Final Hour Pt. 1

My eyes opened to a spinning fan blowing cold air upon my face. Next to it was a single lightbulb that barely lit up the surrounding area.

What happened...? Why am I here? I thought...

Suddenly, my head burned with an aching pain. My body shot up from the mattress, but my injuries wouldn't allow me to stay up for a second longer—so I fell right back down. Wait... Mattress? Why am I on a mattress?

"Don't move," a girl's voice demanded.

I turned my head slightly to see someone in a familiar cyan jacket. She turned around, which gave me some time to get a proper look at her.

Long, white hair tied into a ponytail, and shining teal eyes with a pair of hollowed diamonds. This woman... is Zephyr, one of the five members of the defective Athenian squad, Calypso.

"You... Ugh—!"

"Hey!" she exclaimed. "Are you alright?"

"Y-yeah... I think so.

"Give me a second. Let me see if I can find some sensory dampeners."

After shuffling around on a nearby desk, she came back and sat on a stool next to me. In her hand was some kind of gun-looking device. She reached for the sheets that covered my body and pulled it off. There was a bandage wrapping around my chest. Blots of red were seeping through in a circle near the center.

With a damp piece of cloth, Zephyr wiped down the excess blood, causing me to wince in pain.

"Be as still as you can," she said. "In case you didn't know, you were shot in the back. The bullet pierced straight through your chest, narrowly missing your heart. I tried my best, but there's only so much I can do with your human body."

"No, it's fine. I appreciate it. Thank you, Miss Zephyr."

"Just 'Zephyr' is fine, Solas."

"O-oh... In that case, thank you, Zephyr."

"Mhm."

Zephyr pointed the tip of the device at my chest and pulled the trigger. A subtle click was heard, and something else I noticed immediately was that the pain was subsiding.

"Can I ask what time it is right now?"

"A quarter past three in the morning," she answered. "You've been out for almost seventeen hours."

A whole seventeen hours. That's kind of crazy, isn't it? And what's even crazier is that I almost died. I knew nothing good would come from meeting Calypso, but I ended up agreeing to it anyway. What's wrong with me?

"Oh, shit...!" I exclaimed. "Where's my jacket?"

"Hm? It's over there. Did you need it?"

"Yeah, please."

After she handed me my jacket, I pulled my phone out of the pocket. Just as I thought, there were multiple missed messages and calls from Mother. She must've been worried sick.

"I need to call my mother," I said. "Is that okay?"

Zephyr nodded her head. "Go for it."

I tapped on her name and held the phone up to my ear. Three rings went by before she picked up.

"Solas?" her voice came through, panicked and worried.

"Mother... I... I'm here."

"Oh gosh. Thank goodness you're okay. Where are you right now?"

"Um... I'm—"

Suddenly, a hand reached for the phone and held it still. I looked up to see who it was, and just like before, my heart dropped.

"...Judan..." I whispered. 

"Solas. Let me... Let me talk to her," she said.

Reluctantly, I let go of the phone. Judan lifted it up and set the call to speaker mode.

"Solas?" Mother called out.

"Misses De Leux," Judan replied. "It's... It's me."

For a moment, there was silence. Judan shut her eyes as if contemplating, and in them, I saw pain and regret like no other. She was Nelia's best friend, often coming over for dinner. Of course, Mother never turned her away, welcoming her with open arms. I can only imagine how she must feel talking to her after all these years.

"Judan..." Mother chuckled. "It's been so long since I've heard your voice. Still fighting the good fight, I see."

"Yes, Ma'am."

"How have you been? Still healthy, I hope."

"Yes, Ma'am."

"You'd better not be skipping out on meals and rest. Nelia didn't teach you girls to overwork yourself. Don't you remember how many corners she cut just so she could have some time to relax?"

Judan bit her lips as her body trembled. From the corner of her closed eyes, tears began to form and subsequently fell.

"...Y-yes, Ma'am..."

"Haha. Judan, my girl. Are you crying?"

"I-I'm sorry, Ma'am... It's just..."

"Oh, there's no need to apologize now. I know you did all you could. I'm just happy to hear that you are alive and well, so do not cry. Do not drown in sorrow. Keep on living. That's what Nelia would've wanted too. Understood?"

"...Yes, Ma'am."

"Good."

Judan took a deep breath and wiped her tears away.

"Misses De Leux. L-listen... For the time being, we're going to keep Solas with us. He has become a target of the High Order. If he goes home now, it would not only put him in danger but you as well."

"Hm... Well, if that's the case, then I can't really disagree, can I? Judan... Keep him safe for me. Please."

"Understood, ma'am. We'll never let the High Order reach him... I swear."

"Thank you. Now, can you hand the phone back to Solas? There's something I need to say to him."

Judan handed the phone back to me. I initially called her because I was worried and wanted to explain everything to her. Since Judan has already done the job for me, it feels like I have nothing else to say. How do I tell her that I've been defective for so long already?

"You know, Sol..." Mother said. "When I told you to live your life the way you wanted, this isn't what I had in mind. But it's certainly nice to see that you take after your sister."

"Nelia? W-wait... Mother, you... You knew?"

She giggled. "What, did you think I was oblivious to how she 'disappeared?' Surprised as you are, my dear, I'm very informed in the affairs of this city... including you."

I couldn't even say anything. This whole time, Mother knew about Nelia being Nemesis. Then that means...

"Then... You knew...?" I mumbled. "That I... T-that I killed Nelia?"

"Solas... You didn't kill her."

"But I played a role in it... Is that right?"

She didn't reply, which only confirmed it.

"How come... you never told me?" I asked.

"How could I? How could I possibly explain that to my little boy? After everything that happened, you were lucky to be allowed a normal life. How could I put all of it back on your shoulders?"

I clasped my hands together and interlocked the fingers, resting my mouth on the top as I bent my body down.

How am I supposed to handle this? I can't, but at the same time, I can't necessarily blame Mother for not telling me either. After all, she's right. There's no way I would've understood the meaning behind her words.

"You know, your sister... was so excited when she was appointed captain of Calypso," Mother said. "She told me all about the girls she had to lead. All the times she went out to catch criminals. She was so happy that she could follow in your father's footsteps. I..."

She took a deep breath and turned her head away as she began to cry.

"I just wanted for her what I wanted for you... to live her life the way she desired," she muttered. "I never thought... it would turn out like this."

A cold, dark feeling slowly washed over me. To think that she had been shouldering this all by herself for the past seven years... It's tearing me apart.

"Mother," I said. "I... I'm going to stay with Calypso. I want to help them in whatever way I can. That means... I'll become a defect. What I did to Nelia... I can't forgive myself, and I can't forgive the High Order for splitting us apart. I'm sorry."

"Hah... Don't apologize, my dear. Instead, just keep moving forward. See all that Nelia saw, and understand why she chose to defect for yourself. But... Do return to me when you get the chance, hm? I miss you."

"...I will."

"Good. Then, goodbye, for now, Sol."

"Goodbye, Mother."

I hung up the call and rested the phone on my lap.

"Solas?"

Judan sat down on the bed and gave me a reassuring look.

"How are you feeling?"

"I... I'm not sure..." I sighed.

Not even Judan could answer that, as her eyes trailed away.

"Rest up for a bit longer," she said. "We'll check back after an hour or two."

With that, the two left the room, leaving me to think on my own. It feels like there's a massive lump forming in my chest. I know I made the choice, and there's no going back, but... What am I supposed to do now? Is there even anything I'm capable of doing on my own?

"Hah... Who do I think I am?"