Chapter 10 - They Believe Me

I was dreaming. It was a familiar and sorrowful sight. Not the zombie filled nightmares where I saw people getting ripped apart. I was at a funeral; Rina’s father. Now that I think about it, this was around the time Rina started to change. She lost her mother at child birth so she never met her, I guess that’s why she always looked up to my mother.

She really was the perfect mother to Rina, even more so after her father died. Rina was seventeen at the time, her father had died in a hit and run accident. I remember Rina running to my house and crying her eyes out. I was surprised and scared, she kept crying and wouldn’t tell me what happened for a while.

Her father’s funeral was big. Desmond Rosenberg was a renowned scientist throughout all the districts. He had as many friends as he did enemies, but he was a good man. I used to envy Rina, she had the perfect parent who loved her and was willing to do anything for her. Meanwhile, I was stuck with a mother who’s love I tried to earn but would never be able to. My mother loved her and her father loved her.

I watched the dream play out before me; it seems like even in normal dreams I would be an observer. Rina cried over her father’s coffin, begging him not to go and apologizing for being a troublemaker. I sat beside her and comforted her as I cried as well. Many people had come to give her their condolences, some even tried to take advantage of her.

A few days after the funeral Rina had distanced herself from me. When I found the courage to confront her, she apologized. The very next day she visited my house and talked to my mom about any and everything. I figured it was because she had just lost her father and needed the comfort of someone who she always saw as a mother. The next day she visited it was the same thing, then the next, and the next. My best friend had won my mother’s love.

I was rarely involved in their conversations and anytime I had a disagreement with mother, Rina would take her side. Around that same time, I lost all confidence in myself and became even more meek than before. My best friend had gotten the one thing I always wanted.

When mother chased me out of her house Rina defended her. I went from being meek to depressed and constantly lost jobs. Before her father died Rina and I were inseparable, we had grand dreams and would always support each other, now that all seems like an illusion.

‘Then why were you desperate to find her?’

The End was here too, watching the funeral procession.

“Because she’s the only family I have left,” I said as I watched my younger self.

‘Even though she stole your mother’s love?’

“She couldn’t steal what I never had,” I said.

I’m not sure why she was asking this when she knew the answer. The End knew me better than myself.

‘If you had looked around you a bit more, you’d have found people who loved you.’

I didn’t say anything. She was right. I was always a sociable person despite being shy. Maybe I could’ve had more people who would’ve stayed by my side at this time. But I didn’t, I kept everyone at a distance as I tried to be the perfect daughter for mother.

‘It’s not too late.’

Her words echoed as everything faded. I was waking up. It was strange how I easily accepted something like this. Even learning who Demi was didn’t surprise as much as it should’ve.

I slowly blinked open my eyes.

“She’s awake!” I heard a familiar voice shout.

“Don’t shout you idiot. I have eyes, I can see that,” came another familiar voice.

As I came to, I looked at them. I was in an infirmary and Demi and Lia were beside me.

“How do you feel? You’ve been asleep for two days, it a good thing one of men upstairs was a doctor,” Demi explained.

“Two days?” My voice came out groggily and Lia handed me a glass of water.

“You collapsed in the break room. Do you know how surprised I was? You wouldn’t wake up no matter what and when the doctor checked you, he couldn’t find anything wrong…Does this normally happen?” Lia rambled.

“That was the first time,” I paused before asking, “Why?”

She gave me a confused look, “Why what?”

“Why did you help me? Why are you worried about me?” I was suspicious.

I was a wanted person but she approached me and extended a helping hand. Now she was showing concern for me. Then again, maybe I’m the strange one. Being concerned about someone who collapsed and was out for two days is normal, but I’m not used to it. I was on my own for eight years after all.

Demi gave me a look of concern while Lia explained, “It looks like you don’t remember….we met in high school. I was a loner and was going through a lot at the time but you helped me out. It meant a lot to me. When those zombies appeared and you were suddenly wanted, I tried looking for you. I wanted to repay you before it was too late…”

“What if it’s true? Would you still want to repay me?” I asked her. She was about to respond when I cut her off, “What if I told you I dreamt about everything that happened so far?! That there’s a look alike of me that calls herself The End and helps me! Every time I close my eyes, I see people dying, when my eyes are open, I have to kill to survive but yet….! Yet no one believes me! Why goddamit?!”

Tears escaped my eyes and I gritted my teeth. Maybe it’s because of that dream that I’m feeling this way. I thought that I no longer had to care about people who didn’t believe me but seeing that dream made me feel pathetic. Just when I finally decided to stop being a coward, I suddenly feel….lonely. Rina’s words rang in my mind as I recalled her anger filled look.

“If it’s true I’ll help you,” Lia said breaking me out of my thoughts and catching me off-guard. “And I believe you. I told you I wanted to repay you right? If you’re the cause of this I’ll help you. If you dreamt of this, I’ll believe you.”

“I told you before to make me believe you, and I do. At first, I did suspect you but after everything I believed you,” Demi said as he gave me a gentle smile.

“See, you have two people who believe you. Now stop being mopey,” Lia smiled.

I looked at them in surprise and before I knew it, I had lunged at the two of them. I hugged them tightly as we fell to the floor and cried my eyes out. They believe me!

After a few minutes I stopped crying and Lia spoke, “By the way, I may or may not have cursed out your friend.”

“What?” I asked in confusion.

“Demi and I heard your argument and after you collapsed I kind of cursed her out,” she laughed nervously.

“I’ll go talk to her later. But what’re you going to do from now on?” I asked her.

“I’m coming with you obviously,” she stated.

I let out a confused noise and tried to reason with her, “Lia, I’m glad you believe me but you can’t come it’s too dangerous.”

“You already have two people with you, what’s one more,” she smiled.

“That’s different, we all have our reasons for teaming up and going to D1,” I reasoned again.

My words fell on deaf ears, “I have to go to D1 too. My new friend May is going there and I need to be her moral support.”

I looked at Demi for help, he sighed “Go look for Rina, we need to know how her authorization is coming along. I’ll deal with short stuff over there.”

Lia cursed at him and I snuck out as they started arguing.

It didn’t take me long to find Rina. She was standing on the balcony looking at the few zombies roaming around.

“Hey,” I said.

She didn’t turn to face me or say anything so I went to stand beside her.

“You’re awake,” she said without looking at me.

“Yeah,” I nodded.

There was an awkward silence between us. I was waiting for her to say something but when she didn’t, I tried, “I heard Lia told you off. Don’t be too angry at her, she was just worried about me.”

“Yeah,” she responded.

Before another awkward silence could surface, I tried again, “While I was asleep, I had a dream. It made me miss being a child. Do you remember when we were children we promised that we’d be each other’s bridesmaid?”

“We’re not children anymore May,” she said coldly, “Those silly promises don’t mean anything anymore.”

I froze, mustering up the courage to plaster a smile on my face, “Is it because of our disagreement two days ago?”

“We’re different people, you can’t expect us to have the same views on stuff. But I respect your decision, with you being you it probably wasn’t an easy one,” her tone was still cold and not once did she look at me. “You were justifying your actions. It’s how you chose to take responsibility,” she had a strange expression on her face as she said this.

I didn’t get a chance to say anything. After saying what she wanted she walked away. I’m not sure what I was expecting when I came to speak to her, but it wasn’t this.

I let out a sigh, “I should’ve just asked her about the authorization…”