Hirano & Decisions: Part One

Make it up to her…? How?

I know what I did. And it was that type of selfish thinking that hurt her.

And I care.

It’s that simple.

But if it’s going to keep on being like this, with her being hurt time and time again, then Akito is right. I’d rather stop getting involved with her altogether.

‘I don’t want to be the one to make her cry. To make it so she regrets what she’s doing.’

I really don’t… I wasn’t lying when I said that. After I make things right I’m going to distance myself. It’s for the best…

The day was almost over. The sun had set hours ago and Katsumi was lying on his couch, staring blankly at the ceiling.

“She’s not gonna be there… What am I thinking.” Katsumi mumbled to himself.

He stood up and approached the hole in the wall that he put in between their apartments.

“Arata…?”

No response came like he expected.

“Are you there?”

A minute of silence passed.

“Yeah.” Mayumi’s voice answered.

Relief washed over Katsumi. “Are you doing alright?”

“...I could be better.”

“...I don’t think I’ve seen you all week.”

No response came from Mayumi.

“I—I want to make it up to you… I want to make things right.”

More silence came from Mayumi.

“Arata?”

“It isn’t that simple.”

What?

“I don’t think you can. I… I don’t trust that you can… Last weekend I saw a lot of stuff I wasn’t ready for. I had no idea you’d gone that far.”

This time it was Katsumi who remained quiet.

“You—you hit me, Murakami.”

What is she saying?

“While I was trying to hold you down from running you kicked me in the stomach. There’s still a lot of bruising.”

“I-I had no idea…”

“Murakami, I don’t want to stay on these terms either. I have no clue what this is. If we’re just classmates or friends, I don’t know.” She paused, taking a deep breath. “But I do know that there’s still a lot that you’re keeping from me, so much about yourself that I don’t know… So if this has any chance of working I think I would need to know it all. I want you to tell me everything….”

“Arata—”

“I’m not done talking.” Her voice sounded sharp. “I want to yell right now. I feel like it’s taking so much to not just start screaming at you. I don’t know how I feel, but part of me, it hates you.”

Hates me?

“I still need a bit more time.”

“Mayumi.”

She went quiet.

“I’ll tell you what’s been going on. Alright? So please, just listen.”

                                                                                 ☒ ☒ ☒

I told her about Nara’s friends, the drug use, and almost the entire last year. But I don’t know if she believes me when I say it isn’t that bad. I would have been able to tell if it was… And I still believe that It really wasn’t.

I don’t know if Arata could tell I left out some about Nara though… I don’t think it’s my place to share those things about Nara…

Katsumi stared blankly at a chalkboard that listed the campus-café’s daily specials. He changed his attention to the girl with the black bob-cut sitting across the room. She was quietly tapping away at her smartphone while Yui and Saki were chatting with another girl.

The only time we talked since the incident was last Friday through the wall… I have to make the effort here. I feel like she’s given up already… And before I do, I need to decide how I’ll stick back the pieces I’ve scattered…

“Haa~”

I have no idea what she’d want. What would make her happy…? Maybe I could ask someone… But who’s really close with Arata? I know Nakagawa is. And… Akito…. Let’s just keep it at Nakagawa. Anyone else?

The café was occupied with students, all enjoying the company of their own cliques. Everyone had someone, even the students that were generally seen as ‘weird’ had each other, spending their time laughing like it always had been so.

However, Katsumi found himself at the edge of the room—alone.

I know one more person actually. I think they could help.

As Katsumi leaned forward in his chair, he found an issue with his idea.

But where would I find her…?

It was a little past four in the afternoon and Katsumi was seated at his kitchen island doing homework. Something he felt he hadn't done by himself in a very long time.

She’s probably working right now, it’d be a while until she’s off.

He thought while checking the time on a digital-clock.

Even when she’s off it’s not like I know her schedule… Would it even be alright if I go ask her questions like this? She seemed to know the owner of that cafe… No… There’s very little chance that she’d be there. Especially at this time.

Katsumi sat in silence for a moment, thinking.

Well it’s the only place I know she could be… It doesn’t hurt to try. Plus I’m a bit hungry I guess.

Katsumi changed into something more presentable and slipped on his shoes at the front door. He stepped outside into the corridor and breathed in the early evening air.

Why am I putting so much effort into this…?

He glanced at Mayumi’s front door.

It’s because… Arata shouldn’t have to feel like that.

The walk to the cafe was about seven minutes from Katsumi’s apartment. As he walked the sky began to darken, heavy storm clouds rolled in over the city. He peered up into the sky—a drop of water fell onto his cheek.

It was clear when I left… I really should start watching the weather forecast.

Walking past the windows of the cafe he peered inside. There was a woman wearing a blazer and a pencil skirt leaning on the bar-counter talking to Leon, and a lady standing next to him.

Katsumi looked up at the sign over the cafe. It read ‘Tiffany’s’.

“This feels like some kind of T.V. show… It’s like they’re always here.”

Leon pointed to Katsumi who was standing outside in the rain. The woman leaning on the counter turned around and smiled when she saw who Leon gestured to.

Hirano Kaede…

The other woman went into the kitchen and Kaede walked to the front door.

“Katsumi,” She said as she opened it. “What are you doing out there? You’re getting soaked! Come in!” The wind of the rain-storm was blowing her brown-hair back.