Trinity

After venting his anger, the boy storms out of the living room, leaving the oppressive tension in the room.

I remain motionless, my arms still crossed over my chest. My heart is pounding. My breath is rapid and shallow, with a slight tremor. I try to calm down, but the lump in my throat doesn't seem to dissolve. The room is quieter than I can bear, yet I dare not break it.

Pierrot is still there, standing in front of me. Without saying anything. I wonder what it's thinking. Maybe it's processing what just happened?

A few minutes pass. Then, the sound of footsteps approaches again. I stiffen, tightening my grip even more.

As soon as the boy re-enters, I turn just enough to look at him out of the corner of my eye. His face is less flushed than before, but his gaze is hard. He doesn't look directly at me.

«Follow me.» His voice is calmer. I nod weakly and follow him. My feet barely lift off the floor.

We cross the corridor and enter a room with a double bed. It's not very spacious. It's tidy, much more so than the living room.

He walks over to a large wardrobe and opens two doors.

«Try these on.» He takes out some clothes and puts them on the bed. «I used to wear these when I was about 12. They should fit you. The neons are blue… You know, it used to be my favorite color…» His tone seems to have softened. He points to my head with a slight forced smile. «It suits you well. At least it will match the color of your hair.»

I look at him confused. I don't understand what his intentions are.

After a moment of awkward silence, he returns to the wardrobe and takes another garment. «While this is the pajamas for sleeping.»

He walks towards the door with a tired air without waiting for a reply.

Before leaving, he stops at the doorway and adds «You'll sleep here. I'll be in the living room.»

I don't have time to say anything before he's already left the room, closing the door behind him.

I look at the closed door for a moment, hesitating. The idea of taking off what I'm wearing makes me uncomfortable, even though I know no one will come in. I take a deep breath and convince myself that I have to do it...

The bed attracts me, soft and inviting, but I can't relax. I sit on the edge, my hands clasped together, staring at the floor. I hear footsteps approaching. They stop at the door, followed by a knock. «Can I come in?»

Ah, it's Pierrot.

«Y-Yes…»

The door opens slowly. Pierrot enters, closing the door behind it. It sits down a short distance from me. I wonder if it doesn't want to invade my space?

It sits with its face forward.

«You don't have to be afraid of him.» it says in a gentle and reassuring voice. «Dango is... complicated. He gets angry easily, but he's not mean»

So the boy's name is Dango... I don't know what to say. My breath starts to get heavy again. It turns to me, looking me straight in the eye.

«I'm sorry about what happened. It's my fault. I shouldn't have made such an important decision without talking to him first.»

I look down, squeezing my hands tighter. «Y-You don't have to blame yourself...»

It tilts its head. «And how would it be your fault?»

«Uh, that's, I.» I freeze, unable to find the words.

«Don't worry. Now get some rest.»

I nod. Pierrot gets up and walks towards the door. It hesitates for a moment, before leaving the room.

Left alone, I crawl under the covers. It's so soft!... A real bed... Tiredness envelops me like a heavy blanket, but the whirlwind of thoughts prevents me from falling asleep immediately.

I wonder if I really don't have to be afraid of Dango. And will this new life really be better?

My stomach growls. I'm hungry, but I don't want to disturb them.

For a moment, I forget everything. Sleep takes me. I feel cradled, safe, as I haven't been for a long time.

***

The following morning, a voice wakes me. I stretch, relaxed as never before. I can't remember the last time I felt this way. I get out of bed without making a noise.

I don't know if I'm allowed to leave the room. The idea of being disobedient holds me back for a moment. But maybe they need me, or they expect me to introduce myself. I can't be useless.

I cautiously open the door, trying not to make a noise. A voice comes from the living room. «Listen, last night I realized I hadn't given you a chance to speak...»

It's Dango. His voice is still tense, but not as explosive as last night. I approach and stop just before reaching the door.

«Explain better. Why did you buy a mutant?»

«She's here to help.» Pierrot replies calmly.

Help? I clasp my hands in front of me, biting my lip. I don't know why, but that word makes me feel even more insecure.

«And that's as far as I've gotten.» From the still tense tone, it seems his anger hasn't passed yet. «You bought her because you wanted to solve the economic problems you thought existed, etc. But now we'll have to feed her too. You can't adopt a dog, a purebred one at that, and expect it to be an action figure.»

«I don't understand the comparison.»

«Did you pay a higher than normal amount for her or not?»

«No, it was normal for being on the twenty-fifth shelf.»

«Twenty-fifth out of how many?»

«Out of thirty-five.»

They stop talking. What are they doing?

«But I didn't buy her uselessly.» Pierrot continues.

«Then explain yourself.»

«I bought her to save as much as possible on food. Now we just need to buy a couple of things and that's it.»

There's another moment of silence. In the end, Dango sighs. I can't tell from here if he did it out of tiredness or resignation. «… Does it have something to do with her mutations?»

«Exactly! She's able to reproduce certain types of food.»

Reproduce... food? I put my hands over my mouth to stop any sound. My breath stops. A drop of sweat runs down my temple. Does it mean... those things?

