him. He's a good person," I said. 

"I know," he said and hung up on me. 

I sighed. 

Will had said the words I didn't wanted to hear at all. The mere thought that I would fall in love with Miles was scary. I didn't wanted to experience a lie. I didn't wanted him to say those words to me again because it made my heart hurt and ears bleed.

Now that I knew that something was gonna happen very soon, I had to be cautious. Avoiding Miles had become my number one priority since Friday but now I had to be even more careful. I would do my best to stay away from Will and Sam in the university because Miles usually was close to wherever they were. 

I thought I'd stop going to the university but I knew that was a stupid choice as there were only some weeks left for my exams now and there were still some lectures I needed to attend. 

The best I could do was not go to the building he studied in and the cafeteria because I didn't wanted him to look at me again and come talk to me. Neither did I wanted to look at him and drown in his beautiful features. 

The reason I never hooked up with a man I knew was because I always knew he would end up catching feelings for me. And I never wanted Miles to fall for me. I was also afraid of falling for a man I knew too. I should have considered this first before having sex with him. I should have thought of the repercussions. I regret having sex with him. 

But I still couldn't forget how I was admiring Miles today. I couldn't understand why I was doing that. I couldn't understand why his smile and laugh seemed to enticing to me. But maybe, the thing I never wanted to happen in my life might happen now. 

I might fall for Miles.