Louder Than Words

Time passed.

The days turned into weeks, and the weeks into months. Just as we had promised that evening, we had kept in contact. Mom visited whenever she could, and we spent days together as a family. It was only meals at a local restaurant, or trips to the park, but we could tell that she was trying to make the effort, and that's what counted.

Time continued to pass, and before we knew it, Spring had crept up on us. Hikari had become frequently busier lately. Most of her free time was now spent studying in preparation for her entrance exams. She had decided to try for the same highschool as me.

The school year was coming to an end, and graduation day for the third-year students was just around the corner. In other words, it was the last day that Inaba would still be a fellow student at Yumeji High.

When we arrived at school, we were all ushered into the gym. We sat there in silence as we all listened intently to the various speeches presented by the principal and the student council president. Once they were done, everyone's attention was on the third-years. One by one, each of them were called up onto the stage. They each bowed as they were handed their diplomas. A few of them even burst into tears as they left the stage, unable to hold back their emotions any longer.

Eventually, Inaba Miyu was called up. Inaba accepted her diploma from the principal gratefully. Before returning to her seat, she glanced in Shinohara's direction, who had been clapping and cheering for her the loudest.

Once the last of the third-years had been called onto the stage, the ceremony concluded with everyone singing the school anthem. Afterwards, the students all stood up and we began departing the gym. Shinohara caught up with Ayane and me, throwing his arms around our shoulders.

“Don't forget, we were all gonna meet up in the clubroom after this,” he chanted.

The three of us headed up the stairs and through the hallway until we reached the clubroom. We were the first to arrive, so we sat around the table chatting as we waited. It turned out we didn't need to wait all that long for Inaba and Iwasaki to appear. Iwasaki joined us over by the table, and we all stood up and began cheering.

“Congratulations, senpai!”

“Thanks, guys,” Inaba chuckled, wiping away a tear, “so…I guess this is it then, huh?”

Inaba took one last lap around the light music club room, trying to commit every last detail to memory.

“This'll be the last time we all stand together in this room,” Iwasaki said, unable to mask the sadness in her voice.

But then Shinohara interjected, “yeah, it is. But what a great time it's been, right?”

“For once I actually agree with you,” Ayane laughed, “we've all formed a lot of memories within this room. Wherever we all end up from here on, that's not going to change.”

“Yeah,” Inaba smiled wistfully.

She had looped back around by now, and stopped close to the door. She looked around at each of us, now lined up before her.

“This was a big part of my life, and I'm sad to say goodbye to it, but I'm also a little excited for what comes next.”

“Did you decide where you want to go?”

Inaba nodded, “I’m going to be working at my family’s inn. It’s been the plan for a while, and I think it’s the right move for me. Auntie always needs more help running it, and I can gain some valuable experience while I'm there. One day…I'd like to open my own place, a café or something…”

Inaba trailed off bashfully.

“I know you can do it, if you put your mind to it!” Shinohara said, throwing his arm around her shoulder, which only caused Inaba to blush even harder.

“Ahem, a-anyway. There is one last thing before I go.”

We all cocked our heads to the side in unison, curious as to what she had to say.

“I need to announce my successor, the next club president…and I can't think of anyone better suited than Iwasaki Chizuru.”

“Huh?” Iwasaki blinked, her eyes darting back and forth between us in confusion.

“Congratulations, president!” We all began clapping.

Inaba stepped forward and pulled her into a hug, “I'm leaving the club in your good hands.”

“Mmm,” Iwasaki nodded tearfully, “I'll make you proud.”

“I know you will.”

After they had separated, Inaba turned her attention to Shionhara.

“As for you, Ryuji,” she mumbled, bashfully, “…I believe you promised to take me out somewhere today?”

“Yes, ma'am!”

He beamed as he sauntered along after her, and the pair left the room together.

“Take care, okay?” Inaba called out before closing the door.

The rest of us followed suit and also left shortly afterwards. Iwasaki was the last out. Her hand lingered on the handle of the door. It was hers now. Her responsibility. She wondered if she would be able to live up to her friend's expectations.

"But I'll do my best," she whispered to herself, and gently pulled the door shut.

Iwasaki gleefully spun around to Ayane and me.

“I guess it's time to head out then.”

“Yeah,” I nodded.

“We'll all be third years from now on, huh?” Ayane pondered.

“It still feels strange, but I'm looking forward to it.”