«Damn... I don't want to know how she does it.» Dango replies, almost with disgust. «Are you sure it's edible?»

His tone sounds more tired than angry. Maybe he didn't sleep well. Is it my fault? I deprived him of sleep. Involuntarily, my hands clench around my mouth. I look down at the floor.

«Absolutely! And to make sure she was a pleasant company, I selected her according to specific criteria found on your computer.»

«Wait, what do you mean?» asks Dango, with a note of suspicion.

«While you were busy with your video games, I did some research. It wasn't easy, since the history was deleted.»

«But I don't delete the history... Noooo, don't tell me that!»

Pierrot continues with an almost amused tone. How can he be so relaxed? Doesn't he understand how to behave in certain situations?

«Yes! And I also remembered what the fire-eater, Fox, told me about it.»

My heart is pounding, my head is spinning.

«No, no, no, no, no.» For some reason, Dango seems upset.

«I made a profile by combining the things Fox told me with what I found: pointed ears, horns, pale skin, wavy blue hair, red eyes, a mix between North European East-Asian, si-»

«Stop it!…» Dango interrupts it and silence falls suddenly. His voice was not angry. It sounded like a mixture of embarrassment and exasperation.

I put my hands on my cheeks, I feel the heat enveloping me, it can't be true, what do all those words mean? I am me, I am details about me! A knot tightens in my stomach, those things that I thought were defects, no, monstrosities, were chosen on purpose, I can't keep my breath steady.

«Pierrot…» Dango's voice is low, almost resigned. «For now, don't stay in the room. I need to think in peace.»

Immediately after, I hear Pierrot's footsteps approaching, I shiver, I don't want him to find out that I heard them, I jump into the room and close the door behind me.

I sit on the floor leaning my back against the door.

I was chosen for... that? Tears burn my eyes, but I don't want to let them out, I mustn't cry, I don't want to cry, if I cry, I fail in my duties and it's like admitting that all this is real, that I really am like that. I pull my knees to my chest, resting my forehead on them, I can't pretend to be normal, and yet, the idea that everything about me was chosen for… for something like that… I can't even think about it, my mind is a whirlwind, I want to scream, I want to disappear, I want to be different, I feel the tears slipping, despite my efforts, I don't want to be heard, I don't want them to know how humiliated I feel.

***

A couple of hours later, Dango calls us into the living room. I leave the room with a knot in my throat. I'm still shaken. I don't know if my cheeks are still flushed with embarrassment.

Pierrot is waiting for me at the door and we head towards the living room together. It seems calm, as if nothing had happened. I wonder how he does it.

We sit on the couch against the wall. Dango is already there, sitting in his armchair. His serious gaze weighs on me. He doesn't seem angry anymore, but he's also not what I would call calm.

«First of all, I want to talk to you about how we're going to move forward from now on.» He begins, his tone calm. «Seeing as you're here now, I don't feel right sending you back to a squalid place like the store, because of our mistake.»

My heart skips a beat. I won't be going back to the store. I should feel relieved, but I can't.

«Make that clear. You'll still have to do the tasks you were assigned.»

I nod slowly, too scared to say anything.

«Pierrot, you'll be in charge of teaching her to cook and your tasks won't change. I'll be in charge of teaching you how to fight.»

I stiffen. Fight? I don't understand. I'm not strong. Why would I have to fight?

Dango observes me, as if he notices my confusion, but he doesn't stop. «We'll go to the warehouse to practice. There are various weapons there and, sometimes, Einar will come to teach us something.»

Pierrot leans forward slightly, curious. «Why do you want to teach us how to fight?»

«Because it might come in handy when I take you on animations.»

Animation? The word sounds strange, unfamiliar, but Pierrot seems to light up. It must be something nice. For me, however, it's just another unknown to fear.

«Okay. Regarding the tasks, I'm done.»

Pierrot and I stand up almost simultaneously, ready to start our chores, but Dango stops us. «Wait!… I wanted to add one more thing.»

We sit back down, exchanging a confused look. What else does he want to tell us?

«I've had time to think and... I wanted to apologize for last night. For what I said and how I behaved, to both of you.»

I remain speechless. Apologise? To me?

«You don't have to apologize.» Pierrot replies calmly.

Dango shakes his head and gives a guilty smile.  «I do. I didn't even have a chance to welcome the newcomer.»

He looks at me. His eyes are... different, soft. It makes me feel strange.

«Do you have a name?»

The question takes me by surprise. A name? My breath becomes heavier, my throat tightens. I don't know what to say. In the end, I look down and, after some hesitation, I reply «N-No.»

Dango sighs softly, leaning back in his chair and running a hand through his hair, thoughtfully.

After a long moment, he stands up. His figure towers over me and my heart races. What is he going to do?

«So…»

With a slow movement, he places a hand on my head. Gently.

The gesture catches me completely off guard. It doesn't hurt. It's not threatening. It's... warm. I don't want to be touched by him. I have to stay still. I feel strange, my face is burning even more.

«I welcome you… Beatrice.»

My lips tremble. I don't know what to say. I don't even know if I can allow myself to smile. But for a moment, a very brief moment, I feel something different.