5.5 A Group of Unstable Individuals

Two-Rabbit woke up for a few minutes. Just a few. He heard giggling. He had a daughter once. She'd been a half-beast, so her lifespan had been half as long. 'No parent should have to see their child die', they'd said, and Two-Rabbit had agreed. He'd had a family once. Things hadn't been perfect. Nothing was. But they'd been fine.

Two-Rabbit woke up again. Snail and Mish were giggling. That was good. Disrespectful, but good. They were talking about how clothes didn't fit them. One, because she was too small and her tail too fluffy. The other, because... she was too big? But weren't there clothes for giants these days? Actually, for that matter, weren't there stores specifically made for tailed individuals?

Oh, well.

Two-Rabbit woke up yet again. Akiha had tried, and failed, to walk in, stumbling at the edge of the door. He landed on the floor like a pancake. Neither Snail nor Mish awoke. Somehow, they'd found enough room to fall asleep on the same bed. That was good?

Akiha lay on the floor for a worrisome amount of time. He sighed, very slowly, very heavily, after which he stood up. Wobbling, he pancaked his way to his bed.

And that was that.

Pluie? Gone.

Cheery? Gone.

What would Two-Rabbit's family say if they saw him now, failing to rest with a group of unstable individuals who apparently wanted to save a faraway land when they themselves needed saving?

'That's so like you, dad.'

Not that.

'Are you insane?'

Better.

And to think that they were meant to recruit more... actual... warriors...

Akiha wobbled out of the room. He didn't stumble this time. Now it was back to Mish, Snail, and Two-Rabbit, and only two of them slept.

***

The plan was to sneak out before Svart and Vit awoke, but Valentine's luck was such that, right as she hopped off her bed, Vit stumbled inside. As usual, Svart read under the covers until he snored.

As Valentine cringed, Vit stared at her. She stared at Vit. And then Vit said, "All women are evil," before he went to sleep.

Valentine—

"Men are even worse."

—almost had a heart attack.

"Or not. Val, why do women hate me?"

Vit was now talking from his bed. He didn't change his clothes or anything, or shower. He was drunk. Good—one less obstacle for tomorrow. "Um, they... don't?"

"Why?"

"B-because... the... what's eight times seven?"

"Wuh..." Vit trailed off. That'd keep him busy. After doing a victory pose, Valentine took the axe next to the door, then left the room, then left the inn.

As usual, people stared at her as she walked. Why was everyone in the midlands so rude? Wait, no--locals hated being referred to as midlanders. So why did they refer to Val and the rest as southerners? Double standards much?

Val kept polishing and oiling her armor so it wouldn't creak as much, but whenever she breathed or stepped too hard it'd CREEEE! People would stare, which would cause her to breathe or step even harder. Fortunately, she could always run away.

But not today.

Why, despite her earlier actions, was she humoring the cosmic entity's plea? Bile fascination.

It was a lovely morning. In the mi—Imim desert, it seldom rained, never snowed. It was lovely. If it weren't so unbearably hot without cooling spells and its denizens weren't so rude, she'd actually consider moving. After all, no one in her homeland would miss her, anyway.

"Les épees... no... apes... epées..."

She'd taped back the letter a few minutes after ripping it. Valentine took it out of her pocket.

"Epe... e... ehm."

Whatever.

The place where the monk had told her to meet the heroes had a posh name with a lot of e's, engines, and a roof styled as a coffee cup getting spilled. Since it was right in front of the station, she'd seen it yesterday, but neither Vit nor Svart had wanted to go there because it was "too expensive". Really now? Really now...

Val walked into the coffee shop with the letter and her heart in hand. The employees leered at her, but she managed. After all, they'd just opened the shop; they probably hadn't expected customers to start harassing them until later in the day. She sat. One of them grudgingly took her order.

There was nobody else.

Yet.

Perhaps she'd been too hasty. The rest of them should show up soon. Surely.

