The Punishment Will Be… Babysitting?

In a typical cop-and-robber scenario, the police would always throw bad guys behind bars at the end of the day. Safe to say, I ended up in a similar predicament.

Except, I didn’t anticipate that my “prison cell” would turn out to be… the detective’s apartment? Not only that…

“Hey, hey, mister, what’s your name?” the boy asked, observing me closely. “I’m Noah! Nice to meet you! Your eyes look sooo cool! You’re an android, right? Who made you? You look like you came straight out of an action movie!”

My “cellmate” was, in fact, more infuriating than I imagined.

It turned out Axel had always planned to hire a babysitter for this brat who wasn’t related to him in the slightest, but out of all people, he forced the brutal mercenary to watch over him. Was he even working in law enforcement? What was that guy thinking?!

I groaned and cupped my ears. “Shut up and leave me alone,” I grumbled, curling up on a sofa.

“Aww, come on. I got grounded too!” Noah pouted and folded his arms. “Mister Holton said I’m not allowed to join his investigations anymore.”

“Gee, I wonder why. You’re talking to the guy who almost melted your head off last night.”

He swayed his shoulders. “Yeah, I know.”

…How is this kid so casual about it? I raised a brow at the boy, who still returned that innocent and curious stare.

“I was really scared at first, but then I saw you fighting!” Eyes sparkling with enthusiasm, he swung his fists around. “You were sooo awesome! You were all like—bam! Pow! Boom!”

I squinted. “No wonder you’re locked up too. Kids like you shouldn’t be seeing that.”

“I’m not a kid! I can handle it!”

“How old are you?”

“...Nine?”

“You’re a brat.”

“No, I’m not!” He stomped his feet and pouted. “I can be mature too!”

I rolled my eyes and shifted away from him. “Whatever you say. Just leave me alone.”

“Ehh? But can we be friends? I’ve always wanted a super cool older brother like you!”

“Ew. No. Go away.”

Noah clasped his hands together. “Can I at least know your name?” he pleaded.

“Don’t try to warm up to me,” I muttered. “This collar is the only thing preventing me from burning this place down.”

Unexpectedly, the boy turned pale, that gleam in his eyes dulling by the second. He slumped his shoulders, trembled, and nodded. “R-Right,” he squeaked, stepping back. “Sorry for bothering you…”

For some reason, the tone of his voice pricked something inside me, prompting me to glance over my shoulders and meet his anxious, watery gaze.

That face… It was the same expression I’d often see in a mirror. For a child to look like that somehow stung me again.

I sighed in resignation and mumbled, “Radio.”

The boy snapped out of his daze. “Eh?”

“The name’s Radio Jam.”

Noah gradually perked up and beamed again. “That’s a cool name!” he chirped. “Nice to meet you too, Radio!”

I grunted and shooed him away with a hand. “Go play your video games or whatever. Just leave me alone.”

He tilted his head. “What about you? You’re just going to sit there the whole time?”

“Mhm.”

“Uh, okay.” He pointed toward the kitchen. “There’s a battery station over there if you need to recharge.”

On perfect cue, my stomach growled.

I blinked. “H-How did you know…?”

He blinked back. “Wait, why did your stomach growl? I thought androids only need battery power.”

I clicked my tongue. “My creator built me using materials derived from biological matter in hopes that they would reduce carbon footprint, so I still have to eat something organic.”

“Really? Are all androids built like that too?”

“No, I’m a different case. Don’t ask me why—I don’t know either. I don’t even know my creator’s name.”

“Oh, really? That’s… kind of sad.”

I raised a brow. “Why would you care?”

The boy twiddled his thumbs. “I mean… parents are the reason we exist, y’know? It's sad not knowing who brought you to life.”

My face softened up as I registered his words before I brushed them aside and stood up with a grunt. “Androids are different,” I said coldly. “Unlike you humans, bonding with our creators is unnecessary.”

Noah scratched his head. “That sounds… unfair.”

“Unfair, huh?” I murmured, striding away. “I’m used to it.”

