Chapter 7:

The Pain in Your Heart

The Guardian of Hope (Sigma Version)


The locales and travelers drank merrily to live music, creating a warm atmosphere. Alejandro gulped down the house-made blend, drowsily observing the ritual of the jolly drunkards in the bar’s dark corner. The absence of her whimsical presence left a hollow impression. No matter how much he drank, he couldn’t put her in the back of his mind. Her energy harkened repressed memories.

He recalled when they arrived at the western entrance near the wanderer’s worn shack. His body ached while dragging his feet, listening to her boundless enthusiasm. Her combative prowess impressed was beyond anything he imagined. Her strength rivaled his without argument, yet all he could impart was worthless knowledge.

Smoke rose from the distant chimneys of the sea of buildings. He salivated after catching whim of the distinctive scent of a warm meal laced within the gentle autumn breeze. They stood at a barren tree; Its browned leaves rested around its thick, rotten base. Her steps rustled with each step before placing her hand against the tree’s rough bark. She turned toward him, brimming with life, adding color to the world around her. He leaned against the tree, observing her, waiting to see what she would say upon seeing her pursing lips.

“The beauty of fall,” she said, picking up a leaf from the tree’s base.

“You mean the rotting land?” he asked, drawing her glance. “Quite beautiful indeed.”

“Now you’re just being a downer. It’s a time when things wither to the encroaching winter. There’s a sense of desolation about seeing something once vibrant become so drab.”

“It’s a cycle.”

“A cycle, you say? I suppose that’s one way of looking at it.”

“Eh?”

She held her smile while he looked away from her. The wanderer steeled his emotions before allowing a nostalgic pain to flourish; Her presence set a constant reminder. Enne discerned sadness in his eyes, unsure of how to respond. She recalled glimpses of his foreign memories when she touched him.

“Cycles only exist for as long as you allow them,” she continued. “At some point, there may be no fall nor spring—Some things take time to heal. But, it’s all a matter of perspective.”

“Well, we were talking science.”

She broke out in laughter, releasing the leaf into the breeze.

“I understand elves view mana as a pragmatic force. But, it’s difficult to dismiss its spiritual aspects. Depending on who wields it, mana creates as it can destroy. You’ve been out there—In Ethoxian-occupied territories. You’ve seen how they rule.”

“I have. Gardenia is—Much different. But, why didn’t your father rejoin?”

Her ears perked, looking at him with wonder.

“What did you and my brother talk about?” she asked.

“Nothing of consequence.”

“Well—I don’t know, to be honest with you.”

Enne stroked her chin as the leaves rustled around their feet. If he wanted to know the truth, centuries of history would be his to figure out. Her eyes traced the grassy field under the chorus of birds lingering around the barren trees.

“I know this is changing the topic, but—” she spoke.

“No, please, go on,” he invited.

“Why is it that wanderers choose to live alone?”

“Hm? I’d think you’d understand by now. You know, being stigmatized since the Collapse.”

“I guess, I really meant to ask you, specifically.”

“Well—”

His aged-gray beard, wary amber eyes, and ghastly appearance evoked a powerful reaction within her heart. She lived a sheltered life, one in which she could sleep comfortably. She couldn’t imagine living in a dirty shack or scrounging for food day by day. As troublesome a thought it was, it was a simple reality for many. She placed her hand over her heart, grasping its fabric.

“I live a life of privilege,” she acknowledged, maintaining her contact, hoping to gauge his. “I’ll never know what you’ve gone through, but—”

“You don’t have to. Strange anyone would pity a wanderer. Being emotional about things that can’t be changed—"

“It doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t be treated any less. You weren’t born a wanderer—”

“That’s exactly it, En.”

His tone echoed a wallowed pain, countering like she expected he would. His rough appearance hid the wisdom he offered; She believed there was a place for him to thrive in Gardenia.

“Allie,” she continued. “You can do so much more.”

“My biggest regret was becoming—This,” he responded. “I used to think I could change the world. All this acquired knowledge for centuries, but who cares?”

“I care! Along with others clinging to hope.”

“Change—It’s just a fool’s errand.”

“There’s the problem.”

“What’s that?”

“Maybe… You should rely on someone you can trust. You and I are no different.”

Alejandro reflected on his former idealistic self. With time, he thought he could do anything, but without the right catalysts, it was impossible. Everywhere he went, he found complacency, but many also didn’t want to associate with a traitor of humanity. He glanced over, finding familiar patience.

“And what do you want to do?” he asked.

“I want to change the world,” she answered with unshakeable resolve.

She frowned at his chuckling outburst.

“Is that—funny to you?”

