Sushi Truck in Space

"This is where we make our first stollar for sure this time, little bro." Randy proclaimed as he threw open our ship's service window.

I took a single look around then turned to him with a baffled look on my face. "This is a Space-Mart parking lot."

He let out a chuckle. "Sure is. Space-Mart's the largest big-box store in the galaxy. Just think of all the people that come and go from here on a daily basis."

"I get that, but this is private property. We can't just set up shop here without permission."

"Of course we can! When people taste our burgers, this Space-Mart's management will be begging us to come back." He didn't seem concerned in the least, as he proceeded to fire up the grill and start frying up some beef patties.

"Alright, we need to start drawing in a crowd. Stand outside wearing this outfit and hold this sign." He held up a coat hanger with a bright red leotard and a burger shaped hat.

"Not happening." I bluntly responded.

"Aw come on, we both have to pull our weights. I'm already doing all the back breaking labor like cooking and serving the customers." He proceeded to guilt trip me.

He pressed me for a few minutes, until I finally caved. I groaned, "fine, but I'm only wearing the hat."

Immediately, he shot me down without hesitation. "No can do. That costume's a rental. We have to get our money's worth."

I continued to protest, but somehow, defying all logic, I seemingly materialized outside the ship wearing it while holding a large bright yellow arrow shaped sign that read, "Best Burger in the Galaxy!" I don't know how my brother always managed to get his way, but reality seemed to bend to his will.

I stood, wearing that goofy costume, which was slowly but surely chafing my inner thighs. The two of us waited for our first customer... And waited... And waited to no avail. Not a single person paid any mind to us. There were people entering and exiting the store, but it was like we were invisible.

"Something's not right. They should be swarming us by now." Randy scanned the area with his eyes, suspiciously.

Walking past was an alien that looked almost entirely like a dolphin with the exception of the two human-like legs sprouting from its lower half. It wore a plaid sweater vest, of which its two stubby fins poked out of the arm holes, and a pair of khaki chino pants on its legs.

Randy locked in on it. "Yo dolphin bro, you hungry?"

It let out a series of squeaking noises, but unfortunately neither of us understood dolphinese.

"I'm thinking that's a ye-."

The dolphin alien began aggressively flapping its flippers, before letting out more weird noises. It then sprayed a liquid, which was hopefully water, out of its blowhole at Randy.

"That seems like a no." I responded

The alien began walking toward the other side of the parking lot. My brother immediately noticed something peculiar. "What the duck! Why the heck is everyone going over there? With just the smell of my food alone, we should be the center of attention."

Dripping from head to toe with dolphin liquid, with his chef's apron still on, he crawled through the service window. "We got some investigating to do, little bro."

"Can I at least take this leotard off fir-."

He didn't even let me finish, as he stubbornly marched toward the commotion. I let out a sigh and followed.

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"You got to be ducking, kidding me!" Randy angrily bellowed, as a vein on his forehead throbbed.

"You're making a scene." I attempted to calm him down to no avail.

"Some ducking ducker ducking stole our ducking idea!"

Sitting before us, surrounded by a fairly significant sized crowd of patrons with money in hand, was another food truck. Unlike our rust bucket though, this one was sleek and new with state of the thruster engines, a chrome paint job, and a slide out patio for patrons to sit. On top of it was a giant 3D holographic projection of a chibi sushi roll mascot, cycling though doing a number of popular SpaceTok dances.

"Maybe we should just go somewhere else to sell. There's plenty of room in the galaxy for two food trucks." I suggested.

"Not in my galaxy there isn't. Who the heck even likes sushi? Everyone knows burgers, specifically MY burgers, are the greatest food ever to grace this universe."

"But what can we do about it? It's not like we own the concept of the food truck."

"I keep telling you this countless times over, little bro. Butts are for crapping!... You know what, I'm walking up to that window and I'm going to confront this little ditch."

Blinded by rage, he forced his way through the dense crowd, all the way up to the sushi truck's service window. There was a scrawny looking generic gray alien that was attempting to order, but Randy didn't even hesitate shoving it out of the way.

"Yo duck face, what makes you think you can-..." He paused. "It's you!"

I waded my way through the crowd, slightly afraid my brother was about to do something that could get him arrested. As I finally reached him, I was surprised by the person who was running the rival food truck...

"You're the trench coat guy from the antique shop!" Randy accusingly pointed at him.

"Oh, you two." The trench coat guy calmly responded. "I should thank the two of you. Because of that Simple-Cook Oven I received from our trade, I was able to perfect my Space California roll."

Randy took a passive aggressive tone. "You know this is private property, right?"

"The store gave me permission to be here." He casually rebuttaled.

"Yeah, well... Uh... How good can your food actually be?" Randy was desperate to find some kind of flaw with this guy's business.

The trench coat guy set out a sushi roll for each of us. "Try it for yourself."

Randy stared at the dish with a look of disgust. While he hesitated, I picked it up and began to inspect it for myself. It consisted of a piece of imitation crab, cucumber, and avocado wrapped in seaweed and rice. I wasn't much of a sushi guy, but judging from appearance, it looked fairly appetizing. I brought it up to my mouth to take a bite when...

"Don't you dare eat that slop!" Randy slapped it out of my hand onto the ground.

"What the heck was that for!?" I fumed.

"There's something up with that sushi. Just look at all these sheeple blindly lining up for this garbage. I'm telling you, that sushi is mind controlling these people!"

"It's blatantly obvious that you're jealous of my success. I'm more than happy to give you some pointers, but creating unhinged conspiracy theories to cope isn't a great look for your business." The trench coat guy defended himself.

Randy continued his tirade. "There's definitely some kind of funny business you're pulling. I have no doubt in my mind that if we were on a level playing field, my burgers would obliterate your sushi any day of the week."

"Is that a challenge, blue hair boy?" He taunted.

"Big talk from a guy who hides behind a hat and baggy jacket." Randy shot back.

"I'm so confident in my sushi, I'll take you on anytime, anywhere. You pick the location. Whoever sells the most wins."

Randy laughed. "Let's make it interesting. Loser shuts down their business forever."

"Woah, wait a sec-." I attempted to interject.

"Sure. I'll even give you time to scope out a venue in advance."

"Randy, I really think this is a bad-."

Randy put out his hand. "Done!"

The trench coat guy and he proceeded to shake on it.

"Here's my business number. Let me know when and where. I'll be there." With those final words from the trench coat guy, we started back to our ship.

I couldn't believe my brother decided to jeopardize our whole business just because he couldn't help his ego and start a beef (no pun intended) with a rival food truck. It was blatantly obvious we were completely in over our heads. Despite that, Randy seemed completely sure of himself.

“With my cooking skills, there’s no way we can lose.” He bragged.

Frustrated with him, I kicked a tire on our food truck. “Do you not understand the situation? We’re probably going to lose the business because of you!”

“Have some confidence in your big bro. I’ve gotten us this far, haven't I? He patted the side of our ship. “ If it makes you feel better, we’ll recruit a helping hand for the competition. Honestly, with all the customers I’m expecting, we’re going to need it.” He shot me a smirk. “I definitely know you won’t be complaining with who I have in mind…”