But the letter said seven past midnight? Valentine glanced at the posh clock hanging above the counter. Well, no matter. Even Svart liked to be heroically late sometimes.

Valentine ate seven portions of a local pastry she couldn't pronounce and drank a liter and a half of coffee and it was eight past midnight and there were other customers and the employees forced a smile and the heroes still hadn't arrived. What if it'd been a prank? Surely not, right? Why would a civilization-crushing entity do that? By the hour and a half mark of tardiness, Valentine started to cry. She covered her face with the letter, but then she stained it, so then one of the employees rushed to give her handkerchiefs, not because they cared, but because she could stain the posh furniture.

She wasn't the only one they leered at, however; mystifyingly, a succubus was there as well. Valentine had seen a few of them, sure, just not during the day. They didn't frequent public places "for obvious reasons". Maybe she was lonely. Maybe Valentine could talk to her? And befriend her? And have her join Svart's group? So she wouldn't be lonely anymore.

She... which of them?

A fluffy, blue-gray beastman walked into the shop. He wore a red bandanna on his neck, and his ears were very long and pointy. Prior to her trip to Imim, Valentine had never seen beastmen, or even half-beasts. They mostly seemed to congregate around the... lands... in the middle... though they'd only recently begun to travel outside of their insular communities. Svart had told her all of this because he'd read it in a book, so it was probably true. After him walked in a half-beast, as if on cue, with a cute pastel aesthetic composed of cheap imitation garments that might've seemed authentic to a less fashion-savvy person (like Svart or Vit). And then—

Wait.

She—she knew that girl.

Oh no.

"Please," Valentine whispered. "Please don't be them oh no please please."

The next in line was the pretty boy mage that'd defeated the bandit chief.

"Nooo..."

Then Pluie, then a green giant that seemed to be in her early teens. Finally! Valentine wasn't the biggest girl in a room, for once... but at what cost... oh, no, she was starting to cry again. No. Bad. She had to stop. Of course it had to be THESE people.

The pretty mage yawned. "Won't you order anything, Two-Rabbit?" He asked the beastman. "We all know no one's going to show up. Let's just attempt to enjoy the meal please thank you."

"No," said Two-Rabbit.

"...right. That's what I thought. Pluie? Snail? Mish?" He covered the yawn with the back of his hand this time. Valentine knew Shiou people had long, pointy ears, but were they that long or that pointy? Also, she'd told herself she'd been hallucinating last time, but no... his pupils were slitted like a reptile's. He drew plenty of stares—to be fair, such a strange group did that in general—but not in a bad way like Valentine. "My treat."

Pluie either nodded or nodded off. What if he looked at Valentine? Would he recognize her? Say hi? Or look the other way? Her eyes were still puffy from crying, though. "I'll have a, um. An. Onion soup."

"Me too," said the giant. She'd need at least one pot to be remotely satisfied, but Valentine digressed. "And an extra portion for... sorry."

The pretty boy mage glared at her, but the apology almost seemed to slap off his expression. "Oh, no, don't apologize! My bad. I was just thinking about the logistics. We can order one before we leave so it stays warm for longer. How about that?"

But it was no use; the giant grimaced. "I'm sorry..."

"Stop apologizing on his behalf, sweetie," the half-beast barged in. "We went through this yesterday, remember?"

"...yeah, but..."

"But nothing! Sad faces won't attract new team members. This goes for all of you people. Cheer up! It's a bright sunny day and we're not dead yet."

What a tonally confused motivational speech.

Valentine hid her face behind the letter.

So this group was the same as the one who'd fought along her, Vit and Svart at the bandit camp. That was good. The problem was that Svart had fought the half-beast before, although... where was the other one? The swordsman with cinnamon skin? Oh, wait, no, Svart had told her to stop using food descriptors for skin color. But he was pretty similar in tone, she had to admit. Maybe a bit lighter. Anyway, he hadn't been with this group back during the bandit raid, either.

Could he possibly have left the group? Because if so, maybe Svart would say yes to them joining these people... maybe... but they'd also been talking about a missing member...

