Chapter 16

Mona

What was wrong with me? Why couldn’t I do a single thing right? I’d had one job; to keep Athena happy, and I’d screwed it. It was all my fault that she sat crying next to me on the sofa.

Man, why was I so stupid? Why hadn’t I done anything? I should have spent time with her instead of locking myself in the bedroom. I hadn’t meant to leave her alone; I’d just… I stared at my feet. What had I meant? I wasn’t sure. Not this, at least. Gina would know, but I couldn’t ask her now.

We should never have got an Android to start with. I should have just dropped the idea, but I wanted something fun, something new, and… I thought back to when Athena’s box opened. It wasn’t true, not really. I’d wanted… I pushed the thought away. It didn’t matter; I couldn’t get it, and anyway, I always made everything worse. It wasn’t for me; this just proved it.

I glanced at Gina next to me. I wanted to ask her what to do. How do you comfort an Android? Should I just say, ‘I’m sorry’? But maybe she wouldn’t forgive me. Man, it never used to be like this. Before Gina, I could always find another sofa for the night if things… I stared at the carpet. …if things became complicated… That’s what I always used to do: move somewhere else when things got messy. I… couldn’t do it this time. I couldn’t leave Gina and Athena, didn’t want to, so… That just left the bedroom.

I pushed back the tears suddenly burning behind my eyes. It sounded like something Gina would say. Did it mean it was true? I wanted to ask her, but I couldn’t stop my thoughts, and they all became chaotic, and I saw Athena crying in her bed, Athena eating breakfast by herself. Athena… They faded, and the first tear rolled down my cheek. It wasn’t Athena, I saw, was it? It was me, I’d done that… I sobbed. What had I done? All I’d ever wanted was to have someone to call family. That’s why I had wanted an Android all along. And instead, I’d pushed her away…