The Things We Lost, Part 4

Caleb and Tia sauntered through the forest, trudging through fallen trees and burnt grasses. Neither of them had spoken for the last half hour, and because of that, Caleb had no idea what Tia was even trying to do. She seemed to be wandering aimlessly, as if waiting for her partner Aislinn to show up again. He thought to try getting her attention, but at the same time, he figured she'd just keep on ignoring him anyhow.

He turned his attention to the forest around him. If he wasn't going to get Tia to talk to him, then he'd at least take the time to do his job. Not that there was much to see anyhow. The area was covered in splintered wood and spiky branches – not exactly the best place for animals to hide out.

So he thought, but as he continued strolling through the forest, he suddenly heard something in the distance that caught his attention. It sounded like a desperate squeal, one he would have missed if this area wasn't so silent. He turned to call Tia, but thankfully, she had already noticed as well, what with her hearing being much better than his.

The sound was coming from an area that was thickly covered in tall, prickly grass and fragments of charred tree bark. They had been walking around it due to how difficult it would have been to traverse, but right now they didn't have any other options. Caleb took out a machete from his pack and began cutting away at the fallen trees, attempting to carve a safe path to where the noise was coming from.

The cutting somewhat drowned out the sound, but as they got closer, the animal's mews only became louder. Eventually, they found its source: a small rabbit laying meekly on the ground. It's hind leg was pierced by a splintered piece of wood, making the source of the animal's woes clear.

“What are the chances?” Caleb grumbled as he searched through his pack. To his surprise, he couldn't find his first aid kit, and when he realized that Hope may have taken his on accident, Tia had already knelt down and taken out her own kit. As she removed the splinter and dressed the wound, Caleb sat down on a nearby stump and watched her work. When she wasn't throwing him dirty looks and angry scowls, she certainly looked the part of a diligent remainer.

Once the rabbit's wound was bandaged, it hopped off happily, though a little unevenly. Once Tia was sure the rabbit would be fine, she packed up her things and walked off without even a word to Caleb.

“Shouldn't we take that rabbit with us?”

“It'll be fine. Rabbits can take care of themselves. I bet it wandered in here randomly anyhow.”

Caleb was unsure, but as she continued to walk off, he ended up following after her with a tired sigh. At this point, he was just waiting for Hope to return, just like Tia was Aislinn.

However, the two ended up spending the rest of the day working together. They largely operated separately, and there was an unspoken agreement between the two of them that they wouldn't unnecessarily butt in on each other's work. Caleb was worried that Tia would take the chance to walk off while he was busy searching a particularly messy area, but thankfully it seemed like she was, at the very least, willing to wait for him to finish up before moving on. Perhaps she simply didn't want to be told off by Aislinn if she found out she walked off, but Caleb simply had no way of knowing.

In the end, they never ended up linking back, so Caleb decided to head back to his camp. He made the suggestion to Tia, who didn't respond one way or another, but since she did end up following, he guessed she didn't really have an idea of where she'd be either. It was a good thing she didn't try and fight him either, especially with the sun barely floating over the horizon.

Thankfully, his hunch was correct. There, sitting at his camp roasting fish without a care in the world were Hope and Aislinn, idly chatting by the fire. Aislinn waved casually to them as they approached, to which Tia responded with an annoyed scoff.

“You guys sure have some nerve leaving us behind like that,” Caleb grumbled as he sat down next to Hope. “Couldn't have thrown us a heads up at least?”

“Sorry about that,” Aislinn said in a tone that made it clear she was unapologetic. “I didn't want to interrupt your conversation, and it seemed like you guys were gonna take a while.”

“Yeah, sure,” Tia groaned. “In any case, I'm heading back to my own camp. Aislinn, stay as long as you like.”

Aislinn gave her a nod as she walked away. As Caleb watched her walk off, he thought about inviting her to join them, but thought better of it. Considering how she'd been acting so far, he doubted she'd even accept anyhow.

Once Tia was out of earshot, Aislinn leaned over to speak to Caleb. “Well? How was it, spending time with Tia?”

Caleb responded with a pained grimace. “She really doesn't like me. That's all I got from our time together.”

Aislinn's face fell. “That's unfortunate. I guess she's really holding a grudge.”

Caleb sighed. “I get that you did what you did so that we could learn to get along, but unfortunately, that's not how it ended up working out. Do you have any idea why she hates me so much? I know she's been difficult with others before, but I feel like she particularly has it out for me.”

Aislinn replied with a sad smile. “To be honest, she's never told me either. I can tell you what I think it might be, especially if I consider the situation.”

“I'm all ears.”

“Alright,” Aislinn sighed. “Well, you know how young Tia looks, right?”

“Yeah. Pretty hard to not notice,” Hope replied.

“Well, that's because she was young when she was converted–only sixteen years old when she volunteered. She should have been disqualified because of that, but somehow she convinced the recruiters to let her through. Maybe she faked her age, but no one really knows how she did it except her.”

