I want to know you

For a fleeting moment, Mr Leafeyorb stares at me. His expression has remained the same all along. As if perfectly unaffected by my acts. Though…

     He finally lowers his head, pressing his forehead against his intertwined fingers. That makes me wonder what he may be possibly thinking when I notice his shoulders shaking. Is he cold? No, I don’t think his clothes are defective. Is he angry? Maybe I did something wrong concerning the gestures.

     A brief second is more than enough for my doubts to be swept away. Marygold Leafeyorb straightens up to lean against the back of his chair, a warm laugh escaping his lips. A laugh he tried to hold back, without success.

     As he brings the back of his hand closer to the lower part of his face, I notice a faint blush. Faint yet enough to soften further his features.

     I should definitely feel more embarrassed, but his endearing look keeps these thoughts away from me. The way he laughs… it is the same as a forest in spring. When fauna and flora awake from a woolly slumber and gradually reveal their enchanting songs, colours, perfumes. I like it.

“You really are something, Aurora.” Mr Leafeyorb grants me in a softened tone when his laughter subsides.

     The smile that has slipped on my face widens imperceptibly at those words. This is the first time he hasn’t used honorifics when addressing me.

***

Once we are on the street we hurry up, run hand in hand until we reach the corner. It is only when we are at a fair distance from the maid cafe that we slow down.

     Letting out a silent sigh, I take a look at the director and meet his gaze. Amusement glistens genuinely in his eyes.

“You should be safe now.”

     I nod gratefully to his knowing tone, my mind flashing back to a moment ago. After he finished his desert, I pretended to walk him to the entrance and this was at this occasion that he dragged me out.

     It takes him a short while before realizing he holds my hand longer than necessary.

     At the moment he releases it, turning his attention ahead, I have the feeling that he is about to let behind him what just occurred. It is vague… and I can’t explain it in any logic way… but for a brief second, I am worried.

     Hence, I quicken my pace and extend a hand to catch gently his, pressing the other against his arm.

     Marygold widens his eyes, standing still. He clearly did not expect any move from me.

“Keep me within your field of vision.” I whisper softly, walking by his side.

“Huhh?”

     To answer his astonishment, I turn a calm gaze towards his.

“That is what you said… before we left Amahara Corporation.”

     What he exactly said was for me to stay within his field of vision, though… I objectively can’t if he looks away.

     Staring at me, he half-opens his mouth before letting out a sigh. Then, he casts a softened look at me.

“You’re afraid of what else may happen? Very well, stay by my side. In any case, we’re not far away from the thoughts’ stream.”

     I nod to him, even if I don’t think we have the same things on mind.

     As we resume walking, he stays rather silent. Without words to interfere, I focus ahead. From time to time, I cast a glance at the director. He seems lost in thoughts and gazes at the leafy roofs vaguely lit by the Moon. I notice he has slowed his pace.

     What is he possibly thinking about?

***

In the days that follow, each time I see Marygold I take the opportunity to greet him. Even if it is brief – he is often occupied because of his position as a director – I don’t want to miss an opportunity to solve the mystery he is. Not that I know which opportunity I am really waiting for… But the words uttered by the woman in the garden keep intriguing me. I am not able to forget them.

    I want to ask him.

     Sitting in a rest area, I wedged myself under a bay window. My notebook leant against my knees, I trace from the tip of my pen curved symbols which meaning only I know. I created them long ago, when my parents were still alive.

     At times, I take the time to look at the landscape. From here, from the highest floors of the building, the city really does look like a forest.

“Hmm… What are you drawing? It looks like an alphabet.”

     I haven’t heard anyone arrive and immediately turn my head… coming face to face with the director who has leant over my shoulder. Our faces are close enough to surprise me and I widen my eyes.

     Seemingly amused, he observes me for a brief instant before straightening.

“Sorry. Did I scare you, Miss Andersen?”

     He hasn’t called me by my first name since the last time.

     I shake my head slightly to answer him. Then, I raise a hand from my notebook and gesture to him, bending my fingers to suggest him that he sits down.

     For a while, Mr Leafeyorb seems to hesitate. Maybe he wonders if he has enough time to indulge in my company.

“I guess I can stay for a few moments.”

     Aligning his actions with his words, he turns and sits behind me. As I cast a curious glance back, I stop when I feel him leaning against me.

     I blink several times. Seated like this, I can’t see him but I can feel his presence thanks to his warmth against my back. It is peculiar… Though not unpleasant.

     After a few moments I get an idea and turn a page in my notebook, writing down something again. But, this time, I use a more conventional alphabet. It doesn’t take me long before I hand him the notebook and the pen. I want him to understand what I have written even without our internal devices, so I used the Japanese writing system. Maybe it is what is called a whim.

     Marygold takes the notebook, and I soon can hear the pressure of the pen against the paper as he writes something in turn.

     When I retrieve the notebook, I take a look at the page with the message I wrote and the one he added.

“What you saw is indeed an alphabet. It is a secret one I have imagined.”

“Really? That’s amazing. You have an elegant handwriting. Mine is awful, I haven’t used paper for ages.”

     It makes me smile. His handwriting is indeed a bit trembling, but…

“It is okay for someone who never practices.”

     I hand him back the notebook, and remaining silent we keep on exchanging it, adding messages in turn.

“Are you pitying me, by any chance?”

“Not at all.” I pause for a moment before writing a few more words. “On the contrary. You are impressive. For having managed Amahara Corporation since you were seventeen.”

“All I did was the necessary.”

     Nothing but the sound of the tip of the pen scratching the paper from time to time, the feeling of Marygold’s warming presence.

     I hesitate for a moment before writing my next lines, handing it back to him.

“What happened to your father?”

“He died of overwork, they said it in the news at the time.”

     Of course, I already heard of that. Nonetheless, what I wish for is to see what he has to say about it.

“Is it the real, or the official version?”

     He doesn’t write back right away. It is like he wavers, turning a side glance at me.

     Finally, I hear the scratching of the pen.

“Why do you ask?”

     I approach the tip of the pen to the paper than stop. I take a while to think about it. The reason I ask… What I want… What I want is to know what meant the words I overheard the other day, but more than that…

“Because I want to know you. To better understand your world.”

     For a brief moment, I can feel that he leans his head back, his hair brushing mine. Then he writes something and gives me back the notebook, this time tapping the summit of my head with it.

“It’s not fair. What do I know about you?”

     As I consider his answer, a notification sounds and Marygold straightens up. Before I can think of an appropriate answer, he ends our exchange.

“If you’ll excuse me, I have important matters to attend.”