“The world… It doesn’t change for anyone. Even if you did, it’ll be full circle. Imagine all that work overturned within decades, years even. I’ve seen it, I’ve lived it—”

“They failed to do it right!”

Her impassioned anger sent a jolt throughout his body.

“Is it that easy to look at another’s suffering and say that’s just the way it is?”

Alejandro averted his eyes, struggling to retort. He felt a familiar warmth in his hands. Alejandro looked at Enne, her softened eyes that plead for him to reconsider. Her anger was long gone, replaced by the initial compassion she brought from the beginning.

“Don’t throw all that potential away because you feel you can’t do it,” she said.

“En, I—”

“Please reconsider. Come by my home again. Two nights—I know I’ve probably annoyed you to no end today.”

“It’s not—”

“No—No need to be modest. All I ask is that you think about the possibilities. The world may have not changed with others, but—Opportunities exist. There’s no need to live life in the shadows if you can shed light on the world out there.”

Her encouraging words sunk while maintaining his gaze on her.

“Why?” he uttered.

“Because there is so much darkness in your heart.”

Enne reluctantly released his hands, hoping her words reached him. The familiar warmth slowly faded as she turned away. He didn’t understand her sympathy for him. Alejandro watched her walk away without saying a word. His heart dropped as his memories trickled into his blurred sight.

The braided red hair.

I know you’re right, he teared up.

“Hey buddy,” a voice spoke through his delusion.

Alejandro snapped out of his trance, finding Jeb sitting across the table. He felt the wet stream of tears along his face, wiping them away. The lager still had the froth layering over it, not having touched it since he spaced out.

“I—Um, don’t have a way to pay for that,” the wanderer said, clearing his throat.

“Don’t worry about it—Drink up responsibly. From the boss lady herself.”

Boss lady? The wanderer thought.

Alejandro pulled the mug toward him while Jeb nodded to the fast-paced guitar strums. The drunken choir’s rhythm was off-key, their words equally incoherent as they sung in distinct tones. Jeb turned back to find his patron’s low chuckle.

“What a mess of a chorus,” Alejandro noted; The bartender chuckled along. “How’s your brother?”

“He’s doing fine. He’s still adjusting, but he’ll be out soon.”

“It’ll be hard for him to readjust.”

Alejandro took another swig from the hefty mug, whilst piecing together his scattered thoughts. He couldn’t shake his time with Enne and her request. He looked toward the merry bunch, looking at their relative peace as they hollered and belched. The wanderer nodded before redirecting his attention toward Jeb. If it weren’t for their meeting before, he would’ve never thought he was Derek’s son. Quiet and patient, he differed quite greatly from him.

“Say,” Jeb continued. “How long are you planning to stay in town?”

“After living hundreds of years,” he answered. “There’s still plenty of lands to explore, towns to check out.”

“How does that even feel?”

“Hm? You just get used to it. If I had to be honest, no point in attaching yourself to anyone.”

“That’s cold-blooded, brother. I think at some point we all come across something worth attaching to. Like, c’mon man, you easily look like you’re in your 30s and have a full head of hair. You’re telling me no one’s been interested in you?”

“Uh, my way of living isn’t necessarily appealing.”

“Well, that ain’t living. We grow old, have families, and teach our kids the right way to live—”

The wanderer politely waved in disagreement, masking his annoyance.

“That is one way to live, but there are other ways that are just as enlightening. Some choose a solitary path to find peace.”

“Eh, is there peace in what you’re doing now?”

“No. It’s—Complicated.”

“This could be a new opportunity for you since you’re here! You should stick around, just for a little while. I saw you and Enne hanging out the other day. She seemed to like your company!”

“You don’t say?”

“Well, she’s a really complicated one. Women, right?”

“Just people in general.”

Jeb chuckled, taking the empty mug before returning to his duties.

“Well, don’t let a good thing slip by,” he said. “Catch you around.”

Alejandro watched him merge with the livelier patrons. It seemed that he couldn’t get away from her influence. Her natural allure managed to lower his guard at every opportunity, even when she wasn’t around. His tired breath escaped his lips as he sunk into his seat. Perhaps Jeb had a point, experiencing something new would make for a change of pace.

I’ll let destiny decide where all this goes, the wanderer conceded.




This 3rd additional chapter molded our hero's gravitation toward the other.
If you recall the previous chapter, Enne's powers are awakening.
Destiny... I often tie that to a more romantic notion, but...

Under the initial drafts, their romantic link didn't have a build-up, it just sorta happened.
I feel the need to add a bit of a grounded perspective so I tried my best to emphasize their relationship.
The imagery in this chapter is probably one of my favorites in the overall story.
Well~ What do you think? :3

-june-
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