The boy gave me a concerned look before his attention shifted toward a gaming console beeping on a table. He eagerly snatched it and threw himself on the sofa, opening up a hologram and finally playing his games.

With a sigh of relief, I inspected the kitchen and checked out the fridge. It wasn’t surprising to discover pre-cooked, packaged meals, but the fact that there weren’t any raw ingredients was a little concerning.

Because of this stupid collar forcing me to stay close to either of my captors, I couldn’t simply go out and get groceries. I could escape with this brat, but now that Axel had removed my camera, I wouldn’t know his whereabouts anymore. I was better off biding my time and figuring out how to get rid of this collar safely.

For now, I suppose I should appreciate that my creator granted me some cooking skills.

Taking off my jacket and rolling my sleeves up, I pulled out a prepackaged meal and started to work.

⫿⫼⟁⫼⫿

Noah giggled and fidgeted his legs as he played around with the joysticks. “Yay, we’ve beat the boss!” he chirped. “Thanks for helping!”

“No problem,” said a player roleplaying as a young cat girl, yet their voice resembled an older man. “Say, how old are you?”

“Nine.”

“Wow, nine? You act much older than that.”

“At least someone gets it! My babysitter keeps calling me a brat and won’t play with me.”

“Wow, he sounds mean.”

“Right?”

“Is he around right now?”

The boy glanced over his shoulder and watched me casually cook across the room. “No, he’s busy.”

“I see. If it were me, I’d play with you all day. I can be a way better babysitter.”

“That does sound nice…”

“Right? You trust me, don’t you?”

“Mm, yeah, you’ve helped me beat that boss. So, I trust you.”

“I’m glad to hear that. So, where do you live?”

“Huh?”

“If you live nearby, I can pick you up and show you some cool video games. I bet you’ll love them.”

“Really? But we barely met not that long ago…”

“We’ve been getting along pretty quick, haven't we? I’m sure it's because you’re special.”

“Really?” The boy scratched his head.

“So, where do you live?”

“Uh, I think I need to ask my babysitter first…”

“No, no. My offer is special, so it has to be a secret.”

“Really? O-Okay…”

“So where—”

The hologram abruptly distorted.

“Huh?” Noah tapped on the screen.

“Noah,” I called out. “I’ve cooked too much food. Want some?”

He glanced at me and back at the hologram. “But…”

“Come eat, or I’ll throw it away.”

“Umm… I guess I’m a little hungry.” The boy reluctantly set aside his console and approached the kitchen counter, and when he laid eyes on the chicken pasta dish, he gaped them wide open. “Woah! You made all this?!”

“I’m an android. We’re all programmed to perform basic tasks.”

The boy eagerly climbed on the stool and began munching away. “Wow, this tastes good!”

“Eat as much as you want then.” I walked past him, my eyes locked onto his console. Discreetly, I inserted a wire into it and opened a minimized screen.

‘Sry abt that,’ I typed into the chat, ‘my babysitter almost caught me lol.’

‘Oh ic,’ the player replied.

‘Here’s my place.’ I copied and pasted a certain address.

There was a brief pause.

‘***? That's the police station.’

Hah, even with the in-game chat filtering system, I knew what he typed. Anyway...

‘That’s where you’ll end up in 20 minutes,’ I texted, opening another holographic tab. ‘I’m sending them your location and all your disgusting files as we chat.’

‘??? WHAT THE ****?!’

‘Also, say goodbye to your account. I’m deleting it too. Have fun in jail.’

I promptly blocked the player and turned off the game. Wearily exhaling, I threw a glare at the gullible brat behind me.

No wonder the detective made me his babysitter. When monsters disguised themselves as normal people, only another villain like me could identify them before they struck.

I wasn't exactly sure why I'd care enough to look after a random kid, but the thought of Noah going through hell because of his naivety somehow made my circuits overheat. I went there once and could still remember how those screams drove me mad. 

I could condone murder and theft, but corrupting innocent lives would cross the line.

...What a shame I was confined here. I’d love to blow up that bastard's house otherwise. A real, damn shame.