Never mind then. That was probably him. Of course, Valentine didn't actually think he was a super dangerous bandit, though it wasn't every day that she saw someone cleave a blizzard in half.

"I have a plan," the pretty boy mage told the other present members of the group. "Since these letters aren't doing shit, we're changing tactics."

"If I can talk," talked the giant, "I was thinking of maybe putting some letters at the local guild's bulletin board? I think that could help."

"Perhaps."

"What if you reworded the letter a bit?" Asked Pluie. "If it sounded more urgent, then maybe more people would join. I think. Maybe. It's just a suggestion. I'm sorry."

"Perhaps."

Two-Rabbit said, "There is a city-state we could visit."

The table fell ominously silent, so Valentine stole a glance at them. But no, it was just that the food had arrived. And they ate. So they couldn't speak.

Svart, Vit, and Valentine had come to this place because they'd been told it had amazing weaponry, and it was—amazingly overpriced. They had yet to purchase anything. Provisional weapons could only carry them for so long.

Come to think of it, where was the world-eating entity?

The giant girl was the first to finish. "While you guys finish eating, I can... no?" The rest of them shook their head. "Okay."

"Finish your meal," the ice mage told her. "I'll order an extra one for him."

For... him? The criminal from the weapon shop or the world-eater monk?

The succubus stood up. Valentine peeked at her from behind the letter. One of the employees showed up with her meal, followed her gaze, and said, "I'd be careful if I were you."

Valentine jumped. "I wasn't—"

"Not judging. They exist for a reason. Just.. be careful."

At least the letter covered her blush. But anyway, the succubus approached the group. The first to notice this was Two-Rabbit, then the half-beast, then Pluie, who looked away quickly, and finally the giant and the ice mage. Where literally everyone else grimaced, the ice mage stood up so abruptly he almost spilled the onion soups, then greeted, "Good morning!"

"Hi," said the succubus.

This was around the time the ice mage realized his outburst, so he sat down again. "Hi. Forgive me. I couldn't help but notice the letter in your hand..."

"No," said Two-Rabbit.

The ice mage shot him a look. "What do you mean, no?"

"Your services are unneeded," Two-Rabbit told the succubus.

"Two-Rabbit. Please."

"You please."

"Hey, Akiha," mumbled the half-beast, "We can't. Snail and Pluie are still children..."

"And?"

By then, the succubus was fidgeting. Obviously, she was pretty, since she was a succubus. Not too tall, not too thin, pouty lips, big red eyes, big... chest... "Got it," she said, then left.

Akiha the ice mage stood up again, spilling some of Pluie's soup this time. "Wait!"

The succubus left.

"No! No..." He covered his face with his hands. "You guys are so..."

"No," said Two-Rabbit.

Akiha stormed out of the shop. They all watched him. No one chased after him. And then Pluie said, "Sorry."

"For?" Asked Two-Rabbit.

"For... I... being young?"

"I'm sorry for being old."

Pluie bit his lip.

"I dunno," said the half-beast. "I kinda feel bad for her."

The giant girl had been toying with the tablecloth the whole while, shoulders hunched. She nodded.

"Me too," Pluie replied, "But..."

But?

Two-Rabbit told them, "Anyone under the vampire superclass is hard to work with. Not for... us. Bad things might happen." His ears twitched. "He tried to go after her, but he didn't find her."

Neither Valentine nor the succubus had any real confirmation about this bunch being the culprits behind the letters, but context was a thing. Common sense was a thing. Why else would such a bizarre group show up in this place first thing in the morning? And of course, both of them had been right.

Unfortunately, they seemed to err on the side of caution.

Akiha and Pluie would recognize her, but the problem was the half-beast... since Valentine had basically tried to kill her (not really)... but Svart had told her to do so? So it wasn't her fault?

All she needed to do was to stand up.

And talk.

Everything else could be solved later.

Just have someone to talk.

Someone to... snap Svart out of it? Put a leash on Vit?

Valentine stood up.