Failure

“Your move, Wilhelm. You could use the handicap,” Aurelia said. Wilhelm felt the blood rushing in his ears. She had never respected him, but still, Wilhelm thought that on a day like this, things would be different. That she might, for once, take him seriously. But if she didn’t? Well, it was her promotion on the line, and he was just fine letting her lose it.

Alright, deep breaths. You’ve come too far to let things end like this. Repeating this mantra, Wilhelm grasped at the controls of the exosuit that bound and protected him. Everything he saw in front of him was filtered through the lenses of a metal mask, one which reeked of fresh paint. He gripped at the familiar levers and buttons installed in his gloves, reassuring himself that none were missing. When he moved, so too did the suit. Clunkily, maybe, but the protection was worth the tedium. It was that or having a stray bullet blow your brains out.

With everything in order, Wilhelm raised his weapon against Aurelia. The academy hadn’t seen fit to give them any real ones, unsurprisingly, but they’d do the job just fine. He looked over the defanged blade they’d handed him, covered with a strange material that could “drain” the energy of the opponent’s exosuits. If he did that to a few members of the opposing team, Wilhelm could secure his spot in the Top Eight of his graduating class. Well, one enemy at a time, right?

He circled Aurelia, drawing closer with each step. She looked at his blade and laughed.

“Really? When all the chips are on the line, you’re betting on a brawl?”

“That’s what I’ve always done, and it’s gotten me this far!” Wilhelm said. He pressed the red buttons in his gloves and leaped forward. Bursts of air thrusted him forward, pushing out of his feet onto the ground below. Raising his sword over his head, he brought it down as he flew towards Aurelia, but he struck nothing but air.

Aurelia had dashed backwards, and as she moved, she pulled her dual pistols out their holsters. She trained them on Wilhelm and opened fire. Under the steel, he’d face no harm from the ammunition given to them, but each shot would drain the battery on his suit. Stuck in the air, Wilhelm pointed his feet rightward and pressed red again. He flew to the side, sliding on the earth on all fours but evading Aurelia’s bullets. But more came, and he couldn’t avoid them all before he took cover behind a nearby wall.

The battery’s still green? Not bad. I can keep going! He jumped from behind the wall and rushed towards Aurelia. As she opened fire again, he flew to the side, and while he was in the air, he pulled out a rifle of his own and fired. One, two, three, but not one of them hit the target.

Aurelia scrambled backwards, stopping to mock him. “Come on, Wilhelm! All that talk, and you’re giving in already? You know I’m a better shot than you are. Don't even try it!”

She raised her pistols again, but her target had disappeared. Wilhelm took stock of how much time he had left, and how many people he still needed to beat. In his helmet, the screen showed that the battery had fallen to yellow, no doubt due to him mashing his thrusters. Still, things were going to plan. He and Aurelia were both part of the final ten, and if he took her down, then he’d be one step away from securing a high position in the European Imperial Federation’s military. Can’t get ahead of myself, though. Time to finish the job.

Aurelia’s head weaved wildly, but she couldn’t see where Wilhelm had hidden himself. He was counting on that. He readied his rifle and took aim… and shot a faraway tree, on the opposite end of the clearing. It was only a second, but the echo of the bullet drew Aurelia’s eyes away from him. And in that moment, Wilhelm struck.

This time, he’d pressed the red and blue thrusters. Each of Wilhelm’s limbs pushed desperately against the air, forcing him to fly towards Aurelia. The land blurred, and Wilhelm turned off his palm thrusters, redrawing his blade. Aurelia heard him and turned desperately, but it was too late. Wilhelm crashed into her, knocking the pistols to the ground and pinning his opponent. With each slam from the flat of his blade, he could feel the resistance of Aurelia’s exosuit waning.

“Ha… You think you’ve won? I’ll admit, you’re good at cheap shots,” Aurelia replied.

“Call it what you want, but you’re the one who’s about to power down. I’m the one who’s gonna be in the Top Eight!” Wilhelm brought his blade down again. This’ll end it!

Suddenly, he felt an impact on his skull and in his gut. Aurelia had gotten a hold of one of her pistols during his rampage, but that didn’t explain… Then he felt another shot by his brain, and his suit went limp. He fell to the ground by Aurelia’s side, as she stumbled to her feet.

Aurelia said, “Not bad, Wilhelm. Not bad. But it’s a team game, and all I had to do was stall for time till the cavalry got here. If you want to blame someone, blame Storm.”

Wilhelm cursed. He tried to slam his fist into the ground, but the suit wouldn’t move. He initiated ejection procedures. The suit’s back collapsed inwards, leaving him an opening to stand, and he struggled to get to his feet. As Wilhelm walked away, he heard Aurelia call to him.

“Better luck next time, Wilhelm… Oh wait, there won’t be one.” A soft laugh followed. Wilhelm nearly turned around, fist trembling and nostrils flared. But then he had a thought. Why bother? None of this matters anymore. His hand relaxed

Instead, Wilhelm walked away towards the exit of the arena. Sure, his team was still in the game, but his role was over, and he wasn’t all that close to most of the members of his team. Maybe that was why none of them came to give him a hand… Ugh, whatever. It doesn’t matter.

As he neared the tunnel that led back to the Munich Exosuit Officer’s Academy, he thought of his prospects now. The board above it showed that he’d placed ninth, just out of reach of his goal. In the tunnel, he saw someone waiting for him… Someone he’d expected. When Levin saw him coming, too, they stood up, fiddling with buttons on their navy blue uniform. Their pale face contorted into a smile as Wilhelm and Levin’s eyes met, a deep blue sea matching Wilhelm’s gaze.

Levin made the first move. “Hey, Wil! Uh… You did great out there, really. Don’t beat yourself up over not making Top Eight, alright?”

Wilhelm sighed. “What do you expect me to do, Levin? You know how bad I wanted it. How badly I wanted to be in that program that the headmaster's been talking about.”

“Well, so did I! Special equipment, only for the cream of the crop… So special that they can’t even tell us about it? It’s gotta be something big.”

“Yeah. If you’d at least made it, maybe I’d be in better spirits. But now, we’ll just be common officers, instead of being among the European Imperial Federation’s best pilots.”

“Hey, we’ve still got a shot at getting justice for Berlin, don’t we?”

“Sure, just like I’ve got a shot at hitting the Berlin Wall from here,” Wilhelm said. “Look, we’re not taking down the Red Reaper in some standard-issue exosuits. That guy’s a damn monster.”

“Yeah… Yeah, he is, but it’s been ten years since then. Maybe he’s old enough for us to pull one over on him.”

Wilhelm started walking, and Levin followed. Nothing’s changed since we were kids, huh? 

Still, Wilhelm responded. “Maybe. Either way, I deserved that spot.”

“Sure, but you can’t beat yourself up over it. Maybe you'll get another-”

Wilhelm’s head turned abruptly. “Shut up, Levin! It’s easy for you to say this crap when you never expected to make it in the first place, but I did. I-”

Wilhelm stopped himself. His eyes fled Levin’s gaze, or tried to, but he couldn’t manage it. Levin’s eyes turned glassy, and before they could break, Levin walked away quickly. Wilhelm tried to say something, to make the words come out, but the only sounds he could hear were from Levin’s boots, clashing with the tunnel’s steel floor. Wilhelm thought about following after his friend, but his shaking feet wouldn’t turn. Little drops slowly fell from his face. Unable to hold them in, Wilhelm rushed back to his room, avoiding anyone on the way and crashing onto his bed. I’m… a failure, like always. Nothing’s changed. Nothing at all.