Feelings

It was a gray day.

Checkmate...

I stared at my reflection in a dismal puddle. I clung to it, hoping not to lose myself—wanting to believe that my idiotic face wouldn’t fade so easily.

My heart pounds almost as strongly as my rot.

Back again, standing before the doors of Jiguroka Hospital, I watched as pedestrians trampled over the ominous dark stains on the brick plaza, oblivious to their significance.

If I don’t do it… If I don’t risk losing myself, I won’t be able to save her…

I remembered the nightmare of my childhood. The images of my rotting hand. My cries.

The terror etched into Hikaru Tore’s face as he feared for his son’s life…

The stares of my classmates at school, their eyes fixed on that false hand, grotesquely out of proportion with the rest of my body.

Even so, I decided to cross those doors and take the plunge once more.

If it weren’t for her, I think I’d have let myself rot away to death…

…

“Mr. Tore, allow me to introduce you to Mr. Iwasa. He’s a representative from Hero Enterprise—I believe you’re already familiar with their company…”

“A pleasure.”

From my hospital bed, I raised a hand in greeting to the man in a suit. His attire matched those of the men in the outer district, but his demeanor was more subdued.

The room was peculiar, devoid of any scent beyond his cologne.

“As I mentioned, your infection will require implants in your neck, right shoulder, spinal cord, and part of your brain…”

“Yes, I’m aware.” I adjusted the loose hospital gown.

“Well, there are several options available for your procedure…”

How did a simple salesman end up in my hospital room?

“Exactly, as the doctor mentioned, I’m here on behalf of Hero Enterprise. We have this line of state-of-the-art implants designed to suit any budget.”

For Katy, Isayama. Do it for her…

“They’re called the H22s.”

I tried to picture her smile.

“They’re the safest spinal implants on the market…” he added.

“How interesting.”

“The other option would be Cellos Robotics,” interjected the aging doctor.

“Cellos it is, then.”

“But our implants are the safest…”

“It’s just that I work there. With any luck, I can count this as my own sale and pocket the commission… Nothing personal.” Weakly, I chuckled at my own joke.

“V-very well, Cellos Robotics, then,” the doctor broke the silence.

And so, clutching the sheets of my hospital bed, I crossed the threshold that would forever separate me from my most human side.

Despite my determination to save Katy, in those last moments, my thoughts drifted to that wonderful wooden instrument of keys and strings.

…

And so, Isayama Tore, an eighteen-year-old, became another young user of spinal implants.

Gradually, I felt the sunlight as it danced among the motes of dust suspended in the air.

I.

My body responded perfectly to my attempts to move it. Once I sat up, I waited a few seconds for my vision to adjust to my surroundings.

I feel good…

My gaze wandered out the window, escaping toward the blue sky framed by gaps in the clouds, accompanied only by the whisper of my own breathing.

I savored the profound silence, warmed by the heat in my neck.

Am I really me?

Not only was the fever gone, but my mind seemed like a calmer place. Too calm, maybe.

I tested my hands, and they responded perfectly. No trembling. I turned back to the sheets, ready for the ultimate test.

Concentrating, I mimicked one of my favorite piano pieces in the air, silently letting my fingers flow freely. Note by note, movement by movement.

To my surprise, the test went perfectly. Perhaps even better than it ever had before…

Despite my eagerness to leave, the doctor insisted I remain under observation for a couple more days before resuming my normal life. Over the next forty-eight hours, I underwent every possible test to ensure the implants functioned flawlessly.

…

Will Katy be okay?

Two days later, I finally stepped back into the world, passing through the mandatory antibacterial spray, as usual.

A new day—Jiguroka Hospital’s plaza buzzed with people, as expected.

“Hero Enterprise reminds you to stay cautious of S-Flu exposure. These are uncertain times. Thank you for trusting Hero Enterprise.”

The drone’s announcement echoed from the speakers above.

“Another drone outside the outer districts…”

Upon noticing me, it focused its camera. I even saw its lenses adjust, ensuring it captured me perfectly.

Amid the crowd, I was the only human it seemed to see.

A reminder that, while I had escaped the fever, it was only beginning.

Damn it…

…The race against the clock had begun.