“Same here. I guess we'll be the ones people will look up to now. We'll have to work harder not to disappoint,” Iwasaki said, her eyes gleaming with determination, “well, I'll see you both later then.”

With one last wave, Iwasaki turned and disappeared down the hallway, her steps a little lighter than before.

And soon, it was just Ayane and myself left. I'd thought we'd both be heading out too, but instead she had remained where she was. I recognised that sheepish look on her face. It told me that she had something else she wanted to say.

“Could you come with me for a bit?”

“You don't even need to ask.”

“Great!”

She took me by the hand, and led me down through the school's corridors. It didn't take me long to realise where she was taking me.

The library was already empty when we arrived. I guess there wasn't much need for any students to study, seeing as it was the last day of the semester. Even though there was no one around to see us, we still made our way over to the table hidden behind the bookshelves anyway. We took our usual seats, and Ayane bent down, rummaging through her bag. When she popped back up into view, she was holding onto a book.

“Here,” she said, handing it to me, “I picked it up the other day. It's an anthology collection written by a bunch of upcoming authors.”

“Huh cool, any good ones?”

I took the book from her and casually flipped through the pages.

“Yeah, a few. You should check out the third from the end sometime, I think you'd like that one.”

Curious, I flipped back to the contents page and skimmed my eyes down to the one she had mentioned. I read the title, and then read it again. I couldn't quite make sense of what I was seeing printed on the page.

‘Louder Than Words’ by Tachibana Ren.

“I…I don't understand,” I said, looking up at Ayane, “what is this?”

“It's exactly what it looks like,” she smiled, “a short story written by a talented writer. It's someone I've had my eye on for a while too.”

Ayane's face had begun to flush red while I sat there in stunned silence, still staring at the book in front of me.

“I wanted you to see what I see. You have so much potential, but you're always saying that you're not good enough. But if it wasn't for your stories, we might not even have met or became so close. When I hear you say that they mean nothing to you… it hurts.”

I stared at her, my heart sinking. Her words hit harder than I expected. I had never stopped to consider how much my self-doubt had affected her as well.

“I-I'm sorry. I had no idea that…” I trailed off.

At that, Ayane reached across the table and took hold of my hand.

“I know it's hard for you to see it, but you are more than good enough. The evidence is right there in front of you.”

I looked back down at the book on the table, at my name printed on the page.

“How did you even…?”

She chuckled bashfully, “you weren't the only one who stayed in contact with Kawaguchi-sensei, you know?”

Ah, of course. I should have known.

“We exchanged numbers back at the inn that day,” she continued, “we've spoken a couple of times since, mostly about you.”

I shifted uncomfortably in my seat. The idea that the pair of them had been talking about me in secret made me feel a little uneasy.

“We got to talking about the lack of confidence you have in your writing and she asked me to send her a copy of one of your stories. So… I sent her the one you wrote for me.”

“So…she helped you get this published?” I asked, my voice a little shaky.

Ayane nodded, “she knows people in the publishing world, people that are on the lookout for new talent.”

“And… they liked it?”

“They didn't just like it. They thought it was good enough to be published as part of this anthology. I told you, Ren, you’re better than you give yourself credit for.”

I stared down at the book again, my fingers tracing over my name on the page. It still didn't feel real. I had spent so long convincing myself that my stories weren’t good enough, that no one would ever want to read them. Yet here was the undeniable proof, staring me right in the face. I couldn't quite put what I was feeling into words. People out there, people I didn't even know, would be picking up this very same book and reading a story that I, myself, had written. I was scared of how people would react, whether they'd hate it, or criticise it, but there was another part of me, a small part, that was steadily growing inside me too.

Was it…pride?

Before I had even noticed, my eyes had filled with tears. I found it increasingly harder to breath, until I was gasping for air. The tears were rolling down my cheeks, hitting the corners of my mouth that had stretched out into a grin. A strange, shaky sound escaped my lips. I could no longer tell whether it was a laugh or a cry.

“A-are you okay, Ren?” Ayane cried out in concern as she rose from her chair.

She scurried around to my side of the table and enveloped me in a tight, reassuring hug. I wrapped my arms around her in response. I let out a small breath, feeling the knot in my chest start to loosen.

“Ayane, I..I love you,”  I managed to whisper, my voice muffled against her shoulder, “thank you, for believing in me.”

“Always,” she whispered back.