what is despair~

‘That felt good’ said Mihak and start to thank Guta for letting him use his washroom and now back to business his expression changes and ask for 800 grains for 1 bowls ex spicy noodle but guta was mute as he mind is not present there but asked what he was thinking and said ‘what is the reason we live for?’ mihak after looking at guta’s condition mumbles ‘why me?’ and after some silence said ‘you can have this bowl on me but return me with 1% interest rate per month when you have some grains’ and just left.

Guta is still out of life and don’t know what is happening around him and again fall on mat even when the room is full of aroma of noodle, he has lost his desire to live just lie in a same pose with tightly holding that piece of paper in his hand looking at the bowl of noodles and got fainted.

A soft scraping noise, followed by a gentle creak as Mihak slides open the door after inputting the unique pattern from his i2r nail which was not even installed in those doors.

With a warm family welcoming him which includes pair of 2 grandparents and his 3 brothers and his mother after giving his earn from noodle shop to his mother he fist bumps with his sibling and a flashy one with his grandparents and join them in their blanket and their talks ‘ did those crocks got you today again, you should have told them my name’

Said the gramps 1 followed by which gramps 2 said ‘your face has more bruises than there are hole in my sweater’ and start laughing ‘ that’s not what you say to your grandson you stone hearted man’ said wife of gramps 2 ‘ come here let me treat your wounds but of course in return for extra double spicy stretchy noodles from master’ said grandma of gramps 1 and everyone start laughing. Mom served the noodles, and everyone have smoke coming out of their ears but of course not our grandmas who was as cool as ever and playing consoles.

#

In the leap of someone’s shadow he is lying and that someone is politely patting on this child’s head his head and grandpa said ‘what happened child you look dead and you still same as I left you at 17’ he replied ‘Are you going to die?’ grandpa looked at him and said ‘there is no way I am dying I am still young’ and punched his head. After that while having extra spicy noodles, grandpa start telling him stories heard from his grandpa and that has been passed on of a place where there is no roof, and everyone have piece of land to live irrelevant to commoner or aristocrats. ‘Listen child there are so many advise I want to give so many Birthdays presents so many scolding, but I have to go.’ Said the grandpa with a disheartened and cracking voice.

‘Where are you going leaving me alone in this world, I am afraid don't leave me don't leave me’ the child shouted

The grandpa stands up and start walking forward but child grabs his pants and said ‘what do I do I have nothing left in me. Everything I had is gone in air’

Grandpa shouted and said barely holding his tears ‘young soilderrrrr! Look forward and keep marching even if you don’t see anything on your path but survive.’ ‘Eat well shit well and live a long life.’ The boy kept shouting and sobbing but that someone did not stop or was not able to stop.

Guta wakes up and go near the photo and say with broken down soul I have nothing in me.

He sat near the photo and began devouring the bowl of food. After finishing, he said, 'Too hot for me,' but still somehow managed to complete it with tears streaming down his face and his nose running. He quickly wiped away the tears and snot.

That day, Mihak didn't uncover much at public site, but it wasn't for lack of effort. Like everyone else on the digging site, he gave his all, working tirelessly with his life in the mouth of the tunnel. ‘I’m thinking of digging at a private site from tomorrow. It’s been hard these days, barely meeting the family’s needs,’ said a worker after the shift was over. ‘But you won’t get to keep the loot... ah, not that you’ve gotten much anyway’ his friend replied.

Mihak hurried to reach his second job site but looks like today is a normal usual day except the last delivery was to the same place as yesterday, but with five bowls this time. Doubts filled his mind as his delivery amboit approached the destination 'Why me again?' he muttered, weaving past large vehicles marked with radioactive signs on highway.

After ringing the bell multiple times without a response, Mihak was about to snap when someone finally opened the door. The person looked similar to the dead-eyed man from yesterday, but today, his mind was present today. He invited Mihak inside to thank him for the previous day with nothing but water.

‘Here are your 5 extra spicy 3x stretchy noodles, and you better pay me today. How can someone own a house and land and can’t even pay for noodles.’ Mihak said firmly.

‘I’m broke and I didn’t order these,’ the man replied shamelessly.

Mihak snapped back, ‘Then don’t order, you shameless one.’ He paused for a moment, confused. ‘Wait, what?’

After thinking for a while

Mihak sighed and offered the noodles to him and asked for repayment with 2% interest when he can payback. As he was leaving, the man called him back and handed him a medal—the Royal 1 Medallion, awarded to those who contributed the most in the first war against Sector 1.

Mihak, shocked and already calculating the profit of selling the medal but asked anyway out of shame, ‘No way, are you the Royal One? But why are you giving this to me? Doesn’t it have any value to you?’

Guta simply replied with expressionless face, "Nope, but you could earn back your loss with this scrap."

‘I will hold on to it with me for a while, but you better pay me back’ said Mihak after hesitatingly taking the medallion out of Guta’s hand covered in bandages. Sound of closing the door and Mihak leaves.

2 days later Mihak finishes his job and was lucky to get his hands on some left-out and was heading home while thinking of the taking everyone on the picnic this upcoming digging festival month and reaches the residential and open the door

As he opened the door, the orchestra intensifies before him made the worst nightmare he could not even imagine. Every member of his family—his mother, little siblings, and his crew of grands—lay headless, with the entire house painted red with blood. His hand lost its grip on the packed noodles, and he rushed to the headless bodies, grabs one which he recognized as his youngest sibling. He started to wail and cry heart-wrenchingly, his broken whispers and sobs echoing throughout the building, but no one responded, as if every soul in the building had perished.

He rushed from body to body, and as he recognized each one, his cries grew louder, tears running uncontrollably down his face, snot covering his entire face. His whole body trembled while hugging his headless grandma he muttered, "Who am I supposed to eat these with?" After grieving for more than 2 hours, the internal military finally arrived began their investigation. They revealed that the horrific massacre wasn't confined to just this house or building all three interconnected structures had faced this bloody rain from hell. Fallen to his knees and devastated by unbearable weight of a future that no longer held the family he cherished. As the internal military personnel, led by Mr. Blue—the superintendent investigator renowned for his expertise and highly regarded by the high command—began questioning Mihak, he could only respond with silence. The shock was so overwhelming that he couldn't utter a word, and tears continued to flow from his eyes. He was taken to custody and was investigated both mentally and physically and was revealed that he was not a part of the happening and is a victim and got released after few days everything returned to normal for everyone except for victims

‘We are sorry for the losses of victim’s family. We all live together in this world together despite the hardship make us a family so……...’ As the announcement broadcast through city emergency speaker in every sector Mihak keep on staring the bed where grandpa 1 was lying and said ‘you still look relaxed even when you are about to die’ and burst to cry again and mutters ‘ it is time to go work’ depressed.