“Are you saying she's temperamental because of her age? But she's been living these centuries just like everyone else.”

“Sure, but the thing is, her personality matrix is still based on the foundation of her being a sixteen-year-old girl, with all that entails. Even if she grows, she can't really mature, because her system is constantly simulating that sixteen-year-old impetuousness. She can do her best, but at the end of the day, it does make her seem a little immature. Because of that, the others can't help but treat her like a child, and that sets her temper off.”

“That's rich of you to say,” Hope said wryly, “considering that stunt you pulled today.”

“You think so? I think of it as me trying not to baby her,” Aislinn smiled sheepishly. “To be honest, I used to have a little sister just like her, so it's hard not to see her like one.”

“In any case, what does that have to do with me? I don't think I've ever done anything like that to her.”

“Well, I'm explaining all this to explain that Tia has always been sort of loner. But she doesn't want to be. She's a sweet girl underneath it all, but in the past she didn't show it often. Still, there were two people in her past that really changed her.”

“Really? She was worse before?”

“Yep. Couldn't last with a partner more than a handful of years back then. The moment it was possible to transfer, she'd be left in the dust just like that. She put on a brave face, of course, but it definitely had an effect on her.

“Eventually, Computer decided that Tia needed an intervention of sorts, so he decided to partner her up with two partners this time around, hoping that a third person might be able to mediate better when things got bad. The two of them were much more understanding and patient with her than her previous partners, and because of that she was able to let her guard down. They probably only worked together for a few years, but those years changed her greatly.”

“Are you saying that she got better after those few years?” Caleb asked curiously.

Aislinn nodded. “Well, that's hearsay. I wasn't working with her back then, and it would honestly be another hundred years before we would link up at all. However, Tia was infamous enough that even a change in her demeanor was newsworthy to the other remainers. If that incident hadn't happened, I'm sure she would still be the same today.”

That statement piqued Caleb's interest. “What do you mean? Something happened?”

“It was a while back. Those two remainers got caught up in an accident while exploring a hidden nuclear facility. Their bodies were completely destroyed, and they had to be completely rebuilt.”

Hope was shocked by the story, but to Caleb, it was a tale that was all too familiar. So familiar that it nearly stunned him into silence.

“W-Wait a minute, Aislinn. Those two remainers... they couldn't have been...”

Aislinn soberly nodded in response. “That's right. Your 'parents' Kyle and Ella, so to speak. Sorry, but you're a fairly popular subject among the remainers, you know. So when all that happened, pretty much everyone got to know about it.”

That was a fact Caleb was fully aware of. Whenever he was partnered up with someone before meeting Hope, they always looked at him with pity, something he couldn't stand. If everyone was aware of what happened, then that made Tia's hatred make at least a little bit of sense.

“So she blames me for the incident, does she?” Caleb sighed. “I guess I can't be surprised by that.”

“I don't understand,” Hope cut in. “Why should Tia be mad at you for that?”

“From what I can tell, she thinks it's my fault that Kyle and Ella got destroyed. It may not make the most sense, but I sort of expected there to be someone who thought that way, especially if they were close to them.”

“But they were restored, weren't they? There's not much meaning in holding a grudge when the people in question are just fine, right?”

Caleb and Aislinn fell silent in response. “Hope, there's sort of a misunderstanding there,” Aislinn explained. “It's true that Kyle and Ella have already been rebuilt and restored from their backups, but that doesn't mean that they're 'back,' so to speak.”

“How do you mean?”

“Well, take a look at Caleb. Imagine if you pulled out all of his guts and entrails, then tried to put it all back in. Even if you fixed him up perfectly, he still wouldn't be the same as he was before, right?”

“I don't appreciate being made into such a gruesome example,” Caleb said wryly.

“Sorry. But I needed to make my point. See, when remainers are rebuilt, they start with the base personality and memories initially installed in the system when they were first converted. Then, the memories that they've backed up over the years are loaded in once the rebuilding is complete. On paper, that sounds as if the remainer has essentially come back to life, so to speak.”

“Are you saying that's not the case?” Hope asked curiously.

“Think about it this way. Imagine if there were memories of yours locked away somewhere that you were completely unaware of. If you watched a videotape of those missing memories, do you think that would change you much?”

Hope thought to herself for a bit. “Not really, I suppose,” she eventually answered.

“Right? That's what memory backups are like. You're essentially shown a video feed of everything you experienced. Our remainer brains being the way they are, even one showing will be enough to give you a good idea of the person you used to be and the things that you experienced. However, that's nothing like living through those moments yourself.”

Hope furrowed her brow as she tried to wrap her head around what Aislinn was telling her. However, Caleb seemed to understand exactly what she was getting at. At the same time, he had a sinking feeling that there was a detail that Aislinn hadn't yet disclosed.

“Aislinn. Forgive me if I'm being too forward, but considering how much you seem to know about all this, it makes me think...”

Aislinn smiled sadly. “Looks like you figured it out. Yes, I was destroyed once... so far beyond repair that I needed to be rebuilt completely.”